Fallen Eagle

Chapter 85: Not if We Belong

Hey guys! Welcome back to Fallen Eagle! Those three months came and went fast, huh? I know, I wish I could've gotten this one out just a bit earlier, but hey, it beats waiting SEVEN months right? A big reason why this one took a much shorter time than the previous chapter was I have a new editor for the story! Thank you so much to Living Dead Fox for coming aboard and helping me with editing and bouncing ideas off of!

I honestly don't have anything new to report. I can say I'm eager to check out the Season 10 comics, and I'll probably let you know my thoughts on them.

Bladewolf101: Yeah, I kind of expected most people to deduce that Heirloom and Julia's reaction wasn't going to be a pleasant one. I'm just glad that it seems about everyone enjoyed the execution of the idea.

Nostalgia Cop: Evidently there'll be a line :P

The It: Considering how I wrote Applejack in this chapter, the thermonuclear description really is appropriate!

headreviewer mk2: As I've told many friends before, as long as people are willing to talk about the show, create things for the show like stories, art, YouTube skits, analyses, and attend conventions, the fandom really cannot die ^^

Monkeyboy0118: Well, I hope this follow up chapter depicting AJ's mental state is to your liking ^^

Shad03: Long chapters definitely are the best for truly fleshing out the characters and environments. Glad you enjoyed it and I hope this shorter one is still to your liking

HaloloverA001: Thank you so much and happy late holidays to you as well!

Now with those reviews replied to, let's get back to our favorite couple!

(Everyone's Hotel; Ivan's POV)

The trek back through Manehattan and to our hotel was absolutely mentally draining. The complete opposite to what we had expected to experience only a short while before bore down on the two of us, intensifying how much worse we felt with each step taken on the busy sidewalks. Indeed, we had plenty else to worry about on our journey to see Heirloom and Julia, but the silver lining was that Applejack and I had each other to talk to, to bounce thoughts off of and help one another prevent any negative thoughts from lingering in the backs of our minds by offering encouragement. Not to mention, the meeting with Coco was still fresh in our minds as we made our way towards our destination. Discussing a major event regarding one of our closest friends was more than enough of a distraction from allowing our fear and anxiety take control of our thinking.

After what had transpired twenty-five stories above the bustling metropolis, however, there was little to say between the two of us. All I had were negative, downtrodden thoughts thanks in part to the vitriol and rage that Applejack's so-called family spewed towards our big reveal. The twisted, almost unearthly and monstrous looks of pure anger and hate on Heirloom and Julia's faces as they berated their own niece would certainly haunt me for some time to come. Yet, the now hollow and lifeless look on Applejack's face while she forced herself to trudge through the clogged streets of Manehattan is what did me in, preventing me from being able to utter a single word to her since her breakdown.

She looked sad, no doubt, but the aura radiating off the mare was something I'd never seen nor felt from Applejack before. Small streaks of dried tears still stained her cheeks while fresh tears pooled in the bottom of her eyelids, threatening to overflow at any second. However, as we continued down the streets, failing to preclude the events in her former aunt and uncle's apartment from plaguing our thoughts, the blank and emotionless expression that she held before pulling her stetson over her glazed eyes chilled my spine. It was like a small piece of her had died, leaving a tiny void in her heart that she was desperate to fill, yet had no clue where to begin. The dejection on her face, in her eyes and shown by her body language warned me of one thing. We had to get back together with our friends, and quickly. Both for her sake and the baby's. I prayed that just being in the same room as friends that meant the world to us would hopefully begin to patch my cowgirl's broken heart.

"Damn," I shakily whispered upon failing to spot any of our friends waiting in the lobby of our hotel. Sure, it was quite the long shot to expect that we would bump into any one them—even just one—so soon after the ordeal, but I couldn't bear to release that small amount of hope I held that would bring the two of us some comfort and relief. Cursing a little more, I abandoned the anticipation that one of our friends would appear from the streets outside and turned back to Applejack so we could hurry upstairs to our room. The problem was, she wasn't where I last saw her. "Hmm?" I blinked, my head darting back and forth as a feeling of panic rose in my chest before noticing that Applejack was now further ahead of me, having been swallowed up by the swarm of hotel guests checking in or out. The realization that I had slowed my pace when I took a quick scan of the lobby for our friends didn't seem to resonate with her. Though, could I really blame the poor mare?

I put on as straight a face as I could muster and squirmed my way through a gaggle of other tourists happily chatting with one another about the first day of their vacation, unaware of the pained and sorrowful pony which had just walked through them. "AJ!" I exclaimed softly, trying to catch up with her as she entered one of the three available elevators. Soon after, though, I found out that jogging over wasn't necessary. The despondent mare turned around to wait for me to rejoin her before slowly collapsing to her haunches. She did not even have the strength nor willpower to push the floor button on the elevator's wall. The elevator shook as I hopped inside, barely squeezing through the door as it had begun to shut. Though I understood that it would still open even if it collided with my body, I just couldn't allow Applejack out of my sight, not in her state. "Hey," I called out gently, catching my breath while approaching AJ more calmly so I wouldn't amplify her stress. I figured that since we had at least some peace and quiet, perhaps she would feel like talking.

"…." Applejack failed to make a single sound in response. Not even a weak sigh escaped the depressed frown that appeared to be frozen on her muzzle. The mare continued to sit in the center of the elevator, glazed eyes fixated on the ground below with nothing but the swelling of her chest as her only movements.

I absolutely refused to force her to speak if she didn't feel like it. So, I happily granted Applejack's wish and opted instead to push the sixth floor button, daring not to utter another word. The machinery within the elevator shaft whirred to life, lurching upward as we began our ascent to the sixth floor of the hotel.

Plop!

My eyes drifted down to find the source of the noise, only to see that Applejack's prized stetson she inherited from her father had lazily slid off her mane to the elevator's carpet with a sad plop. I didn't move and chose to agonizingly wait and see if AJ would have the strength to pick up something she held so near and dear to her heart. If she didn't…I was completely lost on what I could do to heal her.

We passed by the second floor before Applejack even reacted. Her eyelids closed and opened gingerly, assessing what had happened before letting out a pained sigh. My heart rose for the briefest of seconds, happy to hear at least something come out of her. That small second of joy crashed and burned when she only picked up the crumpled stetson and held it within her hoof, not even attempting to put it back atop her mane.

"Don't feel bad, Sugarcube," came the weak voice from my girlfriend, her throat raspy and sore from the outburst only a short while ago.

"W-what?" I asked, worriedly kneeling beside her so she wouldn't have to strain her voice any further. With another sigh, AJ dropped her hoof and hat back to the floor, slowly cocking her head over to my kneeling form.

"'Taint yer fault what happened, Ivan. Don't feel bad fer mah sake," she reiterated in a whisper and with a slight shake of her head.

I frowned, struggling to find what to say before reaching down to grab Applejack's hat. Grasping it, I smoothed out the material as best as I could and gingerly set it back on her head while forcing a smile across my lips. "I-I know, but I just can't help it hun," I replied and held my hand against her back. The pain of seeing the mare I loved so much in such a defeated state was close to unbearable. I wanted to throw my arms back around AJ and hold her close until her broken heart was mended, yet I had to hold myself back and wait until we could get back to our hotel room. The fear that I may unintentionally make her feel worse tightened its grip around me, preventing me from expressing that I didn't want her to be in this pain alone. That and I sought to avoid giving her cliché empty promises like, 'It's all going to be okay,' or, 'We'll get through this.' I had to actually speak to her and touch her core in order to help her overcome this depression before it went on too long; coming up with the right things to say wasn't going to happen on a short elevator ride.

The third and fourth floors came and went before Applejack reacted to my attempts to lift her grounded spirits. Her emerald eyes drifted up to her righted stetson before she blinked, sights now set upon me. It was very weak, but I could discern that the edges of her lips faintly curled upwards into a small smile. "Th-thanks, Ivan," she leaned over and rested her chin on my knee, her body practically going limp against my leg.

A twinge of hope flared up within my chest and a breath caught in my throat thanks to the brief sign of happiness from Applejack. I smiled in return, but I had to swallow my joy. Only a damned fool would celebrate now and believe all was well. With a hard gulp, I sighed and simply responded with, "Any time, hun," as my fingers played with the ponytail on the back of her neck.

Ding!

The ding from above extinguished our quick spark of comfort, signaling that we'd arrived on the hotel's sixth floor. As the lift came to a stop and the doors slowly parted, I was forced to make Applejack move. "Come on, AJ," I sadly advised the mare, grunting as I attempted to stand up from kneeling. My arm found itself curled around the mare's torso, supporting her as I stood up to avoid letting her limp form to fall to the floor. Luckily, the willpower she retained was just enough to stand on her own, albeit weakly, allowing my arm to slip from her belly as she dragged herself into the hallway.

With her smile gone, my heart sank right back down into my stomach, yet I sucked it up and was by her side in the blink of an eye, refusing to let her out of my sight again. That and I had the key-card to the hotel room.

I suppose we could count it as a blessing that the room for our brief Manehattan visit was only but a few doors away from the bank of elevators; getting back didn't take long whatsoever. Even with our more restricted pace, we had reached our destination before we even knew it.

"Here, AJ," I unlocked the door and held it open for her. She gave a mumbling, "Thanks, Sugarcube," in reply and moseyed into the room. I followed, allowing the door to close by itself so I could maintain the close proximity with Applejack as she pulled herself up onto the bed near the window.

Applejack said nothing more and, akin to her actions in the elevator, sat on her haunches, back against the pillows with her head lazily bowed and chin resting on her furry chest. Her golden blonde tail hung over the side of the bed, the end of it gently swaying from her earlier climb, yet she made no attempt to pull it up beside her, emphasizing just how drained she felt.

Without a second guess, I made my way around the foot of the bed and arriving at the opposite side, quietly taking a seat next to my girlfriend. Her glazed over and almost dead eyes from earlier had frightened me, but I would've preferred to be greeted by that sight than what was currently awaiting me. Those gorgeous green eyes that I fell in love with were tightly shut, barring me the chance to look into them so I could at least attempt to alleviate some of her pain without saying much. Her eyes were like a map that I could normally use to gauge what exactly she needed, be it trust, love, friendship or even comfort. Unfortunately, with their closure, I was left even more lost on what I could do to proceed with comforting Applejack.

What exactly could I do? What in the world could I say? I clenched my fists together, my knuckles cracking simultaneously as my mind raced to figure out where to begin.

A sniffle, nearly reaching the point that it was inaudible, escaped from AJ's nose. The mare's body started to rock back and forth gently, all the while continuing to let out a sniffle every now and then. I twisted around in my spot until I was able to face Applejack head on, my hand reaching out to her.

The demons plaguing my mind with doubt and apprehension were still present, but I shoved them to the side for the time being. This was a tumultuous time for the both of us. Not the first and certainly not the last one we would encounter together, but due to the circumstances of us building a family and future of our own, times like this could not be spent second guessing ourselves.

With a deep breath through my nostrils, I reached over and gently placed my hand upon her back, rubbing it in a circular pattern like a small massage. The mare's body shivered at my touch, allowing a third sniffle out of her nose. Her body at least stopped rocking.

"Hey," I swallowed, continuing to rub her back. Applejack's lips parted with a smack, followed by a heavy inhale. Her right eye barely opened to a slit, though I could make out her pupil looking directly at me through the narrow opening.

"H-Hey," she croaked. My heart was on the verge of shattering into a thousand pieces; a singular tear swelled out of her eye and rolled down past the freckles on her cheek and onto the blanket below.

My jaw dropped slightly as I reached down and wiped away the trail that her tear left behind on her cheek, trying to keep it dry for AJ. I gave her a smile once it was done, but alas, it did little to comfort the mare. Still, however, she kept her gaze fixated upon me. "D-do you want to talk, hun?" I offered, words continuing to be a bit troublesome to speak as my mind failed to slow so I could properly articulate.

Another sniffle. "'Bout what?" She asked, her voice coming out incredibly shaky as she wiped her muzzle with one of her forelegs. Applejack blinked, allowing a few more tears to be squeezed out of her eye, dripping off her cheek.

"A-Anything you want, AJ," I hastily replied, feeling my anxiety rise due to both the silence and Applejack's distraught state. The mare then turned her head, looking directly at me face to face. The holding back of her tears for so long had once again turned the whites of her eyes to a light shade of scarlet, further fueling my own sadness as I was reminded what little I could do at the moment to help her.

With another blink, she answered, "Oh yeah? A-Anythin' Ah want, huh?" Her eyebrows somewhat furrowed, not to the point she was scowling, but irritation was clearly beginning to surface and battle with Applejack's depression. Her flat expression in conjunction with the tear stains matting her furry cheeks was a little unsettling and caused me to miss a breath. Something just didn't feel right about her sudden change in demeanor. Gulping, I bit my lip and braced myself, awaiting whatever her response would be. However, my hand remained firmly in place, daring not to retreat from her back.

"Well sure, why not?" She spat, voice raising in volume. My body flinched a little and tensed up, but I still refused to move away from the mare. "Ah mean, what's there really ta talk about? How Ah just lost mah aunt n' uncle that Ah thought loved me?!" Her eyebrows furrowed even more after her outburst. Numerous tears flowed freely from her crimson eyes, her breathing came out more erratically and I could feel her body trembling even more as she clenched her jaws with the force of a vise.

'Oh no," I thought, realizing my mistake of asking her to talk much too soon. She was still far too emotional to speak constructively, not that I could blame her at all, but I was kicking myself for asking if she wanted to talk instead of patiently waiting by her side for her to ask me to talk with her. Swallowing, I briskly sought to end the conversation before it made Applejack beat herself up any more. "Applejack-" I managed to spit out before it was too late.

She took in a shaky breath, bearing her teeth as she bellowed. "O-Or how Ah was an idiot 'n thought it'd be a good idea to rush into tellin' two family members that we were gonna be parents?!" Applejack roared at the top her lungs, causing my ears to ring for a solid five seconds after she ceased her yelling. Despite all this, my hand still never left her back, nor did I move away at all from my seat on the bed, no matter how hard she was trembling or how loud she screamed. I was the cause of this mess; I'm the one thing that pushed her into this outburst of anger, and by God, I was not going to back out of it like a coward. I was going to remain with her, no matter how enraged AJ would become. Was I scared of her anger? Of course I was, but it wasn't solely because seeing my girlfriend angry was terrifying, but I was also afraid of how damaging this could be to both her mental health and the baby's physical health.

"Hun, please," I begged, my heart straining to hold itself together while I looked at the rage, pain and heartache carved into my cowgirl's face.

Applejack took in a few more ragged breaths, continuing on with her verbal rampage. "It ain't fair! It ain't fair AT ALL!"

"I-I know, hun, but-"

"H-How can they just up 'n disown me all because Ah love ya?! I-It's like all of a sudden, they forgot about the good things you've done!" With her eyes and jaws clenched shut, Applejack's screaming and hollering finally came to a halt, at least for a brief moment. Yet, that didn't help with the improvement of her morale. Forced and ragged breaths were the only sounds that emitted from her mouth as she attempted to swallow her sobs.

This was it. I knew I could no longer treat her like she was made of glass and summoned the strength to move my hand, though I didn't move it away from her orange back. Gently stroking up and down, I massaged her back with as much love and affection as I could, just trying to instill even a single drop of peace into her emotional ocean. "AJ?" I asked wearily, taking a complete shot in the dark at how unpredictable her reaction would be.

After another choked sob had been expelled from the mare's muzzle, she opened her eyes and ever so slowly peered at me. A torrent of tears cascaded from her eyelids, having been held in from the clenching of her eyes, and dripped to her foreleg and the bedding below. "I-I didn't mean for this to happen when I asked if you wanted to talk, Applejack," I confessed. "I just couldn't sit there and let you blame yourself or beat yourself up over what…..they did," I explained, trying to carefully choose my words. Not knowing if even saying Heirloom and Julia's names would set Applejack off, I opted for the most basic word to refer to them. I cautiously shifted my hand from her back to her freckled cheek, shakily using my thumb to wipe away the tears that continued to gush from her eyes.

"…..." Applejack sniffled and appeared to try and say something, but all that I could decipher were strained and weak mumbles that came close to forming words. It wasn't a long sentence or anything resembling that; it sounded as though all Applejack was trying to say was only about four or five words total.

"What hun?" I swallowed, wiping away another few tears from her cheeks.

AJ's body trembled some more as she sighed. "It's ll m flt," she weakly yet more clearly said again. Still, I couldn't truly understand what she was trying to say, and I was afraid that if I asked again, her emotions would go for another wild ride. Unfortunately, my silent response worked the same as if I had asked her to repeat herself a second time.

Applejack gathered enough strength and briefly raised her head, tilting it so she could get a better look at me and whispered, "It's all mah fault Sugarcube."

"Huh?" I blinked, stupefied at her guilt-ridden admission. "What are you talking about, Applejack?" I prodded. "It wasn't your fault they reacted like that," my thumb stopped brushing away her tears as I just cupped her cheek with the palm of my hand.

Shamefully, the mare pulled her cheek away from my hand, leaving it and, subsequently, my heart feeling empty. "'Tain't that, Ivan. Ah mean….Ah was so stupid ta rush into this. Ah was too eager ta get this off mah chest ta other members o' the family that Ah didn't stop ta think that maybe Aunt n' Uncle Orange weren't the best ta tell first!" Applejack berated herself, her voice gradually raising in volume from a weak whisper to nearly yelling once again.

My fingers curled around the space that my girlfriend's cheek had previously been occupying, longing to regain that soft touch of her furry freckles. I reached my hand over, doing whatever I could to reassure Applejack that none of this was her fault. I was only met with heartbreaking disappointment when she turned away from me, head hanging with shame. "Please," I begged, hand shaking.

"Ah'm so sorry Ivan; Ah've ruined everythin'," she sighed. "Any chance we had o' breakin' the happiest news o' mah life ta the rest o' mah kin is gone like smoke in the wind," AJ quietly and solemnly said, her voice reverting back to a weak croak.

"….How?" I asked in utter disbelief. I completely understood how and why she felt so defeated right now, but was her confidence so shattered that she didn't believe any future chances of delivering the news of our child would be welcomed at all? It then dawned on me that this was precisely how I sounded to her after suffering that horrific nightmare where her family tried to hang me for fathering a child into her womb.

"A-Aunt 'n Un-Uncle Orange are probably writin' letters ta every Apple across Equestria right now ta warn them o' what we've done!" AJ cried out, her sobs coming back with a vengeance.

'Oh no,' I thought. The idea of her faith becoming as dwindled as mine that night was just something I couldn't bear to think about. "No," I firmly stated. "AJ, we can still give our own side to your entire family at the reunion," I tried to comfort her. "Even if some are told in advance, we can sit them down and assure them how much we love each other and that we're in this pregnancy together. Hell, we can even show off our own bedroom that we're trying to build onto your family's farmhouse! That should really show them how dedicated we are to this even if it wasn't planned!" I exclaimed. "Together, I promise," I added. "You promised me that you would be by my side when we told the rest of your family. Well, I'm swearing to you by the same thing hun. You won't face your cousins, aunts and uncles alone," a few tears of my own slid down my face as I found myself reaching over to place my hand on her belly. Sure, we had no clue in Hell as to how the rest of her family would react, but I had to instill the same encouragement in Applejack that she did with me after the worst nightmare of my life.

As my hand got close to her belly, however, Applejack's sobs turned to wails. Without warning, the mare let out a shriek that made me jump up from my spot as she whirled around on the bed, diving towards the pillows near the headboard. I hovered above my spot frozen and wide-eyed, unable to move while Applejack jammed her face into one of the pillows and continued to loudly wail.

"Ah-Ah must look so pathetic ta ya!" AJ's muffled cry sounded from her hotel pillow after about ten seconds of crying.

"What?" I asked, my body stuck mid-air between standing up and sitting on the bed. The usual self-confidence Applejack oozed was now completely gone, sapped from her body like a Dementor sucking the soul out of Sirus Black.

"Ah'm a complete mess!" Applejack pulled her head away from the pillow, glaring at me. Her face was something I'd never seen before. Both anger and sadness had resumed their struggle to be the dominant expression as tears stained the orange fur and white freckles that made up her face. Her emerald eyes contrasted against the scarlet that had replaced the whites of her eyes from how hard she'd been bawling. AJ then tried to choke back a sob. "H-How can Ah expect ta be a good mother if Ah'm like this?"

My backside finally collapsed to the surface of the bed. It wasn't because I decided to sit down; I just couldn't believe the words Applejack was saying. I knew it was her hormones that was the culprit behind her quick emotional outbursts, but those words and lack of confidence that questioned her abilities haunted me.

Her mood swings had become absolute hell for the country mare. Sadness and anger continued to fight one another for dominance over Applejack's attitude, and she was the loser no matter the outcome. I had to do something to help her combat these swings before any further consequences befell her or our baby. As she continued to quietly sob into her pillow, berating herself for just about damn near everything that had gone wrong in the past hour, there was but a single idea that crossed my mind. Something that I'd seen and heard my friends do multiple times to comfort others around them. Something that Luna and Celestia had done for me on Hearth's Warming Eve….

As she wiped her tears with her foreleg, I gently laid down next to the mare I loved and did something I rarely dared: I reached over and removed her lopsided hat. Before she could question me, I put my other hand on top of her beautiful, golden blonde mane and began to stroke it, petting her in the hope that she would become calm. "You are not pathetic," I whispered, scooting over closer until our faces were only separated by a mere inch. "Crying doesn't make anyone pathetic, Applejack." I gave her a reassuring kiss to her forehead, continuing to simultaneously pet her head.

I turned around and placed her stetson gently on the nightstand between the beds before curling back up next to her. My arms snaked their way around her disheveled and quivering body as I laid my head next to hers, placing another long kiss upon her wet and salty cheek.

Her sobs came to a halt, her body froze, her beautiful green eyes fixated on me and her ears curiously twitched at my unannounced actions. As my lips pulled away from her cheek, and I held her close, I whispered, "I love you," and began to sing to her one of the most consoling songs I knew.

Applejack's eyes widened as I sang in a near whisper, allowing a few more tears to escape her eyelids. It was a gentle, simple song from Def Leppard called 'We Belong,' and I believed it contained the perfect lyrics to help Applejack both gain control of her stress and anger as well as reassure her that nothing would be able to separate us.

As I entered the second verse, I felt my girlfriend's body shift, but I continued to sing even as she raised her right foreleg from underneath the pillow and wipe away the tears from her face. She blinked away any further tears while her lips quivered, slowly morphing into a faint smile. Though pain still remained on her face, I could tell just by the look in her eyes that the song was working to mend her broken heart. Her body shivered as she swallowed back another sob, mouth opening to release the breath that she was holding in.

Because of this, I paused momentarily, unsure of what she would do. I became fearful that perhaps her emotions were becoming strained too far to the other side. However, what she did next truly surprised me. Through a very strained voice, Applejack picked up the song right from where I'd paused. Now it was my turn for my mouth to become agape and eyes to widen so much that I thought they would pop right from their sockets. I was shocked she knew the lyrics to their exact words, and despite the fact that her voice was incredibly hoarse from crying and yelling so much over the past hour, her beautiful southern accent shined through.

Still caught off guard by the fact that she had overtaken the song, AJ's hoof moved from her own face to mine, cupping my cheek so that we were now both holding each other by the time she reached the song's bridge.

I was so enthralled by her singing and her hoof on my cheek that I didn't even realize that she had come to a stop herself, refusing to continue. It was only the gentle nuzzling of her nose on mine that helped my mind catch up to what was happening. I didn't know how long she had paused for, but it then dawned on me that she actually waiting for me. As I blinked and looked into her eyes, Applejack gave me a little nod, further encouraging me.

With a gulp, I nodded in return, and we then started to sing the second half together as one voice. From then on, the song became more than just a source of comfort for myself and the love of my life, but a source of peace for the two of us. Even though we were both harmonizing quietly, knowing that she and I were using the song to try and comfort one another from the heart made it feel as though we were singing to each other back at Sweet Apple Acres. No one but the two of us under the gorgeous sunset of Celestia's sky, peacefully strolling through her family's orchard with the events of the past hour nothing but a nightmare.

Eventually though, we hit the final word to the song, and we were sucked back into our Manehattan hotel room. Back were the memories of her aunt and uncle's hatred, back was the difficult task of digging into Applejack's heart so I could heal it for her, and back I was at square one to help her.

My heart sank once we were both finished; Applejack's weak smile faltered, reverting into her quivering frown as her eyes drifted downward. No. I refused to let her fall back into the phase of beating herself up. I fished my arm out from under her and placed a finger underneath her chin, gently pulling it up so it was easier for her to look at me. I pulled her in closer with my other arm, resting my chin on top of her disheveled yet still silky mane, my heart fluttering at our close proximity.

There was no hesitation from the mare. Applejack lunged forward, resting her head in the crook of my neck as we held each other, not another word breathed for God knows how long. Finally, AJ let out a sharp exhale, struggling to talk. "I-Ivan?" She said into my neck.

"Yeah?" I asked and nuzzled her head with my chin.

A sad nicker followed suit before she managed to speak. "Ah...Ah'm so-" she began. In a flash, my finger made its way to her lips, softly pushing against her maw and cutting off her apology.

"No," I lifted my chin off her head and pulled away, gazing down into her eyes. A look of surprise greeted me as I retracted my finger from her orange lips. Shaking my head, I continued. "Please don't apologize, Applejack." I moved my hand to the back of her head, my fingers playing with her tangled mane as well as massaging the flesh and fur. Applejack still seemed a bit confused from my interruption, but the mare simply gulped and nodded at my plea.

"There's no reason for you to. Like I told you before, hun, crying doesn't make you weak; letting your feelings out was the right choice before you bottled them up too much," I reassured her. With a blink, AJ's hoof slowly glided down my chest and abdomen before she made it down to the slight bulge in her stomach. She opened her eyes and let more pent up tears slide out. "I know what happened hurts, AJ, but beating yourself up over a decision made by others won't help at all…." I stopped, thinking back to all those years I beat up and blamed myself for what happened to my parents. The guilt and anger built up over so long only served to make my early adult life miserable; if I hadn't been shot down that night over the Bermuda Triangle into Equestria and been given a second chance at happiness, I don't know what kind of mess I would've turned into. That's the mess I desperately wanted Applejack to avoid becoming. Even though the majority of her life had been far happier than my own, this was still catastrophic to her mental health and, if not helped quickly, could be a permanent effect.

I gulped, shedding a few of my own tears due to the overwhelming emotions raining down upon me. "I should know," I admitted. "I refused to let myself be truly happy for almost my whole life because of my parents, and I don't want that same self-doubt and guilt to hurt you, AJ," I did my best to hold a smile as my fingers tried to smooth out the hair atop her mane.

"Uh-huh," she nodded, leaning her head into my palm, her mouth trying to smile.

"Look, I know this outcome with your aunt and uncle was not what we wanted, but I think the worst must be behind us," I speculated. Confusion returned to Applejack's face.

"What do ya mean, Sugarcube?"

"Well, what happened was awful, something I wouldn't wish for anyone to go through, but knowing how loving and understanding your brother and sister are, as well as Granny Smith and Braeburn, I just have to believe that your other family members can't react the same way...they did."

"Y-yeah. The rest o' the Apple family ain't anythin' like they are," AJ conceded, still avoiding the use of her aunt and uncle's names. "Still Ivan, Ah'm just...Ah'm just scared. All the hope Ah had for tellin' mah family Ah was havin' a baby with ya is just about gone, an' Ah want mah family ta have a good relationship with our child, no matter what it turns out ta be!" She cried out.

"Shh, shh, shh," I gently cooed, pulling her back close to me, yet still allowing her enough space to hold her belly with her hoof. "I know, Applejack, I know. You're still early into your pregnancy, yet you had our baby's best interest at heart by trying to warm up other family members to the idea that we were starting a family together. You should be proud of yourself for that," I complimented.

The mare sniffled and poked her head out from the crook of my neck. "Th-Thank ya, Ivan," she said, cuddling up against me and nuzzling her cheek on mine.

I couldn't help but lightly chuckle at her affections. "Of course, Applejack," I gladly nuzzled her in return. "Although, I have been thinking."

"Oh yeah?"

"Mhmm," my eyes looked away from her mane to the pillow below my head. "What happened could probably be seen as a good learning experience for the both of us," I said as my gaze reverted to AJ's mane. Applejack's wet cheek glided across my own, her head pulling itself away as she looked at me curiously.

"Learnin' experience? What do ya mean, Sugarcube?"

My body tensed up. I had rough waters to tread incredibly carefully ahead of me. I finally helped calm AJ down enough to talk; what I was about to say could easily be taken the wrong way. Hurting her, albeit unintentionally, could potentially do damage that may take months to help her recover from.

Doing my best to relax, I let out a deep sigh and stared into her emerald eyes. "Yeah. Maybe for the reunion, I think we should lead your family with the fact that we're together first…." I hesitated and braced myself, fearing that she may take my suggestion in the worst way possible.

Seconds ticked on by; Applejack didn't say a word, nor did her body language indicate any sort of reaction to what I had said. I couldn't turn to check the clock on the nearby nightstand, and checking the time on my phone was out of the question as well. I could only guess that the seconds were turning into minutes as Applejack processed my words. At least that's what it felt like before she did anything in response.

With a rough swallow from the mare, I was shocked to hear a chuckle of all things coming from AJ's maw! My face fell in confusion and my mouth went slightly agape. "Uh yeah," she still let out a quiet chuckle, a tinge of blush rising on her cheeks. "Ah suppose that'd work better than what Ah ran us head first into."

"Applejack," I replied sternly, my shock quickly dying down as concern took over.

"No, Sugarcube, Ah ain't tryin' ta blame mahself!" She reassured me with a quick peck to my nose. "It's just, Ah know it was a mistake ta say Ah was pregnant before tellin' Aunt 'n Uncle Orange that you were mah special somepony."

"Still," I bit my lip, trying to think of another reason why her aunt and uncle's reaction was NOT her fault. "They sort of steered the conversation towards having children."

"Ah know, Ivan. That still doesn't mean Ah can't take responsibility fer spillin' the beans in the wrong order, Sugarcube. Ah just didn't think enough about who we were tellin'," she confessed. "The truth is, Ah was so eager, so happy ta not only meet with Aunt n' Uncle Orange fer the first time since Ah was a filly, but tell more o' mah family that Ah was startin' a family o' mah own with the most amazin' creature in mah life," she allowed herself to smile, tears pooling in her eyes once more. However, these tears were not born of sorrow and pain; they were tears of love and happiness at the prospect of our future together.

"Applejack," I whispered myself, leaning in to kiss the mare again as my emotions overwhelmed me. Our lips connected, and the spark that had been there since we confessed our feelings engulfed the two of us, transforming into an inferno of emotions and instilling us with a calming sense of peace.

We pulled away after losing track of the time, our lungs burning for the sweet relief of oxygen. As we gasped for air, Applejack said, "Ah love ya so much, Ivan. We'll do it the right way at the reunion 'n build ya up ta mah family before we even hint that we're expectin', Sugarcube. Ah don't know if that'll warm up all o' them ta the idea, but Ah just know they'll love the good man ya are, Ivan, the way our friends, mah granny, mah brother, mah sister 'n Ah do," she smiled wider than she had in the previous hour. "An' even if it doesn't work, well, there ain't anythin' we can do about it."

I nodded in agreement. "We'll still have your immediate kin and our friends' support. More importantly, we'll have each other, Applejack," I emphasized by palming her belly. "The only thing we can do is come clean, but I want to believe your other family members will have a better response, no matter how much my anxiety tries to make me feel otherwise," my eyes darted downward to our connection.

Applejack moved her hoof back to my cheek. "Ivan, y'all were here fer me when we told Aunt n' Uncle Orange. Ya don't have anythin' ta worry about with the rest o' mah family. Just remember, Granny Smith, Big Mac, Braeburn 'n Ah will be there fer ya," she reminded me.

"And maybe Pinkie?" I suggested. "You know, since there's a chance the Pies and the Apples could be related?" Having another friend's voice to support us at the reunion couldn't hurt whatsoever; who better than someone who always tries to see the positive in everything like Pinkie?

AJ chuckled again. "Ah think that can be arranged, Ivan." She said, leaning in to kiss me again when the hotel room door suddenly opened.

"WE'RE BAAAAACK!" Pinkie Pie announced in a shrill sing-song voice as our friends filed into the room.

Applejack and I pulled away from each other and sat up on the bed, a part of us happy to be in the company of our friends. The other part of us, however, were still entrapped in emotional turmoil and needed time to recover from our little therapy session.

"H-Hey guys," I greeted with a tiny wave of my hand, not even trying to hide how disheveled and mentally exhausted both AJ and I were.

"My word! Cougar, Applejack!" Rarity gasped, dropping her half-dozen shopping bags and galloped her way over to the bed. "W-What in Celestia's name happened? You both look absolutely dreadful!" The marshmallow colored unicorn propped herself up on her hind legs, putting one of her forelegs on my chest.

It didn't take long for Twilight, Fluttershy, Pinkie, Spike, Rainbow and Celestia to surround our bed, each of the six joining Rarity with worry etched on their faces, asking us what had happened.

I threw an arm around Applejack's shoulder, pulling her in close to me as I drew in a deep breath, ready to fill our friends in on what had transpired in the apartment of AJ's former aunt and uncle.

Thankfully, this discussion would go on to be the polar opposite of the one that took place before. Interruptions, assumptions and judgments were not to be found in our circle of friends. The ponies and dragon that surrounded us, listening to each word intently, allowed us the breathing room to pause when we needed to and the support we needed when things got to be too much.

"You poor things," Celestia said breathlessly after we were done, her magic wiping away a tear from her eyes. The tall alicorn wrapped her impressive wings around us, hugging us lovingly. "I-I'm so sorry you both had to suffer through such cruelty," she apologized. I could feel a few of her tears dripping onto my head.

"H-How can family members say such things to each other?!" Fluttershy cried out, heartbroken as she covered her eyes with her hooves.

"Is there anything we can do for you two?" Twilight asked. "D-Do you need anything?" She pressed, clearly fighting to keep her anger under control.

"No," AJ shook her head. "Ah think y'all have done more than enough fer us already," she gave the lavender alicorn a smile. "Th-thank ya," she added.

"You're our friends, darling," Rarity dabbed her eyes with a special embroidered cloth. "We're more than happy to offer support when you need it, especially after what you two have been through," she patted AJ's head.

"Yeah," I nodded, reaching over and grasping Rarity's hoof. "I've never been more thankful to have friends like all of you," I grinned at the fashionista.

"Hey, I've got an idea!" Rainbow Dash cut in, flying up and landing at the foot of the bed. "Why don't we just order room service and spend our last night in Manehattan here? You know? All of us together, pigging out on hotel food and swapping stories and all that junk?" She suggested.

"Yeah! Nothing's better than stuffing bellies and telling funny stories with friends!" She gave off a huge grin as she held the hotel's room service menu in her hoof.

AJ and I looked at each other and smiled at one another. "If it's okay with Twilight and Spike," I shot a glance over at the two other occupants of the room.

"Of course! I don't have an issue with that, Cougar," Twilight nodded in approval.

"Then I think that sounds perfect, Pinkie," I replied and looked back at Applejack.

"Eeyup," she nuzzled my nose with her own.

END CHAPTER 85

Well, at least this time it didn't take seven months to get a chapter out! Again, huge thank you to Living Dead Fox for taking the reigns on editing for my chapters! This one in particular was really interesting to write so I could illustrate how badly Applejack's mentality was hit and I hope it's a good follow up to the horrific ending with AJ's aunt and uncle Orange.

Also, I advise you to PLEASE check out Def Leppard's song We Belong so you can really be touched by its lyrics and melody. I understand it's really strange that I didn't include the lyrics with the story since I've done that for every other song so far, but I want to distance myself from doing that to avoid breaking the rules.

Next time: We revisit a VERY old plot point to the story. Which one? Just sit back and find out!