May 1971

Friday

Alice

It's been five days since Jasper climbed out the window and Dr. Cullen preformed emergency surgery. Jazz is sleeping now, he's been sleeping a lot since the surgery but I can tell he is feeling better.

Everything feels calmer now.

I watch the rise and fall of his chest. I want to hold his hand but I think better of it, I don't want to risk startling him. He hasn't brought up leaving again. I'm hoping this means that he trusts Dr. Cullen now. He told me about their conversation. He explained how Dr. Cullen knew his real name and about him running away and he still preformed the surgery.

Dr. Cullen truly saved him, he found him that night when he was missing and saved Jazz's life. I'm so happy that everything is working out. Really happy. I knew it would work out, things have a way of doing that.

He's been sleeping really well and it's doing him good. He's got some new scars now and lots of stitches. Dr. Cullen showed us a piece of the shrapnel that was inside of Jasper. It was sharp and jagged. I saw Jasper cringe at the sight of it. It made my insides hurt just looking at it.

I am glad that Dr. Cullen has finally gotten Jasper to agree to take some painkillers. Nothing as strong as morphine. But something that is just enough to ease the pain. He was stubborn but Dr. Cullen was persuasive. I haven't heard him moaning in his sleep at all since.

"Hey." His sleepy voice drifts to my ears and through my thoughts. I realize as I've been hypnotically watching him breath he's woken up. He's looking at me lazily his head still sunk into the pillow. I can see the amusement in his eyes at my expense. I can also see the wheels turning behind his eyes. "What are you thinking?"

"Do you think I could get my hair cut?"

"Really?" I was not expecting that.

"Yeah, it's gotten pretty long." It was hanging at his chin now. "even just a few inches off would be better." He pulled a lock in front of his face to look at it before brushing it back. "Do you think you could do it?"

"Hum, I told you about my hair cutting catastrophe. I don't know that I'd trust me with scissors around ears."

"I trust you Alice. I'm sure you wouldn't hurt me."

"Well not on purpose. Never on purpose, but me and scissor are a dangerous combination." I really didn't feel confident doing it myself but... "We'll figure it out."

"What do you think we should do when I'm discharged?" My heart sinks a little at his question I had hoped he'd go a bit longer before starting to worry again. He adjusts himself on the bed so he's sitting up and able to look at me squarely while wearing the most serious expression on his face.

"Don't you worry about that Jazz." I never spend too much time worrying, Things work themselves out eventually. Besides we've got each other and we've come this far.

Carlisle

It certainly hasn't been dull since Jasper and Alice stepped into my office last week. As a doctor I have often had other's lives in my hands, it's a burden that comes with the job. My patients put their faith in me and I in return do everything I can to give them back their lives. Sometimes even after the treatment, after the surgery my job isn't done. I'm not done here.

Jasper Whitlock's birth certificate arrived today. It is back in my office under lock and key. I read it and reread it to make sure I was reading it correctly. His birthday is April 29, 1954 he's only just 17 years old. How in the world had anyone seen this boy as someone old enough to put on a uniform and go to war? Had they been that desperate for bodies to fill boots or had his experiences aged him just enough to pass.

I stand in the doorway to room 121 just like I have more than a few times this week. He's sleeping now and I'm glad for that. He seems to be sleeping easier since the surgery. There haven't been anymore night terrors. Which is hopefully because we've got his medication sorted out and his stress level down and not because his body is just exhausted. The nurses have been watching him like a cast of hawks. None of them wanting to be the one he escapes on. I don't think they need to worry so much I don't think he's planning to go anywhere.

I wonder when I should tell him about my most recent discussion with Dr. Knox. I need to tell him and I've been putting it off. I've just been worried about upsetting him. It's terrible I know to keep news from him, it's just that he's recovering and I don't want anything to derail that progress. How will he react when he knows that this Maria woman is being charged with murder and that there is a possibility that he will be legally compelled to return to the very place he escaped to face her.

I worry that after I tell him I will need to have someone keep an eye on him.

"Hello Dr. Cullen. Happy Friday." Alice says from the hallway behind me. She must have been stretching her legs.

"Hello Alice." I chuckle. " Happy Friday to you too."

"Do you need to see Jack... um Jasper." She corrects herself, he must have told her that I know.

"Not right now Alice, it's not urgent, I don't want to disturb him sleeping." She nods at the thought. I know how relieved she's been by his change for the better. She's been by his side through all of this. She's been his support through everything as far as I can see.

An odd thought about this young woman at my side occurs to me and I have to ask. "Alice what is your last name, I don't think I ever asked?"

"Brandon. Well hum, that's the name they gave me at the orphanage. I was found there when I was a few days old. On Brandon Street in Biloxi. My full name is Mary Alice Brandon. I like to go by Alice, Mary seems sort of plain."

"Alice is a lovely name." She smiles at the compliment. "Did you grow up in the Orphanage?"

"Yes, well mostly. I was never adopted." She didn't too upset by the thought but I hated to think of her and really any child not having family to care for them.

"I'm sorry for that, I think that you are a young woman any parents could be proud of. "

"That's very kind of you to say."

"I certainly think that you're the reason that Jasper is doing as well as he is." She blushed at my compliment.

"Thank you Dr. Cullen."

"I've been to Biloxi, to the state hospital. Is that where you saw me before?"

"They said I was out of control, that I was a bad influence on the others in the girls home so they sent me to the state hospital to be under supervision. I don't think I was out of control. I just didn't think like they did."

I'm shocked, what a horrible thing to do to a young girl. That state hospital was a terrible depressing place. In fact I was there to lecture on the effects of positivity on patients.

"Dr. Cullen..." Before I can say anything Alice speaks again. "Jasper was wondering if he could have his hair cut, I didn't know if I could borrow some scissors and do it."

"That's not a bad idea. I'll get something worked out Alice."

Jasper

I wake up to a quiet room and blink up at the ceiling. As soon as I do a thought, a memory, engulfs me. I stared up at a similar ceiling when I first woke up in the VA in Philadelphia. It had been too bright and smelled too strongly of disinfectant. At first the place seemed quiet and I had breathed a sigh of relief to have left the war zone and thought I was safe. I should have known that was a mistake, most times in my life safety has proven to be an illusion.

The wailing started and it cut through every nerve in my body like a buzz saw. He'd been inconsolable, this soldier who's face I never saw. I could hear him and hear the nurses talk about him. Even when they drugged him he still wailed all through the night. I hoped and wished and prayed that he would find peace so that I could too. Every cry pierced through me, the smack of every hurried footsteps that rushed to his bedside was a nail to my temple. He must have suffered, so many of the boys there did.

One day the wailing stopped. My suffering was not over. Other's soon came to replace him, I never found relief there.

I'm feeling stronger now, probably because of the food and the IV and the sleep I've gotten since the surgery. The pain in my leg is still constant but bearable. It is a different kind of pain not as sharp and burning. My hip throbs as I shift to get out of bed. I work to ignore it, I've ignored worse. I just want to get up even if it hurts.

Doctor Cullen says that the best way to get back moving is to start as soon as possible.

I wear a baggy pair of sweatpants Mrs. Cullen left for me low on my hips. They are comfortable but do put some pressure on my healing wounds still they are preferable to a hospital gown.

I grab one of the crutches I've been given. I've decided to use one crutch, I think it's easier. Even if it's not the best way to get around it leaves at least one hand free which I feel is safer.

I use no crutch if that was an option but Doctor Cullen says that it's good to use at least one so I don't put too much pressure on my wounds and my bad leg too fast. It also helps to let people know to give me some space so I don't get bumped or jostled too much.

Up out of the bed, with crutch in hand the question not is where to go? Alice is out, she's out stretching her legs too. She's been exploring the hospital and no doubt talking with people. She likes to meet people. She's said they're are lots of interesting people here, I'll take her word for it. I worry about her when she's not close by but I know she's capable and she was taking care of herself long before we met.

I maneuver carefully over to the window. Looking out I can see it was a pretty substantial drop I took. No wonder I got hurt. The ground is a long way down for a first floor window. I must have truly been out of my mind with fear to have taken that jump in as much pain as I was in.

That worries me. Will it happen again? Dr. Cullen said it had been a bad reaction to some of the medication I was given but what if I really lost my mind. What if I can't control myself during a nightmare? What if I hurt more than just myself next time? I lean against the sill, look out the window and try not to think about it.

I haven't paid much attention to what Washington State looked like yet. Out the window it seems to be damp, foggy and have lots of large old trees. There are little house and shops along a narrow street I can see out the window. Mountains in the distance. It is different then the other places I've been, not bad just different.

"What cha looking at?" Alice bounces through the doorway.

"Just out."

"Out at what?" She asks as she follows my gaze out the window. I don't respond to her question instead I smile at her as she looks back at me. She returns my smile but I think her's is probably infinitely happier.

Safety is an illusion. I just can't help but keep the thought in the back of my head. I know I probably can't keep my worry from her she can see it in my eyes and read it on my face.

I try and I'm trying with her around to let myself feel safe. It's just such a new feeling.

She takes my hand in hers. It's a nice feeling. I like her small hand in mine. I am surprised though when she turns towards me and suddenly her other arm is wrapping around waist. I tense, surprised that she is suddenly hugging me. She hugs me tighter, it's a bit of an awkward hug with the crutch and the stitches to avoid. Still it is nice and I make a conscious effort to relax into her arms.

Tbc...

Author's notes:

Special thanks to Brazos for not letting me forget about this story.

If anyone out there is interesting in being a Beta for this story I am looking for one.

If there are any glaring errors please let me know and I will try to fix them.

I have more for this story, I'm afraid like the first it story I will not be very fast posting or regular.

Thank you for reading.