Logbook

"How do you have so much stuff?" Korra asked as she assembled her sixth cardboard box. With a sigh, she set it down on Mako's desk and eyed her next task. The bookshelf. All of those books weren't going to make it into the box on their own.

"It's not that bad, Korra," Mako called from the bedroom. That at least, she was pretty sure would be an easy task. It wasn't like Mako owned a lot of clothes.

"A few hours, you said. We've been at this for half the day and we're not done yet."

She probably shouldn't blame Mako too much for the delay, most of it had been due to all the stuff Bolin left behind when he joined Kuvira. If there was time, they would have waited until Bolin was in town to help pack, but Mako's lease finished at the end of the week and Bolin and Opal wouldn't be back in Republic City for two. It was up to Mako and Korra to get all of the boys stuff packed up and moved to the new apartment. The apartment that Korra would be sharing with Mako in just a few short weeks.

Korra grinned. Three more weeks and Mako would be hers permanently.

"It would go a lot faster if you didn't stop to complain every twenty minutes."

Rolling her eyes, Korra reached for the books on the middle shelf. She paused.

"Hey, City Boy," she called, "These aren't in any order are they?"

Mako appeared in the bedroom doorway. He tilted his head as he examined the bookshelf. "Not really," he said. "The ones on the bottom shelf are the books that I use for work. Put those in last, please."

"Got it, Team Captain" Korra said.

Mako gave an exasperated sigh as he disappeared back in the bedroom .

Korra started grabbing books and placing them in the box. Not much she would have been interested in. Mostly history or law, though she saw a couple of titles that spoke of Jinora's influence on his reading choices.

He had a whole shelf of books on past Avatars.

Korra couldn't say she was surprised. It was just so Mako.

Her fiancé was a fact gatherer. Of course, he'd dig up as much about her past lives as he could. She'd been pleasantly surprised to find that Mako's insight had drastically improved this time around. Maturity, she'd assumed. No doubt she was right about that, but she suspected this had just as much to do with his improved understanding of her job.

Carefully, she pulled these books off the shelf, trying not to get teary-eyed as she read the titles of the books. Maybe she should read some of these. Granted, she could get firsthand experience if she really wanted to, but it might be nice to get an outside perspective on the events she'd shaped.

Almost hidden between a book on Avatar Aang and the side of the bookshelf, Korra found a familiar little black book.

That was weird.

Not that he'd kept it. Mako saved all of his logbooks.

Korra could see them lined up neatly on next shelf, waiting for her to open a new box for them. Each one filled with his neat, but cramped handwriting. The first page of each he always left blank at first so he could create a sort of table of contents. On the spine of each one was also a small white sticker with two printed dates.

But why was this one here? It wasn't like Mako to put things out of order.

This one wasn't completely full yet. Nearly half of the pages still lay flat and crisp, waiting for writing and coffee stains to warp them. No dates adorned the spine of this book.

Something—a sliver of thicker paper—stuck up from between two of the pages.

Gently, Korra open the book and pulled out the small rectangle.

Korra didn't need to turn it over. The free-spirited handwriting on the back, her own handwriting, told her what it was.

I love you, Korra.

She flipped it over anyways, staring down at the smiling faces. Them. Four years younger and far more innocent. So very different. And yet, in some ways still the same.

No, not the same. She thought she knew what love was then. She'd been right to some extent, but they'd only scratched the surface of that iceberg. Four years—No, the last year alone had taught her so much that she wished she'd known back then. Things might have been different.

Korra smiled, she couldn't really regret the choices they had made though. After all, things had turned out pretty well.

Korra was about to call out and tease Mako about the photo when she looked back down at the little book. Curious, she turned to the first page. A handful of dates and titles (ridiculous titles, she remembered helping Mako come up with the silly names for those cases) had been scratched out. Underneath them he'd written one word.

"Korra".

Not "the Avatar". Or "Avatar Korra". Just her name.

Korra placed the photo on the desk, flipping through the pages of the logbook. All the dates were around the time that they'd dated before, but mixed in with his notes were whole paragraphs about her. The fight with the Equalists. Tarrlok kidnapping her. Moments from some of their matches. The fight with her uncle.

There was a brief period, the two weeks after Harmonic Convergence when they had barely spoken, where the pages were strictly filled with case notes.

The notes changed a little during their trip through the Earth Kingdom. She found her name frequently again, but not like before. What he wrote during their search for the new airbenders was so formal and stilted that Korra would have laughed if she'd hadn't been fighting tears.

All those years ago, during the whole time they dated, Mako had never let her see inside his logbook. She'd hadn't thought much of it then—she assumed it was just boring police notes. Now she understood why. The Mako of four years ago would have been mortified to have his feelings laid out so plainly.

The writing changed one more time.

Paragraphs and paragraphs that she didn't have to read all to know what they said. She just had to look at a few pages to know that they were about her. Everything he remembered about her. Everything he knew. Everything he felt.

"I wish there was something I could do something. I hate seeing her in so much pain. Korra tries to hide it, but I can see it. I think we all can. Su may hove gotten rid of the poison, but it's still affecting her. And there's nothing I can do, even if she would let me. I hate feeling so powerless." An angry scratch made the next few lines illegible. "How selfish is that? I can't even imagine how Korra must feel, stuck in that chair. She hates it. I know she does. She hates anything that makes her feel weak. I wish I could tell her that she's still the strongest person I know. I'm not sure it would help, she'd probably just ignore me. Or yell at me. I wish she'd yell at me...I hope Katara can help her. She'll listen to Katara."

The entries are sporadic after her departure to the South Pole. Mostly details of conversations and events during the trouble with Amon or the six months they'd been together. A few notes about things he wants to put in his letters. He'd written down all of his memories about her, like he was afraid of forgetting them. The last entry was dated just over a year after she'd been kidnapped by the Red Lotus.

"The nightmares are back. I suppose I shouldn't be surprised, considering. I don't think I've ever been so scared. I wonder, should I tell her? She probably has worse nightmares than I do. Maybe she'd like to know that someone understands. No, that's probably stupid. She has her parents and Katara. They'll be more help than I can."

Korra remembered the letter Mako had written the week of that anniversary, it had been uncharacteristically serious and shorter than normal. She'd almost written him back to ask if anything was wrong, but neither Bolin or Asami's letters had hinted at any kind of trouble, so she discarded the idea. Besides, she'd had her own issues at the time.

The nightmares had been bad for her that week too. Worse than normal. She wished she'd known then, (she did now, of course) maybe she would have had the courage to write him. Share the burden a little.

Like they did now.

"Should I be worried that you're so quiet?" Mako asked behind her

Korra jumped, slapping the logbook shut like a teen caught with a trashy novel. Sometimes she hated how quiet Mako could be—especially since he was so oblivious about it.

"No," she said, turning. "Look what I found." Korra held up the photo.

Mako took it from her, a grin breaking out on his face. "I thought I'd lost this ages ago. Where did you find it?"

"In this." She held up the logbook.

Mako's eyes widened. Obviously, he'd forgotten about that or he never would have let Korra be in charge of the bookshelf.

"You wrote about me." She tapped the book with one finger.

"Um, yeah," he said, ducking his head. Hand still on his neck, he glanced at her. "Do you mind?"

Holding the logbook out with a smile, Korra said, "I think you should keep writing."

Mako's fingers folded over hers as he took it from her. "You do?"

"Yes," she said, sliding her arms around his waist. She had to crane her neck to meet his eyes. "People should know who I am. Write it all down."

The hard edges of the book pressed into her lower back as Mako pulled her close and kissed her.

"That's going to be an awful lot to fit in this little book," he said a moment later.

"Guess you'll need to get a few more of those then."

Mako brought his hand to her cheek. "I'd better need a lot more of these."

"That's the plan." Korra rose onto her toes, kissing him again.