Unattainable

He always gave her blue roses.

His name was Kuroba Kaito.

Aoko stared down at the blue rose she received just a while ago, twirling the healthy green stem between her fingers. The boy had left her after his parents came to fetch him and she was left alone by the clock tower again, this time with this blue rose as a companion.

She curled her lips.

When her father finally reached and brought her home, she tried to preserve the rose. But after a day or two, the petals dropped and wilted, much to her disappointment. It was her first gift since she moved to this new town and she never get to keep it as a memento. Not to mention that she might not ever see the boy again, which made Aoko a little sad when she considered that thought.

.

.

After they finally finished packing and settled down for good, her father asked her to bring some cakes to give their new neighbors and Aoko did. When she went to the first house right next to hers, she couldn't believe what she saw when the door opened.

"Hey!" The familiar boy exclaimed.

She was too stunned to say anything else.

The Kuroba family was a nice family. His mother was loving and his father was gentle. When she offered them the cake her father bought, they offered her a nice cup of hot chocolate and lots and lots of sweets and tidbits. She stayed for a very long time before she excused herself since she still had to visit another two neighbors like what her father told her to.

Kaito volunteered to bring her to the next house and she happily accepted his offer.

"The rose you gave me that day wilted." She said as they walked out of his house.

"Really?" He replied nonchalantly. Without another word said, he twisted his wrist and tilted the blue rose towards her disappointed face. Her face immediately brightened up as she took the rose from his soft fingers.

"It's so pretty!"

His smile could rival hers.

.

.

She never thought she could be this angry, but since it involved Kaito, anything seemed possible.

Aoko stormed out of the classroom with her lunch box, ignoring Kaito's repeated shouting of her name to get her attention.

Their Middle school wasn't as big as other schools in the area but Aoko preferred it that way. No need to worry about getting lost in hallways or having to run across the long corridor for her next class. But because it was small, it was more easier to find someone if they were hiding, which was what Aoko sometimes wished that her school was as huge as the castles she read in storybooks.

Even at the most secluded area of the school back yard, Kaito found her sitting at the corner with her untouched lunch on her lap. He approached her without a word and she ignored him, pretending not to see him as she began digging into her food.

"Are you still angry?" He asked.

She closed her eyes and nibbled onto her sausage.

"I promise I won't ever tease you about you and Satoshi being together again, alright?" He said, tone slightly desperate.

"That's not what I'm angry about!" She yelled back at him, mentally cursing herself for not ignoring him for a bit longer.

"Then?" He raised an eyebrow.

She closed her lunch box and set it aside, glancing away. It was obvious that Satoshi liked her and she was trying to avoid the topic at all cost. But Kaito, of all people, had to mention it in front of everyone. And the fact that he could tease her about having a relationship with someone else so jokingly like it wasn't a big deal to him made her feel...

"You won't understand." Aoko mumbled. To be honest, she didn't understand herself either.

He waved his hand and she immediately knew Kaito was up to something. Doves, poker cards, rainbow feathers or maybe apple skins? She didn't know what kind of tricks he would pull on her since he actually turned her hair into a blob of candy floss the last time.

Preparing to give him a punch in his stomach if he ruined her hair again with whatever thing he was going to pour over her head, she blinked in surprise when what appeared was nothing but a blue rose in between his slim fingers.

"Maybe I will never know what are you exactly angry about," Kaito tilted the rose towards Aoko, "but honestly, you look really funny when your face turns red and-"

Aoko grabbed the stem of the rose, feeling the sharp thorns stinging her palm but she didn't care. "Is that an apology because I'm not accepting it!"

He laughed. "Fine fine. I'm sorry alright?" Without an invitation, he sat beside her and picked up her lunch box. "So what do we have here?"

"Nothing for you!"

.

.

"...We're in the same class, again." Kaito stared at the large board that was stationed near the entrance of their High school. Aoko flicked her gaze towards him after she read the rest of her future classmates' names that she would spend with in her second year.

"You sounded like you hate it." Aoko gritted her teeth.

"I do." He nodded his head solemnly.

"Do you think I liked it?!" She waved her fist.

"Here's to another year of romantic mop-chasing in class." Keiko raised her hand like she was holding a small cup of sake. Two of Aoko's friends giggled and raised their arms as well, hands banging onto each other before they drink their invisible sake.

"What are you talking about?!" Aoko exclaimed.

"Gosh you're so loud." Kaito rubbed his ear.

A vein popped on her temple as she swung around and faced Kaito with a growl. But before she could continue shouting in front of the whole school, he swiftly moved his hand and with a soft poof!, a blue rose appeared in between his smooth fingers.

"Here's to another year of us disrupting the peace in class together." He gave a cheeky grin.

A soft breeze blew by, gently lifting all the anger that was boiling within Aoko. Sakura petals continued to fall from a few distant trees, littering all over the front court of the school, but despite all the pink and red that was surrounding them, all Aoko could see was that single blue rose in his hand.

She slowly took the rose from his hand, their fingers brushed but that brief contact was something they were used to. Aoko twirled the rose in her hand and looked up at Kaito who was still smiling at her.

"Here's to another year of us disrupting the peace in class together." She repeated softly.

That sentence sounded ridiculous for her to say, but after it left her lips, Aoko smiled back too.

.

.

"Akiyama-kun gave you this?!"

Everyone's eyes were set on a small brown pot filled with soil and a few blossomed purple Gloxinia growing from it.

"Did he plant it himself?" Keiko asked.

"He said he did." Haruka scratched her chin. "I just couldn't help it. I know we're suppose to have our lunch date as a clique but I thought about bringing it here to let you guys see it."

Sayami nudged onto the blushing girl, giving a teasing look. "Are you sure? Or are you showing it off?!"

"N-no!"

Aoko laughed. "It's really pretty though. If I'm you, I don't mind bringing it around to show it off."

"So how are you going to reply Akiyama-kun?" Keiko giggled.

Reply? Aoko quirked an eyebrow as she looked down at the small pot, her fingers moving gently and she began tracing the white strokes on the purple petal. "Am I missing something? What reply are you suppose to give to Akiyama-kun?"

Haruka blushed even further.

Sayami gasped out loud. "Don't you know the hidden meaning behind the flowers when they are received as gifts?"

Aoko blinked. "Hidden meaning?"

Keiko shook her head, clearly disappointed. "Gloxinia's hidden meaning means love at first sight!" Her eyes lit up again as she pushed her spectacles up her nose excitedly. "Akiyama-kun is confessing his love for her and she brought the flowers to remind us that we don't have any admirers!"

"Keiko! That's not true!"

As Aoko's friends continued their squealing and giggling, she quietly recalled the endless amount of times she received the blue rose from Kaito. She never once thought about the meaning of the blue rose or why he constantly give the same type of rose to her when the last thing he liked on earth was constant.

Kaito disliked constant. He never showed the same magic twice. He never recycle his old tricks to come up with new ones. He never do the same thing because he claimed it would be boring.

All accept for the blue rose.

"Sorry guys, I got something urgent to attend. I'll join everyone for another lunch date, okay?" Aoko grabbed her bag and rushed out of the restaurant, ignoring the stunned looks that her friends gave to her. They couldn't even give her their answers since when they regained back their composure, Aoko was already on the streets.

There were times when she knew Kaito. For instances, she knew that he would give that same kind of silly grin whenever he finished preparing a magic trick. She knew that he loved to ski and hated fish. She knew that he always loved his father, even after he passed away for so many years.

There were times when she didn't know Kaito. She couldn't understand why he defended Kaitou Kid even when he was a criminal. She couldn't understand the number of times he complained about how she was so troublesome but ended up helping her in the end. She couldn't comprehend how he remembered all the little things she said in their conversations and even made the effort to surprise her sometimes just to make her happy once in a while. And until now, she never understand what made him approach her ten years ago, giving her that blue rose under their clock tower.

Their clock tower.

The legs that carried her like the wind stopped as she panted hard, bending slightly forward before she straightened her posture and looked around. Her eyes landed on the metal plate on the brick wall; Kuroba

Why the hell was she doing here?!

Wait. She did leave her friends at the restaurant, but for what reason? All of the sudden, she couldn't remember what made her ran all the way over to Kaito's house. She was just thinking about the times when Kaito gave her blue roses, that was all. But what exactly sent a message to her brain and directed her legs to bring her to Kaito's house like some GPS?

Blue rose.

"Don't you know the hidden meaning behind the flowers when they are received as gifts?"

She wanted to know. She wanted to know the true hidden meaning behind all the blue roses that Kaito gave to her. Easily, Aoko could take out her phone and typed in the search engine Hidden meaning behind blue roses and she would get her answer.

But she didn't because she wanted to hear the answer from him instead. Everything would be clear if she asked him directly. No interpretation, no hidden meaning within a hidden meaning, no mis-communication. Nothing. Aoko preferred it that way.

She slowly turned and made her way towards the front door. Her trembling finger hovered over the doorbell for a few seconds before she jabbed it forward, pressing constantly without stopping even when she heard the door bell ringing loudly within the house. She had no idea how long she had been pressing the bell but it seemed like eternity had passed until the owner finally opened the goddamn door.

"What is it?" He growled impatiently before he widened his eyes, a look of shock appeared briefly before an annoyed look replaced it quickly. "Aoko? What are you doing here so early in the morning?"

"Morning?" Aoko frowned. "It's already lunch time."

"Let me rephrase my sentence." He coughed deliberately as he rubbed his stomach beneath his loose shirt. "What are you doing here and disrupting my sleep?"

"I-" Her mouth opened but there was no voice. She pursed her lips, feeling the heat gathering at the back of her neck and to her face.

Kaito peeled open his lazy eyes, looking genuinely curious.

"B-Blue rose." She mumbled under her breath.

He put a hand to his ear and leaned forward. "Brew hose?"

Aoko stepped back immediately, blushing terribly at the close distance between Kaito and herself. She was never flustered when Kaito stood so close to her so what on earth was happening?! Her mind was in confusion and the fact that Kaito was still staring weirdly at her didn't help.

"Do you want to come in or something?" He stood back, pointing his thumb into his empty house. "Your face's really red. The heat must be getting to you."

"N-No, it's okay! I'm just-" Just what? "Just a little, erm- Oh! I was jogging around the streets and was wondering if you want to join me." Aoko began twisting her waist, stretching her arms back and front.

"I know you're stupid but I never knew you're that stupid to jog in your sandals and dress."

"Is it against the law to jog in sandals and dress?!"

"But it's illegal to trespass people's property and disrupting people's sleep!"

"You shouldn't even be sleeping at this timing!"

"Come on, I expected a better argument than that." Kaito leaned against his door, looking amused. "It's the summer holidays, I can sleep and wake up whenever I want."

"You stupid- Ugh-! Bakaito!" Aoko spun around and was about to leave when a hand grabbed around her wrist, twirling her around. She almost knocked into his chest if she took just one more step closer.

"What's your problem?! Let me go." She twisted her arm in frustration.

"What's your problem?" He tightened his grip, but not tight enough to give her pain. "You can't just ring my doorbell for two whole minutes, tell me a stupid lie and run away after your insulted my name."

"Why did you give me blue roses?!" She finally blurted out the question that was stuck in her throat for the entire time.

That caught him by surprise. He blinked at her carefully and she watched him.

"Why the sudden question?"

"You're not suppose to answer me with another question."

He released his grip and gave a sigh. "What's so important about the rose?" He ruffled his hair, looking bored. "The main point is not about the rose, you know. It's about the trick." He waved his hand and once again, the blue rose appeared between his fingers like the other thousand times.

"The main point is not about the rose."

So all along, she was just clinging onto a pointless hope that there should be some meaning behind the blue rose.

No.

It was all part of imagination.

The reason behind the blue rose was nothing but merely because a rose is a flower and Kaito liked the colour blue; that was how a blue rose came about.

"Is that your answer?" Aoko whispered.

"Are you expecting something else?"

"No." She replied immediately, not even letting a millisecond to take over.

"Then you got your answer." He put a hand on his hips, twirling the rose in between his fingers. With a poof, it was gone. Aoko didn't realize until now that this was the very first time when Kaito performed the trick but she didn't take the rose. Kaito broke her thoughts when he continued what he wanted to say. "So what's for lunch? Are you cooking?"

"No." Aoko repeated. Without waiting for Kaito to say anything else, she turned and calmly walked out of his front yard. It took her five seconds for her to exit his gates, but within that five seconds, she heard nothing from him. Kaito didn't stop her, didn't insult her, didn't question her. She wondered if he was watching her go but she never turn back to confirm her guess.

Aoko didn't dare to anyway; Because if she did and all she could see was the closed front door, her heart might not be able to take it.

She made a turn when she reached the gates and hid behind the brick wall, wiping the tears that gathered in her eyes before she made her way home, with an empty stomach and broken heart.

.

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Kaito twirled the blue rose between his fingers.

When Kaito was seven, he came across this book from a library about all sorts of different flowers and their meanings behind them. He borrowed it, hoping to memorize and understand all of them in order to have something or a knowledge that he could impress his father about.

That was why when he first saw her, standing and looking so lonely under the clock tower, he thought of blue roses.

Back then, she looked so fragile and broken and all he wanted to do was to make her smile and mend her back. He approached her and heard her explain the reason for being all alone by herself. Kaito remembered her mother briefly mentioned about how fate brought her and his father together but Kaito didn't believe it. So he waved his hand, gave her a blue rose and introduced his name even though he knew they would never meet again.

He was enchanted by her smile and he wanted to see them again even though he didn't believe in fate. In awe, she gratefully took the rose that represented his hope for that unattainable love...

...Until she came knocking on his front door a few days later.

He gave her another blue rose when she said the first one wilted. Kaito was more than happy to give her a bouquet if she wanted, but he held back. That first rose signified that hope he held onto about meeting her again and he wanted that feeling to wilt away like how flowers always do. So when he gave the second blue rose to her, he wondered if he should have gave her a sunflower or a daisy instead.

It was weird for a simple girl like her to make him feel this way, even worse than being accused of having cooties.

After he sent her to the next neighbour's house, he walked back home, thinking about how he should avoid her at all cost. Blue rose were hard to harvest and he shouldn't be wasting his time doing such things.

Of course not all things worked out even when planned and he ended up becoming her childhood best friend.

But even when years passed and the number of blue roses he gave her increased, his hope for her love continued to decrease.

When he became the ghost of his father, he didn't dare to hope for whatever love that he wanted to give to Aoko. He didn't even dare to dream if she would ever forgive and see him if she knew the truth. He tried to stop giving her blue roses, a reminder for him to stop making himand her hope, but he couldn't.

He knew a day like this would happen when Aoko charged to his house and demanded an answer about all the blue roses he gave her. It was shocking, really, for Aoko to realize that there was certain meaning behind all the blue roses he gave her only after a decade. But that was the Aoko he knew. So naive, so oblivious, so innocent...

But the only constant thing was change. Time past, people and things changed and Kaito told himself that he shouldn't be surprise with what happened now.

Akako sent him a letter recently, telling him she'd became the greatest witch in history and would not stay in this country any longer, which pleased him because the last thing he wanted was to have her bugging him with creepy black magic and spells. He wanted to write back and tell her that he was happy for her, but there wasn't any return address.

Hakuba became the the second best detective in Beika Town, not like he cared about such pointless ranking even when the magician laughed at him for it. Kaito heard he recently got promoted or something and Hakuba celebrated it quietly with his girlfriend from England.

Then Aoko.

Kaito watched her grew, as if he was her second father. From the childish, naive and silly Aoko to a mature, feminine and calm Aoko. The change didn't happen overnight, but he noticed that the slight distant that slowly grew bigger between them as years passed was one of the cause for her to become who she was. And now, she owned a cafeteria located at the busiest part of the town and even mentioned before that she might open a second one soon.

And him.

The thorn of the blue rose pricked his finger and his chain of thoughts were interrupted. His eyes wavered and focused on the rose again before he placed it gently on the long white table that was piled with many different wedding gifts and cards.

Who was he?

A hand fell on his shoulder. "Kuroba, you're late. It's already time to go in." Hakuba appeared from behind him and signaled his head towards the church.

"I'll be there in a while." He merely said, adjusting his suit's collar as he watched the blonde went ahead of him. All the guests were slowly loitering in and Kaito could see a few more familiar looking faces though he couldn't really bother trying to waste his brain cells to remember them.

Kaito glanced back at the blue rose on the table.

He was just a magician, holding several magic shows in a week across the globe. While he was at it, he would fly around at night in his signature white suit, checking if any jewel that caught his eye would magically glow red under the moonlight.

And just like that, ten years passed and he still hadn't found any jewel that could be Pandora. And so for these ten years, he gained nothing but wasted his youth, time, energy and the most precious thing;

Hope.

Hope against the unattainable love.

Ten years now, there was no more hope left. He had wasted it all.

His hand tentatively reached towards the blue rose and it was gone in a poof. Instead, he pulled out a wrapped box from inside his suit and a permanent market as he messily wrote over his wedding gift.

To Aoko and Takao,
Wish you two a happy and long lasting marriage.
-Kaito

He should never have learnt to hope for any love... it was a gone case before it even happened.

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end

A/N:

In the manga or the old anime, it shows that he gave her normal red roses instead of blue but I'm going to stick to the blue ones in the new series so hehe.
happy endings? of course not haha there is noooo happy endings muhahah