"This may have been a bad idea." Zabuza muttered to himself. "Any chance of you stepping aside and leaving him to me, Lord Fourth?"

"Hm…" Minato paused for a moment, looking between Kakashi and Zabuza. "I might be persuaded."

"What? Sensei?"

"Seriously?" Zabuza raised an eyebrow. "You'd give up your student just like that?"

"I have some issues with my former student at the moment." Minato glared at the fidgeting Kakashi again.

"But I thought you Konohans valued loyalty or something."

"I'm not with them anymore. But tell me, what will you do after you kill Kakashi?"

"Well, I guess kill his students." Zabuza really had nothing to either gain or lose by lying. He was staring down the most powerful ninja Konoha produced since the First Hokage. There was nothing he could do if the man decided to just kill him. There was no way he was faster than the fastest ninja (apparently still) alive, and if even death couldn't stop him, there was no way he was stronger either. "And then the drunken bridge builder. Then go to the short pudgy guy and get my money."

"Uh, excuse me, Lord Hokage?" Tsunami spoke up for the first time. "The 'drunken bridge builder' over there is my father."

"Oh?" Minato looked at the man. "Well then…" He put his hand to his chin, as if considering his options.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Of all the things Minato's trained brain had analyzed in the past few seconds, he never expected the fist of his very angry and supposed to be dead wife to hit him over the head and knock him to the ground.

And if Zabuza was scared before, now, watching this crazy woman with floating hair split in nine parts and glowing eyes glaring down at the dizzy strongest ninja in the world, and the blond man behind her, looking an awful lot like the downed Hokage, staring at the two with crossed arms and an amused look…

Well, he was just… was it too late for him to go home now?

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The trip from Konoha to Wave was quick. Very quick, with Naruto's ability to teleport to his father's location. But he deliberately decided to teleport a couple of miles away, just so he could spend some time with his mother. And if she'd noticed, she kept quiet about it.

They were just walking around through the forest, Kushina holding her son's hand, just talking about random things, both enjoying the first time they spent together since before Naruto could smile properly. Although Naruto did feel a bit like a particularly small toddler as he held his mother's hand. A little bit.

He got over it pretty quickly.

Sadly for the mother-son duo, their short walk was put to an end when they came upon the clearing consisting of Kushina's husband, one of the Seven Swordsmen of Kiri, a woman and an old drunk and Kakashi, her husband's sole surviving student, and the man who did absolutely nothing to try and help her son when he was small. The sight of him angered Kushina, but she didn't know if she should take that anger out on its originator, because of the situation. And her husband was also acting like the blond idiot that he was, so he was always a safe target.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" She asked him politely as she brained him over the head with her fist. She noticed Zabuza take a careful step back, which brought him to the sharp edge of the blade he was standing on. She smiled to herself. I still got it, baby!

"Ow! But Kushina… Wait, Kushina!" Minato jumped up and hugged his wife as tightly as he could, tears in his eyes. All the rage Kushina had just melted away as she did the same in the hug.

"Lady Kushina, please!" Kakashi started to try and win her over, but was stopped before he could really begin by her glare. Lessened, perhaps, by her blush.

"You shut it, scarecrow. I know what you didn't do."

"What does that even mean?"

"I know what it means. And as for you." She turned to Minato. "Stop trying to distract me with your hugs and being happy I'm alive and everything. Did I hear you willing to let the old drunk die?"

"Hey!" The old man complained, to the ignorance of everyone except his daughter, who had went over next to him.

"No, of course not. It was just a joke, I swear."

"Damn right it was." She nodded. "Now go beat the eyebrow-less freak up." She pointed to Zabuza, who cringed.

"Wait, that's not really…"

"You shut up too." Minato, utterly defeated, looked over to his son for help. The little bastard was just laughing at him.

"Fine." He sighed. "Zabuza, I was tempted to let you go, but now I can't. I hope you're happy."

"Wait, what did I do?"

"Wait honey." Kushina raised her hand. Minato stopped, special kunai half-drawn, and turned to look at his wife with a raised eyebrow. "Zabuza, will you betray whoever the hell it is that's paying you to my son?" Naruto waved at the man from behind the couple.

"Um… yes?"

"Good answer. You get to live now."

"Hooray." Zabuza managed a weak fist-pump before the situation finally got the best of him, and he decided that maybe it was better to sit down before he fell down.

"I missed you, Kushina." Minato smiled and brought her into a kiss. Kushina wrapped her arms around him and pulled him closer into it, and he just grinned. She then blushed and hit him in the arm.

Then she started crying, and pulling him and a very surprised Naruto into a forceful hug.

All in all, Zabuza was really happy he decided to bow to the commands of the crazy redhead.

But seriously, home? He'd take the bastard Mizukage over whatever mess he managed to barrel his way into.

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Not all that happy with it, but it'll do for now. Kushina's kinda fun writing, though.

I was considering making the MtG cards for everything Naruto will have access to besides the stuff that already exists. Like the Shinigami, or his parents. I may do that sometime in the future. Or I may default to being lazy and just… not. I'll let the suspense slowly drive you crazy.