Notice: For the ever patient Tineyninja, who requested a Gaikaka drabble. I am very, very, very sorry that this story took so long and it's only a thousand-something long. Sis borrowed my pendrive without my permission and lost it, along with my other fanfics and doujinshis that I have collected for the past year. T.T

Maito Guy was a person you could call by many names – The Blue Beast of the Leaf, Taijutsu Prodigy, Master of The Eight Gates, only son of the famous Black Demon, Maito Dai –but to all of Konoha shinobi, and the inhabitants, only one moniker struck true to his home, and that is the "Lazy Bastard Jounin Who Too Inspirited To Do Anything".

It was a hot Sunday evening, as usual of the climate of the Land of Fire. The streets of the village were mostly empty, as the citizens had chosen to refuge in the comfort of their homes. Shinobi on duty fanned themselves desperately, unable to escape the unbearable heat, wishing quickly for their respective shifts to be over. Even the children seem weary of being outside in this kind of temperature. Only the insane would be outdoors right now.

Unfortunately, Gai already deemed himself mentally unstable a long time ago.

Laying half-sprawled on a tree branch of a particularly tall tree near the gates of the village, Gai scrunched his face into an expression one might called annoyance, gripping a slightly crumpled magazine sideways as he gave it an evil glare. He twisted it ninety-degrees to the left, then to the right, before holding it upside down.

A sigh escaped his lips. No matter how many times he reread the damn paragraph, it still doesn't any make sense. The mystery of why the ever-beautiful heroine of his favourite erotic series, Dreadful Love, decided to choose the broody, mysterious, back-stabbing antagonist instead of the cheerful, loving and heroic protagonist plagued his mind for the past hour, lowering his guard so much that he almost didn't hear the loud footsteps underneath him.

Almost.

Releasing another well-worn sigh, Gai leaned to the left, placed his foot against the oaken trunk with just enough pressure to slide him slightly across the branch, and watched disinterestedly as a white-and-blue blur slammed itself into his earlier spot, face-first.

"Ouch!" The thing wailed silently, cradling its red-tinted face with a pair of gloved hands. Gai returned his attention back to his magazine, barely battling an eyelash at all.

"Why are you here, Kakashi?" The Maito asked sullenly, as his mind continued its useless struggle to understand the female way of thinking. Damn, Saruhiko-chan, what were you thinking?

Kakashi hopped to his feet, grey and red eyes sparkling with the ever-burning fire of Youth, his whole frame trembling as he tried to hold in his excitement. His face –or what you could see anyway- was still red, and he seemed to be oblivious of the welt on his left temple. He held two shaking fists to his chest, before striking a 'Nice Guy' pose. "Why, Gai-kun!" He began by yelling with a loud and exuberant voice, "Aren't we 'Eternal Rivals'? It is only natural for us to engage one another in a series of youth-challenging contests in order to test each other combat's skills, stealth and whats-not! Where is your passion-filled spirit? We should fully take advantage of this sunny, beautiful day to stroke our flames of Youth to its fullest!"

Gai glanced at the panting Kakashi over the pages of his magazine. "Hmm? Did you say something?" He asked.

"Gah! So hip and cool! That's my rival!" Manly ears streaked down Kakashi's masked cheeks, as he threw his hands up into the air in a rather desperate manner. After a couple of moments, he slumped down to the surface of the branch, a cloud of desperation taking over him.

"Neh, Gai-kun," he asked a few seconds later, "Are you busy?" His tone was meek and shy. Soft even.

Gai answered, "Yes, Kakashi, I am busy. Can't you see I'm reading one of men's greatest contributions to life?" He shook his magazine slightly, which had erotic pictures of young women in swimsuits at the front.

It was a full five minutes before Gai, silently impressed that his fellow jounin managed to keep silent for that long, closed his porn magazine shut and paid his self-proclaimed rival his half-attention. Kakashi sniffled, looking at him with puppy-dogs eyes brimmed with unshed tears.

It's super effective!

"What's wrong, Kakashi?" Gai was alarmed, though he kept his cool demeanour outside. Never let it be learnt by others that one of Gai's greatest weaknesses is his annoying silver-haired rival –his biggest one, as a matter in fact. Even if the strongest elite jounin in the Leaf village had the social skills and emotions as about the same of a fucking potato, that doesn't mean that he didn't somewhat care for his comrades.

(Though he did seem to place the Hatake on a higher pedestal than the others of his age group.)

The other jounin lowered his head, eyes downcast as silvery white bangs spilled over his headband in reminiscent of a curtain, covering his face slightly while he bit his lower lip in contemplation, judging by the movement of tiny wrinkles of his dark mask. He looked exhausted, defeated, and empty of the exuberant energy he had shown earlier. Without even knowing it, the Maito scooted closer, wrapping an arm over his comrade's slumped shoulders.

"I had a run-in with Minato-sensei earlier," Kakashi began quietly. He was stopped then with a series of hiccups, his body trembling. But Gai could already guess what had happen.

"What did he say?" Gai's voice was hard; he was usually aloof and docile, a lazy man by nature, but Namikaze Minato made his blood boil like none other, even the mention of his name nearly broke his façade of calmness. He was not alone in this predicament, he knew – Asuma, Kurenai and the others share the same opinion. Even Anko, the most gentle and soft-spoken special jounin, held something other than respect for The Yellow Flash.

Kakashi squirmed uncomfortably; he was soft, too soft, to speak ill of the man of the who once called himself his mentor; Gai grunted unkindly, as the older jounin seem to have no qualms of not doing the same for his only alive ex-student left.

Kakashi muttered gently. "Just the usual." Failure. Moron. Idiot. Useless. Your fault, your fault. Obito died, crushed to death. My prized student. Was going to become Hokage. Sweet Rin, stabbed to death. Stupid technique. Told you not to use it. Didn't listen. Stupid, moronic, failure of a ninja. Go away, go away, go away…

Gai then kneeled gently to his knees. He, with a gentle grasp, pulled Kakashi into his arms. Kakashi whined, head-butting his rival gently against his chin. Gai didn't deterred, jumping down to the ground with the other still in his hold.

"Want to get some ice-cream?" Gai asked. Something to take Kakashi's mind off his mentor's malice. Kakashi shifted slightly; the spandex-wearing jounin could feel him smiling on his arm. "What?"

"I thought you don't like sweet things, my rival." Kakashi nudged his nose against the collar of Gai's jacket. His eyes sparkled slightly with mock accusation, and Gai hid a victory smile behind a cough. He replied, "Well, I also don't like human contact, but look at me, carrying you around in my arms like a rescued princess. Besides," he continued before his rival could defend his manliness, "I think today is a perfect day to get tooth cavity."

"Huh-uh." Kakashi raised an eyebrow in disbelief, even as he squirmed around trying to find a more comfortable position. "Can we get Asuma and Kurenai to come along as well?"

Gah. Socialising. Gai winced slightly, but Kakashi slid in a sad puppy dog face also, and Gai was lost. He agreed reluctantly, but Kakashi's happy face and squeal made up for the pain of it all, and it was all he could ask for.

They were already a couple of kilometres away from Gai's favourite tree when Kakashi yell out in full volume, making Gai almost dropped him. "Wait, Rival!"

"What?" The prodigy asked, half-annoyed at his rival's antics. 'At least he's back to normal…' the green-clad jounin thought.

Both Kakashi's grey and red orbs stared at him wide-eyed. "Gai, you left your porn magazine on a tree!"

Author's Note:

Yes, people. I didn't kick the bucket just yet! School is finally over and I have a couple of months to myself. If I have free time, I shall be updating my stories, providing writer's block and video games do not stop me first.

Damn, I'm getting rusty, and this is the first time I ever written a Gaikaka fanfic, if it could be even call that. I just suck at writing plot, I guess. :L

This story takes place in the Road to Ninja universe, where Kakashi and Gai switch personalities. About the whole Minato thing, when I watch Rtn, it seems to me that Minato was acting cold and uncaring towards Kakashi during their mission, and Minato and Kushina didn't interact with him outside of the mission at all. Now, I just thought that the real Minato would have treated Kakashi a bit...friendlier, I guess? As Minato was very concern about Kakashi after Obito's and Rin's deaths, as shown in the ANBU Kakashi arc, I think Rtn!Minato would have reacted completely opposite such as blaming Kakashi for their deaths, hence the whole cold-shoulder thing because Rtn! Minato doesn't completely act as canon Minato. Kakashi could only depend on Gai, Asuma and Kurenai.