Warnings for depression, also blood

Epilogue: When Things Become Brighter

By the time Luna woke up, I had managed to limp off of the broken battlefield. Yuki hadn't stirred once and it had been difficult to get her on my back with just one arm. I managed though. I always managed. It was nothing new.

By the time Luna was even able to talk, the power had long since worn off. That last burst of energy I had pulled from thin air was nothing more than a very vague wisp of Soul. In its place was a raw, gnawing hunger that was nothing more than chewing on my stomach acid. Every step stung the soles of my feet. I think they had been burnt somehow. There was a sharp sting in my tailbone. But all of these pains were nothing compared to the ache in my head and chest. My head felt like the consequences of drinking as described by my father and my chest felt utterly cramped.

I think I left my beating heart behind me though, so maybe that was good compensation.

"What happened?" Luna finally managed. "Did you win?"

"Everyone won," I managed to say. "But me. Everyone lost too."

Luna swallowed. "I'm sorry," she finally said. "I should have woken up."

"Don't," I replied, still limping. "S'over Luna. Nothin' we can do."

Luna went quiet and I'm glad she did, because if she had spoken, I would have stopped walking and started crying. I would have broken down and woken up my sister, and I couldn't risk that. I was pretty sure this was the most sleep she had gotten since she had been kidnapped. Even if it was filled with nightmares, I didn't want to interrupt her.

That dragon I had beaten up, that had been her, hadn't it? A little girl, lost and scared and hurt, being controlled by what was probably nothing more than a kid jumped up on how much the world sucked. I had beaten the snot out of them, and my babies paid the price.

This wasn't a battle we could afford to lose and we hadn't. I don't know if there's a euphoria I should be feeling though. If anything, I should be happy it's over.

I guess I'm that.

Yuki moved on my back. "Don't squirm," I said. "I'll drop you if you do."

She froze. "Sis?"

"Mm," I agreed. It was a good answer, right? "How are you feeling?" She didn't answer and I didn't try to pretend that was fine. "I thought so," I said, continuing to walk. The path I had taken here had made a few sharp turns, maybe this other way was a straight shot towards Darkmoon. Really didn't want to think of what that meant.

She sniffled and it was loud in the quiet air. The Digimon I had seen in this place, few as they were, were keeping their distance. Smart move. Luna could eat them and likely would before I could want to say no. She sniffled again. "I could have killed you, "Yuki said after her sniffles had become full-blown sobs.

I shook my head. "Probably not." Not that that was any comfort but still. "I'm too stubborn." Luna said nothing. I love her so much.

"You're crazy is what you are," my sister replied from against my neck. "I'm so sorry, Nee-san… I killed them, I'm so sorry. They're gonna lock me up just like mom and-"

"Yuki, they are not gonna lock you up," I almost snapped, feeling her trembling getting worse and worse until she was making me shake. "You're ten. They're going to do what they did for me. You'll go to therapy and get some community service hours. You'll stay with dad and maybe be a tamer one day if they want you. But for now, go back to sleep. There's nothing we can do and I forgive you anyways."

There was nothing for me to forgive, not really, but I knew she had to hear it from me. I am the big sister. I had to be the one to take the deep breath and be good, even if I was a failure at that the rest of the time.

When we made it out, I found myself blinking light from my eyes at the sight of the Gate Area. It was full of busy people, who were holding down limp Light Fang or carrying injured fellows. The sounds came rushing into my head next, filling it like a cracked gourd and spilling out. I almost collapsed. Someone could hold onto Yuki now. I needed to be home, in my bed, in pain. I couldn't bear with this.

Thankfully, a thin, but tall figure scooped us into one hug. Yuki started to bawl. I relaxed. "Nice timing dad."

"I have it sometimes." He scanned us with narrowed eyes. "Julia and Glare are waiting in Union Room. Might be best for you to get it over with, Sayo. I'll take Yuki to a medical area."

Yuki's fingers curled into what was left of my jacket, but when dad pulled her away like she weighed nothing more than a sack of apples, she went. My shoulders sagged, sending new pain up my neck. "Thanks dad."

He squeezed my shoulder with one slim hand. "Always lass."

I locked up my tears and started limping again. I didn't even care that I was hauling ass onto a teleportation pad, twice. It didn't matter to me. Either I was too sick or too empty. Either one.

Darkmoon was bustling, the quick snap of boots and heels the only idea I had that people noticed me. Many were stopping their work to salute me, I realized as I limped. Either news traveled fast, or I had been being watched this whole time. Or, which was probably what happened, Koh went screeching down the city and spread the rumor I was doing something heroic. Fucking idiot.

Still, the thought brought a smile to my face. A weak one, but it existed.

"Get back to work," I croaked, because we shouldn't be saluting when we're supposed to be working. There were wry snorts, but then someone moved to support my not-hurt arm.

"You'll fall if you're not careful," Spike mused. "You're lucky I'm going the same way." I was too weary to tell him to just admit he was being nice and leaned on him instead. "How bad was it?" he finally said.

"Luna's alive."

"I'm sorry."

I let the tears trail after me, mixing with the droplets of blood that were falling after my dragging feet. "Me too. I think I killed a kid. Or three."

"We'll take care of it. Or we'll try anyway."

It was almost a promise, but it wasn't strong enough for that. IT was just a reminder, an affirmation of CITY youth. We take care of our own. Not always first, but we do. I clenched a fist to prove I was still listening, despite my body mainly focusing on breathing.

He laughed. "That's it."

At the sight of the Union Room portal, I pushed off of him. He raised an eyebrow and I showed him bloody teeth. It was getting worse, yeah, but I had some pride left. I was a Tamer, and I couldn't face my kids if I couldn't make it into a room with my head held high on my own. He rolled his eyes and went first.

Thankfully I lived in a place where everyone heard mixed shouting and braced for an attack so when I entered the room myself, there was none of that. Instead, I was greeted by soft reverence of some kind and unmasked emotional relief. I think a couple of those scientists were Light Fang, they looked so dead eyed. I didn't look for too long, thinking of Kenpa and Pulsa.

My legs almost gave out when I made it up the ramp. I felt Dorothy's solid arms grabbed a hold of me. "I heard you," she whispered in my ear. "I heard it."

I tried to snort. "Dory, there are children present. Keep it PG."

"I'm relatively certain that's as close as we're getting to PG." Koh moved to my other side and the two of them hauled me into a chair. My body screamed but I ignored it. I'd like to lay down but I would take what I could get.

"Good work, Sayo." I looked to Julia. She stood stiffly beside Glare, with Duke beside her. I grimaced. All of us had been under the Chrono Core thing at some point, except me. I had no idea what had gone on there, but judging by the way Julia stood, and how Dorothy was on the opposite side of Glare, none of it was pretty.

I thought of Glare's coherency and Alec's laughter, and looked down.

"Thanks," I said after a few minutes.

"It's a hollow victory for you," she said in her most gentle voice, the one that had reached my mind when it was fraying before Resistor Jungle. "But you saved a lot of people. Your sister will be okay."

I swallowed. "Yeah."

"We saw you," Koh offered by way of distraction. "No idea how, didn't make much sense, but we saw you fighting him. And when he evolved like that, well… we had to do something. Really would have rather just teleported over there, to be honest."

"Which is dangerous," Julia pointed out as Glare opened his mouth. HE closed it and Koh smiled.

"Well, yeah, that was the idea."

Newton snickered. "You might not be as bad as I thought."

"Was that a compliment?"

They laughed. It hurt too much to laugh, and the sound rang hollow anyway.

Julia moved from her spot, reaching into the pocket of her commander's jacket. "For your effort," she began, with that measured voice she probably only used on Platinum Tamers. "For your courage, for their sacrifice-" She pinned a small, twisted medal onto my jacket, leaving a space between it and the golden pin. "This is the honor we give those who fight on the earth to the end. Also, from our union with Directory-" She pulled out a small pendant, carved crystal and stone that looked like a miniature sword. She put the chain about my head. "One of the weapons that symbolizes the continuation of harmony, the sword of moonlight." She stepped back and smiled at me.

I blinked back at her. My head was fuzzy with cotton. "Thanks."

She nodded. "Dorothy, Koh, take her home."

Dorothy saluted and Koh nodded, both looking all too eager to get the fuck out of the room. The fanfare probably began right after we left. I wasn't sorry I missed it. I went home and slept for like a week. My Tamer Home was locked. I wouldn't have answered it anyway. I dreamed of my Digimon, of Yuki, of my mother, of snippets of something I couldn't actually see too well.

Then I woke up. Things had changed, I had changed. But life still went on and I had no choice but to stay on with it.

Every day after that week of sleep I would wake up, hoping the eggs I had made out of scan data would be sitting on the floor, or by the beach, or next to me on the bed. They never showed up. I had my Pabus, Luna, and all my little babies who were growing with my indirect supervision. They had to be enough for me. My family had to be enough for me.

As per my babies' last wish, I just had to keep trying to do as they wanted of me: to live.

I was just going to have to try.

A/N: Wow it's done. It's like, actually finished hot damn. Okay, so real talk. I had this story ending almost planned completely since the early chapters, before a sequel was even in my mind, this was roughly the place where the fic was going to end up. I had never started hoping for the 'Sayo magically gets better, possibly because of an SO who cures her mental illness' because that's just not what happens (thank you for saying so Kumo) and because this isn't pretty. She's not a character who is ready for anything more than baby steps, and she's not even ready for that. Now, I didn't know that all of chapter 42 was going to happen, but I knew character death was incoming because of the world I had envisioned CITY to be, and we're only at the tip of the iceberg here. If you've read any of the sidestories (which have a few spoilers, but not much), you will understand what I mean.

Special thanks to OnixflametheBlue for allowing me to poke my way into his ZH universe (everyone check it out, it's a much more humorous ride than The Open Sky is, at least on the surface) and shoutouts to remi because she said 'go for it', which is always a mistake with me, fair warning. To all of you who have favorited and followed recently, um, thank you, wow. To be honest, I didn't expect this to go much of anywhere because of the quiet nature of the gameverse. Because of that, I am humbled by the lot of you.

So! I said sequel. Yep, Sayo's story is not over yet. No, tune in on January 1st to see her again in the sequel When the Stars Gleam, which takes place about two years after Moon. So, our hero is older, maybe wiser, and the world we're in is about to get a whole lot bigger. Keep your eyes peeled! Thanks so much everybody!