Derek,

I want to start off by telling you that you are the love of my life. You are the only man that I will ever love and the only one that will ever hold my heart.

We started drifting apart many months ago and as much as I try to figure out why, I can't. Gone was the flirty banter, our movie nights, lunches, just seeking each other out when we needed one another. I guess it was selfish of me to think you would always be here. I guess I was foolish to believe your words when you would tell you always would be.

That night two months ago was the most amazing night of my life. I thought finally my dreams were coming true. I stupidly thought you wanted me that way. How wrong I was. It wasn't my intention to sleep with you that night. I'm not even sure how it happened but it did. I don't know if you meant all those words you whispered that night, oblivious you didn't. I meant every word that I whispered to you. When you told me the next morning that the night before was a mistake and that you were going to propose to Savanah, you shattered my heart.

We started drifting away farther from each other and we just stopped talking all together. We only spoke when we needed to. If I had known that by us sleeping together would ruin what little we had left, I never would have let it happen. I don't blame you because both of us participated that night.

In Savanah you finally found the woman you want to spend the rest of your life with and I am happy for you. She's smart, beautiful, caring, and above all, she loves you. I only ever wanted your happiness and I'm only sadden by the fact that it wasn't with me.

I debated long and hard whether to tell you or not. I didn't want you to hate me if I didn't tell you but I also don't want to ruin your life now that you are finally happy. I knew that I had to tell you. The day you announced your engagement to the team, is the day I found out I was pregnant. Before you ask, yes the baby is yours. I'm sorry I never meant for this to happen. I was on the pill and we used condoms. But it happened nonetheless. I thought you had a right to know.

By the time you read this I will be gone. You won't find me, I know how to disappear. Again, I didn't mean to ruin your life. I will let you know how the baby is doing and when it gets closer to my due date which is February 14, ironic isn't it, I will be back so you can attend the birth of your baby. If you don't want to be there, I will understand. I don't expect nothing from you but I will never deny you access to your child.

I didn't tell anyone I was leaving or the reason why. This will be a shock to everyone but I couldn't say goodbye because you would try to convince me to stay. I'm not doing this to hurt you but I need to do this for me.

I don't regret that night and I never will. Look in the other envelope, please.

I love you,

Penelope

Derek sat stunned at his desk. Penelope was gone and she was pregnant with his baby. He looked at the second envelope and opened it. Inside was an ultrasound picture of what looked like a jelly bean. He turned it over and it read: Your baby's 1st picture. Looks like a jelly bean! He turned it back over and leaned back in his chair. He picked up her letter and reread it again. He put the letter and picture in the same envelope and went straight to Hotch's office. He knocked on the door and was told to come in. He handed the envelope to Hotch and he looked at Derek before he took. He took the letter out and then read it. When he was done he looked at the ultrasound. He glared at Derek.

"So you are the reason she left. I get here at 7 and there is a letter in my inbox that is telling me that Penelope quit and that a new tech analyst was being assigned to the team. How could you let this happen?"

"I didn't know she was pregnant or that she would leave.'

"Maybe not but you knew how much she loves you and you slowly started drifting away from her. What did you think would happen when you announced your engagement to Savanah?"

"I didn't think she would react like this."

"You knew. You wouldn't be the profiler you are if you didn't."

"So now what?"

"According to her letter, she's off the grid. You won't be able to find her if she doesn't want to be found. She said she would let you know how the baby's doing but she didn't mention she would tell you how she's doing. What do you think this is doing to her?"

"I don't know."

"She's having your baby, something she has always dreamed about but she's going to do it alone because she wants you to be happy."

"How can I be happy when I know Pen is out there somewhere going through this alone?"

"Have you thought about what you are going to tell Savannah?"

"No, I'm barely trying to wrap my head around this."

"Well she said she would contact you closer to her due date so you have some months to get used to the idea that you are having a baby with your former best friend."

Derek flinched at those words and left Hotch's running to Pen's office. He got there and the door was open. He turned on the light and all her personal things were gone. All the things that made it Pen's, well Pen's lair, was gone. He sat on the couch and let it sink in that his Baby Girl was gone and along with her, his baby.