Note: This story is posted on AO3 under "WHATfantasy." That's me. It's all good. :)

Not Alone

She was nervous. Of course she was nervous.

Relationships of any kind were still murky territory for her, despite all the time she's had to stew and brood and grumble over the few experiences she's had. And all the ones she's had, well, they were with one man. Most of the complications, in other words, came out of her own clumsy people skills and inability to feel completely secure with her partner.

This was different, though. It was treacherous territory in an already-unfamiliar land. The avalanche of hang-ups and emotional back-and-forth wasn't just in her head alone: no, it was creeping in from all sides.

Her job, so to speak, was to bring balance wherever she went. She knew that. For most of her life, she had been determined to follow that directive to the letter, even if it meant sacrificing her personal life. She'd always wondered why she found it a relatively easy sacrifice to make: breaking up with Mako had been rough, sure, but she got over it. Her job came first and it hadn't been hard for her to make her peace with that fact.

But, again, this was different. She was running away. She was running away with another woman and, in simple terms, she was more than a little conflicted. And insecure. And worried. And… hopeful. And nervous.

Asami Sato. The woman was like a riddle: the message is hidden in plain sight, but the clues have so many potential meanings that it's almost impossible to know if you've guessed right.

Okay, so, they were holding hands as they walked toward the spirit portal. Big deal. Girls hold hands all the time. It was normal.

… Right?

It wasn't like Korra had a wealth of knowledge to draw from. Asami was the first female friend she'd ever had, so how did she have any way of knowing if all their little touches and hugs were supposed to signal something deeper? It was just as easy to assume that she was projecting her limited understanding of romance onto all their friendly interactions. It was just as easy to assume that she was, in a word, confused.

She had no idea how she was supposed to act around Asami. She had no idea how she was supposed to feel. It wasn't easy for her to admit it, but she knew that she trusted Asami so much more than she trusted anyone else in their little circle of friends. It just felt good to talk to her and tell her things she wouldn't normally tell other people. Maybe that was simply because Asami was another woman.

Or maybe it was because Asami was the kindest, loveliest, most dependable soul Korra had ever met.

Hers was a relatively straightforward dilemma: It felt good to hold Asami's hand. It felt good to hug her. It felt good to talk to her. It felt good just to be around her. And, worst of all, she was just so damn pretty.

Asami was gorgeous, magnificent, stunning… and all those other lofty adjectives Korra couldn't recall just this second. It was hard to think straight, after all, while that very woman was looking down at her like that, as if she'd never seen something so precious before. They were facing eachother, their hands clasped tight like they were holding some delicate secret between them, and Asami's gaze was so tender and the whole world was literally fading all around them. If either of them were a man, Korra knew it wouldn't take a genius to acknowledge that destiny was basically screaming in their ears.

But they were both women and Korra was completely out of her depth. Her inner conflict couldn't defy gravity, though, no matter how much it insisted it should. And that's what was between them: gravity, an irrefutable and irresistible pull. When everything boiled down—Korra's insecurities, inexperience, closet-skeletons, and all the rest—one thing was inescapable: she liked Asami.

Really liked Asami.

Really, really liked Asami.

Like, as more than friends. A lot more than friends.

One half of her insisted she was crazy, the other half insisted she wasn't. She wanted to listen to that other half, the one that said Asami's minute step closer to her meant something. And that the way her head turned, only just a little, as if to ask an intimate question, meant something. And that her lips, parted ever so slightly, as if in preparation for a kiss, meant something.

The moment felt like an eternity even though it actually passed in less than two seconds. Then they were safe and sound in the Spirit World and still the last thing Korra wanted to do was let go of her.

But she didn't want to scare her. Or overstep the boundary she wasn't seeing. Or be forced to admit she was wrong… and confused.

So she started loosening her grip and pulling away, and Asami's face fell, just a little, as if she were steeling herself for whatever came next. And then Korra could swear she'd had the wind knocked out of her when Asami suddenly rushed forward and pulled their bodies into a tight embrace, though if that was from shock or elation, she couldn't say. Didn't stop her from hugging back, though. "Hey…" she fumbled. Man, she was so out of her league.

"Are you okay with this? I mean… really?" Asami's voice was kind of muffled from her face being pressed against Korra's neck.

That couldn't be normal friend behavior. It couldn't. Normal friends-who-are-girls wouldn't let their lips get so close to your jaw like that.

… Right?

"Why wouldn't I be?" Her arms were snug around Asami's waist, just below her backpack and distractingly close to her backside. Korra could already feel her cheeks burning. She was afraid to think those kinds of thoughts, especially while in Asami's actual presence. Her solitary nights were already plagued by embarrassingly-vivid fantasies.

"I don't know. I guess I'm just…" She trailed off, though, and didn't finish the thought. "You should probably be doing a million other things, Avatar."

"Says Mrs. Future Industries, basically married to her work." Korra smiled at her tease.

"They can live without me for a while. I laid all the groundwork before we left."

Asami's breath was tickling her skin and it was all she could do to not squirm or let her knees buckle. This was bad. The whole thing had gotten so out of hand for her. "Asami, there's… nowhere else I'd rather be."

Was that too forward? Too bold?

"That's sweet." Asami released her slowly and stepped back, but not far. Not far enough to stop touching her, though it was only with her hands lightly holding Korra's forearms. Did friends do that? Or at least, did they do that this often? Did they then offer that same lovely tender look that always made Korra's insides turn to mush? "I feel the same way."

She felt like a boiler. Or a pit of lava. Or the sun. Her face was so damn hot and it was only getting worse.

But Asami was blushing too.

She wanted to be bold. She smiled instead. "Well we're… here… so…" She gestured in some random direction, at a general loss for words and wanting to kick herself. She could face down maniacal criminals, ancient demons, anarchists, and evil dictators, but she couldn't face being wrong about Asami. She couldn't.

"So we are." Asami stepped away and finally lent her attention to their surroundings. They were in that same meadow that Korra had landed in with Kuvira. It looked prettier than she remembered, though… or maybe it was just the woman striding ahead of her. "It's funny. I finally get to go to the Spirit World and I'm not even looking at the scenery." Her hands clasped elegantly behind her back, Asami turned just far enough to smile and wink at Korra from over her shoulder.

Was she faint or just dying? Korra didn't know, but she was pretty sure she could feel the world shifting all around her. All the flowers in the meadow took on a riot of colors in response to the riot of emotion bursting inside the Avatar, to whom the Spirit World was well-attuned. Curious spirits began to follow them as they walked. And was the sky… bluer somehow?

It only got worse when Korra heard Asami's exclamation of delighted surprise. Now trees were popping up as if to… give them some privacy. Crap. She clenched her teeth and tried not to… feel so much, but it was useless.

"This is amazing! Does the landscape always just change randomly?" Asami slipped her arm in Korra's, linking them together.

This was so unfair. No one's smile should be that disarming.

"Uh…" She didn't want to lie to Asami… but she didn't want to tell her the whole truth, either. Or rather, she did want to, but even thinking about it left her tongue-tied. But she couldn't lie. No way. "Uh… well not… not randomly, no."

"Are you doing it?"

Damn it, it was like she'd deduced everything Korra wasn't saying in under a second flat. "Not… directly. It… it uh…" She was a disaster. One slip of the tongue and she'd indirectly pour her heart on her sleeve.

"Hey." They stopped and suddenly they were all close and tender again while the world kept rioting around them. "What's wrong?"

She had so many questions and no one to ask. There was no one to ask but Asami herself, and that, she just couldn't bring herself to do. It would hurt too much to lose her, especially over an awkward misunderstanding.

Pile that with what their friends might think and what her parents might think and what the world might think—Were there other women who like women this way? Was she alone?—and it was easy to see why she'd rather just dance around the issue instead of address it.

She knew she could just ask Asami not to touch her so much, maybe blame it on a personal space thing, but she couldn't bring herself to do that either. She didn't want to deny herself her one tiny reprieve in all this mess. "I'm fine." She smiled as she spoke. She needed to put on a brave face, now. She needed to be smart and responsible about this.

But Asami wasn't so naive. They didn't call her a genius for nothing. "You know you can tell me anything, right? I mean it. I don't care what it is."

Intimate was an understatement, but it was the best word she had for them. She'd been intimate with others before, but no one had ever touched her mind quite like this, not to the point that even a simple expression of trust could send her soaring.

And then there was the physical closeness again and… she'd have given anything to know what Asami really thought of her. Friendly or flirtatious? That was what she wanted to ask.

But she couldn't. Wouldn't. "I wanna tell you about the Spirit World. We're surrounded by some pretty incredible things right now and I'd be a terrible Avatar if I didn't try and explain some of it… Though," she laughed at herself, "Jinora could probably tell it better."

Those green eyes studied her for one more brief, silent moment. In the end, though, Asami was smart enough to drop the subject. "You never know. You might surprise yourself."

"We'll see!" Korra then took Asami's hand and resumed their walk. Maybe it was a dumb idea, but she had no other way of telling her I'm sorry, It isn't you, You're my best friend, But I like you so much more than that, Please just read my thoughts and kiss me first because you're actually interested and I'm not crazy.

It was warm enough that they didn't need a fire and the stars were bright enough that they didn't need to worry about visibility. Since she had entered the Spirit World with her actual body, she still had her bending. It was especially useful now since she was trying to heal a scrape on Asami's knee.

"I feel like a kid again," the older woman laughed, "climbing trees and falling out of them. I haven't done that in years."

"Probably wasn't the best idea to do that in the dark," Korra teased.

They'd wandered into some kind of forest and decided to stop for the night once they'd found a clearing.

"But I had you to catch me. Thanks for that, by the way."

"Oh… y'know… I've always wanted to save a damsel in distress." The scrape was healed. Korra just didn't want to move away, and Asami wasn't stopping her, even after the water splashed into the grass.

Asami didn't even move to put her pants back on. She just kept on talking and giving Korra a full view of her bare legs, which were made even lovelier by the starlight. Her fingers itched to reach out and brush the other woman's skin.

"You've probably saved more damsels and dudes than you even know of. I'm just one of many." She smiled.

"But you're the only one I want to be with." The words tumbled out before Korra could realize how Asami might interpret them, or how they might sound in general.

Asami's eyes widened and she leaned forward slightly, as if she were trying to reaffirm what she just heard.

Korra's whole face was burning up and mortification churned in her guts. "I—Sorry I mean around. Be around. Sorry if that sounded… weird…"

"Oh." She shifted her weight and folded her legs beneath her.

Korra rose to her feet and pulled a blanket from her knapsack, just needing something to do with her hands. She blew it. Damn it. Now everything was awkward and Asami was going to ask where the nearest exit was. She knew how fake her little correction had sounded, and Asami wasn't stupid.

She almost didn't hear Asami say: "I… wouldn't have been offended, you know."

Sitting there in the grass, her bare legs tucked beneath her, her admission hanging in the air between them, she looked so vulnerable. Korra could have done anything just then: she could have taken the opportunity to set firmer boundaries. She could have cut their weird behavior out entirely. She could have done the smart thing, the safe thing.

But hope flared in her chest so hot and full it was almost painful… Either that, or she was having a heart attack. She couldn't say for sure. But Asami was throwing a bone and, right now, Korra was the proverbial polar bear dog. If ever there was a time to bite, it was now.

She twisted her blanket in her hands. "You mean… if I had meant…?"

"Yes." Her answer was so firm, so completely resolute. It was kind of unbelievable. Here was this non-bender woman in the Spirit World, and still she was much braver than the supposedly-mighty Avatar.

The silent tension, as the two went about setting up their modest bedding, was so thick Korra swore she could slice it with a knife. She didn't know what to say or what to think. She didn't want to overthink. Maybe Asami was just trying to be nice.

Maybe she wanted Korra as much as Korra wanted her.

They were right next to each other, after all. Close enough to reach out and touch hands, though they didn't. There was something in the air, something heavy and unavoidable.

It wasn't going to go away unless she said something. She had to ask: "Is that… something that women do?"

Asami was studying her so intensely. "Yeah… Hasn't it ever crossed your mind?"

Oh it had. It had more than she'd have liked to admit. Most of those thoughts involved Asami in unrepeatable situations. Her cheeks grew warmer just thinking about it. "I grew up with the White Lotus. When I say I'm inexperienced, I mean it."

"So… not at all, then." And then, all of a sudden, everything about Asami's expression and tone of voice seemed very neutral, very guarded and noncommittal. She hadn't seemed like that just a second ago.

Korra's heart started pounding in her chest. Was Asami trying to cover up for something?

Was she afraid, too?

She could feel her pulse in her wrists. "I said I didn't know how common it was. I didn't say I never thought about it on my own."

"It's… not unknown in society, though not everyone is nice about it. Advocacy is at an all-time high these days, though, especially in the United Republic." And suddenly the neutrality was gone again, and the intensity had returned to her features. She sometimes looked like this when playing a game of Pai Sho, Korra realized. She was strategizing. "Future Industries is outspoken in its support."

But Korra was awful at Pai Sho. She wasn't a strategist and she wasn't good at handling situations delicately. She was the boar-q-pine in the china shop, and she didn't quite know how to pick up where Asami left off. "Uh that's… good." Damn it. "So do you… uh…" Damn it, damn it, damn it. "Have you ever—"

"I do. I haven't ever… acted on it, but I've always known. It's the mind that matters to me, the spirit. Male and female are each beautiful in their own way." Leaning up on one elbow, all lit up by starlight, Asami was breathtaking. And now, Korra knew, she was… possible.

Maybe Korra wasn't delusional, after all.

So… Korra let herself be the boar-q-pine. She sat up and let it all pour out: "Well I think you're beautiful. You're the most intelligent, genuine, compassionate woman I've ever met and I've had a thing for you since basically… ever. But I'm really nervous and I don't know what to do and I really, really need you to tell me if all our touching and hugging is really something else because if it is then I—"

She was cut off when Asami all but crashed into her and pressed Korra against the bedding and kissed her. She was kissing her!

And it was… well, she didn't have the words. The heat shooting through her was relentless and her heart felt like it was going to punch a hole through her chest. And Asami… she felt so damn good, all soft curves instead of hard angles and gentle sighs instead of low grunts.

She was dizzy. Everything was spinning all around her—actually, since they were in the Spirit World and all, that probably was happening—and Asami Sato was on top of her, showing her what her wildest dreams felt like.

Asami pulled away after a moment, but not by much. She was smiling. "I've liked you for a long time, too," she said quietly against Korra's lips. "Though I never thought we'd actually end up like this. I'd figured it was just…" she twirled a strand of Korra's hair, "wishful thinking."

Leaning on an elbow above her, all moonlit pale skin and shiny wavy black locks, Asami was a vision. Korra gulped, tongue-tied again. Wasn't she supposed to be all suave after the first kiss? That was how it went… right?

And what happened to the blabbermouth she'd been just a minute or two ago?

Talk about wishful thinking. "Yeah I…" she fumbled. "I'm just glad I'm not… I don't know… crazy?"

Asami took a moment to kiss her again before replying. She was smiling against Korra's lips, and everything about her just felt so right. "Same here."