Throughout the week Zoro found himself agonizing over daily texts and snapchat messages from Sanji. The blond sent multiple teasing selfies of himself around his home - usually scantily clad in only thin boxers - and even a few of himself at work; his diving suit partially unzipped so it hung loose from his hips and left his bare chest exposed, displaying his gleaming, wet skin. Frankly it was ridiculous how sexy Sanji was without even trying, (although Zoro suspected that the cheeky bastard was deliberately tormenting him). Zoro on the other hand was a mess. Every time, he rewrote his replies to Sanji's clever and smartass texts over and over, doing so, so many times, that in the end he got fed up and resigned himself to short, boring answers. Snapchat was even more stressful. He hated every picture he took of himself, and he was far too embarrassed to go through with sending any selfies with his shirt off - no matter how many damn, suggestive winky emojis Sanji sent. He wished that they could just meet up and talk; so when the blond mentioned that the aquarium needed volunteers to help with an event, Zoro was quick to offer help...

"Can I use the milk?"

Kuina just sneered at him in response, and Zoro sighed in annoyance as she pushed the plastic gallon further out of his reach along the surface of the large, kitchen island. Gritting his teeth to prevent himself from snapping at her in irritation, Zoro slid off his wooden barstool and marched around to the other side of the island to get the damn milk himself. Kuina pointedly ignored him the whole time as he retrieved the half-empty gallon and returned to his seat to pour its contents over his bran cereal.

He knew exactly why his sister was being such an insufferable bitch today. Kuina had a judo match later, and it was the family tradition to go cheer each other on whenever any of them was competing. Only this time Zoro wasn't going. He'd told them all at dinner last night that he had volunteered to help Sanji out at the aquarium's barbeque fundraiser, and that he wouldn't be able to make the competition. After a moment of stony silence, Kuina had blown up into a full blown fit - screaming ugly names at him and accusing Zoro of letting his new 'fling' come between him and family. She crossed the line when she cruelly pointed out that it was only a matter of time before someone like Sanji got fed up with Zoro and found a guy less pathetic to be with - if he hadn't already. Zoro hadn't been able to keep his temper in check after that, and the two of them had ended up on their feet in a insult-laden shouting match by the table until Mihawk had physically dragged the two of them from room. Their father had thrown them onto the couch and proceeded to deliver the most terrifying lecture of their lives with his favorite fencing sword in hand as Koshiro tried to comfort a wailing Tony back in the dining room.

Obviously, Kuina was still pissed.

Zoro understood the pressure that she was under; he really did. This match was important for her USA Judo ranking, and ultimately her position in the IJF. If she lost this match it could be another four or more years before she would be ranked high enough to try out for the women's Olympic team. However, her anxiety over today's match didn't give her license to be an ass about him missing the match, and he sure as hell wasn't going to coddle her shitty attitude by bailing on Sanji. Especially since she had never apologized for the shit she'd said. He hadn't either, and so he finished his breakfast without saying another word to her; flicking through the photos on Sanji's Facebook profile on his phone.

"Are you kids ready?"

Zoro shrugged one shoulder in reply to Koshiro's soft question and tucked his phone into his pocket before turning and sliding off his stool, "Sure, whatever."

Koshiro gave Zoro an unimpressed look at his short tone, and he ducked his head apologetically as he grabbed his dirty dishes, "I just need to grab my sneakers. Do you want me to check on Tony?"

His dad's eyes crinkled at the corners behind his glasses as he smiled slightly, "Thank you, Zoro."

Taking his dishes to the sink, Zoro watched as Koshiro sat down on the stool beside Kuina and rubbed her tense shoulders. Not wanting to be around his sister and her bullshit any more, he hurried down to his basement bedroom to get Tony. The little boy was flopped in a beanbag in front of the small fish tank, watching Ugly swim back and forth. Zoro stood on the bottom step and rolled his eyes, "Come on already. Dad's waiting for us."

Tony jumped up eagerly, his eyes shining, "I wanna sit by you!"

"Sure, whatever, buddy." Grinning, Zoro waited until Tony tried to push past him to go up the steps before grabbing the little boy and hoisting him over his shoulder in a fireman's carry. Tony squealed with laughter as Zoro trotted up the stairs and to the front door. He stopped to let his brother down carefully before padding over to his sneakers. Tony was still giggling as he pulled on his own shoes and fastened the velcro straps.

"Zoro, did Koshiro tell you that we need to take your car too?" Mihawk strode into the entryway, jingling a suspiciously familiar set of keys in his hand.

"What?! No!" Zoro protested as he yanked on his shoes, "I need it today!"

Mihawk squinted at the googly-eyed shark keychain fob in his hand dubiously; examining the aquarium logo on the front before flipping it over to snort at the words 'For Marimo' scrawled in marker on the back, "We are aware of your plans. Which is why we're going to drop you off before going to the match. I don't have time to unload all of Tashigi's equipment from the back of the van right now."

"Seriously?!" Zoro whined and tried to grab his keys from his father.

Mihawk dodged his hand and arched a single eyebrow, "A mossball…? Really, Zoro?"

Blushing furiously, Zoro lunged and snatched up his keys, "Fucking fine! But I'm driving!"

"Language, son." Mihawk waved Tony out the front door after Zoro with a faint smirk before he locked their front door and strolled behind them to the car. Zoro rolled his eyes as he slid into the driver's seat.

When Tony went to open the passenger's side door, Mihawk stopped him with a hand on his shoulder, "Son, you need to ride in the van. Zoro doesn't have a booster seat in his car."

Zoro turned in his seat, resting his arm on the edge of the backrest as he watched his foster brother's face crumple into a miserable expression, "But Zozo said…!"

Rolling his eyes, Zoro interrupted sharply, "Don't call me Zozo!"

Mihawk's thin lips twitched into the barest hint of a smile, "Maybe next time, son. But for now I need you to obey."

"Tony!" Koshiro walked over from the van to bend over and take the little boy's hand as he started to sniffle, "If we hurry and leave soon we can stop for ice cream on the way!"

"Ice cream?" Tony's expression brightened as he rubbed at his teary eyes with his free hand as he let Koshiro gently lead him to the van's open side door.

Zoro smirked knowingly as he heard Kuina's outraged shout from the other vehicle, "Dad we can't stop! I have to be there early to warm up!" He wasn't disappointed when chaos promptly broke out and Perona began screeching from the back seat and demanding her favorite shitty mocha-flavored ice cream as Kuina bitched about 'being late'. Zoro snickered to himself as over all the obnoxious fighting, Tashigi began to loudly remind everyone that ice cream had too many calories and artificial ingredients, and that her coaches wouldn't approve.

"I can deal with angry parents and coaches, but I am still amazed at how Koko handles your sisters." Mihawk slid into the passenger's seat as he shook his head solemnly.

Next to the van, Zoro could see Koshiro's shoulders stiffen and he finished buckling Tony into his booster seat. He turned slowly with a terrifyingly serene expression, "Mihawk Diego Roronoa-Isshin, you did not just call me, Koko!"

Mihawk actually fucking smiled as Koshiro's eyes narrowed at him, and Zoro felt a chill run down his spine. His father wasn't well. Mihawk's unnerving grin grew wider, flashing his white teeth dangerously as he purred, "Yet you greatly enjoyed my endearments on our last date night, my love."

Koshiro's face bloomed a brilliant crimson, and Zoro turned to drop his head against the steering wheel with a groan as all his sisters made loud, disgusted sounds from the other car. Mihawk frantically patted at Zoro's knee and hissed, "Start the car now, son."

Zoro blindly turned his keys and jerked his head up to see Koshiro angrily trying to yank Mihawk's door open, while his shitty father pulled back on it to keep it closed. Zoro sat frozen for a moment, unsure of what to do, and Koshiro finally gave up. He made a few frustrated gestures and shut the van's side door before stalking around and getting into the driver's seat. Mihawk sighed and relaxed into his seat and Zoro snorted, "Dad is totally gonna poison you someday."

Mihawk raised a smug eyebrow, "Not after I bought him those silk sheets."

"Oh my god!" Zoro gagged and desperately turned on the radio - spinning the knob on the volume as high as possible so he wouldn't have to hear another horrible word. His shitty father was still smirking as he backed out of the driveway to head to the aquarium.

There was a blessed lack of interaction between the two of them until Zoro turned on to the highway leading further into town. Mihawk reached over and abruptly turned the radio off in the middle of an obnoxious car insurance ad. "Hey!" Zoro protested and tried to reach the power button, but Mihawk easily grabbed his wrist in a hard grip, "I would like you to tell me about this boyfriend of yours."

"God, Pops no!"

"I wasn't asking, son." Mihawk's tone was stern as he dropped Zoro's arm, "I am meeting this young man today, and I would like to know a bit about him. Perona has already informed me of how you met."

Groaning, Zoro was tempted to hit his head against the steering wheel until he had a concussion. Why was his family always like this?! "There's nothing to tell! He's great, okay?"

"Zoro. You know I just want what's best for you." Shifting uncomfortably in the driver's seat, Zoro tried his next best plan and ignored his father, hoping that he would drop the subject. Instead, Mihawk went straight for the kill, "I refuse to have to see my son end up in another medical office because this boy isn't what he seems to be."

Zoro felt like he'd been sucker-punched in the gut, and the car swerved dangerously in the lane before Mihawk calmly reached over and grabbed the wheel. Hurt was quickly replaced by all-too familiar humiliation and anger, and Zoro roughly shoved away Mihawk's arm, "It not fucking like that. Sanji isn't like that, and he would never fuck me over like… like…" His voice trailed off as his ex's name stuck in his throat. He could feel his father watching him closely - it spoke volumes that he hadn't given him shit about cursing - but he took a deep breath and tightened his grip on the steering wheel as he kept his eyes resolutely ahead, "Sanji is different, and he would never lie to me."

Mihawk was silent for a long moment before finally tapping the radio back on and turning down the volume, "Good. Because if he hurts my son I will bury him in the back yard. In pieces."

Zoro rolled his eyes, but he kept his thoughts on his father's overly-dramatic declarations to himself. He didn't even protest when his father tuned the dial to some godawful 60s music station. As long as the Beatles kept Mihawk's attention, Zoro would happily listen to their weirdass songs all day.

By the time they finally pulled into the aquarium parking lot, Zoro had heard enough about people living in yellow submarines, and shitty octopus and their gardens for one lifetime. He parked the car in the fire lane and eagerly jumped out - leaving the engine running, "Okay, I'll see you later, Pops!"

However, before he could fully make his escape, Mihawk reached over and deliberately turned off the car, tossing the keys in one hand as he stepped out onto the curb, "Any fines for parking violations will come out of your allowance."

"What?!"

Mihawk smirked, "So you had better introduce me to this, 'Sanji' quickly."

"Jesus Christ, really, Pops?!"

"Language, son."

Zoro muttered viciously under his breath as he marched angrily to the entrance with Mihawk hot on his heels. However, he had to laugh when he spotted Sanji in the lobby handing out maps with a silly, octopus-shaped hat made out of twisted, multicolored balloons. His boyfriend looked up right away and rolled his blue eyes as Zoro snickered. He pulled out his phone to snap a picture, and Sanji hilariously turned bright red, but the small children nearby reassured Zoro that his boyfriend wouldn't be able to retaliate just yet.

He'd completely forgotten about his father until Mihawk smoothly stepped around him and stared Sanji down with his favorite 'threatening' blank expression. Sanji's gaze darted uncertainly between Zoro and his father, and the moment quickly began to feel awkward before Mihawk finally spoke up, "I believe you are dating my son."

Zoro let his head fall back with a groan as Sanji's eyes widened in horror, "Uhhh…"

Mihawk held out a hand with a cold smile, "Please call me Mr. Roronoa-Isshin."

"Pops!" Zoro lurched forward and grabbed Sanji's shoulder - trying to tug him away before his father could be even more of an asshole.

Smirking, Mihawk let his hand drop, "Pity that young men aren't taught how to give a good handshake anymore. Says a lot about a person, don't you think?"

"Pops, stop!" Zoro hissed in irritation as he tried to urge his frozen boyfriend away to safety.

Mihawk, sighed with mock regret, "I need to get on the road, but it was nice finally meeting you…" Zoro felt his temper rise as his father drew out the last word, quirking an eyebrow like he didn't already fucking know Sanji's name.

Sanji finally seemed to recover somewhat, and he thrust his hand forward with a stubborn set to his jaw, "It's, Sanji, sir."

When Mihawk reached out and gripped his boyfriend's hand, Zoro winced in sympathy. However, Sanji's expression never changed, and after Mihawk released him with an approving nod, his eyes held an ornery glint, "I'm sorry to hear you can't stay, sir. May I hold the door for you on your way out?"

Zoro was shocked into complete silence, and Mihawk just blinked and stared a moment before turning on his heel and walking away without another word. Sanji snorted the moment Mihawk was out the front door and turned to Zoro, "I think that went well." He grabbed Zoro's hand and began to lead him - still stunned and somewhat horrified - through the crowded lobby. "Come on. I think they needed some help at the grill."