Warning: Not really much except for the implications of mature situations in the past. So please proceed with caution if you are sensitive to those kinds of things Oh, and cursing. Raph has a potty mouth at times here, but then…it's justified. If you are fine with all that, see you on the other side! :)

A/N: Hello everyone! I managed to get a new chapter up before the end of the year! YAY! You have no idea how relieved I am that I managed this. This chapter was REALLY stubborn! I was stuck for, literally, a couple of months for a while. Then, I went on a business trip at the beginning of November and suddenly everything just fell into place. Had my best run of writing I've had in a long time on that plane ride home. Guess I need to do more midnight flights. ^^;

Anyway! Not going to keep you too much longer. I just want to say that I hope everyone had a fantastic Christmas and if you don't celebrate Christmas, well…I hope you had a fantastic day too!

Thank you so much for reading and I hope you enjoy the chapter. Don't forget to favorite/follow or leave a kudos, a comment, and/or a review, depending on what site you're reading this on. Those things are digital motivation for me! ;)

Enjoy!

Chapter 20 – Desperate Measures

A blue mask lay coiled on itself on the bathroom counter as its owner stared at his reflection in the mirror hanging behind the sink. Leonardo lifted his hand and traced a forefinger along one of the deep lines running from the inner corners of his eyes. Those lines paired with the frown he wore made the turtle look years older than he was.

He bent down to splash himself with cold water for the fourth time since he'd come to the bathroom. As if this time would wash away the face he barely recognized. He looked at his reflection again, water dripping from his chin. Still there. A sigh as heavy as his heart slipped past his lips.

If only getting over what had happened could be so easy.

"If you think you look bad, imagine how haggard he must look without his mask," Leo thought. He grimaced and clamped his eyes closed to push back the sudden burning in them, lest he have to wash his face a fifth time.

Donatello: the brother Leo had failed the worst.

Several hours had passed since Donnie's revelation and tears still rushed to fill Leo's eyes every time his mind even touched on what the other turtle had been through. He would never have left Donnie behind if he'd known being raped was part of what his little brother would have to endure.

"I should have known it could happen," he chastised himself for the millionth time, his eyes squeezing shut tighter. "I am the leader! Everything that happens to my brothers is ultimately my responsibility. I never should've allowed naiveté to blind me to the horrors our enemies are capable of!"

A keening whine slipped from his throat and he lowered his head to rest it on the counter's edge. His hands knitted together behind his head and his elbows dipped down, effectively shielding his face from the world. "It's my fault. All my fault" kept repeating through his mind like a broken record.

A knock at the bathroom door freed the leader from his downward spiral.

"Leonardo?" came Raphael's voice. "You're still in there, right?"

His brother's subdued tone made Leo lift his head from its hiding place. He'd never heard rough-and-tough Raph sound so vulnerable in his life. It spoke volumes about how poorly the younger turtle was dealing with the situation too.

He could only imagine the mess Mikey and Donnie had to be right now. At the thought of his youngest siblings, Leo placed his hands on either side of the sink, pushed himself up, and glared at his reflection.

"ENOUGH!" the blue-eyed turtle mentally snarled. "Yes, what happened to Donnie is your fault. Nothing will ever change that. So, stop wallowing and be the leader your brothers need you to be!"

"Yeah, Raph. I'm here," he finally answered the other ninja as he dried his face and then reached for his mask. "I'll be out in a minute."

"That's what you said an hour ago," Raph growled.

A weak smile pulled on Leo's frown for a moment and he made a soft huff while he smoothed out the blue cloth in his hands. That sounded more like the brash brother he knew.

"I mean it this time," the leader promised as he tied his mask back into place.

He allowed a small sigh of relief after looking at his reflection one last time. His mask hid the lines around his eyes beautifully. "Good," the blue clad ninja thought. "Donnie's the turtle everyone needs to be worried about right now. I refuse to distract anyone from him with unnecessary concerns about me."

When Leo finally exited the bathroom, he found Raph leaning his carapace against the wall beside the door. The red clad turtle had his arms folded across his plastron and his right foot hiked up on the wall. He shifted his gaze from the floor to Leo without moving his head.

"You better?" the hothead asked. The question came out gruffer than he intended and he repressed the urge to wince because of it. Leo didn't need his bad attitude right now. Despite Fearless' attempts to hide it, Raph could tell the other turtle had only just managed to regain his composure. And it was hanging on by a thread.

The red banded turtle resisted the need to swallow at the memory of what happened in the dojo. He had never seen his older brother just fall apart like that. Never. In many ways, seeing Leo in such a state scared Raph more than the Shredder ever could. Not that he would ever admit it to anyone.

"Yeah. I guess," Leo replied, taking his brother's sour attitude in stride. Raph didn't realize it but hearing the irritability in his voice actually helped Leo find a more stable grip on his self-control. It made it seem like their world wasn't crashing down around them.

"Have you seen Mikey and Donnie?"

When the hothead answered with a shake of his head, the leader's eyes widened and his breathing quickened.

The red clad turtle took one look at his older brother's reaction and grabbed him by the shoulders. "But I have a damn good idea of where they are," he assured the other turtle before said turtle had a heart attack. Raph walked his brother to the end of the bedroom hall and aimed him at the open doors to the lab.

"Of course," Leo sighed, his shoulders slumping in relief. Then, a light pink rose to his cheeks at how quickly he'd jumped on the panic button. "Maybe I should have stayed in the bathroom longer," he thought as he hid his face in his hands.

Raph watched his older brother silently agonize for a minute. Then, he rested a hand on the other turtle's carapace. "Come on, bro," he murmured before guiding the blue clad turtle down the stairs and into their purple clad brother's haven.

The sight that greeted Leonardo and Raphael when they walked into the lab made their breath catch in their throats.

Michelangelo and Donatello were on the floor beside The Pulverizer's tank on the far side of the room. Mikey had his carapace to the brick wall. His arms had Donnie wrapped in a protective embrace. The side of his nose was pressed against Donnie's forehead.

Meanwhile, Donnie lay on his side against Mikey's plastron. The genius had pulled his long legs as close to his plastron as he could. It made him look so much smaller than he really was. His right hand had Mikey's left shoulder in a death grip while his left arm stayed coiled tightly to his chest.

Both younger turtles had their eyes closed. Drying tear trails streaked their round faces. It was evident that they had cried themselves to sleep in the hours since they left the dojo.

Raph swallowed down the knot trying to build in his throat. Then he gritted his teeth, shut his eyes against the blurring of his vision, and turned his head away from his little brothers. Just as he considered retreating to his room so his second breakdown of the night could happen in private, he heard Leo let out an unsteady breath. The red clad ninja's concern for his barely stable older brother gave him the strength to direct his gaze to the turtle beside him.

Leo's cobalt blue eyes looked wetter than usual as he stared at their little brothers, but, somehow, the leader managed to keep the tears from falling. He turned to Raph, grasped the other ninja by the shoulder, and gave him a gentle, reassuring squeeze. Next, he gestured for the hothead to go on to their brothers while he veered off to the lab's sink.

Raph blinked in surprise a couple of times. Then, a brief smile lifted his lips. Seeing Donnie and Mikey in such a state had galvanized Leo's big brother instincts. The brawny turtle watched his leaner counterpart work the lab's faucet for a moment before moving to follow his leader's silent request.

When the red clad turtle got within five feet of the purple and orange clad ones, Mikey's eyes opened and he lifted his head. The smaller turtle brought a forefinger to his lips.

Raph slowed his approach to keep it as soundless as possible. Once he reached his little brothers, he lowered himself to the floor so he could sit on Mikey's left. "How's he doing?" the hothead asked.

Mikey looked down at their sleeping brother. He gently began to smooth a hand over the brainy turtle's head. "Not good," he breathed before making a soft snort. "But, on the bright side, this is the best sleep he's had in weeks."

The red masked turtle's frown deepened at just how bitter the orange masked one sounded. 'Bitter' and 'Mikey' were two words that never belonged together. "What about you, little brother?"

Michelangelo glanced at Raphael out of the corner of his eyes for a moment. Then he returned his gaze to the turtle cuddled against him. "I'm OK," he murmured.

"Really?" Raph pressed as he raised an eye ridge.

The smaller turtle's face pinched and his chin trembled before he shook his head and whimpered, "No."

Raph's expression softened some. He carefully put his arm around Mikey's shoulders so he could scoot closer to his little brother's side.

Mikey let out a shuddering sigh at his older brother's attempt at soothing him. He then dragged the back of his right hand across the underside of his nose while making a wet, messy-sounding sniffle.

The hothead tried not to cringe as his ordinarily cheerful brother rested that same hand on top of their genius brother's head. As much as he wanted to pull Mikey's hand off Donnie, Raph resisted the urge. He suspected the small comfort Mikey's touch offered Donnie was worth the risk of a little snot.

Leonardo, meanwhile, waited for the water from the lab's sink to warm while he watched Michelangelo rest the side of his head on Raphael's offered shoulder. A frail smile tugged on the leader's lips even though his eye ridges remained pulled into a tight, fretful knot. Seeing his brothers seeking solace from each other reminded Leo that, so long as they stayed by each other's side, they would make it through this.

A sudden sensation of fire pouring over his fingers ripped Leo's attention back to the faucet and he yanked his hand from the flowing water with a hiss. He muttered a curse under his breath as he adjusted the sink's handles again. Once he got the water to the right temperature, he took down two towels from a stack on the shelf hanging above the sink. He placed each one under the stream until it was wet. Then he wrung out the excess water, turned off the faucet, and moved to join his brothers.

As the blue clad ninja walked in the others' direction, his foot kicked something light. He looked down at the skittering sound the item made. A crumpled piece of paper danced across the floor until it came to a stop about a foot away from him. His already furrowed brow tightened.

The most intellectual of the four brothers was obsessive about keeping his lab tidy. So, the fact this scrap of paper never made it to the trash bin was highly unusual. Of course, poor Donnie was understandably out of sorts. It only made sense his lab would be as well.

So, Leo squatted down to pick up the bit of litter. His eyes widened the moment his fingers curled around it.

"This isn't just any paper," he thought as he turned the ball over in his hand, noting the paper's fine surface and pure ivory color. "This is mitsumatagami. Donnie knows how hard it is for us to get our hands on this stuff! He would never waste it like this. Even if he hated the result, he would still use the paper as practice scrap until he'd covered every inch."

The blue clad turtle's eyes narrowed at the black lines he could make out within the ball's depths. Donnie must have written something on it before he'd so haphazardly discarded it. Leo draped the towels he carried in his other hand over his shoulder and set himself to the task of picking the paper back into its proper shape. His eye ridges shot up when he noticed the sheet had been ripped in half before being balled up. Donnie had clearly taken some aggression out on it.

Once Leo had the pieces uncrumpled, it took him a few seconds to align the two halves so he could read what his brainy brother had written. As soon as he did, he wished he'd just thrown the whole thing away.

Leonardo had never seen a more beautiful example of his genius brother's calligraphy work in his life. However, the message the Japanese characters conveyed was anything but beautiful. His vision began to waver and Donatello's voice echoed in Leo's mind as he read:

"I am useless."

Despite the growing tightness in his chest and throat, the leader pulled in a ragged breath. He then turned his gaze away from his brother's words and closed his eyes against the moisture building in them. "I'm sorry, Donnie," he thought. "I'm sorry I left you behind. I'm sorry I wasn't there to stop that monster from doing the unthinkable to you. And I am so, so sorry that I didn't realize just how much you were hurting."

His eyelids squeezed tighter together as his lips pressed into a thin, downturned line. "I should have figured out a way for you to help with our missions instead of just leaving you behind to fall deeper into the self-doubt I knew you were feeling. I…I should have done more to help you. If I had, maybe you wouldn't have felt the need to come up with this crazy plan. And maybe…" The leader swallowed down the lump building in his throat. "Maybe things wouldn't have gotten to the point where I would be desperate enough to consider going through with it."

A sniffle from Mikey pulled Leo out of the hold his regret had on him. He pried his eyes open and returned his gaze to the paper in his hand. As he stared at his brilliant little brother's despairing words, determination settled over him. He wrapped himself in it like a blanket. "I can't undo what's happened, but I also can't keep dwelling on the past. My brothers need me right now. I have to be strong for them."

The blue masked ninja folded the two halves of paper into a neat square and tucked it into his belt. Then he pulled himself upright and made his way to where his three brothers were huddled together.

Donatello continued to sleep against Michelangelo's plastron. Mikey's head still rested on Raphael's shoulder and the brawny turtle had taken the proximity as a chance to lean his cheek against it. Both brightly colored turtles looked up at their eldest brother's approach.

Once Leonardo knelt in front of them, he offered Mikey one of the damp towels he carried. Mikey took the offered cloth with one hand and pulled his mask from his face with the other so that the orange fabric now hung like a bandana around his neck. "You're not gonna let him go through with this plan of his…are you, Leo?" the smallest turtle asked as he used the towel to wipe the tear lines from his face.

Leo's eyes widened at the question, but soon softened at the anxious, pleading expression on his baby brother's face. "Mikey…you're the one who said Donnie needed to be doing something in order to get better."

"Well…yeah," Mikey returned while he looked away from Leo. "But, I..." The smallest turtle shook his head, wrapped his arms around his brainy brother's shoulders, and squeezed the other turtle tighter to him as he whimpered, "I didn't mean this!"

The leader felt his throat start tightening again at his youngest brother's distress. He slid closer so he could stretch over Donnie's form and gently hug Mikey's head to his plastron. "I know you didn't."

"I don't want him to go."

"I know. None of us do."

"Then..." Mikey started as he pulled out of Leo's hug just enough to peer up at his big brother, his glistening eyes beginning to well with hope, "...you are gonna tell him no?"

Leo swallowed at this choked question. He pulled away from Mikey and let out a heavy sigh. "You know it's not that simple," he murmured.

"S-So, what're we gonna do?"

"I promised Donnie I would listen to what he had to say if he told us what happened, remember?" The oldest turtle paused to look away from his brothers and hide the guilt trying to overwhelm him again. "I don't like this any more than you two do, but we have to, at least, hear him out. After all he's been through, we owe him that much."

Mikey's bottom lip quivered as Leo spoke, but he soon lowered his head and nodded weakly. Even though he didn't want this plan to happen, Mikey agreed that Donnie deserved to be heard. More than that, he needed to be heard.

The smallest turtle pulled in a deep breath through his mouth. Then he brought his towel to his face with both hands. Leo and Raph's eyes went enormous and they moved to stop their youngest brother too late.

Mikey pressed the cloth to his nose and blew. The sound echoed through the lab like the horn of a subway. It made both older turtles wince and squeeze their eyes shut as their noses wrinkled in disgust.

Slowly, the two opened their eyes only to have them blink stupidly when they saw that Donnie was still asleep. Their brainy brother hadn't even twitched at the obnoxious sound.

Leo's eye ridges furrowed together for a moment. He knew his second youngest brother had to be exhausted after everything that happened today. However, he also knew Donnie was the sole person in the lair who was a lighter sleeper than Master Splinter. The leader watched the genius while their baby brother resumed snuggling him. The purple clad turtle was too still, his breathing too deliberate.

A brief smile touched Leo's face as he said, "Besides, I'm sure Donatello will be mad at me if I go back on my word now." He paused for a couple of seconds while he half-lidded his eyes. "Isn't that right, Donnie?"

Mikey looked at Leo. His expression barely had time to become confused before Donnie let out a heavy sigh, drawing Mikey's attention right back to him. The tall turtle's brown eyes opened. They showed no signs of having been asleep.

"Dude!" Michelangelo cried as he allowed Donatello to extricate himself from his grasp. "How long have you been awake?"

"Long enough," Donnie answered softly and lifted his eyes to meet his little brother's. "I understand how you feel, Mikey." He looked at each of his older brothers in turn as he said, "I understand how you all feel. I don't want to do this, either."

"Then don't!" Mikey whimpered while grabbing one of Donnie's hands in both of his.

The tallest turtle faltered but managed to keep his voice from cracking. "This isn't about want, Ototo. It's about need." Donnie's fingers curled around one Mikey's hands and gave it a firm squeeze. "The Kraang need to be stopped. Therefore, I need to do this."

"That's still up for debate."

Leonardo nodded in agreement with Raph's gruff statement. "I only agreed to hear your plan, Donnie. I didn't commit us to going through with it. And I won't until I know what your plan involves."

The brilliant turtle let out a sigh at this but lowered his eyes and nodded resignedly. His eyes blinked in surprise when a towel suddenly blocked his view of the floor. He looked up at the owner of the hand holding the cloth. Leo's cobalt blue eyes softened and a small, encouraging smile lifted the corners of his mouth.

Donnie's vision became a little bleary, but he managed to return the smile with a meek one of his own as he took the offered towel. His smile gained a thankful aura when he noted that the material was damp. Without another moment's hesitation, he gripped the cloth in both hands and buried his face in it to clean away the remnants of his emotional breakdown. Unlike Mikey, Donnie didn't even bother to remove his mask.

Leo's frown returned at this. He had hoped his second youngest brother would finally let his guard down. That he would allow them to see the physical evidence of the toll this situation had to be taking on him. The leader resisted the urge to roll his eyes at his continued naiveté. Like the resident genius would be foolish enough to compromise the chances of his plan being approved with something as simple as that.

Donnie sighed into the towel before dragging it down his face. He then began to neatly fold it, if only to give his hands something to do. "Where to begin…" he murmured.

"How about at step one?" Leo answered, startling Donnie into looked up from the towel. The brainy turtle hadn't even realized he'd spoken aloud. A slight smile briefly touched the leader's face at just how big his brilliant brother's mocha eyes could get before he prompted, "How do you plan on getting into the Kraang facility?"

"Ah!" Donnie said before a sheepish smile flickered over his face. "Yeah…t-that would be best, wouldn't it?" He cleared throat and then swallowed in an attempt to push back his anxiety. "Getting in is actually the easy part. I use my digital lock-pick to open the door. Then, like you guys did when you rescued me before, I use the ventilation system to get around until I find…my target."

"Then we already have a problem."

"What?" Donnie asked as he blinked at his eldest brother's statement.

"It was pure luck that we got what we needed to get past security last time," Raph answered for Leo as he pulled away from Mikey so he could fold his arms across his plastron. "And it took a month for us to get that break!"

"I refuse to rely on luck again," Leo sternly declared after he made a single nod of agreement with Raph. "The digital lock-pick needs to stay with us in case your plan takes a turn for the worst. That way, we can get you out of there a lot sooner than before."

Donnie made a soft sigh. "Good point." He pulled himself to his feet and brought the side of his forefinger to his lips as he paced over to his workbench. When his eyes landed on the collection of machines resting there, the genius snapped his fingers and whirled back to his brothers. "I mentioned before that I could build a new one. Now's as good a time as any!"

"Do you have what you need?" Leo asked as he stood up as well, joined his purple clad brother at the workbench, and picked up one of the broken electronics so he could turn it over in his hands. Part of him was excited at the prospect of having another digital lock-pick in their arsenal; the other part didn't want it to happen because it meant he had one less reason to reject Donnie's plan.

"Like I said last night, none of the parts are particularly hard to get," Donnie returned with a shrug. "I should be able to find what I need from the odds and ends you've brought home for your tech lessons. In fact," he began as he took the device Leo held and carefully pried its casing apart so he could poke around inside. "With what I've learned since I built the first one, I bet I can improve upon the lock-pick's design and make your version more effective."

Leo couldn't help but smile at the familiar glimmer beginning to dance in his brainy brother's gentle eyes. "It's been too long since I've seen Donnie get that look," he thought. The leader's smile fell some and its remnants took on a sad tone. "Too bad it took talking about this crazy plan to bring it out."

"How long do you think it would take you to build a new one?" Leo asked quietly, hating to interrupt his second youngest brother's enthusiasm but knowing they still had a lot to cover.

Donnie paused and his gaze turned inward like it often did whenever he was doing mental calculations. "Taking my current," he hesitated and a frustrated frown pulled on his face as he rolled his eyes, "'handicap' into account? About a week?"

"Alright," the blue clad turtle said. "It's something that will be useful regardless of whether or not we go through with this idea of yours. So, go ahead and plan on building it."

A smile lifted Donnie's lips again, though it wasn't as strong as before, and he gave Leo a single, sharp nod.

"So…you find the prick and wait until he's alone to approach him, right?" Raph gruffly spoke up as he stood and moved to stand at Leo's right shoulder.

The tallest turtle looked at his fellow middle brother and nodded once again, only this time, the gesture was more cautious.

"Then what?" Leo said calmly, interrupting Raph before he could continue. The leader knew the resident hothead had a bad habit of intimidating their younger brothers. Sometimes without meaning to. He didn't want Donnie to shorten the description his plan just to keep Raph from getting temperamental.

"I…" the purple clad turtle said, drawling the word several seconds longer than needed. He tossed the broken electronic he still held from one hand to the other as he searched for the right way to continue. It had been much easier to find the words he needed when all he had in front of him was a blank notepad. Having three pairs of eyes staring at him made all the ideas he'd worked so hard to come up with flee from him.

"Maybe I should have approached Leo alone," ran through Donnie's mind. He caught the electronic in one hand and squeezed it until the pointed parts dug into his palm. "No…it had to be this way," he chided himself. "If I'd only told Leo, he would have gone to Raph and Mikey afterward and they would have had a chance to talk him out of going through with my plan. This way, I can hear the points they're making and counter them in real time. Now, stop hesitating and get on with it!"

Donatello closed his eyes and pulled in a deep breath through his nose. When he exhaled, he opened his eyes and locked them with Leo's piercing blue ones. "I tell him that I have a proposal to make to the lead Kraang of the facility and to take me to him."

The genius resisted the urge to cringe. He knew how weak what he'd just said sounded. The fact that all three of his brothers quirked an eye ridge in the same manner only confirmed it. He did his best to ignore the nagging doubts whispering in the back of his brain and tried to remain focused on his goal.

"And when he says you can tell them from a cell and goes to grab you?" Raph growled as he folded his arms over his plastron again, unmistakably unimpressed with the plan so far.

"I may not be stronger or faster than him, but I am more nimble," Donnie answered as he directed his gaze to Raph. "That should allow me to keep out of his grasp long enough to make my point. Meanwhile, I tell him that my offer is gone the second my feet touch the floor of a cell." A smirk spread over Donnie's face as he added, "And then he can have the 'pleasure' of explaining to the Kraang why he threw away an opportunity to gain leverage over their enemies."

The unexpected sinister timbre from his mild brother disconcerted Raphael into silence. For the first time since they began talking about this suicidal plan, the red clad turtle considered that the purple clad one might have an additional agenda.

Leonardo noticed the shift in his intellectual brother's tone as well, but he tried not to read too deeply into it. After everything Donnie had been through, it was only natural for him to take a little satisfaction at the idea of his tormentor's potential suffering.

"Alright…let's say that gets him to listen," the leader allowed. "What if he asks why he should trust you?"

Donatello's smirk faded as quickly as it had risen. "It's said the best lies have a grain of truth to them," he stated, his voice turning somber. "So, the answer to that question is simple: 'Because I have nowhere else to go.'"

Michelangelo had followed his family to the workbench, but he'd been hanging back as the others spoke. However, the moment those words left his brainy brother's mouth, the orange clad ninja let out a whimper and pushed past the two eldest turtles so he could stand before the tallest one. "That's not true!" he blurted out, his blue eyes glistening. "You belong here! With us!"

"Mikey!" Leo scolded. The last thing they needed right now was for their dramatic brother to trigger one of Donnie's flashbacks.

Donnie stared at the smaller turtle with wide eyes for several moments. Then he blinked rapidly to hold back the sudden rush of tears that wanted to fill them. The tall ninja pulled his baby brother into a gentle hug. "I know, Mikey," he soothed. "That's why it's a lie."

"But…but you said there was truth to it!" Mikey protested even as he buried himself into his older brother's embrace.

"I did. But that truth is if one of us were to have a falling out with the others and leave the lair in the current environment, that one turtle would be screwed," Donnie explained. "They would be easy pickings for our enemies. Unless…"

"Unless they made a pact with one of those enemies to gain protection from the others," Leo finished, starting to see where his second youngest brother was going with his plan.

Donnie made a short, closed-mouth chuckle at Leo's perceptiveness and brought a hand up to tap his nose with a forefinger a couple of times. Leo smiled at his brother's silent affirmation.

"Alright then, so where does…" Raph paused to try and remember the term Donnie and Leo used in the dojo earlier, "…'Stockholm syndrome' come into play?"

"Well, I doubt either Horse or the Kraang will consider that diagnosis at my initial approach," Donnie admitted. "However, the fact that I've left my family and gone to the same enemies who tortured me for a month for safe harbor will indicate that something major is wrong up here." The genius ninja pressed a forefinger to his temple as he spoke. "Something they can take advantage of."

"And what, exactly, are they gonna get outta this?" Raph pressed as he adjusted how tightly he had his arms crossed.

The intellectual turtle pulled in and released a deep breath before answering, "Their very own, disposable ninja to keep tabs on their new allies. To make sure the Kraang will see the knife coming long before the Foot Clan can target their back."

Mikey pulled his head from Donnie's plastron so he could stare up at the taller ninja. "You're gonna offer to spy on the Shredder for the Kraang?!"

"That's why I said I might be able to get info on what the Foot is doing as well." Donnie fought the urge to sigh at the incredulous expressions on all his brothers' faces. "Look. The only reason the Kraang forged this alliance with the Foot is us. If we weren't in the equation, there is no way the Kraang would trust a human as powerful as the Shredder to stay out of their way. I bet a month's worth of pizza they still don't trust him to keep out of their business. If I offer them the chance to keep an eye on what he's doing with no consequences to them, I'm certain they'll jump on it!"

The blue clad turtle sighed and rubbed a hand behind his head for a moment while the other went to rest on his hip. They hadn't gotten into all the details yet, but so far the plan didn't seem quite as crazy as when Donnie had first proposed it. Yes, it relied a lot on things going just right, but then Leo had created plans with similar conditions. And if there was one turtle the leader could count on to make sure all the details lined up, it was Donnie. However, one aspect in particular still gave him pause.

"You've made a good argument so far, Donnie. But there's one thing I'm still not sold on," Leo quietly said as he rested a hand on Donnie's shoulder. "How can you be so sure that Nightmare will listen to you? I mean, you mentioned before that the two of you were building a kind of rapport. And hinting that he'll get punished for not listening should be a good motivator. But, I…I keep getting the impression that there's something else going on too."

Before the blue clad leader even finished speaking, he felt a tremor run through the purple banded genius' frame. Leo's wide eyes went to the hand in contact with Donnie and then dropped down to Mikey, who still hadn't released their brother from his hug. The youngest ninja's blue eyes locked onto his and Leo could see his unspoken question reflecting back to him.

Leonardo's eyes narrowed and his frown became stern. He returned his steely gaze to Donnie, who promptly looked away. The grip Leo had on his little brother's shoulder tightened as he demanded, "What aren't you telling us?"

Donatello took a shuddering breath, let go of Michelangelo, and took a few steps back so that he wasn't in contact with either his youngest or oldest brothers anymore. He then wrapped his arms around himself and shifted his weight from one foot to the other. It took Mikey whimpering his name for the genius to find the courage to look at his brothers again.

"Throughout my-my time with him, I-" Donnie stammered, "I kept getting the impression that…" He paused to swallow down a hard lump developing in his throat before he could continue, "…that Horse had a…thing for me. Sometimes, the way he'd look at me was just a little too intense." Donnie gripped his arms tight enough to hurt. "Or his touch would…linger...for a little too long. And…and this was all before h-he even…" His voice trailed off, leaving the rest of his statement unsaid.

Raphael's green eyes widened to the point that they were almost round before they narrowed into dangerous slits and his hands dropped to his sides as they balled into fists. "Oh yeah. I totally want him near you now," he declared with a bitterly sarcastic snarl. "What makes you think something like that is a good thing!?"

"The fact that if you'd discovered an enemy harbored feelings for one of us under any other circumstances, you wouldn't hesitate to take advantage of it!" Donnie countered, the anger in Raph's voice helping the taller turtle find his own. He then pointed a forefinger at his hotheaded brother. "You're the one who loves to point out how stupid I act when it comes to April, remember?"

Raph sputtered incoherently for a moment before he let out an indignant growl. He then folded his arms across his plastron once more, turned so that his side faced Donnie, and looked away from his fellow middle brother with a disgruntled frown.

Donnie directed his attention to Leo as he said, "And you have to admit you don't always think straight when it comes to Karai."

Leo's eyes widened and a dark pink colored his entire face at being called out on his embarrassing crush over the Shredder's daughter.

The purple clad turtle's ire faltered for a moment and he offered his eldest brother a brief apologetic look before returning his attention to Raph. "This is an opportunity we can't afford to waste. And you know it!"

Raph whipped around and shot Donnie a glare. "If it means keeping that bastard away from you, I am more than happy to waste it!" he growled.

Donnie let out his own little growl, only his was of frustration. He appreciated Raph's desire to protect him, but surely even the hothead realized they couldn't afford such luxuries.

Leo quickly stepped between his more temperamental brothers and held his hands up to silence both of them. "How about we decide whether or not to pass on this 'opportunity' after we finish hearing Donatello out?" the leader said with more calm than he felt while giving his immediate younger brother a hard scowl. He wasn't thrilled with what their brainy brother had just disclosed either, but the revelation didn't change their duty to hearing him out.

Raph met Leo's black look with one of his own. It appeared as though the hothead and leader may devolve into one of their infamous arguments. "Leo doesn't need your crap right now! Remember?!" echoed in Raph's mind even as he glared at the other turtle. Despite the overwhelming desire to knock sense into his overbearing brother with his fists, Raph backed down. "Fine," he hissed between gritted teeth before giving all of his brothers his shell.

Leo blinked a couple of times before he let out a heavy, relieved sigh. "Thanks, Raph."

The prickly turtle only gave his older brother a short grunt in response.

The blue banded turtle lowered his hands and returned his attention to his more intellectual brother. "All right. Let's assume that everything lines up and you get in. How do you plan to stay in contact with us? After all, you'll need to report any information you find."

A small smile twitched at the corner of Donnie's mouth. "With this." He reached across his workbench, picked up, and then presented what looked like a burnt turtle shell.

Leo recognized the T-phone as the one they'd retrieved the night of his brother's rescue. "Um, Donnie. I'm pretty sure that T-phone isn't going to be sending much of anything anymore."

The smile Donnie wore grew a little bit stronger. "Just as you are meant to believe," he quipped as he tapped on the device's glass before holding it out to his brothers. The cracked screen flickered a couple of times before the battered phone came to life.

Both Mikey and Leo gaped at the phone, but Mikey spoke first. "Dude! I thought those things were no good once they fried themselves."

"You're almost right, Mikey," Donnie answered. "The primary purpose of the self-destruct protocol is to make any stored information that could compromise the lair's location unusable. Typically, the T-phone's other components are so damaged as a result of the overload that it's impossible to fully repair one.

"However, that doesn't mean it's impossible to restore some functionality." The brainy turtle activated something on the device and continued to speak, but his brothers startled when his voice resounded out of the speakers on the lab's computer, giving his voice a strange duality. "Such as transmitting audio signals to my desktop." Donnie patted the casing of his CPU. "Allowing you guys to hear everything happening around me."

Leo's eyes narrowed in confusion for a moment before they shot wide open. "You mean to turn yourself into a walking, talking bug?!"

Donnie tilted his head to the side. "I believe the forensic term is 'covert listening device.'"

"That's not funny, Donnie!" Leo snapped as his expression turned sour.

"I wasn't trying to be," the other ninja returned, his own face becoming grim.

"Do you have any idea how risky that is! If they figure out what you're doing-"

"I'll end up in a cell for them to question, torture, and, possibly, kill," the purple clad turtle interrupted. "Which, if you think about it, is the exact same gamble we all take every time we go up against the Kraang."

Leo swallowed the rest of his words. Donnie did have a point. However, Leo couldn't shake the feeling that his brother had, either accidentally or purposefully, neglected one additional danger that only this mission held. Part of the leader wanted to call the genius out on it, but the rest of him superstitiously feared that doing so risked bring it into existence.

Instead, the blue clad ninja sighed and folded his arms across his plastron. "Alright, fine," he said with the hint of a growl in his voice. "So, we'll be able to hear what's going. That will reduce the need to send reports to us. But what if you find out something that wasn't spoken about? Or we need to get in touch with you for something? Can that thing still send and receive calls?"

"No," the taller turtle answered. "I haven't been able to repair that aspect yet." Donnie then sighed and shook his head. "And, honestly, I didn't intend to. Phone calls will be too easy for the Kraang to intercept. Not to mention, they will increase my chances of being caught because all it takes is one call sent at the wrong time."

Leo nodded and lifted his hand to his face as his expression turned contemplative. "Too true." He snapped his fingers and pointed at the purple banded ninja. "What about text messages? If you kept your phone on silent mode, it would avoid the bad timing issue."

Donnie resisted the urge to smile. He'd pulled his oldest brother enough into planning mode that the other turtle had inadvertently begun to make suggestions on how to get the plan work. "And it would be easy enough to make sporadic checks to see if you guys sent anything. However, they would still run the risk of interception."

"What about putting some kind of encryption on them?" Leo asked. "Or do you think that would be asking too much of your poor T-phone?"

The most intelligent brother shook his head once. "No, if I can repair the texting function of my T-phone, I'm pretty sure it'll be up to the task. However, I'm also pretty sure the Kraang are technologically advanced enough to crack any encryption program."

"So, it won't work then," Leo said, his shoulders slumping some. He really thought he'd been onto something.

"No, that's not what I'm saying," Donnie replied as he set his T-phone onto his desk and turned back around to sit on the edge of his workbench. "I'm just saying that any kind of encryption we use needs to be done manually."

"Wait," Mikey interrupted as he raised his hand as though he were asking a teacher for permission to speak. "You can do encryption without a computer or some other techie thing?"

Leo and Donnie exchanged patient, yet amused expressions even as Raph groaned and ran his hand down his face.

"All encryption means, Mikey, is to send a message in such a way that people who aren't allowed to know what it says can't read it," the eldest turtle explained to the youngest. "It would be like…if we spoke Japanese in front of April. We would be encrypting our conversation from her because she can't understand the language."

"Oooohhhh! You mean like the big words Donnie uses when he's telling us about his latest invention until Raph tells him to speak English?"

This time, Raph joined Leo in snickering as their genius brother flushed a deep red.

"Yeah, Mikey," the hothead answered for Leo before Donnie could protest. "Just like that."

"Cool! So that means we're gonna start texting in Japanese?" Mikey said while he bounced on his toes a bit.

"I'm not so sure that's a good idea," Leo replied, snatching away the only bit of enthusiasm Mikey had about the whole plan. "Any kind of well-known language will be too easy for the Kraang to translate."

"Agreed," Donnie chimed in, "Besides, while I'm sure I can make your T-phones send and receive the language, I'm also certain the circuits that allow the change in my phone are irreparable."

"So, we're stuck using the English alphabet if we do this insanity," Raph muttered. "Good. My hiragana and katakana are rusty anyway."

"They wouldn't be if you had kept up with your calligraphy," Leo admonished.

"Yeah, yeah. Whatever, Fearless," Raph growled as he rolled his eyes.

The blue banded ninja shook his head a couple of times at the red banded one's dismissal, making Donnie smile at the brief moment of normalcy between his elder brothers.

"So, where does that leave us, Donnie? I mean, I don't know about you, but I'm sure me, Raph, and Mikey don't have enough time to learn something like Navajo."

"Learn what now?!" Mikey yelped.

"Navajo," Leo repeated for his little brother. "The American armed forced recruited several of members of that Native American tribe to encrypt radio transmissions in World War II because their language is not common outside their community, is complex, and isn't similar to any other languages."

"Oh. Dude, how do you know so much?"

"I read things other than comic books," Leonardo said while aiming a disapproving look at Michelangelo, making the other turtle fold his arms across his plastron and pout.

Donatello, meanwhile, had rested the elbow of his right arm in his left hand and brushed his forefinger under his chin as he pondered Leo's question. Then, his eyes lit up and he pushed himself off his workbench. "Mikey, could you run to my room and get the book on my nightstand? The one that's pulled out from the rest?"

"Sure thing, bro!" Mikey chirped and spun around to do as his older brother asked. He was happy to be doing something other than listen to Donnie and Leo work out the details of this awful plan. The whole thing knotted up his insides worse than cappuccino jalapeno pizza.

Leo arched an eye ridge as he watched one little brother race out of the room and the other head over to the lab's densely stocked bookshelf. He followed the taller of the two and watched him scan over the spines with a purpose. "What are you thinking, Donnie?"

"If we can't use a program and we can't use an existing code, we'll just have to make our own."

"Make our own?" Leo sputtered. "Donnie, you may as well forget about this plan and focus on healing if we're gonna go to that extreme!"

"You're right," Donnie admitted even as he continued to search the bookshelf. "Creating a code can be quite involved, depending on the complexity desired. It can take several months to develop one because you not only have to create the code but also the key needed to decrypt any messages using that code. That's why we're going to use a shortcut."

Leonardo's eye ridges crinkled together. "A shortcut? What kind of shortcut?"

"We pick something we have readily available to be the key and then build the code around it. Ah-ha!" Donatello cried as he plucked one of the more worn books off the shelf before turning to face Leo again. "And thanks to Raph, I have the perfect thing we can use."

Raphael, who had kept his back to his older and younger brothers this whole time, whirled around at this and yelped, "What?!"

As if on cue, Michelangelo trotted back into the lab. "Here ya go, Donnie. This is the one you wanted, right?"

"Yup! Thanks, Mikey."

Raph's eyes dropped down to the book as it passed between his younger brothers before they widened. "That…that's the book I gave you last week."

"Exactly!" the brainy turtle said while walking over to his desk and setting the two books onto it so everyone could see them.

Leo's already knit brow tightened more and he moved over to the desk. His gaze flicked between the two textbooks and, despite the rough condition the one from the lab's bookshelf was in, he still noticed more than a little similarity between them. "Are they the same book?"

"More than just that," Donnie declared, his voice rising with his excitement. "They are the same edition of the same book. Meaning, they are identical; right down to their typos! This makes them the perfect key."

The blue clad leader picked up the better-conditioned book and opened it to see what kind of writing it contained. In his quick scan of the text, he picked up several words he'd seen in Donnie's lab journals. "Since you have a key picked out, does this mean you already know what kind of code we should use?"

"I don't have all the details worked out yet, but I do have an idea of where to start," the purple banded genius answered as he sat at his desk. He pulled the remaining book close along with a sheet of paper and a pencil. Then he flipped the book open and began scanning pages all while writing something down on the paper. When he finished this bizarre process, he closed the book, set down the pencil, and handed the paper to his eldest brother. "Here."

Leo took the page and blinked a few times. A series of letters and numbers ran across the top of the paper. From what he could determine at first glance, the letters and numbers were paired, but he couldn't tell much more than that. "Um…little help?"

A smile tugged at Donnie's face. He leaned back in his chair, crossed his arms over his plastron, and hiked one leg up to rest it over the knee of the other. "Where's the fun in just giving it to you? You've got this."

The blue clad ninja gave his purple clad brother a frustrated glare but returned his thoughts to the paper in his hands. "'P18,'" he read the first letter-number pair out loud as he thought about what it could mean. It had to have something to do with the books. But what? "Page," he breathed before looking at his brainy brother. "Page 18."

The other turtle's smile became knowing and decidedly proud.

Leo felt himself returning the smile as he set the book he still held on the desk and flipped straight to the page in question. He scanned the page, but nothing jumped out at him. His gaze went back to the paper in his hand. The code 'R23' immediately followed the page number. His brow furrowed.

What in the world could 'R' stand for? He stared hard at the page, but nothing seemed to fit. The words were in sentences that were arranged into paragraphs, like most texts of its kind. Nothing there to indicate what 'R' could mean. Unless it stood for 'paragraph' since 'P' had already been used to mean 'page.' He quickly counted the paragraphs on the page but came far short of the required twenty-three.

A frustrated growl slipped out of the leader as rested his head in one of his hands and allowed his eyes to wander the page. When they settled on the left margin, he noted how everything seemed to be in perfect, neat- "Rows!" Leo's mind yelped. He dragged his forefinger down the page as he counted until he found the twenty-third row.

He left his forefinger on the page to hold his spot and looked back at the bit of code. The next part simply said '12.' Leo blinked at this. Twelfth what? He considered that maybe his brother meant the twelfth letter in the row. However, after looking at the rest of the code, the leader could tell it wasn't long enough to spell much of anything.

"It's gotta be something else," he thought. He set the paper down so he could run his now free forefinger back and forth against his jawline while staring at the page. Then, he used that same hand to cover his face. "Of course. Way to overthink this, Leo!" he scolded himself before he began to count the words in row twenty-three. As soon as he found the twelfth word, he wrote it down under the code that had led him to it.

Leonardo repeated this process with the rest of the code until he'd gone through the whole thing. He let out an amused snort once he saw what he'd decoded. "'Not everything needs to be complex. Sometimes simple is best,'" he read before he looked at his genius brother.

Donatello grinned wide enough to expose the gap in his front teeth. "Told you that you had this."

"Will this be enough?"

"Well," the genius began as he took the coded message from his leader. "Most of the words we'll need to communicate should be in this book. Especially when it comes to technical and mechanical terms. We'll still need to refine it so we can transmit any words not included in the book. However, that shouldn't take long. It certainly won't take the months of work a more sophisticated code would take."

"Hold up a sec," Mikey suddenly spoke up as he came over to his cooler colored brothers. "If Leo figured out the code like that," the smallest turtle snapped his fingers to emphasize how fast he felt his eldest brother had worked, "how can you be so sure the Kraang won't crack it too?"

"If the Kraang intercept our messages, I have no doubt they'll be able to figure out the code," Donnie admitted, startling his oldest and youngest brothers. "However, without knowing exactly what we're using as the key, they won't be able to crack it."

"Forget the stupid code!" Raphael snarled, interrupting the other turtles and stomping over to his brainy brother's desk and workbench. He braced his hands on the surface in front of him and leaned over it to lock his green eyes onto the tallest turtle's brown ones. "I care more about what you're gonna do about those flashbacks of yours. They cripple you, Donnie!"

Donatello flicked his eyes to the side in an attempt to avoid his temperamental brother's intense glare. He then opened his mouth to respond, but Raph cut him off.

"And don't you dare say you don't have that many! You've had two in the last week. And those are just the ones I've noticed. How are you gonna keep 'em from happening when you're face-to-face with the reason you have 'em in the first place!?"

"Ok, Raph. Dial it down a notch," Leo scolded. He moved to stand beside his immediate younger brother so he could pull him back from their second youngest brother. Donnie was stressed out enough without Raph getting in his face. The leader blinked in surprised when he felt a hand grasp his forearm.

"It's alright, Leo," Donnie said as he pulled the blue clad turtle to a stop and got to his feet. "Raph has a point. My flashbacks are a concern."

The hotheaded ninja straightened up with a self-satisfied smirk, folded his arms over his plastron, and tilted his head back as he watched his fellow middle brother.

"Normally, the best way to deal with flashbacks is to identify an individual's triggers and then take steps to avoid them," Donnie continued quietly before meeting Raph's gaze. "However, my triggers seem to be centered around conflict. In our lives, and especially right now, it will be impossible for me to avoid those kinds of situations. So, desensitizing myself to them is my only recourse. And that's never going to happen if I stay down here."

The smirk on Raph's face evaporated, and he leveled his head so he could better meet Donnie's eyes. "Of course it will! You just need to start sparring again. Me, Leo, and Mikey, we'll all help get you back in fighting form!"

"And how long will that take?" Donnie cut Raph off with a deliberate calm while he rested one hand on the desk in front of him and the other on his hip. "Weeks? Months?" The genius let his questions hang in the air for two heartbeats before he added, "…Years?"

Raph slammed his hands on the desk again so that they flanked Donnie's hand. The action put his face inches from his brother's. "You don't know that it'll take that long!"

"Just as you don't know it won't," Donnie countered, his voice maintaining his calm even as his eyes narrowed. "The point I'm trying to make is it doesn't matter how long it takes. It will be too long to stop the Kraang."

A menacing growl rumbled out of Raph, and he glared at his fellow middle brother.

The more timid turtle didn't even flinch.

"Alright, Donnie," Leo spoke up as he came around the desk. He grabbed Raph's shoulders so he could pull the two turtles out their stare-down. "You've made several good points and given us a lot to think about." He then dragged the red masked turtle away from the desk and turned him towards the door. "But, right now, we need to get ready for evening patrol. Right, Raph?"

The brawny ninja shrugged his shoulders, throwing Leo's hands off him. "Whatever," he ground out before marching out the lab doors.

"Make sure you dress warmly! Weather channel said it's gonna dip into the thirties tonight," the leader called after his irritable brother. He received a gruff, acknowledging grunt for his efforts.

The blue banded ninja turned and considered his youngest brothers for a moment before saying, "Mikey, I want you to stay with Donnie."

"You got it, dude!" the smallest turtle called in response.

"What!?" Donnie cried, all traces of annoyance still lingering on his face vanished in an instant. He scrambled over his desk, rushed to his oldest brother, and grabbed him by his shoulders. "Leo, you can't be serious!"

"As a heart attack," Leo returned, his face settling into a stern frown. "You shouldn't be alone right now."

Donnie let out a brief scoff before he spat out, "I'm not gonna do anything rash!"

"I believe you, bro. But, I'd feel better if you had someone stay with you tonight," Leo said, refusing to back down. A small smile played on his lips. "Besides, I don't think I could get Mikey to leave your side right now if I tried." He raised his voice as he said, "Isn't that right, Mikey?"

"Yuppers!" the orange clad turtle agreed as he bounced over to his brothers and pulled his mask back into its proper place. "Sticking to you like glue, Donnie."

Tears began to well in the genius' terrified brown eyes. "Please Leo. It's been taking everything the three of you have just to come home in one piece. You can't afford to be down another turtle!"

Leo could feel his second youngest brother's hands tremble against his shoulders. His blue eyes softened and he brought his hands up to gently cup the purple clad turtle's face between them. "It'll be alright, Donnie. We'll be careful. I promise."

Before the more intellectual ninja could say another word, his leader pulled away.

"Make sure Donnie eats something while we're out," Leo ordered as he marched toward the lab doors.

Mikey stood straighter and gave Leo an exaggerated salute. "Roger Dodger!"

Whoo…a lot to take in, huh? What do you guys think? Does Donnie's plan have merit? Or is it just desperate ramblings? As for whether or not Leo gives the OK for this plan to proceed…well you'll just have to wait until the next chapter! ;)

Thanks again for reading! An extra thank you to everyone who has stuck with and continues to stick with me on this journey. I really appreciate you all! And one more, special thanks to CJtheStoryteller. You help me through the worst of times, hon; even if you don't feel like you do. ILY!