AN: I hope you like this story and that I am not stepping on too many toes with this. I know that not everyone likes Tom/Mary stories, but I hope that some of you will be able to enjoy this. It does not only focus on the relationship between Mary and Tom but also on the relationship between Robert and Tom.

This is the first chapter, there are a few more to come.

Please let me know what you think!

Kat

He has been waiting for his son-in-law for almost an hour now. The boy returned from Boston two days ago and he is only staying for four weeks and there are so many things he wants to show him and talk to him about.

He is also a little worried that Tom is sick. Sybbie told him that her father almost constantly threw up on the ship, Tom of course did not mention that, but he did look a bit peaky. So he decides to check on him. If Tom really is sick, they should get Dr. Clarkson to examine him.

He knocks on Tom's door and hears a grunt in reply and so he opens the door and what he sees makes his heart stop beating and his head turn as read as a tomato.

"Oh dear God, excuse me," he says and shuts the door again.

He needs to clear his head and as it is obvious that Tom won't be joining him any time soon, he decides to take a walk. Before he has even left the house, he literally runs into his wife who looks slightly taken aback and says an indignant "Robert".

"I am sorry. I was just, I don't know what I was." He feels his wife scrutinize him and feels her take his arm and stir him outside. Once they are out of earshot she turns to him and asks

"What is it?"

He considers not telling her, it would shock her, but then again, this concerns their son-in-law and one of their daughters, so she really has a right know.

"I just wanted to get Tom, see whether he was alright. We wanted to leave an hour ago but he never came downstairs and because Sybbie said that he had been sick on the ship, I thought that he might not have been feeling well. I knocked on his door and heard a grunt and then I opened the door because I thought that he was sick and still in bed. And he was in bed. But not by himself. Mary was there with him and they were not sleeping. Or talking." All this has just tumbled out of his mouth and he is infinitely glad that Cora was the first person he ran into because she is the only person he can talk to like that.

"That is unexpected," his wife says. "Although understandable." He turns to her in disbelieve but listens to her explain why she thinks that it is understandable. And he can't help but agree with her. At the end of their long conversations he tells her that he won't ask either Tom or Mary any questions, that he will pretend that he hasn't seen anything and Cora agrees with him.

"That is a very good plan," she says.

However, he has to throw that very good plan overboard when Tom approaches him after lunch and asks for 'a word'.

"About what you saw," Tom starts but he cuts him off.

"Tom, please don't. I don't want to hear it." But Tom shakes his head.

"I just wanted to apologize. I should not have done that. I should have, I don't know what I should have." Tom looks utterly helpless and he wants to tell him to never mention it again, because he really does not want to think about his daughter doing what she was obviously doing, but then again, Mary is 34 years old and Tom a decent man. A decent man who feels incredibly guilty now.

"Tom. Don't apologize to me. Mary is 34 years old. She knows what she is doing. She has been married, she has a son. And although I still want to protect her whenever possible, this is not an area in which I should interfere. Not anymore. If she was nineteen or twenty, I'd throw you out of this house, but not now."

Tom looks at him questioningly and his hopes of being done with talking about this topic vanish into thin air and he takes a deep breath before continuing to speak.

"Tom, you've lived in my house long enough for me not to be able to pretend that I didn't know how important certain things are." Tom can't help but chuckle and he knows that he is turning bright read but he still continues.

"I can't ask you to live like a monk and I can't ask Mary to live like a nun although I would like both of you to do exactly that until you were married again. Maybe I am old fashioned, but I do believe that certain things should only be done within a marriage. But I have been very happily married for 35 years now and that is nothing that can be said for either you or Mary. You have both suffered a kind of loss the pain of which I can only dimly imagine. And I know that you need to deal with that somehow and neither Cora nor I have any right to interfere."

"So Cora knows."

He nods and Tom grins at him. "I am not surprised."

"Neither Cora nor I have any right to judge Mary or you. And we don't." Tom nods at that and stares into the distance.

"There is just one thing Tom. I am sure that both Mary and you know how to be careful, but should Mary become pregnant despite that, promise me to marry her. And to do your best to make her happy."

Tom nods and says "Of course."

They keep walking in silence for a while until Tom turns to him.

"So you think we could be happy?"

"What?" He has no idea what Tom is talking about.

"So you think that Mary and I could be happy."

He wonders what to say because this is something he hasn't talked to Cora about, it is something he hasn't even considered and he doesn't know what to think about it.

"Why do you ask?"

Tom swallows and then looks at him.

"It is something I have been thinking about."

"Why? Have you fallen in love with her?" It is something he can't imagine. Tom can't have fallen for Mary, it does not make any sense.

"No. I haven't fallen in love with her. Not the way I fell in love with Sybil. That was head-over-heels; it made me unable to think of anything else for years."

"Then why did you ask?"

"There was a woman in America. Caitlin. I thought I had fallen in love with her. She was very nice, she liked Sybbie, she had a good head on her shoulders, she was beautiful. And I am sure she liked me very much. I asked her to come here with me, I offered to pay, I can afford it, but she didn't understand. I told her that Downton was a part of me, that it would always be a part of me because Sybil would always be a part of me. Caitlin never asked me to forget about Sybil, but she did not understand that I would always love Sybil, that a part of my heart would always belong to her."

"And that makes it difficult for you to find someone."

"It makes it almost impossible. And Mary feels the same. We've been through the same, almost exactly the same. She will always love Matthew as I will always love Sybil. But that does not have to mean that we can never love anyone else. It will just be a lot harder than the first time around. But not all happy marriages begin with the husband and wife falling head-over-heels for each other."

He knows that Tom is saying or rather what he is asking.

"No. Certainly not."

"How did you make it work?"

He feels very uncomfortable talking to Tom about this. For a moment he thinks that it is none of Tom's business, but Sybil and possibly Mary and Edith probably already told him quite a lot and Tom is a member of the family.

"We wanted it to work and put in the effort. We spent time together, just the two of us, even it was very uncomfortable at first because we didn't really know what to do with each other. But we found out we had a lot of things in common and we built on that. And at some point I just realized that I loved her. Cora had become an integral part of my life without me even realizing it."

He is very thankful to Tom for looking the other way now. He does not want the boy to see the emotions on his face. He feels so embarrassed.

"Mary and I have a lot in common."

"You live on different continents." He hopes Tom does not plan on taking Mary to America with him.

"Only if Sybbie and I return to Boston."

"Are you thinking about not returning?" He doesn't even dare to hope for that.

"Yes. Sybbie does not feel at home in Boston. She kept asking about when we would return home. She is so young and in three quarters of a year she did not get used to a new home. And she was so happy when I told her we'd come here. She told everyone she met that we were finally going home and that she'd finally be with Donk and Granny again. It was embarrassing. Or it would have been if she hadn't been so cute. And there is nothing that keeps me in Boston. But a lot that would keep me here."

"Like Mary."

"Yes. But not only her. I've missed everyone, even your mother."

This makes him laugh and he wonders if he should tell him that his mother missed him too.