"Happy Valentine's Day, sweetie." Jenny wished as Gibbs strolled into the kitchen

"Yeah, yeah." Gibbs grumbled

"Listen, I made you a waffle sandwich with bacon and sausage." Jenny laughed as she held out the plate

"Wow. I have died and gone to heaven." Gibbs exclaimed in happiness, "At least I will if I keep eating like this."

"Almost as sweet as what I got you." Gibbs said as he swung a gift bag onto the counter, proceeding with his sandwich to the table

"Oh, Gibbs, seriously?" Jenny gaped

"Very good, Dad. Nice to see you stepping up." Kate complimented as she caught their exchange

"Oh, that's not for Valentine's Day. I don't believe in Valentine's Day." Gibbs clarified as he bit into his sandwich with a moan

"Yeah, we know." Jenny muttered

"Is a fake howiday." Andy announced

"Invented by?" Gibbs spoke between bites

"The flower and greeting-card cartel." Eric recited dutifully

"A stun gun?" Jenny blurted as she fished out her gift

"Unbelievable!" Kate declared

"Not just a stun gun, a great one. That thing will take down a moose." Gibbs explained, "You want to try it out?"

"Yeah, I kind of do." Jenny glared as she toyed with the gun

"You got your wife a taser for Valentine's Day?" Kate echoed in disbelief

"It's not for Valentine's Day." Gibbs insisted

"Yeah, it's also not romantic." Kate informed her father gently

"I got her something to protect her when I'm not around. There's nothing more romantic than that." Gibbs objected around his breakfast

"This is way more romantic than stupid, old perfume or jewellery." Jenny noted sarcastically

"Jewellery is just a mugger magnet, honey." Gibbs pacified

"Thanks for my taser. It's stunning!" Jenny drawled

"Andy, what do we say about puns?" Gibbs coached

"Wowest form of comdy." Eric quipped with thumbs down and Gibbs smirked before he left.

"After all these years, still , huh?" Kate giggled as she toyed with the taser

"Can somebody get that?!" Jenny yelled when the doorbell rang before she continued

"You know, it's okay, honey. I'm used to your father's practical gifts. I actually liked the coin sorter he got me last year." Jenny shrugged

"Yeah, but once in a while, wouldn't it be great to get something personal and frivolous?" Kate inquired

"Is anybody gonna get the door?!" Abby asked as she came down the stairs

"I was fixing breakfast!" Jenny replied as she made her way to the door

"I was fixing this!" Abby indicated her face wildly

"I was fixing to get the door, but I figured somebody else would." Ziva stated as she lounged on the couch, watching TV

"Oh, hey! Tim got me flowers!" Abby squealed happily

"There's no card." Jenny stated in confusion

"What kind of an idiot forgets the card?" Kate asked in exasperation

"Hey, Tim got Abby flowers." Ziva teased

"No, we don't know that. They could be for anybody." Jenny maintained, "Gosh, they're beautiful."

"Well, we know they're not for Ziva." Abby said confidently

"And why not?" Ziva retorted, eyes narrowing

"Guys don't usually send flowers to girls they're afraid of." Abby chirped

"They do if they know what's good for 'em." Ziva said dangerously

"And we know Dad didn't buy them for Mom." Kate interjected

"Oh, you know what? Fine, rub it in. But good luck to you lovebirds when you're trying to sort coins by hand." Jenny grunted

"Since you don't even live here, these babies got to be for mwah." Abby concluded

"Now that I think about it, I think that these flowers might be for me." Kate observed

"Kate, you live with Daniel. Why would he send flowers here?" Jenny wondered

"No, he didn't, and Daniel already gave me my present this morning." Kate gloated

"Gross." Ziva hollered

"And a single red rose on my pillow." Kate continued dreamily

"Gross and cheap." Ziva amended

"Actually, I think these flowers might be from my boss." Kate hypothesized

"The successful and dreamy Samuel Baker." Abby chimed

"Uh, honey, listen. Is there something going on between you and Samuel Baker?" Jenny asked in horror

"No, no, no, but I just think he's really hung up on me, and it would be so his style to send flowers here anonymously." Kate explained quickly, disgusted that Jenny had even considered the idea

"Well, it seems like somebody has a pretty high opinion of herself, which is a very unflattering trait. Plus, it's kind of my thing." Abby pointed out

"Samuel's been really attentive lately. He's been walking me to my car every night." Kate continued

"Yeah, but you are carrying the bank deposit for the restaurant. Maybe he's being attentive to his money." Jenny reasoned

"You know what? That's it. All this talk about these stupid flowers I want in on some of this Valentine's swag." Ziva said as she stood abruptly and headed for the door. "I think it's time for me to go out and get myself a real boyfriend."

"It's not like going to the pound and picking out a puppy." Jenny contributed

"You kidding? I'll have this locked down by dinner." Ziva snickered

"I'd be very afraid to be a teenage boy right about now." Kate shuddered

"Happy Valentine's, sweetie!" Tim wished as he leaned against his bed

"Aww, thank you so much for that huge bouquet of roses you sent me!" Abby gushed

"Oh, my God! You would be so welcome. You know if I had actually done that." Tim replied startled

"Oh, so they were for Kate." Abby murmured

"I'll give you your present when I see you tonight." Tim put in, "I am job hunting so I gotta go."

"Good bye Timmy," Abby purred

"Bye, Abs"

"I think that Valentine's Day takes the spontaneity out of love. When I give Jenny a surprise romantic gesture, she knows it's authentic." Gibbs was defending his refusal to celebrate the day with Mike at their morning coffee shop

"When was your last surprise romantic gesture?" Mike asked in shock

"I sent her a little arrangement of roses just today." Gibbs mentioned victoriously

"I'm confused now. You don't celebrate Valentine's Day." Mike said slowly

"That's what makes it a surprise! She's not expecting it." Gibbs tried

"Because you don't celebrate Valentine's Day." Mike finished

"Exactly. Making it a surprise." Gibbs declared

"Today's Valentine's Day. Everybody sends flowers." Mike maintained

"I don't. Thus the surprise." Gibbs tried again

"All right. Let me follow this. Now, for 25 years, you've been crapping on Valentine's Day because it's not spontaneous. This year, you buy her flowers, thus making it spontaneous." Mike pondered

"Listen to me. I'm the only guy on the planet that can surprise his wife with flowers On Valentine's Day." Gibbs emphasised

"It's ingenious!" Mike decided, "I'm still getting Andy tonight?"

"Yeah. He's –uhm-excited." Gibbs stuttered as he looked for the right adjective

"Finally, somebody appreciates Uncle Mike." Mike smiled

"He actually prefers Amira." Gibbs chuckled at Mike's sudden scowl

"Gentlemen, I've invited you here today because I've decided it's time for me to have a real boyfriend." Ziva addressed the two boys in the classroom

"Um, I-I-I got a note to come here." A third boy said holding out the piece of paper

"Grab some chair, DiNozzo." Ziva ordered

"I'm here to congratulate the three of you on being finalists for the position of Ziva's boyfriend." Ziva announced

"When I look around this room, it's an honor just being nominated." A nerdy boy named Jacob spoke up

"Wait. This says the principal wanted to see me. Did you steal this from his office?" Tony asked as he took a seat

"I'll ask the questions here." Ziva barked, "Look, I know all three of you like me, but…"

"Uh, for the record, I've liked you since third grade, and I can prove it! I keep a pretty detailed diary." Jacob spoke up again, rooting around in his backpack for said diary

"Enough of the chitchat, ladies. We only got an hour here. There's going to be a multiple-choice quiz, a fitness test, and a short essay on the topic 'Ziva - smart girl who's pretty or pretty girl who's smart?'' Ziva filled in

"Or pretty girl who's lost her mind." Tony exclaimed, "Look, Ziva. I like you, okay? And if you want to go out sometime, then you know where to find me. But I'm not gonna jump through hoops for you."

"Hey, wait. You can opt out on the hoops and just do the rope climb, I mean…" Ziva yelled at his retreating back before she returned to the room

"So, we are completely booked for tonight." Samuel announced as he entered the back room

"Yeah? I bet you wish every day was Valentine's Day." Kate noted

"Uh, no. I'd go broke buying gifts for my Valentine." Samuel grimaced

"Uh, a-about that. That was the biggest bouquet I have ever seen." Kate revealed

"Huh?"

"You're gonna make me say it, aren't you? Uh look, uh, I th-think you're a really great guy." Kate sputtered

"Thanks! I'm glad I could pull that out of you." Samuel sighed

"But you have to know how happy I am with Daniel."

"Kate, I think there's been a misunderstanding."

"Am I misunderstanding you walking me to my car every night?"

"You carry the bank deposit."

"Obviously, it's very flattering that you're still so into me, but you need to move on."

"I'm getting so many compliments on my new bracelet, Samuel!" A woman screeched as she bounded into Samuel's arms, "Isn't it beautiful?"

"Oh, wow! That's so beautiful, Rachel!"

"You did know that Rachel and I were a thing, right?" Samuel iterated

"Of course! I am the assistant manager around here. I am on top of everything." Kate managed to say before fleeing

"Abby, Tim's here!" Ziva yelled

"It's Tim? Why didn't you let him in?!" Abby demanded of Ziva

"It's not my boyfriend. I got my own ball and chain to deal with." Ziva scoffed as she walked away

"Well, don't even think about cooking dinner, because I brought it home." Gibbs announced as he came through the door

"That is sweet, because I am exhausted." Jenny sighed turning slightly to see their dinner, "Hot dogs?!"

"Yeah! I saw this guy on YouTube cook these by tasering them." Gibbs explained excitedly, " Then, if it stops raining, we can go out and see if we can blow up this watermelon."

"And they say every love story's already been told." Jenny muttered before making her voice clear again, "Listen, uh, honey, I'm sorry, but, uh, I gave the taser away."

"Why would you give away my gift?" Gibbs demanded

"It's not like it was some kind of special Valentine's Day present. I gave it to Kate." Was Jenny's only response as she sorted the mail

"I mean, we could boil these hot dogs, but no one's gonna watch that on YouTube." Gibbs grumbled as he followed Jenny to the living room.

"Hey! Some beautiful flowers there." Gibbs complimented , "Somebody must be excited and appreciative."

"There was no card." Jenny told him

"What?"

"I know we don't do Valentine's Day, but I got to tell you, when these arrived, it was a little like rubbing salt in a wound."
"And lemon."
"And alcohol."

"Why don't you just say Margarita? I don't know what happened to the card, honey. I sent you those flowers."

"Okay." Jenny choked out between her fits of laughter

"Honey, I sent those flowers! I tell you I tell you, I got a receipt! Let me show you! I got a receipt."

"Yeah, after 22 years, I know the guy I married!" Jenny chuckled at his show of tearing apart his desk

"Right there I got a receipt." Gibbs held the receipt up victoriously and read, "It says right there. Stun gun."

Gibbs' face contorted when he realised that it was the wrong receipt

"This is ridiculous! You send flowers, you lose the card? What's up?" Gibbs grumbled as he continued his search through his desk

"I'll get it!" Ziva cried as she bolted down the stairs in time to open the door

"Hi, Ziva."

"Wow. Truffles. Nice." Ziva commented as the gift was thrust into her hands

"Uh, sit there and don't put your feet on anything." Ziva instructed as she let the boy into the house.

"Uh, who's this?" Jenny asked as she looked away from Gibbs' theatrics.

"Oh, this is my new boyfriend, Jacob but by a narrow margin. Could have gone either way." Ziva said with a shrug as she took a seat on the couch

"Hello, Mrs. Gibbs. You have a beautiful home." Jacob greeted, taking a seat himself

"Oh, thank you." Jenny said as she sat down too

"He's polite and writes a strong essay. But he's no arm wrestler, I'll tell you that." Ziva mentioned

"Got to hand it to you, Ziva. You actually brought home a boyfriend for Valentine's Day." Jenny complimented in slight surprise

"Yeah. Said I would. And I don't mess around. I'm gonna go get a soda." Ziva decided as she walked to the kitchen

"Can I get you anything, Jacob?!" Jenny exclaimed, horrified by Ziva's hospitability

"Oh, he's fine. He's got to get us reservations somewhere. Last-minute on Valentine's Day. We'll see what kind of juice this kid's got." Ziva glared at Jacob who immediately whipped out his phone.

"Hey, Daniel. Squirt." Ziva greeted casually as they entered through the back door

"Having a good Valentine's Day?" Daniel asked

"Oh, yeah. My boyfriend's taking me out tonight. Uh, he's in the living room if you want to go take a look at him." Ziva offered

"I want to take a look at him!" Eric yelled as he ran to the living room

"Where are you taking Kate tonight?" Ziva asked, making sure that Daniel was on top of his game.

"Ah, Kate is working tonight."

"And you're okay with that?"

"Uh yeah! Why wouldn't I be?"

"Uh, well, apparently, that Samuel Baker guy's into her."

"He wants to "hit that." It's an expression. You know, it means that he…"

"Yeah, I know what it means."

"He got her that big-ass bouquet in there." Ziva pointed to the bouquet which now lay on the coffee table.

"Samuel really sent her those?"

"Yeah. He walks her to her car every night, too. I have a boyfriend now, so I know how these animals operate."

"Yeah, uh, I'll be back later to pick up Eric." Daniel said to Jenny who entered the kitchen

"Oh, yeah, no problem. Got no special plans. I'll just be here sorting coins." Jenny grumbled as she made some coffee

"Hey, uh, Jacob, could you go get me a snack? Cheese, on crackers the round ones, not the saltines?" Ziva practically demanded of Jacob. Jacob immediately headed to the kitchen.

"Nice catch. Thought you wanted a boyfriend, not a butler." Jenny started as she took a seat next to Ziva

"It's love, Mom. He's all things to me."

"I'm just wondering, long term, how happy you're going to be with a guy who does everything you tell him to."

"Well, so far, I've kind of enjoyed it. I mean the guy got me candy on Valentine's Day. Dad got you a taser." Ziva said as if it were obvious

"No, your father is romantic. It's just he shows his love in ways that that that don't look anything like love."

"Mom, come on. I-I-I saw. You were disappointed when these flowers weren't for you."

"I mean, I sure, yeah. I mean, I there's a part of me that wishes your father would do what's predictable and expected, like Valentine's Day flowers, but honey, I am so much happier being with a guy who doesn't jump through hoops just because somebody invented a holiday!"

"Okay! I've arranged the crackers into a heart, and the cheese is the arrow." Jacob revealed as he came into the living room

"Jacob we've always been honest with each other, you know?" Ziva started gently, "Yeah, it's over."

"I should have seen this coming. I guess I was just hoping." Jacob said as he stood again

"Let's not draw this out." Ziva ordered as she walked him to the door

"Hey, it was nice meeting you, Jacob." Jenny said as Jacob walked down the lawn

"Oh, wait, uh, , I found this in your bushes." Jacob said as he handed her a white card.

"What's all this about?" Gibbs asked when he saw Jenny toying with the card

"Uh, Ziva's Ex-boyfriend, uh, just Found the card for the flowers." Jenny said, "It says, To Jenny There's, uh there's a message. "

"Maybe I have some romance left in me, huh?" Gibbs drawled from his leaning position

Bet you didn't see this coming.
Ha!
In your face.

Love, Jethro.

"Jethro, thank you!" Jenny teared as she practically leapt into his arms

"Happy February 14th!" Gibbs wished as he held Jenny close

"Here," Tim said as he pulled a notebook out of his pocket

"What's this?" Abby asked in surprise as they reached the front door

"This is my book, a mini printed edition," Tim explained, "There is only one of this copy and it's for you."

"That is amazing," Abby agreed as she opened the book. She flipped through it while they entered the house until the dedication caught her eye.

Abigail, you are the best girlfriend any guy could hope for and I want to remember our story forever. Parts of this book will keep our story alive forever yet at the same time take our relationship further.

Yours Forever, Tim

"That is so lame!" Ziva exclaimed as she saw the book with a bow

"No, that actually took a lot of thought."

"Followed immediately by complete absence of thought."

"You know what? That's actually the perfect gift. I would rather have a boyfriend who listens to me and makes me a heartfelt gift instead of going into debt buying something expensive and stupid."

"Am I the only one who gets this holiday?"

"What are you doing?" Abby asked as Tim knelt in front of her

"This was my grandmother's." He said as he held up the ring

"It's beautiful." Abby complimented

"Next to you, it's the thing that means the most to me in my life." Tim began, hoping to make the proposal as sweet as he could before something occurred to him, "Abigail Gibbs…Oh, shoot. Hang on. I got to ask your dad something."

"No, no, no, no, no. I'm good. Jenny's good. We're all good in here." Gibbs managed to yell from the living room

"Thank you, sir." Tim returned to his kneeling position, "Abigail Gibbs, will you marry me?"

"Yes." Abby squealed as she threw her arms around him

"Isn't love beautiful?" Jenny sniffled

"Yeah. Young love is." Gibbs mumbled, "Come on. Come on, let's get you cleaned up."

"You sure you don't want me to walk you to your car?" Samuel asked as they exited the restaurant

"Oh, uh, no. I'm covered." Kate said as she held up her taser

"Hey, lady." Kate heard a voice drawl from the shadows

"Aah!" Kate cried as she fired the taser in the general area, only to see Daniel fall to the ground, "Oh, my gosh! I'm so sorry! I'm so…. You scared the crap out of me, Daniel!"

"I haven't checked yet, but I think I'm in the same boat!" Daniel choked out

"Kate, you okay? What happened?" Samuel asked as he rounded the corner again

"I accidentally tased Daniel. He's fine. You should go."

"No, stick around!" Daniel tried to yell, "Give me 5 minutes to get up to my feet, and then I'm gonna kick your ass!"

"Daniel, honey, nothing is going on between me and Samuel, okay?" Kate pacified

"Yeah, th-that's right. There's no way I can compete with you." Samuel said before fleeing

"Oh, honey, flowers?" Kate praised as she lifted the bouquet

"Customarily, at this point in the Valentine's festivities, the man and the woman retire to the bedchamber. But I know how you feel about mandatory romantic gestures, so…" Jenny trailed off suggestively

"Hey, hey, say no more. This is one area where Jethro Gibbs and agree." Gibbs whispered as he kissed Jenny again, "Hmm. Let's go to bed."

"You know, Gibbs, these flowers really are beautiful." Jenny said as they shut off the lights, "You act tough, but you're a softy."

"Not a word I'd like used to describe me in this present situation. But a little romance is not the worst thing in the world." Gibbs decided finally, "That is the worst thing in the world."

"Oh, that's that cute boy Tony DiNozzo from Junior ROTC and soccer!" Jenny exclaimed as she caught a glimpse of them in the porch light

"So, Kate is happily married with two children, Abby and Tim are getting married and Ziva is going to be going off to college," Gibbs recapped as he banged on the door

"Andy has a girlfriend who he's ditching us for," Jenny interjected with a smile

"What can I say; he gets it from his dad." Gibbs laughed before he lifted Jenny up ignoring her squeals and carried her to bed.

Where should Ziva go to college? Please read and review. I am not American so all information is researched and therefore not accurate.