Summary: I did not die, just to be reborn as a pink little menace whose job is to fangirl over some emo what's-his-name unable pull himself together.

Tag(s): OC, OC-reincarnates-as-Sakura, gender dysphoria

4. things don't go as planned

After that weird, brief meeting with one of the clan heads of Konoha, which was as random as finding an Easter egg during Christmas, I felt the need to know more about the clans.

Frankly speaking, I've never been much of a politics or manipulation kind of guy, nor did I take notice of the upper echelon, but being born into a world where ninjas rule and everyone else is basically helpless is frightening because I've known since day one – the very moment I realized I was Sakura and connected the dots – that this world, was like ancient Japan.

While I didn't know which era it was, I do know that in ancient Japan, the samurai lords or some fancy-ass-name ruled and were in power while the civilians, or known as the commoners, were never needed in the equation. Murder was very common in those days and no one really cared if a street rat died, as long as their corpse didn't dirty the roads. There was no women's rights either, like any beginning of a land and if it wasn't someone important who died or something, it wasn't important enough to look into it. There were a whole lot of power struggles, betrayals, assassinations, corruption and whatnot in the inner court and some samurai lords didn't even rule through a whole decade before they were eventually "mysteriously killed". Some didn't even reach their adulthoods before they eventually died.

Now, some may think it's strange of me to think that way. But if you think about it, ninjas were the samurais and the Kages were the samurai lords. They held the power over the non-ninjas, but instead of that honor hypocrisy bullshit, ninjas were more of mercenaries, because ninjas took up jobs. That meant that they based things off on the pay for missions, because they killed for protection or whatever else others hire ninjas for and in turn, the clients give the cash.

Kages are the ones who keep track of his or her ninjas and is the sole leader everyone must follow. The village is the organization that held all the ninjas together and the civilians were the ones who kept things running, because ninjas didn't do farming, trading and produce things.

But if Kages are the "true" leaders, then what would that make the clan heads? Sure, they oversee their own kin and work in the system as excellent ninjas, but how do they matter in the entire village system, where they are leaders in their own right but don't have a "higher" seat, which is the Hokage? There were more ninja clans than civilian clans in Konoha, because Konoha's history consisted of making alliances, which brought these clans together to form the village. Civilian clans only came later when Konoha was up and running because by then, they could do their merchant business.

So, why hasn't an Inuzuka, Akimichi, Yamanaka, Nara, Aburame, Uchiha or a Hyuga become Hokage? Well, it has been a fair system, but in the end, the Hokage's words are law. So far, there has only been two Senjus, a Sarutobi and a Namikaze, which I'm not sure if it's a real clan or not. Was it because they weren't charismatic enough or well-known throughout the village? Was it because they weren't skillful or strong?

Then again, it could be some plothole of the story, yet I refused to accept it as such. This was my reality now, which means there should be a logical explanation somewhere.

This place was no longer the peaceful world I had grown up in, where information is passed around without a care via internet and instead of using it for world domination, we use it for watching silly cat videos. Here, people would die just to protect the name of a fellow ninja.

There had to be more to becoming a ninja than just friendships, training and mastering one of the three jutsu categories. There had to be more than just motivational speeches said on the fly or silly, two-dimensional villains. There had to be more, because this world began from somewhere, like how my world began with dinosaurs.

Like hell I'd involve myself into more troublesome things like ninja politics, if they do exist. But I can't just let my curiosity burn me every time I'm reminded of it.

. . .

"Tou-san!" I called out to my father while running towards him, who had his arms open to catch me. It was still weird being child-like and short. "Welcome back!" I greeted with a grin.

Haruno Kizashi was definitely less strict than my previous father. He was way too goofy despite his profession, though I took it in stride, because hey, quirks. If I could get used to his ridiculous hairstyle, I could get used to him acting like a dork and dressing in hobo clothing when he was off-duty.

"Hey there, Saku-tan!" he smiled at me, full of teeth as he lifted me high. I tried not to roll my eyes at the honorific and being carried. It was much more horrifying than '-chan', but I couldn't get him to change it no matter how hard I tried. Apparently, I was his 'little cherry blossom'. Forever and ever and ever. Eugh. "Missed me?"

I laughed and replied cheekily. "Nope!" I stuck my tongue out at him. Strangely enough, it was natural for me to act like a child. It was probably because I was technically a child anyways in all but spirit.

He faked his hurt, but I could tell that he was amused.

"Ow, you wound this strong ninja, Saku-tan!" he lamented, which was dramatic of Shakespearian proportions. "What will I tell the guys when I go back to duty that I've been wounded by my own kid? The horror and humiliation!"

I sniggered, enjoying the humor. But this wasn't the time for that.

"Tou-san, I gotta ask you something." I tugged his kimono-shirt. He looked down at me, curious. "What do the clan heads do?"

He looked surprised by my question. Most likely because of the fact that I was still five and therefore should not know what a clan head was.

"Well, clan heads look after their own clans." He started, though I already knew it. I didn't say anything but gestured for him to continue. "And they have their own specializations too."

"Like?" I asked excitedly. I didn't know about the specializations thing. The clans were just… sort of there, you know? Though, the Uchihas have their own police force, which could be categorized under their specialization, right? I feel kind of an idiot for not noticing it, but I could beat up myself over it later.

"The Akimichis have a big role in the food business and in the taijutsu corps." He says and I nodded in understanding.

It makes sense, now that I think about it. Akimichis are large in size not because of obesity, but because of their techniques which require large mass to attempt them. Big bones are also part of their genes and they eat more than the average ninja because they use a lot of chakra even though they use taijutsu. I think it's because they have special techniques that involve a unique way of molding their chakra.

"Inuzukas specialize in tracking and retrieval. All of their clan members are partnered with a dog or more and they are all trained to track since young. They have a better sense of smell than most ninjas." Inuzukas were the easiest to guess. Like in the world I was in, dogs were also used to solve crime, sniff out drugs and find missing people. In this world, however, it was probably to track down runaway ninjas and enemies.

"Well, that's all I can explain." he said apologetically. "Until you go to the Academy, I can't really teach you, since I might say too much. Though if you want to know more, there's a civilian book on ninja clans in the library."

"Okay." I conceded. I was his child, so he might try to tell me more than he should, because he adored me. "I'll go there now."

"Alright." He chuckled, finally put me down and ruffled my hair. Now my head looked like a weasel decided to roll around in it before leaving for better grounds to sleep on. "Off you go and remember, come back before–"

I interrupted. "Before evening or kaa-san will get angry, 'kay!" I shouted as I ran out of the door.

. . .

You have no idea how much I miss Google. I always researched using the internet and never really set foot into a library for source material. It was so hard to filter through the useless crap and I couldn't even separate the useful text from it. I couldn't Photostat, highlight and I couldn't copy paste to print it out for my own reference either.

A life without internet was terrible. Bearable, but absolutely horrible.

I sighed, deciding to take another option. I rather not stay here and blind myself from squinting too much. This library, compared to the other libraries I've been to before, was actually uncomfortable to be in. I might as well borrow the book and make my own notes from it, so I can understand it easier.

I walked up to the counter and knocked. Sadly, I was too short to be seen. "Excuse me, ma'm," I said politely. "I want to borrow these books." I showed her the two books I was holding. They were kind of heavy, so I hoped she hurry it up. My little arms were too little for books, which sucked.

She blinked in surprise. Thought a kid like me would be outside playing in the mud instead of reading, huh? "Oh, hello, dear." She greeted back at me. "Do you have a library card?"

I felt embarrassed. I wanted to borrow books, but managed to forget I needed some form of identification for it, which was a library card. God damn it. "Um, no. Can I get one now?"

"Sure, dear!" she responded happily. At least she wasn't laughing. That would be mortifying and as a child, I was more sensitive than I should be on a normal basis over the smallest of things. "What's your name?"

"Haruno Saku." I responded as quickly as lightning, not at all guilty that I wasn't actually giving her my full name. What would a name matter if I couldn't see it as my own?

"Oh, alright." She took out a simple, small green card and wrote my name on the front. Then she opened it and poised her pen as she asked, "What are the titles of the books you want to borrow?"

"The Clans of Konoha and Konoha History." Like I said earlier, they were pretty heavy and if this took any longer than it should, I think I would fall.

"Good, here you go." She handed the card to me, which I took and quickly pocketed before I made the books slip out of my hands. "The return date is in the card, so do return before or on the day itself, or else you'll have to pay the late fine, okay?"

"Yes, ma'm, thank you." I did a slightly jerky bow before heading out of the library, trying the best I could to not accidentally drop the books.

As I reached to the main street, I took a left turn and walked. I might as well go home, since I didn't have a pen or book with me and I rather do my research at home than out in the open. I never liked people looking over my shoulder and asking me, "What are you doing?" because it always annoyed me and made me uneasy.

Somehow, I managed to memorize the routes I would have to take often, which was the main street, the marketplace, the restaurants' area, the playground and the way back home. Contrary to what I first thought, the playground and the way home was actually pretty near to each other, because they didn't take seven streets before I could finally reach either one of them.

Just as I decided to cross the playground, someone my size bumped into me and almost made me fell, but luckily I managed to negate that by using my foot to balance myself while the other planted itself firmly onto the grassy ground. Dropping the books would be like dropping a glass cup. You didn't want to do it no matter what.

"Hey, watch where you're going!" exclaimed the person who bumped into me rudely. It was a girl my age with purple hair and oh fuck- why was her hair asymmetrical? Did she cut her hair by herself and thought it was edgy, or something? It looked bizarre.

She looked at me. "Hmmph. No wonder my head hurts. A large forehead bumped into me."

I'd like to think that I'm mature enough to handle a situation like this as diplomatically as possible. No crying, no bloodshed. But, I'm kind of pissed because she insinuated that I was the one who purposely knocked into her, instead of it being the other way around. She was being a rude little shit too.

"Oh, excuse me, I see a dog," I said pleasantly with a smile on my face. Yep. I was not mature at all. "But I don't see it leashed. I wonder why?"

Her face turned deep red and she spluttered indignantly. Her hand lifted to point her index finger at me, but I was hardly intimidated. She was a five year old brat, for god's sake.

"You- you- ugly forehead!" she tried to insult me. Keyword; tried. "You don't have any fashion sense. How will you get others to like you, when you're too ugly to make friends?!"

"I'm five, not a twenty year old super model." I deadpanned. Wearing a simple t-shirt with a pair of grey pants and a pair of sandals was in no way unfashionable. Screw fashion anyways, I prefer practicality and comfort. "I don't need to attract other people when my body hasn't even developed yet."

"Well, ugly–"

"Well, dog," I interrupted, sidestepping away from her. I was not immature to the point that I would stay for a pointless argument. Not worth my effort either. "You're wasting my time and I have better things to do, so bye and I hope I'll never see you again." I walked away and she practically fumed behind me.

"You coward!" she screeched as she ran towards me.

Before she could tackle me to the ground, someone stopped her and the books I borrowed were spared from being acquainted with the grass and dirt.

"Now, a girl shouldn't throw herself at a boy at such a young age," said someone and I thought after last week, I'd never see him again. "It's very unladylike." I could hear the glee dripping from his voice. I was actually happy too, that he saw me as a boy.

I was still five, so it's still too early to be able to determine my "true" gender.

"Y-you're a boy…?" she squeaked fearfully and I raised an eyebrow. Sexist much? "B-b-but–"

"Yeah." I agreed nonchalantly, effectively putting a stop to her stuttering. It was true because I did see myself as a boy, never mind the outer, physical aspect.

"But you have pink hair!" she cried loudly.

"And you have uneven purple hair." I retorted, resisting the urge to snort. "I don't get to choose what hair color I have, but you can choose how to cut your hair. Isn't that unfair?"

Right after I said that, she turned away from mortification and ran away, until she was nothing but a speck in the distance.

"So much sass for a five year old." The voice said and I turned to look at him. It was hard to crane my head to really get a look at him, because he was just that tall. "Are you sure you're five?"

"I had five birthdays so far." I shrugged. Was he listening from the beginning? I'm starting to think that he's a stalker. "So, yeah, I'm five. Totally."

He gave me an amused look.

"So, Saku-kun, what brings you to the park with two heavy books?" he asked.

"Was on my way home, then I got attacked by that girl and she had some misconception that I was the one who decided to bulldoze her, instead of the other way around." It was nearing evening soon, so I had to go home. "Well, nice meeting you, Nara-san, but I gotta go back home–"

"Well, let me help you with that, Saku-kun," he said, offering a hand. I narrowed my eyes at it suspiciously. "Looks heavy."

But since he offered…

"... 'kay."

It's not like I suckered a clan head into helping me carry books or anything. Free of charge and offered with generosity.

All is well.

A/N: I'm just writing as I go, haha. This last part was kind of fun to write. Can you guess who was the girl that bumped into Saku? She's a canon character.

Thanks to xela521, general zargon, AceSakurai, LeechPrincess, Guest, Kitsu, Petalclaw's PatriceBethPorter and TangoDeltaBravo for reviewing the last chapter!