Over When It's Over

It's the first snap of the last straw,
Where regrets outlast the alcohol
It's a cold sweat, in an empty bed,
And dreams are like a knife,
When you're hanging by a thread
Ain't no "Maybe we can make it if we just play the right cards"

Over when it's Over, Eric Church

Jacob / Kylie

"Maybe you're being just a little insensitive towards Bella, Kylie? She's depressed. She needs people around her, not distancing themselves right now." Jacob explained to his girlfriend, Kylie as he looked at her, shook his head.

He didn't get it lately, it felt like he was torn between his best friend and her younger sister, his girlfriend. The strain was causing him to really question things between himself and Kylie lately, because it honestly just seemed as if she were being totally selfish. Which wasn't like her, not until recently, maybe in the past year or so, since her older sister and his best friend Bella moved back to Forks to live with Charlie and Kylie.

"No, Jacob, I'm not. A guy broke up with her.. That is not a reason to go into some kind of catatonic depressed state and spend all her time in her damned room staring out that damned window, giving me judgemental looks when we come back from spending time at La Push.. Look, I get that she's your friend but trust me.. This thing she's doing? It's all to make people feel sorry for her and pay attention to her. She's always done this, it's her thing!" Kylie insisted, looking up at Jacob.

She could feel the tears threatening to fall, she knew lately she was about to lose Jacob to her older sister. Of course, she'd seen the writing on the wall when her older sister moved back last year, and Jacob started to spend more and more time around Bella instead of with her.

"How do you even know that, really? I mean you visited Renee and your stepfather what, four times?" Jacob asked, his voice raising a little as he looked at Kylie and then over her shoulder, peering into Bella's bedroom where Bella sat, totally oblivious to anything around her it seemed.

"And every single time I went, Jacob, if I got even a smidge more attention than she did, she was sulling up, pouting, pretending to be hurt or sick or something.. Look, that's just the way she is. Believe me if you want to, if you don't want to then don't. Either way, I'm not trying to lie to you or something. I also don't see why we're fighting about this."

"Because, Kylie, I just think that maybe it'd be a good thing if she came to La Push with us tonight for the bonfire. It would be better for her than just sitting in her room and staring out her window, depressed. Are you even a little worried about her?"

"I am, actually.. But I'm not stupid enough to give her exactly what she wants, either. She's doing this to get your attention, Jake because she's only okay when you come to see me, any idiot can clearly see she's doing it for attention except for you of course.. Know what? I'm sick of arguing with you. All we do lately is fight.. If you want her to go to La Push? Take her.. But I'm not going with you."

"So you're going to make me choose now, Ky.. Really mature.. Fine. We're leaving."

"I'm not.. I wasn't making you choose.. That you could even think that, Jacob.. But hey, if you want to choose, I guess you just made your choice, huh? I'm done with it."

Kylie gaped at the things they'd just said to each other for a few moments as the color slowly drained from her face and she processed what he'd just done and what she'd felt like she was forced into doing as a result.. but he was basically doing what pretty much everyone else tended to do.. Tossing her aside in favor of her older sister. The prettier one, the smarter one, the better one. The one with less obvious problems until recently. And recently, it seemed as if she were milking her present problems to the fullest extent, extracting every bit of spare attention she could get out of it from pretty much everyone leaving Kylie, of course, to be ignored.. Just like she'd done covertly when they were kids and she'd visit her sister and mother in Phoenix.

"Jacob.."

"You said it, Kylie, not me." Jacob said quietly as he shook his head and turned to walk into Bella's room.

"FINE! I'M BETTER OFF WITHOUT YOU ANYWAY YOU FUCKING PRICK! I DON'T NEED YOU! WHEN I'M RIGHT JACOB, REMEMBER.. YOU CHOSE THIS." Kylie shouted as she took a few deep breaths, turned and walked into her room, making sure to slam the door as hard as humanly possible.

(Jacob)

Just A Dream

My lover, my life, my shawty, my wife
She left me, I'm tied
Cause I knew that it just ain't right

I was thinking bout her, thinkin' bout me
Thinkin' bout us, what we gon' be

Open My Eyes, It was only Just a Dream

Nelly, Just A Dream

From where he stood in Bella's room, Jacob sighed sadly and winced a little at the slamming door. For some strange reason it felt as if he might have just made the biggest mistake of his life and he found himself wishing he could go back and press rewind or something, stop the fight before it started.. But he couldn't, he knew that.

They'd both said too much to each other recently and the fight just now was the straw that broke the camel's back.

"Bella, do you want to go to La Push with me tonight?" Jacob asked Bella. And when she looked up at him and managed a smile, shrugged a little and finally nodded, got up out of the chair, for a split second, everything Kylie just yelled at him in the hallway outside of Bella's bedroom came back to him.. If she were really as upset as she claimed, if she were really as depressed.. It'd take a lot more than him to make her leave the confines of her room. It normally did.

Why was she suddenly okay with going somewhere with him again?

Being a typical idiot, he shoved the thought out of his mind and sat down on the bed, waiting on Bella to change like she'd went into the bathroom that seperated her room from Kylie's room to do.

When she changed, they left for La Push in Bella's truck. And as they pulled away, Jacob looked up, saw Kylie standing in the window of her bedroom. He felt that feeling again, the feeling he'd gotten a few minutes before, like he was making the biggest mistake of his life.. But again, he ignored it. He had to be right.. Kylie was being selfish and bitchy lately.

What he didn't realize, of course, was that he'd been a shitty boyfriend lately.. He'd forgotten dates, he'd went a day or two without calling her once because they had a huge fight, he'd tell her he'd do things and then he'd not do them because he was trying to help his best friend Bella as much as he could with her current situation.. And he wouldn't realize that, of course, until it was too late. But isn't that the way it always goes?

To quote a song.. You don't know what you got til it's gone.

Make Up Your Mind

If we break up, we'll wind up losing both of our minds
So wake up, let's make up and do this for the last time

Make up your mind and I'll make up mine
Don't worry about me, I'll be fine
The last time you yelled at me, I swore that I heard you say
"I wish I hadn't met you at all, " I started thinking

Make Up Your Mind, Theory Of A DeadMan

Kylie

In her room, Kylie sat on the floor in front of her bedroom door, listening, hoping against all reasonable hope that Jacob would calm down, come back into her room and they'd make up. They always made up. This was just a stupid fight and yes, she could honestly say she'd over reacted just now.. But she was just getting so sick of it lately, being shoved out of the big picture just because her royal highness was having an apparent neurotic mental breakdown.

She looked at the cork board above her desk, she saw all the pictures of Jacob and her with their friends, she saw the dream catcher he'd given her. She stood and walked to the window just in time to watch Jacob leaving for La Push with Bella and without her. She wiped at her eyes for a few moments and then sighed quietly. It hurt like hell.

She'd known him her whole life, practically, there wasn't a memory she had that didn't have him in it somehow, he'd just always been around.. And naturally, friendship turned into a mutual crush.. They'd only just gotten past the awkwardness that came with admitting how you felt to your best friend when Bella moved back to Forks.. At first, things were good. Bella was dating the jerk known as Edward, Jacob seemed content with her. They were always together, she and Jacob were, and if you'd asked Kylie about this time last year, she'd never have thought that Jacob would do what he'd done, that he'd say the things he said to her tonight.

She'd honestly been living out her lifelong fairytale until Bella came to live with their father and turned it into a nightmare of sorts.

Her eyes filled with tears again and she shook her head, stepping away from the window, shutting the curtains. "Okay.. It's going to be okay, Kylie, unlike her, you don't thrive on pity and attention. You will be okay. It's just a breakup. Jacob.."

But even as she said the words, deep down, she knew she didn't actually believe them. Everything felt like a raw nerve right now. She was feeling the full brunt of the pain and the bitterness and the anger.

But with shaky hands, she started pulling all the pictures down off of the corkboard and throwing them into the trash. The next thing that went was the framed photo of her with Jacob at the fair in Port Angeles the year before.

The entire time she was doing this, she was sobbing practically. She felt drained when she finished, falling back across her bed, staring up at the ceiling. But she wanted all of this pain out tonight. She wasn't going to sit back and just let it build, let it consume her.

She wasn't that kind of girl, she never had been.

Grabbing the trash bin and a box of matches from the hallway table on her way out of the house, she walked around to the backyard and struck the match, dropping it into the trash bin. She stood there, watched it burning.

Her eyes caught on the old friendship bracelet and she sighed as she slipped it off her wrist and added it to the fire, wiping at her eyes as she did so. They'd had friendship bracelets since their two schools took a joint field trip to the Port Angeles Zoo in 4th grade and he'd gotten them for them.

This only made her sob harder.

How much more did she have to lose so her precious and supposedly perfect saintly bitch of an older sister have to take from her before she was 'herself' again?

"Not this time, Bella.. You've finally done it. You've completely broken our relationship as sisters. If you want Jake? Take him by all means.. But don't expect me to give two shits about you when you've totally fucked up your life and his.. Because I know just how you really are, Bella, and I know that's exactly what you're going to do." Kylie said as she cried and sat down on the swing nearby, bringing her knees up to her chin, wrapping her arms around them, just staring intently into the fire she started in the trash bin from her room.

The part that hurt her the worst was that even knowing he'd basically chosen Bella over her tonight, and she'd finally just gotten sick of the way she seemed to not exist to pretty much anyone when Bella was around or Bella wanted or needed something.. She couldn't just turn off the feelings she'd always had for Jacob and the way they'd sort of grown and changed. This was her first major relationship and now, apparently, it looked as if it would be her first major taste of heartbreak.

And it was killing her inside.

The sad part of it really was that nobody would probably ever notice, because being the good and loyal daughter and sister or friend she was, she'd never let anybody see just how much it really hurt. She didn't need and thrive off of attention like her older sister seemed to lately.

And she sighed as she finally managed to stop crying, took a few calming and deep breaths.. "You'll be okay, Kylie. You're always okay. And you've never really needed anyone. And apparently, contrary to what you thought before, you really are expendable to pretty much everyone that matters to you. Fuck them all.. Especially Jacob and Bella."

Even as she tried to reassure herself with the words, she felt like it was half hearted at best. This was her first major heartbreak and it was killing her.

But unlike her older sister, she was going to keep going, she'd just adjust, move on.

Because God knew Charlie had enough on his plate with Bella being the clingy and obsessive neurotic twit she was lately about her precious freak Edward.

And she loved her father. She wasn't going to make anything any harder than they had to be for him. Two teenage meltdowns at once might just blow the man's mind.

The fire was dying out so she got a hose and put it out, walked back onto the deck and was about to walk into the house when a wolf howling nearby caught her off guard and made her jump about a mile into the air nervously.

She looked to see if she might catch a glimpse of the howl but she saw nothing and went inside, making sure to shut and lock the door behind her.

In Love With A Girl

I'm in love with a girl who knows me better,
Fell for the women just when I met her,
Took my sweet time when I was bitter,
Someone understands,
And she knows how to treat a fella right,
Give me that feeling every night,
Wants to make love when I wanna fight,
Now someone understand me,

Gavin Degraw, In Love With A Girl

(Wolf)

Sam had just finished walking him through the basics of patrolling the forest when it happened. All of a sudden his body felt like it was on fire all over. From where they stood just over the La Push Forks Treaty line, his eyes darted around, there was this smell, it smelled exactly like vanilla cake frosting and it hung heavily in the night air. At first, he saw nothing.

"Focus." Sam warned the wolf, but it was to no avail.. The wolf's more primal and baser instincts were taking over now and his nose was demanding that he follow the scent trail.

"What the hell is happening to me, Uley?" the wolf thought as he glared at Sam, angry. He wasn't sure what was going on, if this was some sort of step in the process of becoming a shapeshifter or something, but he didn't like it, the way the wolf in him just sort of took the helm and totally left his human side out of things.

Whatever this smell was, it was enticing him, enchanting him to follow it, find it, see it..

Sam chuckled a little, the chuckles came out as a series of barks. He thought back to the newest member of the pack, "You're imprinting. We'll pick this up in a few minutes.. Just go already, damn it, follow your nose.. If you don't now, you won't ever focus on what I'm telling you about patrolling the woods and protecting our people."

"Didn't think I needed your permission." the wolf thought as it broke from the two other wolves present, took off after the scent.

He found himself just a few feet away, standing in the treeline that ran along the back of a house.. The house was white, it was a smaller 2 story with a hip high picket fence surrounding. The fence was a suggestion to him. The scent trail wasn't ended yet and the wolf was determined to follow it.

The door opening on the side of the white 2 story house posed a huge problem and the solution to that problem because almost as soon as he saw her, he knew.. She was the source of the scent trail he'd been smelling just now.

She was his and nobody else's.

His vision tunneled and images like those from a movie or something bombarded his stream of consciousness. He could see her, he could see them, he could see everything. He felt as if everything he'd been before just sort of fell to the ground after being torn and stripped away. He was bare bones and raw nerves. She held the knife that tore and stripped away the pieces of his former self. She held his heart in her hands, beating, only she alone had the power to cherish it or break it into a thousand pieces.

The wolf's human counterpart would die before admitting this because he was nothing if not the epitome of male dominance.

With his enhanced wolf vision, he could see the tears in her eyes.. He hung back behind the bushes, just out of sight and watched as the 5'2 absolute center of his universe lit something in a baby blue metal wire trash bin on fire and cried, no, she sobbed..

He recognized her, he'd seen her around the reservation quite a bit with another boy who Sam thought would eventually become a member of the pack, Jacob Black.

More recently though, he'd seen her hanging around the search party gathered in the woods to find her older sister.. He'd seen the pained look in her soft bluish green eyes when Jacob emerged, carrying her older sister in his arms. He'd seen the way she ran to him and hugged him, expressed her worry over her older sister and her worry over Jacob, who seemed to sort of just barely acknowledge Kylie's attention to him.

The kid seemed to be good at ignoring his actual girlfriend and chasing her big sister's ass.. And the human counterpart of the wolf currently imprinting on Kylie, the girl in question.. He'd been almost painfully aware of Kylie Swan for a month or better now.. And he'd seen the way Jacob treated her.. He'd seen the way Jacob sort of neglected her lately in favor of her sister.

The anger surprised him as it fought to the surface.. Had that little shit made her cry?

Sam's Alpha voice broke through his thoughts and he heard him saying "Okay.. Whoa.. Calm down. Let's not assume anything yet. For now, though, I believe it's best if you stay clear of Jacob Black.. And your imprint."

"The fuck? Who the hell do you think you are, Uley.. Look, I didn't sign up for this shit.. And you're not takin her from me. This is probably the only good thing about being a shifter, damn it. I get her. I just.. I need her.. Okay?"

"I know.. But I needed Emily and look what I did to Emily when things got a little too intense because I had no one to teach me how to properly control my anger.. You can see her now and then.. But you have to keep your distance as much as possible."

He heard Jared's thought, "Okay buddy, let's not fight.. We're a pack, remember? And we gotta learn this so we can show the others when they finally phase and join us." and it served to calm him just a little.

He stared intently at Kylie, Jacob's girlfriend and a long howl ripped from his throat and echoed into the night as he turned and ran away to join his pack, to finish learning what he was responsible for as a shapeshifter.

He'd see her around, he was almost ninety percent certain of it. She was after all, dating that little shit Jacob Black... It was a matter of right place, right time and using any opportunity he got to see her and get to know her to do those things. All he had to do was pick his moment and approach accordingly. The wolf was nothing if not confident and bold, unafraid of little things like messing up a first meeting.

"Until I figure out a way to get her to myself.. She won't cry with me. So help me, God, I'm gonna do whatever it takes to make her happy, to protect her and love her.."