Side Effects

Author's Note: This story will predominately be told from Raven's point of view. At least, that is my plan. If I find that I like it better a different way, I'll go with that. No matter what, thought, is this story will be centered on Raven. I'm not completely up to date with the fine details of the Teen Titans canon, so if I leave a minute detail out then forgive me (sarcasm). I am a BBRae fan, to the point where TTG was worth it only for the "Rocks and Water" episode, although I like the whole show anyways. This opening chapter will be largely other points of view, but that's to establish the narrative. Updates to this story will be sparse until the summer, when I will have nothing else to do.

Chapter 1

Coincidences. I'm not a big fan of them; no detectives are, really. The word literally means that we shouldn't be fool. "Coincide" is pronounced differently that "COINCIDEnce" and there is a difference between them. To make something "coincide" means you force them to happen together; in essence, that means chance had nothing to do with it. "COINCIDEnce" is pronounce differently and it means a chance meeting, but it shouldn't. I've always preached that we should pronounce it just like we are adding "nce" to the end of "coincide," but that's just something I got from batman. And the rest of the Titans are sick of hearing it.

That being said, the day started the normal way: with nothing normal happening. That's just life with the Titans. Today, the difference was that it was more peaceful and quiet. At breakfast everything started like it usually did. None of the louder Titans were awake enough to cause commotion, and the only person awake and alert was (per usual) Raven. Even she seemed more tired or weighed down than usual, and I took a small mental note of that. Hey, can't hurt to keep a watchful eye over your half-demon friends.

After breakfast, when things usually became loud or interesting, today things seemed relaxed. No loud shenanigans, and I went to work on paperwork. Cyborg went to do something in the garage, and the others just dispersed. Ever since we defeated the Brain's masterplan, we haven't had much to do. A majority of the criminals we deal with were cryogenically preserved after that final battle, leaving us with little to do over the last two months. I've bided my time pitching in with detective work for Jump City PD, and I know Cyborg has taken the time to work on a number of projects.

It wasn't until late afternoon until Cyborg came to visit me. It was well after lunch, which had been an independent "fix your own stuff whenever" affair, to share what were concerns.

He knocked on my door, and entered when I bade him in. He seemed less worried and just put-off or curious to me, so I didn't figure he had anything major to ask.

"Hey, Rob, you seen BB?"

I didn't even need to look up from my papers. Cyborg and Beast Boy hadn't done much lately, so I figured he was just looking to hang out with Beast Boy.

"Nope. If you're looking, just check his comm's location."

"Yea, I figured you'd say that. What about Raven? Seen her?"

Well, that question at least made me look up from my work.

"No, per usual. Any particular reason?"

I could tell something was up. Asking about the whereabouts of those two is always suspicious, especially since they're prone to destroying each other. Well, not recently anyways.

"NOOO. Of course not. It's just that whenever two people who like each other disappear mysteriously for the afternoon, I typically raise an eyebrow…" Cyborg said sarcastically.

"You've noticed that too, huh?"

"Uh, how could I not? I mean, BB is BB, and he's never really done a good job at hiding anything…but what's surprised me is Raven recently. Don't get me wrong, I've called this for years, but it feels weird to watch it come together. I feel creepy almost."

"What about Raven have you noticed?" I asked rather calmly.

"Oh, sure, Mr. Serious here with the questions. Drop the act and just GOSSIP for a moment, won't ya?"

I gave him an apologetic shrug. I do occasionally take things to far, but someone has to keep this place grounded.

"But anyways, BB hasn't changed, but Raven has. After the whole 'Brain' thing, she was just more…relaxed. It's what she hasn't done that stands out."

"Such as?"

"Not throwing BB out the window for one! Did you see BB intentionally make her tea only to try to flirt with her yesterday! He did everything he could think of to make Raven awkward, and she didn't even bat an eye!"

"What all did he do, exactly?"

"Well, he…uh…made her tea…and called her 'mamma' and…well, that's about it."

I gave Cyborg a blank stare.

"Well, I have noticed that she's been more tolerant of Beast Boy lately, but she's also been more expressive in general. Did you notice that?"

He gave me a defeated look, complete with slouched shoulders.

"No…"

I looked back down at my papers.

"Well, thanks for sharing your concerns, but I'm not entirely sure that I share them…"

Cyborg walked out, and I worked till late that night. I had just gotten back from grabbing a slice of cold pizza when I got an incoming call from the Justice League's HQ.

"Computer: Answer call on private line, my office."

The computer beeped in reply, and the conference call soon came up. The voice control was one of the many things Cyborg had been working on, and so far it had worked the best.

On the conference call in front of me, there was Martin Manhunter and Batman on the screen. The JL hadn't been entirely pleased with how we handled the Brain's plot (mainly that they weren't included) but over time they began to appreciate our successes for what they were: successes. There was only one thing that they were still sore over, though.

"Robin, we've monitored a significant power shift to your area tonight. Do you have anything to declare?" Batman asked stoically.

"Declare? What, am I immigrating or something?...No, first I've heard of it. What type of power shift?"

"Zatanna isn't sure of specifics yet" was the Manhunter's reply.

"Zatanna? A magical power surge? That's different than just a power surge, guys. By a lot. What's going on?"

Batman and J'onn shared a look before replying.

"We're not sure. There is a massive shift in power that's been detected, and we're getting Dr. Fate to follow up on Zatanna's original readings." Batman replied.

"Well, if you're calling me, it's not to find out information. It's to see if I knew anything about it; they only way I would know is if it was from my team. Which leads me to think you suspect Raven is the cause, seeing as she's magically inclined. If this were a heads up or a courtesy call, Batman would have made it alone…so why don't you guys tell me the angle here?"

For a second, as Batman and J'onn shared a second glance, Batman almost looked smug. Almost.

"There is no angle, but we're still largely in the dark as to how Raven's powers work or her relationship to her father." J'onn stated.

"And I've given you a copy of my extensive files, as well as updates whenever I make them. You have everything I have."

"Robin, the problem isn't on paper. The League doesn't like having a potentially unchecked demon suddenly gain massive power about an hour ago." Batman's tone implied that while the situation wasn't likely to escalate far, the League was serious.

"So, you think Raven has succumbed to the father who no longer exists an hour ago and things have been so quiet that I haven't noticed anything? If that even did happen, we would know within seconds from the proximity damage alone…"

Batman seemed to like that answer (former student showing up the League, and all) and J'onn didn't seem to be able to state anything against that. At least for the time being.

"You take care not to let anything blow up. We're not turning a blind eye this time…" J'onn's words rang almost like a threat as the screen went dark.

So that's where I find myself now. Running through possible scenarios that would cause Raven's power's to flux without creating any chaos or commotion whatsoever. And I just keep coming back to what Cyborg was getting at. It all seems so coincidental.

And I don't like those.

POV BREAK (Raven's POV) ONE DAY BEFORE

IF I am being brutally honest, then yes, deep down I enjoy time spent with Beast Boy. I don't know why, I know not how, and it took forever for myself to accept it (and persuasions from my other selves), but I do like Beast Boy. Plain and simple, right?

No; now the half-demon part comes into play. I've always had to suppress what I feel and what I express because harnessing emotions is dangerous. That's the way it's always been because that's how my father made it. It basically was a curse that accompanied my powers: as long as I rejected my father, my emotions and powers wouldn't mix. When I defeated him, that faded, but didn't go away. I had more emotional flexibility than ever before, and I didn't know what to do with it. I had the ability to feel more than I thought I could, at least up until recently when I finally reached my max.

And that was brought on by Beast Boy. The tea he made me this morning tasted all the sweeter because of his involvement, which horrified part of me and excited the other. I've been trying to just go along with my feelings without stopping to question too much, else I'm afraid of reverting back to just denying everything.

At lunch, after a morning spent reading in solitude, I was accompanied by none other than Beast Boy. I don't know why, but today he just seemed better than usual. His jokes were, on occasion, funny, and we both ended up just spending time together talking. Like it was nothing. Like we were friends. Like we were more than friends.

And then I had to go and ruin the ride. We were having such a good time that we had moved into my room. Not for anything other than Beast Boy's insistence on seeing if he could transform into the four-eyed raven's that decorated my room (and also my mindscape). From there, things became complicated as I completely killed the light conversation.

"This has all been…nice, actually."

"Well, thanks, I guess. Were you expecting me to suck?"

"No, but you better not expect that from me." I don't exactly know why I said it. Alluding to the fact that I won't be sucking anything didn't help our conversation. He just stared at me dumbfounded, and I felt a sheepish desire to pull my hood as far over my face as possible.

"Did…did you just…?"

I gave a small nod, and Beast Boy just lost it. He was quite literally rolling on the floor while laughing, and I felt as if a weight was taken off my shoulders.

As he simmered down, things finally went back to normal.

"Hehe, sorry. I just never pictured you saying…something like that."

"Why not? 'Cause I'm the cold, emotionless one?"

"No, 'cuz you're the one who's no fun! Wait, what do you mean?"

Crap. And I just got the conversation back to normal.

"You know, the one who can't feel anything. At least, that's what everything thinks."

"…because you told them that…"

Touché.

"Never mind that."

He didn't even seem fazed by my sudden dark statements.

"Well, uh, can I ask a question?"

I arched an eyebrow at him.

"Well, uh, so I know that you can't feel as much because of your powers, but why does that matter if Trigon's gone?"

That was…actually a good question.

"Well, because he's not completely gone. His power is still there, not being used. The problem with being so powerful is that if he power sits there long enough, he will find a way to regain it, even from beyond the grave…"

"Well, that sucks. Can't we like…beat him to it?"

"And do what? Take the power for ourselves?"

"Yea. So he can't get it. Can you do that?"

I sat there almost dumbfounded. Every part of my wanted to say 'no, idiot, that's the whole thing we are trying to avoid.' Yet, part of me wanted to know the answers to his question. Why can't I control his power if he's gone? He can't influence me, can he?

We eventually changed the subject, but what he had said stayed on the back of my mind the rest of the day.

The next morning, he again brought me tea and antagonized me by calling me 'mamma,' but it didn't actually bother me. I had gone to bed after having done so much work researching what he had mentioned that I was just stuck in "open-minded mode" so that I seemed to consider everything, such as the possibility that I could be with him. If that happened, he was going to have to find a new nickname, however.

Later that afternoon, I had convinced myself that it was possible. I decided to set everything up, but still couldn't shake the feeling that something could go wrong. I looked through my books for a possible failsafe for what I was to try, but it wasn't until my thoughts strayed to Beast Boy that I figured out what I was going to do. I sent him a message telling him to come to my room, and then got to work on the preparations.

There was a knock on the door, followed by his voice.

"Uh, Raven?"

I used my powers to open the door.

"In here. Come in."

I had the curtains closed and the room was illuminated by the ring of candles around where I stood. Everything had been set up just right.

Beast Boy walked slowly, as if the setting creeped him out. I wouldn't exactly blame him, if I walked into a demon trap and didn't know it.

"So, uh, what's with the candles?"

"It's a demon trap that I added a few extra rules to. I can't leave it, unless you (and only you) were to blow out one of the candles."

"O…kay. So did you trap yourself and need help getting out?"

"No. I've been thinking about what you said…"

"Aww, man, I should have been listening…"

"About taking Trigon's power before he does. I can take his power, and it should free me to feel emotions without anything bad happening."

He seemed to think about that for a brief second.

"Oh. That's good. How'd you do it?"

I paused for a second, knowing this wouldn't be easy to explain. Or at least not easy to get him to agree with it.

"I haven't done it yet. If I…assume his position…then I will be granted all of his power. I just have to take control of everything that I've ran from…"

"Well…that's certainly one option…"

"And I know it sounds insane, but I have every reason to believe that I will gain his power but still be in full control. My father was evil because that's who he was, not because his powers made him. It shouldn't be any different for me…"

"You mean you're evil!? Worst kept secret ever!"

"No, I'll still be me…what the heck does that mean anyways!?"

He just gave me his trademarked grin.

"So, if it won't be bad, then why am I here?"

"Well…two reasons. One, in case this does somehow go awry, I've set this trap to contain myself. Only you can let me out of this, so I won't be released until we know I'm safe."

"And two?"

"I-I wanted you here because…"

"HELLO? Earth to Raven! Because?"

"…when I do this, I may need something or someone to remind me what I care about."

Beast Boy seemed taken aback by this.

"Oh…WAIT A MINUTE!"

I cringed, both mentally and physically as a realized what I just said. Apparently, he must have caught on too.

"Did you just say that you care about me?!"

"…Maybe…"

"HA!"

"'HA!' what?"

"…I don't know. I've never really expected to get this far…"

"Really?"

"Well, yea, this all seemed like a far-fetched dream until fifteen seconds ago…"

"Fair enough. Can I worry about the whole demon-trap/accepting father's power first though?"

He shrugged his shoulders, and let me go right ahead. I went to start, but he distracted me by going 'OOH!' and running towards one of my shelves. He picked up a small object and ran it over to me, forcing it into my hand.

"For good luck" he said while trying to contain the biggest grin, and I was left looking into my palm where he left a penny. THE penny. The one he gave to me before I destroyed the world, which I somehow associate with positive feelings from that day.

The irony of the situation was not lost on either of us. We made eye contact for a brief moment before I gave him a small smile. He beamed as if he had won the lottery at that, and I went back to the task at hand.

I began to chant my mantra, while slowly weaving in other words. Some pertaining to Trigon, some to the magic, and some used to help me control the process. As the mantra started to pick up pace, I could feel the energy building. I was able to locate the inter-realital void where Trigon's power was idling laying, and began to tap into it. Although my eyes were closed, I could feel the red symbols on my body light up.

Soon, I weaved part of "The Gem" mantra into my growing mantra, and this activated the last start-up step: the rings of runes that floated around me when I become the portal reappeared. Now I was ready and everything was primed, just waiting for the last three words. I opened my eyes to see Beast Boy watching nervously with extremely wide eyes. I gave him an uncharacteristic wink, why I don't know, and then finished the spell.

"Azarath Metrion ZINTHOS!"

Instantly, the portal-runes shifted into a ball of light that encompassed me. I could feel the Trigon's immense power suddenly pouring into me, and I didn't feel any different other than that. It would have been easy to miss any changes in the midst of having power literally poured down upon you.

After a minute, the process had completed and I dropped onto my knees. I wasn't able to fall to any one side because the trap prohibited me, which reminded me that Beast Boy was still there. I stood up, only to see Beast Boy's expression slowly become filled with horror.

"What? What's wrong?! What happened Beast Boy?"

"…how am I supposed to know if you're the real Raven. I mean, you don't look like her anymore."

He nodded towards my body, as if to make his point. I looked much the same except for my skin, which had turned red, and my eyes, which had shifted into Trigon's four red eyes. I could always tell when they shifted because it came with a great increase in vision, especially in the dark.

I quickly focused on finding a spell that returned me to my normal appearance. I had had this happen once before, and ever since had memorized something that would revert me back to how I preferred to look. With that done, Beast Boy relaxed but didn't immediately free me.

"So how am I supposed to know if you are the real Raven?"

His insistence annoyed me a little, but only because I know that I am me. He can't, so I should be glad he has the good sense to make sure.

"Well, you'd have to ask me something only the real Raven would know." I lied. If someone took over my body, then they would have access to my memories in a full takeover. However, right now I just wanted out of this trap. I didn't know if what I did made me full demon or not, but I still didn't like being trapped here.

"Well…the real Raven basically said she like me, so…"

I already don't like where this is going…

"…tell me why Raven likes me."

Of course, the one question I can't answer. I stared at the ground, trying to think of what to tell him. I mean, it's not for his jokes alone, or his looks alone, or his personality alone. I seem to be using 'alone' a lot, which means I like some of those things, but they aren't why I like him.

"I…I don't know. I suppose it's because he makes me feel wanted and loved, and I can feel his warmth whenever I'm around him. He makes me feel, and that's something I'm not used to…"

Beast Boy seemed taken back, before slowly walking up and blowing out the candles.

"Well, I guess that works."

Before he even knew it, I had him in a hug. Heck, I had him in a hug before I even knew it.

"Thank you." I told him, and unlike the last two times we had hugged, the other person hugged back before it was over.

"You know, if you really want to thank me, we could go to dinner…"

I broke the hug and gave him a blank look.

"Way to go, you killed it."

"Aww, so no dinner?"

I walked past him, then looked back and gave him a small smirk.

"Well, I didn't say that…"

POV BREAK (Beast Boy's POV)

Things were getting really weird now. And that's not even counting the date I had with Raven. We went to dinner for seafood, where she had calamari and I don't even remember looking at what I ordered. On our flight back, she got urgent message from Robin that said she needed to speak to him, and that Robin said to keep it secret. She decided that if 'we' would work, then we would both need to be honest with each other and sneaky around everyone else, which is why I knew this much.

The rest I found out because I was in the air vents watching the meeting.

Raven walked into Robin's office, and Robin seemed slightly flustered.

"What's got you riled up, Robin?"

"We need to talk, and I need you to be…honest…with me, Raven. Earlier, some large power fluctuations were picked up coming from the tower; they were magical in nature. Was that you?"

Raven, who had sat down at the end of the long table on the opposite end of Robin, instantly locked up. She still had her hood on, and it was difficult to tell, but she definitely became more closely guarded.

"…yes. Why?"

"I…need to know what happened, Raven…"

"And why should I tell you? What business of it is yours?"

"Come on, Raven, if something happened then it's my business to know about it. You should know that."

Usually, that would be the last thing that would work. That should have even enraged Raven a little bit. Robin actually flinched before Raven reacted as if he expected as much.

We were both surprised when Raven answered calmly.

"Fine. You should know…"

That answer definitely surprised us both.

"…I found a way to accept Trigon's power."

Robin's went wide, and he immediately began to rub his face as if something had went horribly wrong. Raven began to talk faster as if she knew that he was already judging her without hearing her full story.

"But it doesn't have any side effects. It actually helps me control my emotions; I shouldn't ever have any more problems with them!"

"No no no, Raven! You got it all wrong! You were supposed to lock up and walk out as if I had offended you! The Justice League is listening in on this Raven! Now there's no way they will leave you alone!"

Raven's eyes went wide, and she began to get more than defensive. She got angry.

"The Justice League? They already don't trust me! What do you think they'll do if they hear about this?! They'll hunt me down like a criminal, Robin!"

Robin pinched the bridge of his nose as he thought of what to do. He reached out onto his communicator and typed a message in, then sent it to Raven. I could only see what it said on her screen.

"JL has ears here only. They can't see us."

Raven read the text, then looked back up to Robin with an idea already forming.

"I won't be arrested and processed without doing anything wrong! If you can't help me…I'll just leave."

Raven said it, with the slightest hint of a question in her voice, as if waiting for a confirmation.

"And what? Make yourself a fugitive in order to show your innocence?" Robin questioned, while giving her a large nod that told her that she should leave while she could.

"Better than staying with backstabbing friends…"

Robin flinched a little, and mouthed a 'sorry' while Raven gave a small, knowing nod back expressing to him that she was just putting on a show. I sat here amazed since I still can't even figure out which way to plug in a USB while they have their own little language here.

"No, I take that back… my friends have been amazing. It's our treacherous leader that's the problem…"

With that, Raven vanished into the floor, and Robin immediately turned to the blank TV screen. I took the chance to send Raven a text to let her know I saw it all and she shouldn't bother saying goodbye, as long as we meet up eventually. All she had time to reply was "Thank you. Will do."

Robin's screen turned on to a conference call of the Justice League's entire leadership, many of which did not seem happy. At first, I felt like watching Robin tear into them (he was not happy to have forced Raven on the run) but instead I felt like trying to catch Raven on her way out. She didn't have to stop for me to wave goodbye, or something.

I made it to her room, only to hear her frantically pacing and packing. I knocked on the door and quietly called her name, and all of a sudden I dropped through the floor and re-appeared on the other side. I didn't even have time to let my stomach get queasy from the teleportation before I had to dodge some flying article or other. Within a minute, Raven had magically assorted all of her belongings until the room was empty. Her stuff had disappeared, and I guessed she sent it to the dimension that she always threatened to send me.

"So, uh, this is goodbye?" I asked.

Raven turned around and gave me yet another hug, only this time more desperate and tighter.

"Far from it. This is the beginning…"

"Okay. That works too, I guess."

"I'll be in touch, Beast Boy. In the meantime, don't tell anyone about us. Robin or I will figure a way out of this."

We broke apart, and she began to open a portal to her side.

Before she got in, she walked back up to me, whispered in my ear, and handed me something. She jumped into her portal, and that was the last I saw of Raven for a while.

It took me a few moments to process what she said: "You know what this is for."

I looked down to find a penny in my hand…