title: for now we'll only wave

summary: she leaves on a saturday morning— Director/Tex(Allison)

notes: red vs blue still makes me cry the second time around but what else is new, really.

She leaves on a quiet Saturday morning.

"Oh— come on, put that thing down," she says, she raises her hand to hide her face from the camera but he's persistent in recording it all.

"One smile, Allison," he bargains in that charming southern drawl of his, "Give me something to remember you by." He winks at her, grinning.

She rolls her eyes but she smiles anyway, a small one that curves up more to the right and he takes it all in; the clear, periwinkle blue of the sky, the way the sun shines down on her golden hair, the light reflected in her eyes, her smile. He wants to remember every minute of this moment.

"Leonard," she says more seriously, almost pouting, "You're going to make me late."

"I know— I'm just— " He takes her hand in his, holds it for a while.

"You'll see me again. I won't be gone forever," she says pulls her hand away to grab her bag.

You don't know that, he thinks but doesn't say, this is war and anything could happen and I don't want it to happen to you.

Instead he closes the space between them, presses his lips to her cheek. "I love you," he tells her. I love you so much. She blinks a few times, breathes in.

Her eyes flicker from their house to him. For a moment she thinks about the things she's leaving behind. The things she always leaves behind.

"Take care of our girl," she says, looking up at him through her lashes and he nods once, "I have to go now." She moves to leave but he grabs her arm quickly, latches onto her wrist tightly. She glances down at his hand.

"Allison— " You don't really have to go, just stay here with me, with our daughter— fuck the military and fuck this war just stay, he wants to say but he doesn't because this is Allison and there's no talking her out of anything once she's determined he's learned.

"Don't make me hurt you Leonard," she warns but there's no real malice behind her words and everything feels different. For some reason, it's harder this time around, leaving that is. Allison is always leaving because of the military but this time… this time it almost feels permanent. Scary.

"I just wanted to say— "

"Don't," she cuts him off and she hadn't realized she'd been holding her breath. Her chest feels tight. She swallows. "Do me a favor and don't say goodbye. I hate goodbyes."

She doesn't look at him, afraid of the wetness in his eyes and hides her own under the low brim of her hat.

"Stay safe," he supplies instead, "I'll see you soon." It's more a hope than an actual statement. It feels like a lie.

"I'll see you soon," she repeats back and then she's walking away and he's watching her go and there's a finality to it all that scares him.

"Allison!" he calls out partly terrified and she only looks back once. He raises his hand slowly to wave at her and the tension squeezing around his heart is only slightly relieved when she waves back.

He tells himself that this isn't goodbye, that she isn't really gone, she just isn't here right now is all.

(maybe soon he'll actually believe that)