"Well, you guys seem to be feeling better." Was what Rhodey said as he surveyed the room full of –not sick- Avengers. Tony, of course, was not present, most likely still hiding in the closet. The colonel wouldn't put it past the man to have spent the night there. "Tony said you were sick."

"We were," Barton barely looked up from his spot on the back of the couch (why? There were plenty of seats) "Yesterday. 'The Flu from Hell' only lasts twenty-four hours."

'Of course it does,' "Where's Tony?" Rhodey asks, because either Tony doesn't know and is still in hiding, or he does, and failed to call off the 'rescue' from Rhodey. If it was the latter then they would have words, because despite what Tony likes to think, Rhodey was not at his beck and call and couldn't just drop everything and come running every time the billionaire whistles.

If it was the former, and Tony was still in a closet, he would never live it down.

"Last I saw him," Romanov started, drawing Rhodey out of his head, "he was running away from a sneezing Thor. I think he locked himself in the hall closet."

Rhodey nodded, "Right. Thanks." Ignoring the fact that he was now being ignored by a room full of superheroes, Rhodey started down the hall.

-Line-

After the third wrong closet (why does Tony have so many closets?) Rhodey finally broke down and asked Jarvis where Tony was.

"Two doors down, on the left, colonel."

"Thanks, J."

When he got there Rhodey attempted to open the door, only to find it locked. Finding it a little funny that Tony actually locked himself in a closet to get away from his sick teammates, Rhodey found it hard to be too annoyed at the man-child that is his best friend.

Instead, he knocked, "Tony," he heard a groan from inside, followed by a curse and a muffled thud. Rhodey smirked "Open up, man." There was some shuffling, a few more bangs, and a cut off whine from the man inside, before the door was finally opened.

Rhodey had been expecting to get a tackle hug, maybe even to be used as a human shield until Tony was sure it was safe to exit. What he hadn't expected was for Tony to practically collapse against him, rubbing his stubbly face into the colonels chest, mumbling something about dying.

Rhodey sighed, "You are not dying," Tony whined pathetically, "Though I'm going to go out on a limb and say that you are sick."

"Sick?" Tony looked up at him with bloodshot eyes, "No. Not sick; dying. Dying, Rhodey. I'm dead, and this is hell, only you're here, which doesn't make sense, because you put up with me. You're practically a saint, why would you be in hell-" Tony cut himself off with a painful sounding coughing fit, doubling over with the force of each hack, before leaning heavily against Rhodey.

Rhodey winched sympathetically, "C'mon, you need to get to bed." He tried to back away but Tony clung like a leach, refusing to let go. "Nooooo," he whined, voice muffled from where his face was buried in Rhodey's shirt "I dun wanna move."

"Tony," Rhodey tried to move again, voice showing is exasperation. Tony peeked up at him again, "Carry me?" He asked childishly, giving his best puppy dog eyes.

"You really are sick if you think I'm gonna carry your ass to bed. You're a grown man."

Tony sighed, rubbing his face against Rhodey one last time before stepping back, swaying a little as he did so. Rhodey grabbed his arm before he could fall, helping Tony lean against him.

Tony complained as they walked toward the elevator, "You use to carry me when I was sick," he mumbled grumpily, "or hurt, for that matter. What happened to our love, Honey Bear?" He asked, only half joking.

Rhodey sighed again –he did that a lot when Tony was involved- "Yeah, I used to carry you. When you were a fourteen year old string bean that weighed less than a puppy, and could barely keep himself from tripping on a good day."

"So, what you're saying is, I got fat."

"Yep."

"Asshole," Tony sniffed and tried to bury his head in Rhodey's shoulder when they got in the elevator (the Avengers in the common room not sparing them a glance as they walked by) and growling miserably when he failed, causing Rhodey to chuckle.

When they reached Tony's floor Rhodey all but dragged the other man to bed, tossing him unceremoniously to the mattress. Tony groaned, burying his face into the pillow and trying to curl up into a ball of misery.

Rhodey was able to wrestle the blankets from under the now dead to the world man, covering him up before leaving the room to call Pepper and explain why Tony won't be taking any calls that day.

Then the lights started blinking and the world was shaking and alarms were blaring and Rhodey had to get to Tony.

It was over just as fast as it had started.

But that didn't even register to Rhodey, because when he opened the bedroom door, Tony was gone.

Sequel requested by a guest and MarvelLuver, the premise was also given by MarvelLuver.

I have plans. Big, big plans... *ominous laughter*