She woke to a knock at the door. It took her a few moments to remember where she was and why. She let her head fall back onto the pillow when memories from the night before came flooding back. She wasn't ready to face the world yet.

"Carter, please open the door." It was Jack. She closed her eyes tightly. God when had she started calling him Jack? It might only be in her head – but that didn't make it any less concerning.

"It's unlocked." She called back, still unwilling to move. She heard the door open and close and his footsteps as they approached the bed. She expected him to take the chair beside her bed as Daniel had the night before and jumped in surprise when the mattress dipped and she felt his hand briefly touch her shoulder. She still had to find the courage to turn and look at him.

"Sam… I'm sorry." She hated the pity in his voice. She wanted to hit him. She wanted to tear him apart and everything in this room and herself while she was at it. How could life be so cruel? Now not only did they both know they had feelings for each other but they had a taste of what could be. But there was no way they could have what they both desired. Not now anyway… not unless word got back to the SGC and they were re-assigned for last nights... mishap. She felt a twinge in her heart at this. SG-1 be torn apart? That would be equally as awful.

"It's not your fault." She whispered. She rolled over to face him and felt her body slip and her hip bump into his. She made to move but before she could, his hand was on her face and his calloused thumb rubbing across her cheek.

"One day Carter, when we have saved the world…" He sighed, seeming to change his mind. "I could retire." Clearly he was tired of waiting too. She would never let him retire now though, it was not time yet.

"No." She shook her head and his hand slipped from her face. She finally looked him in the eyes and suddenly felt more herself. Those familiar brown eyes that spoke to her on a regular basis. One look was all she needed to see right into his soul. He was willing to do it, she knew he was. He would drop everything for her, just as she would for him. "No." She repeated, this time more emphatically. "SG-1 needs you. I won't allow it." She struggled into a sitting position and swung her legs over the side of the bed so she was sitting next to him. She twisted her body so she could still look him in the eyes and took his hand in hers entwining their fingers. "I'll wait."

"But how long?" He raised an eyebrow. "How long will we have to wait?"

"I don't know." She gave his hand a gentle squeeze. "I enjoy working with you Sir and I want to continue to do so for as long as possible. I know it's arrogant of me to think this…" She sucked in her bottom lip nervously. "…but SG-1 is the best there is. We are needed right now."

"Okay," he answered his eyes searching hers as if ensuring she was being honest. "If you want to wait, I'll wait." He leant forward and pressed his lips to her forehead quickly before untangling his fingers from hers and standing. "We are leaving in ten minutes, get your gear sorted Carter." He smirked and at first she thought he was somehow making fun of her but when she looked up into his eyes she realized he was telling her something. Time to go back to Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter, but I will always care for you.

"Yes Sir," she sat up straighter and pushed all her feelings into a little box in the back of her mind. She would have to sort through them later… much later. She knew he had to do the same thing, fight the same internal battles she did. She just hoped they were strong enough, that their little boxes would remain intact until their 'one day' arrived.

The End.