Day 174 - 22/10/1998 - Horcrux

Severus : 20 Lucius : 23 Tom : 37

The sensation of a poke in his mind is what made Tom look up from his reading. He was studying the latest news in the Quibbler, which took a great effort for him as his mind was naturally immune to the deciphering charms. The pink glasses provided with the magazine only helped relax his mind so much.

Quickly, he searched the room for the source of his strange sensations but found nothing that could explain them. Alarmed, he built up his mental defences and went investigating this oddity in his mind. He located the source in the region of his Horcruxes. The mind link that permitted him to feel his soul at all times and the familiar bond with Nagini pulsed with life, showing their healthy states. Tom very rarely delved into this corner of his mind, as it was distracting having so many links open to the world. Since rediscovering his familiar bond with Nagini, he had reached out to her, and had received only a feeble answer, barely there and certainly not fully conscious. The state of the bond made it obvious that Nagini was well, so Tom was convinced that Nagini was in a magically induced coma. He had sent reassurance through the bond and then closed it. It could be used against him by whoever had incapacitated Nagini.

The new disturbance was coming from the Horcrux region, one of them was trying to reach him. Tom relaxed a fraction, there was no intruder in his mind. As all his Horcruxes were safe in the very room Tom was standing in, the source of the poke had to be Harry. Now curious instead of concerned, Tom tried to answer to the message by sending a wave of his emotions at the link. A surprised echo is what responded. Then after a second, another prod arrived, tinged with excitement. They could apparently communicate with their feelings. Tom went searching for Harry, so that they could talk about this discovery. He found him in the bedroom, playing with a sleeping Severus' hair. Severus had to take naps these days as he was working on a potion that required night time brewing. Lucius was in an armchair, reading a treaty about spell casting in Russian.

Tom went to sit near Harry and softly kissed him, his hands caressing the side of his face. With the mind link opened between them, it was like Tom could feel Harry melting with his touch.

"You will never cease to surprise me, will you ?" Tom asked him.

A smirk and a mental shove was his answer, catching him off guard. Tom physically recoiled, his surprise sending him tumbling on the floor while Harry was trying to muffle his laughter, for fear of waking Severus. Tom glared, stood and dusted his clothes. If Harry wanted to play like that... He sent a playful mental pinch, that had Harry gasp and erupt in goosebumps. Harry glared and disentangled himself from Severus.

Tom had taken the second armchair in the room. Harry went to join him, straddling his thighs, and curling his arms around Tom's neck.

"If you're going to make out, I want in." Lucius interrupted their glaring contest.

"We're going to meditate actually." Harry corrected. "If you're good we'll make out later."

Lucius shivered and licked his lips. Harry was getting to know all of their weaknesses, knew how to use them to control the situation. So yes, Lucius might have a bit of a praise kink, and Severus melted with neck kisses and hair pulling and Tom liked to be denied and have to work for his pleasure. Harry knew all that and used it mercilessly out of the bedroom. His own love for feather-light touches and hand holding was wholly unused as manipulation, the men finding it too cruel to trivialize their tender affection on petty schemes.

Lucius let them to their mind melding and concentrated on his treaty. Harry had given it to him this morning, half as a gift as it was the Room of Requirement's day off -it wouldn't get them anything once in a while for some reason- and half as a work assignment that would promise a handsome gift if he managed to read it completely in the day. As Lucius was not as fluent in Russian as he was in Arabic and Latin, it was quite slow going but he was confident he could finish it before midnight.

Harry turned back to Tom and let his forehead rest against his. They both closed their eyes and basked into their shared feeling of contentment. Tom felt that he could stay like this forever but he had tons of questions on his mind that demanded attention. He opened his eyes.

"How did you discover you could communicate through the link, Harry?"

"Because you did it to me before."

Harry's tone was dry and his contentment had soured. As Tom had considered him an enemy before the time reversing spell, he was sure that the communication that had happened before had had to be less than pleasant.

"What exactly did I do ?" He needed to know how much he had hurt Harry so that he could take responsibility for his past actions.

"The empathy was way less enjoyable for one. I could only feel your strongest emotions and they translated to acute pain in my scar." Harry's hands had fallen from Tom's neck and he was now playing with edge of his shirt, as a way to keep his eyes down. "At first the transfer was only accidental, but you soon discovered that you could send me visions. I helped save a man from Nagini. And you manipulated me into thinking that my godfather was in danger, to lure me into a trap."

Tom sensed that there was more to it but he didn't want to press Harry into revealing more than he was comfortable with. He stroked Harry's sides gently and Harry lifted his eyes back up to his.

"That's not all. You routinely gave me nightmares and forced me to watch you torturing people." Harry took a deep breath. "I was thinking about the link now that you don't want me tortured any more and I found the region of my mind where it was anchored. I didn't know we could communicate like that."

"I'm sorry Harry."

"We can't change the past. But I'm glad it doesn't hurt any more."

"We can avoid using it if you're not comfortable."

Harry kissed him softly and cupped his cheeks.

"I don't think visions would agree with me very well but I like the empathy. Feeling you in my mind is very comforting." Harry also liked his privacy, but as Tom was the most private person he knew of, he didn't think there would be any problems on that front.

Tom was focusing, trying to send Harry pleasure. He pushed into the link, sending him impressions of how he had felt the last time Harry and him were in bed together. He was rewarded when he heard Harry gasp. Opening his eyes, Tom had the wonderful view of Harry's half-lidded eyes and flushed cheeks, biting his lip.

He would focus on sending Harry only the best of his emotions. The man had lived through so much pain, he needed to feel safe and loved.

They exchanged a kiss, the pleasurable feedback in loop between them. That would prove to be fun. But for now they had a Severus to wake and a Lucius to tease. The fun would come later.

Day 177 - 25/10/1998 - Defenses

Severus : 20 Lucius : 23 Tom : 37

Neville Longbottom was once again sneaking around in the darkened corridors of Hogwarts, sheltered from view by Harry's invisibility cloak. He had heard that some Ministry officials had come to Hogwarts again this day. He managed to find their location with Draco's help. Draco was the one Harry had entrusted with his Marauder's Map. Luna had gotten the Resurrection Stone.

As the three Generals of the Shadow Side, they had met Harry before the Battle of Hogwarts and had discussed what were to happen should any of them die. They had not anticipated that one of them would be locked away for months and completely unreachable.

Life at Hogwarts these days was very surreal. Harry and the three Dark figureheads had disappeared for nearly six months now. The Ministry had declared them missing at first, and would declare them dead at the seventh month mark. Nobody wanted to think about Harry dying but the officials were hoping to get access to Severus Snape's Will after his death, as he had no known descendants. His possessions would be taken over by the Ministry, that would certainly prove useful in the tracking and conviction of the Death Eaters.

Hogwarts had been rebuilt and repaired during the summer and had reopened for the new school year. It was like time was at a standstill. They were expected to go to class and pretend everything was normal all the while being interrogated by Aurors. Trials were happening constantly, the Daily Prophet's headlines always some variation of the same theme. The students were back in a semblance of normalcy, a strange routine full of uncertainty and hope. Nobody dared celebrate the end of the war.

The faculty of Hogwarts had suffered some losses during the Battle and professors had to be replaced. There was no actual Headmaster though. Due to a loophole in Hogwarts traditions, the power of a Headmaster could not be stripped if there was no conviction or arrest. As no Auror had tried to arrest Severus Snape, instead trying to kill him, he was still officially Headmaster of Hogwarts.

The Headmaster office was locked. The castle was actively protecting the office and the Room of Requirement. Ministry officials had taken over the castle at first, trying to Bombarda their way into the Room, but nothing worked. They had stopped after a while, now trying to disintegrate the wards. They had closed off the seventh floor corridor on that side, which made surveillance difficult.

The Shadow Side was also trying to find a way in, or at least a way to communicate but were to this day unsuccessful.

Neville, Luna and Draco had all come back for their "Eighth Year". Draco had been under some heavy suspicion for a long while before Neville had pulled some strings in the Light Side and the old Pureblood Light families that would listen to a Longbottom. He got a short sentence to Azkaban, thankfully devoid of Dementors, over three months in the summer and had gotten out just in time for the first day of school.

During his imprisonment, Draco had a lot of time to think, and as the strategist of the Generals, he had come up with ways to keep the people calm, both inside the Shadow Side and in the whole country. He was conspiring with the werewolf, vampire and merpeople leaders in the Shadow Side, and the goblins. They stayed out of the war but were interested in keeping the country afloat. After all, a declining country was bad for business.

Luna had inherited the Quibbler and was continuing her father's work of educating the masses. She left the day to day managing to Andromeda Tonks and came back to Hogwarts to help find a way to contact Harry. So far, all of her attempts had failed, even dream projection and dark rituals.

Neville had had to take control of the Shadow Side, which he did very easily as he had the support of the two other Generals. He had had to organise rehousing and food campaigns, had visited members in Saint Mungo's in a disguise, went to every funeral and personally funded an orphanage.

He was now trying to find jobs for everyone who needed them. At least there was some progress. He had been overjoyed when the tutoring the Slytherin students gave in Potions had resulted in the werewolf population finally being able to brew Wolfsbane themselves.

He was exhausted, trying to manage thousands of people, some of which had very particular needs, and all of that in the utmost discretion. How they had managed to keep a low profile while everyone was panicking, he would never know.

Neville didn't know how Harry had the energy. He was definitely not made for politics. Once he found a way to contact Harry, he would happily step down and go back to his support role of growing medicinal plants and teaching himself Healing magic. His part in this had always been to provide connections with old Light families and be a figurehead and teacher. He had taught Herbology and general DADA to the Shadow Side recruits and had dabbled in Potions brewing. He liked his job. If the war ended one day, Neville would love to be a Herbology teacher at Hogwarts.

He found the Aurors very easily once he approached the sixth floor corridor. They were making a lot of noise, casting spells and exploding bits of the ceiling. They were using spells in a language Neville didn't know. They certainly seemed effective, stone dust permeating the air around them. The Aurors were just underneath the Room of Requirement. They were trying to break in and Neville had to find a way to stop them.

Before he could do anything, the ceiling trembled and a powerful shockwave knocked all the Aurors back. Some of them were out cold but most of them were still awake. After catching their breath they went back to attacking the Room from below. The stone chipped away, revealing a barrier of pure magic that seemed to be the edge of the Room of Requirement. As soon as it became visible, a second shockwave sent all the remaining Aurors backwards in a concussive force. The force went through Neville without hurting him, only eliciting a shiver, reflex of experiencing such power.

The castle had defended itself very violently and had left him completely untouched.

Neville cautiously approached the site of the barrier. Lifting his head, he saw the stone ceiling replacing itself, lifting bits and stone dust in mid-air before sticking it back where it belonged. Before the wound closed itself up completely, a trickle of magic slithered down to Neville and sunk into the skin of his outstretched hand. A house elf Neville had never seen before appeared with a pop. She was wearing the Hogwarts crest on her dress and seemed quite old.

"What is being your message, sir ?" She spoke.

"Excuse me ? A message for who ?" Neville was more and more confused. The magic from the Room had summoned an elf ?

"Yous be Requiring to sending a message, sir." The R was capitalised in her speech.

"What is your name ? Can you give a message to the people IN the Room ?"

"Sir, my names be Alon. Four Sirs in the Room, Sir, I gives them the message."

Neville was surprised. They had tried using house elves to pop in the Room but it had never worked. They also tried the Patronus but it failed too.

"Nice to meet you Alon. I have some questions. Can I only send one message ? Or could you relay multiple messages over time? Are you the only elf who can go inside ? We tried communicating with them but no other house elf could get in."

"Only Sirs inside the Room bes summoning elves. And Room is broken. Sir used Room magic, I be working until Sir says I done."

"Thank you Alon. I would love to send a message to my friend Harry, can you make sure the other three don't hear it ?" Neville continued after she nodded. "Please tell him I'm worried and I need to hear from him. Most of us are safe. We have everything under control but we need his advice on some things."

After another nod, Alon disappeared with the characteristic pop and Neville was alone once again. The hole in the ceiling was completely repaired and the Aurors were still unconscious. He carefully walked between the sleeping bodies and slipped back into the secret passages of Hogwarts.

Day 181 - 29/10/1998 - Severus remembers Halloween 81

Severus : 21 Lucius : 23 Tom : 38

Severus woke up with a gasp, his breathing erratic. Waking up from the nightmare of his memories, he disentangled himself from the pile of limbs in the huge bed and ran to the en suite bathroom. He vomited, profoundly sick to his stomach from the shock of his vision.

He had remembered 1981. Halloween. The death of one Lily Potter née Evans.

He had remembered, a week ago with his previous 'age up', his relaying the bits of prophecy he had overheard at the Hog's Head. He had remembered his Lord becoming obsessed with destroying any threat to his power.

Harry.

How could he lie in this bed, in the arms of the man who orphaned him? Did he know that Severus was the one to bring this horror into his life?

The pain of Lily's loss was acute. He knew he had collapsed at the news, in his first life. What was worse now was his love for Harry, eating him from the inside. How could he cherish this man if he was the one that had brought on his pain?

He could not withstand the sight of the two dark haired men embracing on the bed. Harry was peacefully sleeping, in a sandwich between Lucius and his mother's killer. The sight was surreal.

Severus had to wake them. This was intolerable. Why had Harry not told them?

He decided to wake Harry up silently, by caressing his face tenderly. The man's eyes opened sluggishly. He smiled at Severus when he saw him and nuzzled his face into Tom's chest like a cat.

"H-Harry, we need to talk." Severus' voice trembled and his vision was blurry with tears.

Harry looked alarmed and sat up quickly. He was completely awake now. Severus motioned for him to follow, signalling his need for silence with a finger on his lips.

They sneaked out of the bedroom, leaving the other two men sleeping. Harry followed Severus to the study, his eyebrows climbing on his forehead when he witnessed Severus locking the door and blocking all sounds.

"Sev, what's wrong? Are you okay?" Harry was visibly concerned.

"How can you love him Harry? Actually, how can you love me either?" Severus' voice was breaking and had stopped holding back his tears.

"What are you talking ab-" Harry stopped, frowning. "How old are you now Severus?"

"21."

Harry went pale as death. He all but flew to Severus' side to hug him fiercely. He brushed Severus' hair away from his face and kissed his temple. As devastated as Severus was, he was hunching over, revelling in the open affection Harry was granting him.

Harry held him until he could no longer feel Severus' frame shaking with sobs.

"There are a lot of things you don't know yet, Sev." Harry was hesitant. "I don't want to leave you hurting, but I also don't want you to have to deal with those issues now…"

"Please tell me all you know Harry. Most importantly, please tell me how you could still come to love us after we have brought such pain into your life."

"How is your Occlumency ?" Harry asked.

"I'm nearly as good as you, Harry, you know that." Severus said warily. "You're the one who helps me train."

Harry dragged Severus to a chair and had him sit. He stayed on his feet and began pacing as he thought of a way to explain. He looked both scared and enraged. His tumultuous emotions manifested themselves by waves of his magic flowing and receding in a miasma of power around him. Harry very rarely let his magic loose enough to become visible, adding another layer of concern for Severus. He was privately glad to see Harry express his emotions about the situation, as he was scared that Harry had selflessly sacrificed his pain for Voldemort's wants.

Severus had trouble thinking of Tom as anything but Voldemort at the moment. The last he had seen of the man, if he could still be called that, was a serpentine horror that had killed the only childhood friend Severus ever had.

He had cared deeply for Lily Evans, the muggleborn girl who had saved his soul from complete bitterness, result of his father's 'love'. She had been a great friend, had accepted him and his quirks, up until Severus had failed to control his temper and his words. He had tried apologising for his slip, but she had not wanted to hear it. He understood her. Had she been the one to insult him, perhaps on his upbringing or his looks, he would have not forgiven her either. He had lost her trust that day. But what he had just remembered was far worse. He had betrayed her far worse by relaying that prophecy than by using a slur against her. He had doomed not only Lily, but also her family. Her husband, Severus had no love for, but he could feel his loss for her, and most importantly Harry, who was marked by Voldemort and orphaned at merely one year of age.

Harry who apparently knew all that and still became his lover. Still became Voldemort's lover. That was the most unbelievable part of this whole situation, that Harry would love any of them if that is what they represented in his life.

A groan from Harry made Severus snap out of his thinking.

"It's so convoluted, and complicated and infuriating !" Harry had his hands in his hair, still pacing. "I'm not even sure I should tell you right now… You will have to keep it to yourself."

He stopped in front of Severus and planted his hands on both of his sides on the armrests. He looked intense and his magic was still volatile.

"You have to make sure that Tom never gets wind of any of this. It's imperative. We are locked together, if he goes mad, we're dead."

Severus nodded. He didn't understand the situation at all. Were they still talking about October 31st ?

"You were a rebel, Severus." Harry said. "Since that night, October 31st 1981, you became a rebel and a spy."

Severus' mind rebelled at the thought. He believed in the cause that Tom was fighting for. Even if he was horrified at the memory of that night. He had been shocked to witness his Lord become obsessed with this prophecy, but he still had faith in him and his ambition to change the Wizarding World.

"Try to remember what you did after that night, Sev." Harry encouraged him.

The violence of discovering his childhood friend dead had eclipsed anything that could have followed. The memory was as vivid as if it had been yesterday. He would have to put it in the Pensieve to alleviate the pain this was causing him.

He tried and focused on the aftermath. He remembered going straight to Dumbledore, the man he had tasked with protecting Lily, because she was Light and her Light Lord would get her to safety. The man had been unapologetic and had manipulated a distraught Severus into becoming a spy for him.

At that point, the horror had won and Severus had sold the most violent Death Eaters to justice, after the death of the Dark Lord had been announced officially. He had witnessed most other influential Death Eaters get pardons, by way of the Imperius defence.

When the dust had settled and he had gotten used to his new existence as a Light spy, he nurtured his pain and used it as a motivator to get to the hard truth. He used his newfound status to spy on the Dark and the Light, trying to understand what had happened to lead the political organization he joined to become a terrorist group. There were a lot of suspicious happenings.

The Light Lord had begun to lose some power in the last few years. The Dark Lord had gained numerous new followers, fresh from Hogwarts. They had been turned right under Dumbledore's nose, in his territory. The man had done nothing to stop this political tug of war and had instead begun weeding out some members of his Order, those he found undeserving of this honour. The Light side became more elitist and demanding. After the Dark Lord died, many were left without any support from the Light Lord that had demanded they commit less than savoury actions in his name. Dumbledore never even tried defending the Mutt from his 17 murder accusations, when, according to what Severus had gotten out of Lupin, he knew exactly who was the Secret-Keeper that had betrayed the Potters.

In the same time frame, the Dark Lord had steadily become more and more violent. That rise in violence was followed by a sharp decrease of any logic or critical thinking. He had become a shadow of his former self, suddenly obsessed by power, so much that his obsession was impeding his gaining of power, by making him appear unstable and untrustworthy. Most followers had been gained by proxies, preachers strategically positioned in the school and the ministry. The sensationalism that was a new part of Voldemort's platform was excessive but not too out of bounds for most of these new impressionable members. The Dark Side gained followers and lost credibility, conveniently right in the middle of negotiating a Wizengamot law to protect Dark creatures, by proxy of Lucius and Pius Thicknesse.

The circumstances surrounding the explosion of violence on the 31st of October 1981 had begun to look very suspicious by this point of Severus' research.

The prophecy itself had been made by a phony Seer, granddaughter of Cassandra Trelawney, riding on her fame to get her a job at Hogwarts. It was quite unprecedented to have a job interview for a Hogwarts employee in a pub instead of the Headmaster's office. Severus had hunted down Trelawney to make her tell him the rest of the prophecy. She was drunk and unwilling to talk to a former Death Eater elite, but he had no issue slipping into her alcool-addled mind to find the truth for himself. He finally got to hear the entirety of the prophecy.

"The one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord approaches... born to those who have thrice defied him, born as the seventh month dies... and the Dark Lord will mark him as his equal, but he will have power the Dark Lord knows not... and either must die at the hand of the other for neither can live while the other survives... the one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord will be born as the seventh month dies..."

The night of the tragedy, Dumbledore had made up some interpretation of the prophecy, knowing that Severus was the one who had overheard the first part of it. He had roped him into into protecting the Potter child until he was old enough to fight the Dark Lord anew. Dumbledore had him swear an Unbreakable Vow, which was no trouble for Severus as he had intended on watching over his dead friend's son.

After his research and having seen the murder scene, he knew that Lily had defended her son and that Harry had miraculously survived, only the lightning scar left as proof of the ordeal. According to the wording of the prophecy, he considered it completed.

He had apparently become Dumbledore's man by way of Unbreakable Vow, after the man had pronounced himself magical guardian of Harry Potter.

Severus' memories of 1981 ended there, with no clear explanation. He had a possibly fake prophecy, that should have been completed at this point anyway, a Light Lord gaining power and status after dealing with a newly violent threat and an orphan that was left to his own devices in the Muggle world for no good reason. He needed more information. He refused to think he had left things lying.

All this left him confused. There were peculiar circumstances but nothing that would explain why Harry loved him or Voldemort without issue. After revealing his memories to Harry and wordlessly asking for more information, he contemplated the implications of all this.

Before this day, he had thought he had been an influential member of a political party that had had to defend itself against a Ministry and a Light Side that misrepresented them and blocked any meaningful change to their society.

He was now very lost. The Dark Side had had become violent without provocation, the Light Side had been the only option against it, as the Ministry was, as always, pretty useless. He had caused an escalation of violence and the death of people he held dear. And he had become a spy, and publicly denounced fellow Death Eaters. How could he have come back to the Dark Side, and at such a high position too ?

Seeing that Severus was struggling with the amount of new information he had gained in the past 20 minutes, Harry decided to calm him down before they continued. He joined him on the large office chair, straddling his thighs, cradling his face between his palms as a way to capture Severus' attention. When he was sure to be at the forefront of Severus' mind, he began planting soft kisses on his lips, barely touching his mouth to the other's. His hands found themselves tracing delicate patterns on the man's cheeks, exploring the contours of his face. After a while, when Sev's heartbeat had calmed down, he rested their foreheads together.

"Hey. Welcome back."

That got a tiny smile out of Severus.

"Ready for the rest ? I promise it gets better… or at least not as bad ? Definitely more complicated though."

"I'm beginning to suspect everything in your life is complicated, Harry."

They exchanged smiles, still close to one another. Harry decided to stay in his lap for the rest of the explanation and sat sideways across his thighs, laying his head on Severus' shoulder.

"I'll give you the short version, otherwise we'll be there for days.

"You discovered that Dumbledore had fucked with people in order to restore his status in the Wizarding World and get rid of political opponents at the same convenient fucking time."

Harry's language denoted his feelings very clearly. He had nothing but pure hatred and anger in his heart for this man. This was surprising to Severus as Harry had always been pretty neutral when talking about the Light Lord before.

"All of this, the war -both wars actually-, my parent's deaths, most of my shitty life, was a machination to make him look like a hero to the population again. He wanted to manipulate me into being his sacrificial lamb, fighting against the monster he had created, so that he could be praised for engineering peace in our world.

"You amassed an enormous amount of evidence for all this in secret, becoming a double spy. By the time I arrived at Hogwarts at 11, you had a stockpile of memories, sworn testimonies, recordings and physical evidence of his machinations. You were also warped by his influence, becoming one of his most trusted and one of his most controlled.

"Even with all the pressure from him and from society, that expected you to be cruel and cold to me, you managed to slip enough information to me that I understood something was afoot.

"To make a long story short, I created a third faction in this war, the Shadow Side, Neutral, that recruits from all groups of people and aims to take control from the people who have abused us. We praise ourselves for our ethics, critical thinking and paranoid security checks.

"You were a secret member of our Side, as being a double spy was already complicated enough. You provided a lot of support, information and training for me and some select friends.

"When Voldemort came back, you regained your place at his side, to help us undermine his progress. We have been working to tear down both the Light and Dark sides for the past few years. And we have done it ! The Battle of Hogwarts was the culmination of our work, both sides pushed towards a final all-out battle because they had no other option, to defeat the ones they believed were depleting their forces.

"My generals should be continuing the work, finalising things as much as possible, without knowing what happened to both of us… The code we used in the Quibbler is not telling me much."

"So… You mean-" He looked flabbergasted. "I was not a double spy but a triple spy ? You were right when you said this was complicated. And it actually gives me more questions than answers."

"It took a long time for us to remove the entirety of the control Dumbledore put on you. He knew your mind was strong, and layered charms, potions and vows to make you his lackey. Even with all that…" Harry was back to caressing Severus' face, a look of absolute wonder on his face.

"Even with all that… you were still rebelling, and fighting for the truth to come out. Your mind is a marvel. You're the one who taught me Occlumency, in secret obviously. The level of focus it takes is impressive. The fact that you could keep three whole different mindsets separate, while keeping your sanity… You are so strong."

Harry was whispering his love along Severus's cheek, laying soft lips on his skin at random. His open adoration had Severus trembling, feeling more than undeserving of his regard. He began crying softly again.

"I have brought him to their doorstep. I'm the one who put a target on your parents Harry ! How can you see me this way, when I caused such misery ?"

"You followed your values and protected your Lord. He's the one who became violent out of nowhere and killed my parents. You are not responsible for their deaths, Sev. And even if you were, as soon as you discovered it, you defected and you spent the next 17 years working for truth and justice. I don't blame you for anything, but I know you do. So hear me, I forgive you, you have more than made up for your mistake Severus."

The heartfelt forgiveness was too much. Severus hid his face in the crook of Harry's neck, holding on to him for dear life. He was unable to deal with the roller-coaster of emotions that had taken place in the past 40 minutes. Harry passed his fingers through his hair, slowly helping him calm down.

"Let's imagine for a minute that I agree with that… How can you be okay with having your parent's murderer occupying your bed ? Nothing in your explanation could make that in any way acceptable."

"That's a conversation for another time, Sev, we've been away for a long time, they might wake up. But be sure that I would never love him that freely if I didn't have a good reason. My parents gave their lives to protect me and I would never let their sacrifice go to waste."

Seeing his earnest expression, Severus believed him. He had trusted Harry for so long it seemed, he would just continue to trust him and wait for a more appropriate time.

He had many questions, but he had time to deal with them later. For now he set to marking Harry's neck, to create a good excuse for their absence. He could be possessive when the mood struck him.

Day 182 - 30/10/1998 - Working on the outside

Severus : 21 Lucius : 24 Tom : 38

Alon had explained the rules of the Room of Requirement to Neville and how he could and couldn't contact his Lord.

Harry hated being called a Lord but that was his position, and Neville took traditions very seriously. Pureblood as he was, he had been raised to show a certain amount of respect to Lords and Ladies. Apart from Heads of families, Lords and Ladies held responsibilities and status that was inaccessible for most. In the past few centuries, the title had been applied to Heads of families as a way to simplify social hierarchy for Muggleborns. Neville didn't think it simplified anything, as they now used the same title for people in vastly different positions.

Lords and Ladies were chosen by the people when a person held influence and power over others. It wasn't a self-appointed position or a predestined one. The faith of their followers was pure magic and elevated them. They gained awareness of their followers and their wishes, the amount of faith they all exuded. The strength they gained from their followers made them formidable, and capable of greatness. Most of Wizarding history was written following the work of Lords and Ladies.

Neville showed his deference to his Lord by following his wishes to be treated as equal to his followers… most of the time. What Harry didn't know couldn't hurt him. So he applied his faith here in his study in the Longbottom Manor, focusing on his Lord and lending him his strength. His grandma had been overjoyed when she had been told that Neville was a General in the ranks of the most powerful Lord since Merlin. She had been even prouder when she discovered that the Shadow Lord, as he was called by his followers, had allied tradition and progress. He was the only Lord active in their lifetime that had followed the rite of bonding with his followers, giving to them in return for their faith. They could feel him, knowing he was alive and well had been quite useful in the first few weeks after the Battle of Hogwarts, and also call for him if need be. As he was unavailable now, all communications had been dropped.

But Alon had managed to get in and out of the Room and had come back with a short note, the writing recognizable as Harry's chicken scratch. He'd said he was okay and working on a way to open communication with them again. And that his mission had been pushed up and going well.

The mission was the most perilous and unnecessary bullshit ever thought up, at least according to Draco. Harry wanted to seduce a Dark Lord, Merlin knew why. He worked so hard and was so dedicated to his people that his Generals hadn't put up any fight when they first heard his idea.

They would follow him anywhere he wanted to go, as long as he was the Harry Potter that worked for their interests.

Their takeover was nearly complete, Harry could have his pet Dark Lord if he wanted to.

Luna had enlisted some help to move their education into the light of day. It was time to be more visible. This was why they needed to contact Harry as soon as possible. He was the coordinator. They could do without him if they absolutely had to , but none of them wanted to.

Alon was sent with a new message, informing Harry that a two-way notebook had been placed within the pages of a book in the Hogwarts Library. He was to try and summon the book from his bookcase. With a little luck, they could soon communicate more freely with him.

The first issue would be fixing the Room of Requirement to ensure their Lord's safety and optimise their line of communication. After that, they had to reveal themselves to the Wizarding World, hoping that their positions in the Ministry would hold during the storm.

"Hey Nev ! Good day for a bit of a nap, isn't it ?"

Draco was always tired these days, and always seeking Neville out. He had lost count of the number of times they had slept together. Both of them were under a lot of stress and in an uncomfortable position of power. Draco liked working from the shadows, but with Harry otherwise occupied, he had to step more into the lime light. He just needed a bit of a cuddle to get him back on the rails.

"Great idea Draco, I was wondering when you would drop by." A musical voice answered him.

Neville hadn't noticed Luna coming in, but there she was, lying upside down on the sofa. She was more resilient than them, more used to the constant stress. But she joined them often enough. Every worry would be soothed by a bit of skin contact. She looked gorgeous, with her hair splayed on the ground, her glittering eyes focused on them. She was mesmerising to both of them.

She moved like in a dream, slow and purposeful, with an ethereal glow. Neville startled when he felt her skin on his, her finger lighting a path of shivers on his bare arm. She moved to straddle him on his chair, pushing his hair from his face and inviting Draco with a gesture of her hand. He obviously ran to her, as taken with their lethal angel as Neville felt.

She knew the effect she had on them and used it to her advantage, wrapping them around her little finger more often than not. She was as sweet as she was dangerous, which was a discovery they made on their joining the Shadow. She was in charge of education, and if education failed, she was also in charge of making people disappear, quite permanently.

The duality of her was obvious to anyone who looked, but Luna was often overlooked. As they all were, really. Even Draco, with his influential father, was dismissed as a spoiled brat of a pretty boy. He applied his strategic mind and his ruthlessness to their cause far more readily when he realised they would embrace him for it. No more grasping at straws to be noticed. They recognised his abilities and he rose up the ranks quickly.

He kissed Luna slowly, savouring her mouth tasting of the million-flavor candy she was fond of. He then swapped for kissing Neville, the most understated Pureblood heir, the most powerful man in their ranks just in terms of his family. The quiet boy who observed had a lot of blackmail and persuasive material to manipulate people to do his bidding.

Draco couldn't have stopped himself from falling in love even if he had been conscious of it at the time. He had a thing for power, just like every self-respecting Slytherin.

He let him and Luna exchange kisses while he settled the study for Neville. Sensitive material was hidden, two-way mirrors covered and the light extinguished. Then he pulled his lovers to the bedroom for some well-deserved rest.

Day 191 - 8/11/1998 - Dumbledore's involvement

Severus : 21 Lucius : 25 Tom : 40

"Some of my memories don't make sense." Tom was frowning while slicing tomatoes. It was his turn to cook this night and he had chosen to revisit a meal he had discovered during his visit of Turkey.

He'd prepared the lamb, seasoned with hearty spices, the yogurt sauce with garlic and honey, as well as the hummus. All was left was to warm the pita bread and place the ingredients inside, accompanied with the slices of tomato and some salad.

He placed all ingredients on plates and Lucius put them on the garden table, where they would share dinner. The Room had some trouble with keeping track of the seasons and they were now in the midst of a week-long summer. They ate in the garden these days, to take advantage of the weather.

Severus had complained that his plants needed the seasons to keep their schedule, and had been working all week to protect and heal the specimens that had suffered from the sudden heat. He was now finishing on some charms that Lucius had helped him devise, to ward the whole garden against sudden weather changes.

"What do you mean, darling ?" Lucius asked while juggling with three plates, trying to keep them afloat with a flick of his wand. He planted a kiss on Tom's cheek before floating the plates to the table.

"Decisions that I don't understand, thoughts that I don't follow, actions that make no sense. It's like I'm watching someone else's life. My personality would never fit in the man that I see."

"So you grew up, I for one think it's a good thing." Lucius laughed. "If we stayed the same all our lives, we wouldn't get anywhere."

While Lucius had a point, Tom's comment had piqued Harry's interest.

"Wait lovely, I think this might be something else." He said. "Tom, can you explain it in more detail?"

Seeing Harry taking him seriously made Tom think again on his memories. They unsettled him when he got them first but he couldn't understand why. The divide between what he saw and who he was was quite large. He couldn't reconcile the two.

"I don't know how to explain it really… It's a tendency to be more impulsive, a quickness to anger, a complete refusal to compromise, and it's getting stronger with time. At first I just thought it was my personality, me getting more confident with time, but this is getting dangerous."

"Any fluctuations in the speed of its progression ? If you're closer or farther from Britain ? What about closeness with your Horcruxes ?"

"Now that you talk about it…" He took a moment to compare his memories. "Maybe it's a bit slower when I'm closer to my Horcruxes. And it definitely stops growing when I'm out of the country. How did you know ? What is it ?"

A sigh. "I should have expected it would have begun far before the wars. This somehow makes it better and worse at the same time…"

The three men looked at Harry inquisitively. Severus had an inkling this had something to do with the conversation he'd had with Harry a week before. They didn't get the time to continue that talk, but maybe he would get more information now.

"Something similar happened to a lot of the people surrounding Dumbledore, from both Sides. This was actually what convinced me that I needed to do something against him. My Godfather was suffering from the same thing, amongst many others. That's how I discovered it and how we found a way to counter it. It's a Dark curse that warps personalities. Care to let me check your mind for its presence ? We wouldn't want you to fall back on bad habits, would we ?"

Alarmed at the thought such a spell could still be active in his mind, Tom nodded rapidly and moved to sit on the couch near Harry. Their Horcrux link could not give access to his entire mindscape, but only to what he let transpire. Harry would have to use Legilimency.

Harry caught Tom's chin and turned his face towards his own, so that he would have an unobstructed view of Tom's eyes. He focused on their colour, a vibrant teal, result of absorbing power from Harry's Horcrux. "Legilimens." He whispered. And tumbled down in a fractured mindscape.

More than half of it was neatly organized, but the rest of it was in shambles. Harry could see the places the Horcruxes' creation had torn Tom apart. Some of his childhood memories were missing, his feelings were muted and his intellect was dulled in some subjects. Harry would deal with those effects later, he had a mission. The curse was recognizable once he found the thread. It was like a spider's web, connecting things that should stay separate, making knots and pathways so that the same conclusions were reached in multiple situations. Given more time, the web would overtake the normal functioning of Tom's mind and give him a rigid framework to interpret the world, like a thousand biases all leading to the same results : anger and obsession.

Now that he knew it was there, he noticed some worrying threads. It looked like the parts of Tom's mind altered by the Horcruxes had once been part of the web. There were only snapped threads to attest to its once there connection. Those threads could only mean one thing, the web had been spinned before Tom created the first of his Horcruxes. That would mean…

Harry dived out with a gasp. Tom had been controlled since childhood. This was far worse than what they had already found out. How far did Dumbledore's machinations go ?

"Harry ? Was it there ?" Tom asked anxiously.

"It's worse than I thought…"

"Shit, can we fix it ?" Lucius had taken Tom's hand in his, trying to comfort the man.

"Ah sorry ! No it's pretty tame for now, we can take it out easily. The curse must have re-initialized when you were hit with the de-aging spell. It's only been months, it's not very strong." He sent Tom a reassuring smile.

"What's worse than you thought ? Did you know about this ?" Tom looked wary now.

"Kind of. I suspected you were afflicted with the curse before the first war. It would make sense that your surge of violence would be caused by this curse."

"So that's why I turned away from politics and into terrorism ? A curse… ruined decades of work."

"I don't want to kick you when you're down, but this curse appeared to precede the creation of your first Horcrux…"

Silence fell as they all understood the implications of this statement.

"I was cursed as a child." Tom's icy power stretched between them.

"Who ?" Electricity was beginning to gather around Lucius, betraying his rage.

"Dumbledore." They turned to Harry. "All the people suffering from this curse, at least the ones we managed to find, were cursed by the same person. Albus Dumbledore. We knew that he'd been doing it for a few years before the first war. I never imagined he'd done it before that…" Suddenly he shot up and ran to the study, retrieving the notebook he'd taken to writing in every day.

"This is a line of communication with my allies. I have to tell them to postpone our operations. This discovery changes everything. We need to gather more information."

He wrote furiously in the notebook, threw down his quill, whispered a charm and closed the notebook. The binding glowed for a second, then returned to normal. The message had been sent.

Harry began pacing, thinking hard about his plans.

Severus picked up the notebook and opened it, but nothing was legible. He saw some text but could not read any of it. It seemed Harry had the presence of mind to keep his privacy, even when he revealed a bit.

Harry stopped pacing and rushed over to Tom, planting a kiss on his lips. "Thank you for telling me. Without you we would have lost everything by being too sure of ourselves. Also I know how to rid you of the curse's influence, don't worry."

"We should all check each other's minds, just to be sure." Lucius said, looking uneasy. "The mere thought that something like this could have happened without us realising it…" He shivered.

Severus designated himself to check Harry's mind, with Tom looking into Lucius' pale eyes. Finally, Harry checked Severus. Lucius showed some slight webbing, while Severus and Harry didn't.

"We do regular checks in my group of friends, knowing that this curse exists made us quite paranoid." Harry justified himself. "And knowing Severus and his impenetrable mind, I'm not surprised they couldn't get the curse to stick !" He laughed.

"Let's eat before it gets cold." Tom lead them to their dinner. "How do we break the curse Harry ?"

After taking a bite of his pita and moaning at the delicious taste of the spiced lamb, Harry answered.

"It's a simple purifying ritual. Some latin chant, some incense and some garlic and you'll be fine. Pass me the sauce, please."

They laughed at him, far too taken with the food to worry about anything else.

Tom laughed a bit, before risking a look towards Severus. He was hiding something, and Tom would discover the truth. Soon.

Day 201 - 18/11/1998 - Duel tournament

Severus : 22 Lucius : 26 Tom : 42

After the stress of dealing with the spider web curse, they all decided that they needed to relax. And what better way to relax than hexing each other ?

They decided on a duel tournament. They would all fight each other, allowing for breaks, so that they could have a fair comparison. The one with the most wins would get a massage from the others. A comprehensive massage.

They began with Lucius. He first went against Harry. The duel was quick and set the mood quite well. They were all very competitive and took this tournament quite seriously. After they bowed to each other, Lucius sent spell after spell, most of them unknown to Harry. The only thing he could do was hold a shield and duck. He barely had the opportunity to reply to these attacks. He knew his stamina was not the best, and ducking all the time was sucking his energy out. He needed to retaliate. The only way he could face the barrage of attacks was to overload his shield charm with raw power, sending a literal shockwave towards Lucius, who was blown away. He fell on his side and Harry took the opportunity to bind him and take his wand.

Harry 1 - Lucius 0

After a short break when Harry repaid Lucius for the barrage of attacks with a barrage of questions about the spells he had used, they began again. It was Tom's turn. The duel went pretty much the same way, but this time both opponents knew of obscure spells. Lucius still had Tom running around to evade his spells, but Tom lost his patience pretty quickly and simply overpowered Lucius with a slash of wind. Lucius fell again and was promptly tied up and disarmed.

Tom 1 - Lucius 0

At that point Lucius was mad. He knew he was a good duellist, if only his boyfriends were not stupidly overpowered. He was also quite tired of falling.

He only took a quick break before all but dragging severus to the duelling grounds. This duel was far longer than the other ones. Lucius was imaginative in his spells and tactics, but severus was slippery. It seemed he could teleport from one place to another. He never Apparated though, he was just so light on his feet that he seemed to. He appeared behind Lucius and surprised him multiple times, but never got a good spell to land. The two of them had the most durability and could continue forever if need be. But Lucius wanted to win. And he was a Slytherin. "Harry !" He screamed, as if their lover was in danger. This, coupled with the artful look of horror on his face, distracted Severus long enough that Lucius could get the drop on him and restrain him.

Lucius 1- Severus 0

Lucius would not win this tournament but he had at least managed to win a duel, as he knew himself to be able to. He took his place on the spectators chair and let an unrepentant grin stretch his mouth. Severus was fuming.

Tom wanted to go again, and convinced Severus to reinvest his anger in a new battle. He had to lure him in with some sweet words of how he would take his revenge on the blond later with Tom's help, but he got him to move. It didn't help that Harry was cuddling Lucius and congratulating him on his victory with languorous kisses. It seemed that mischief like this was Harry's cup of tea. Well Severus could do that. Yes he could.

He kissed Tom before taking his place on the duelling grounds. A little sweetness to make the sour taste of defeat more palatable to Tom. Because Severus would win. He was extremely focused and nothing would get him distracted this time. He and Tom were pretty well matched. Tom had more raw power but he was cocky and far too static. Severus was slippery and it was now impossible to catch him in one spot more than half a second. He didn't know many obscure spells but he knew ones that he had made up himself, and thus were completely unexpected. Tom was pushing too much power in his spells, making them less accurate. Severus had him trapped in a spider web, but Tom had not yet realised. He was always reappearing where Tom didn't expect him and going faster and faster. After a moment of playing with his food, Severus dived in, rushing close to Tom, stopping millimeters away from him and pecking him on the mouth before whispering "Immobulus". The Dark Lord had been defeated by a first-year spell.

Severus 1 - Tom 1

When Tom realised he had lost, he swiftly took Severus in his arms and proceeded to devour his mouth. Apparently, having a partner capable of beating him in a dual was a turn on. Harry jumped into his arms and covered him with kisses as soon as Tom let him down. Yes, that was victory. He blew Lucius a kiss, showing off a bit. It was always good to show your competence.

Harry dragged him back to the battle ground after a short pause, excited to see if severus could beat him also. Harry was pretty mobile when he fought and thus managed to evade Severus' attacks and deal some, by speed alone. Severus had given his all for his previous duel and was not giving his best performance now. He thought that beating the Dark Lord was proof that he could beat anyone. And then Harry surprised him. He ran up to Severus, dived down, kicking his legs from under him and straddling the man. He then tore the wand from Severus' lax grasp. In his surprise at the unconventional duel technique, Severus let Harry take the victory by not even trying to defend himself once he was on his back. He was cocky at his victor against the Dark Lord, and had forgotten that Harry was as much of a Lord, the Shadow. Harry sweetened the deal with a deep kiss, leaving Severus out of breath, admiring the beaming victor.

Harry 2 - Severus 1

Now came the last duel. They knew this duel was serious. Because Harry and Tom were cuddling and complimenting each other. Absolutely serious. They managed to tear themselves away from each other after a while. Only to continue to sing each other's praises on the way. And with a last kiss for the road.

As soon as they finished bowing to each other, the focus was back. They both regarded the other with malice and confidence. They knew what the other was capable of. There was a brief silence while they waited for the other to make the first move. They began at the same time, smirking. They both went with raw power right off the bat. Their magic meeting in the middle was explosive and beautiful. The shower of sparkles illuminated the scene, rendering it worthy of being immortalised in a painting. They didn't move, relying on their power. No incantations crossed their lips as they settled for an intense showdown. Manipulating raw magic was difficult and Harry had only managed to grasp the basics. It's not like he'd had much opportunity to train this ability. He would never use such a move against people who couldn't defend themselves from it. That was ultimately his downfall. Tom had much more experience in this domain and knew to branch out his magic to attack on multiple fronts as one. Harry held out for a while, but his body caved after a time. He couldn't take multiple assaults without flinching. He collapsed, exhausted. But he was proud of himself. A full-frontal assault from the Dark Lord, and he had given it his all.

Tom 2 - Harry 2

No victor this time. They decided on a well deserved nap before more physical activities.

Day 209 - 26/11/1998 - Lucius remembers Halloween 81

Severus : 23 Lucius : 27 Tom : 43

Severus and Lucius were reading in the study on this thursday afternoon, while Harry and Tom worked on planning Room repairs with Harry's allies. Lucius had been fidgeting all day. He kept braiding and unbraiding his hair, changed positions in his chair every twenty seconds and threw looks at the open door leading to the living-room where he saw Harry.

Severus was tired of the shuffling and had an idea what could be bothering Lucius. The calendar they kept in the kitchen also showed the expected dates they would recover memories. Lucius had remembered Halloween 1981. He shut the door with a flick of his wand and went ot sit on his boyfriend's lap. Immobilising Lucius was always the best way to make him talk. He had nowhere to put his nervous energy but where Severus wanted him to put it.

"Talk, and remember, I'm 23 this week."

Lucius was more relieved than startled. He never knew how to broach the subject.

"I remembered 1981 yes." A silence. "How does he do that ?"

"Do what ?"

"Love us. I remembered the birth of my son. I would eviscerate anyone who touched him. I can't understand how he can love the people responsible for his parent's deaths."

"He says he has good reasons and that we'll remember them. Later." Severus tucked a strand of Lucius' hair behind his hair and rested his head against his shoulder. "I don't know if we should believe him. He is far too self-sacrificial fro his own good."

"I had pretty much nothing to do with their deaths and I feel terrible. I can't imagine how Tom will feel." That was an aspect that Severus had not envisioned. He didn't really want to think about that.

"Tell me about your family." He asked instead.

"I remembered about him last week. He was a wriggly little sausage with blond hair. Now he is a toddler. It feels alien and at the same time completely normal. I love him with all my heart. And I'm so scared that I will treat him how my parents treated me. Narcissa didn't have the best upbringing either. What if we irreparably damage him ?"

"All parents begin at the same point, with no idea what to do. I'm sure you figured it out. And Narcissa wouldn't let you treat her son with nothing but love." He smirked. That woman was formidable.

"I had to deny being a Death Eater. After the dust settled."

"Mmmh. I know. It was the best thing you could have done."

"I had to. My loyalty for a dead man was putting my family in danger. I would always protect them. Even if Cissa is less wife than best friend, she is my family and I love her."

Severus looked up at that. "I thought you fell in love with her after a while. You may have married because your parents decided it so, but you were so close, I assumed…"

"No. We had sex, and we had a child, and we loved each other very much. But we were not in love. At least, not that I remember. She was the best wife I could ever have had. We were best friends. It just seems like I don't fall in love easily. Which is mystifying because I managed to fall with all three of you."

"Love is unpredictable. I don't think any of us would have believed in this relationship. These things just happen." He kissed Lucius' cheek. "Does it feel like you are cheating on her ?"

"Wa had our respective lovers, cheating didn't exist." Lucius hummed. "I guess Harry would call it an open relationship ? We were loyal to each other but that loyalty was beyond sex."

"The more I think about it, the more I believe loyalty is a Slytherin trait. Loyalty to specific people and to our values. We are defined by our loyalties."

"That's why denying my faith in my Lord was so painful to me. I managed to find other ways to make it known and keep it alive. As far as I remember, I had planned on taking an active role in politics to manipulate things the way my Lord would have wanted. It's hard to juggle my love for my family and my faith in the Lord… Your way of doing was even more difficult I imagine, pretending to take the Light's side, turning spy in their ranks. I couldn't have done it."

"We both made sacrifices for our values and for our futures. I think that's what Harry saw in us. Our drive for what we thought to be just."

"I sure hope so. I would hate to lose him, to lose them. They are my family too, now. You are my family Severus. Never forget that."

"That is the sweetest thing you could ever say to me, lovely. Thank you." Lucius deposited a sweet kiss on Severus' brow, letting the man take a nap in his arms. He was nervous about the future, but he knew that he could count on Severus. The man needed a loving family, and he would be it for him.