Hey guys! I'm so sorry for the long delay in posting this final (!) chapter. My inspiration and motivation to finish this story left me for a short while there and I'm quite proud I finally managed to finish this baby. I might not have finished the fic without the constant support and nagging (:-D in a good way!) of icewitch73 and Wolf's Edge. You are great, thanks a lot for this, I needed the kick in the ass every once in a while. *lol*

Also special thanks to annavale23, MonstersDream, Alkeni, flmatheus, bhut, Kajtena, R. Peter, Foxx, Carter, Koda, R. Connor, Subakun-sensei, AdamBolton, VMars Lover and one guest.

I hope you enjoy this last chapter. Thanks for reading.

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A knock on his bunk door woke Ward from a restful sleep.

He sat up quickly, shaking off any remaining bleariness in a split second and bringing himself to alertness with a swiftness born from a lifetime of practice. A quick look at the built-in alarm clock on the wall confirmed that it was morning already, but what had him taking a double look at the glowing digits was the realization that he had overslept. It was 7 o'clock. He always rose at 5.30, not even his time in Vault D had made him break that habit. What the hell had happened? Yeah, he had gone to bed rather late last night after drinking beer with Skye and Hunter and it had been the best evening he had had in ages, but that was hardly an excuse, right?

Another knock got him out of bed swiftly. He opened the door and came face to face with Skye. The frown of impatience on her forehead slowly evened out as her eyes darted up and down his body quickly, taking in his rumpled appearance. The slight uptick of her lips and the mischievous glint in her eyes did not bode well for him.

"Oh. My. God," she drawled, making a show to appear scandalized. "I woke you up. Never thought I'd see the day I'd be up earlier than you. Or was the early-bird-catches-the-worm-routine part of your cover as well? That would've been truly evil of you."

There was still a slight barb to her words, but Ward was not inattentive enough to miss that her words meant basically one thing: after a nice yesterday evening, they were not back to square one in the morning. Skye had decided to continue to treat him like a human being and not like a monster. And he was very grateful for that. Which is why he decided to play along and roll his eyes at her.

"Very funny," he replied steadily. "Never thought I'd see you up and functioning before twelve o'clock, especially without no one at your side making sure you're not crawling back into your bunk again. Did May kick you out of bed? I must ask her for tips later."

"Don't," Skye warned, scrunching up her nose and turning a tad more serious. "I don't think she's ready to be civil around you yet. No need to add more black and blue to that already battered face of yours."

Ward winced a bit in reply. Yep, he definitely had enough scrapes and bruises to show for the next few weeks.

"But you are?" he asked hesitantly, after a short silence. "Ready to be civil around me, I mean."

Skye thought for a moment that seemed rather long in his opinion, but she finally nodded her head. "I guess I am, yeah."

Ward gave a nod at that. It seemed a small gesture, especially since that answer made his heart pick up its speed and suddenly painted his world in brighter colors. Still, a nod had to be enough right now.

Clearing her throat, Skye motioned with her head over her shoulder and said, "Come on, you got five minutes to shower, then Coulson wants to talk to you."

Nodding again, he let himself be accompanied to the showers and then to Coulson's office. Her attendance felt friendly enough and he almost let himself forget what her constant presence at his side actually meant: it was nothing else than supervision. Still, despite that knowledge, he found himself enjoying her company and he suddenly knew with a pang that he would miss her as soon as he was out of this base. Whatever he had felt for her, it was not completely gone.

He let himself get so distracted with the what-could-have-beens that he only found himself wondering about what Coulson wanted from him when he was entering the director's office. Bad form, really bad form.

An unfamiliar man stood to Coulson's right. Middle-aged, rather tall, dark-skinned, wearing a light blue dress shirt with the two top buttons left open casually. No tie and there was a pen in his breast pocket. Soft hands, so no field agent. Intelligent eyes that scrutinized him with practice and skill and something that Ward had a hard time to put his finger on. Professional kindness? Yeah, that might just be it.

Ward narrowed his eyes at the other man and then turned his attention to Coulson.

"A shrink? Really?" he threw at the director, aiming for a flippant tone so the others would not notice his underlying uneasiness and uncertainty at this unforeseen development. "Is this some kind of hidden camera joke?"

Coulson exchanged a glance with the dark-skinned man and then said to the other with a quiet sigh, "I told you he is good. And difficult."

"I can see that," the dark-skinned man muttered back.

"Ward," Coulson said, "this is Dr. Andrew Garner. He is a forensic psychologist, the best there is. I worked with him for many years now and there is no one I trust more in this."

Ward kept his expression blank because he could already feel the shrink's probing eyes on him. "Yeah? What's 'this' then? Because I'm rather sure I have no idea why you brought him here."

"As I understand, Mister Ward," Garner started to explain, fixing Ward with a steady gaze, "you recently suffered from the effects of a powerful mind drug which made you relive some traumatic events from the past."

Ward stared at the other man and though he was tempted to snarl at Garner, he kept his voice completely emotionless when he replied, "This is none of your concern, doc."

"Ward," Skye now butted in, looking up at him with imploring eyes. "Andrew is a good man and one of the best at what he does. Look, he helped me when I struggled with my powers and I wasn't too thrilled to see a psychologist either, but I never regretted it. He only wants to help you."

"Yeah, well, I'm happy seeing a shrink worked for you," Ward replied and could not quite keep the scorn out of his voice. "But know what? I don't need his help."

What the hell was going on? Why was Skye trying to convince him to let anyone mess with his head? Had it all been a ruse? Had Coulson ordered Skye to be nice to him in order to mellow his resistance so that he could eventually be talked into spilling his heart out to a fucking shrink? He hated to be played and he could not quite shake the feeling that he was used as a pawn in a much bigger game once again. The tentative trust he had built back up when it came to his old team vanished very quickly into thin air.

Ward glowered at the director, being unable to keep his anger completely in check, then snapped, "This is not part of our agreement, Coulson. You promised to let me go. I'm fine now, so let me walk. Or I might have to fight my way out of here."

"Calm down, Ward" Coulson requested with a frown, then ordered, "Sit, we need to talk."

Just like it had happened before, Ward's legs wanted to obey the direct order and walk over to the chair that waited for him, but he caught himself before that. No, it was about time to find out what happened if he refused his impulse to obey Coulson's orders.

"I'll remain standing," he replied flatly, crossing his arms.

"Fine, suit yourself," Coulson answered and Ward thought he heard an undertone of annoyance in his voice, before he turned to Skye, "Please leave us alone, Skye."

She nodded and turned around, but not before shooting Ward a last beseeching glance. The door fell shut behind her and though there was no click to be heard, he was rather sure it was locked now.

Coulson and Garner walked over to the couch and sat down while Ward remained standing in the middle of the room. His brain had long ago started to calculate his options should he need to make a quick escape from this room. The glass to his right did not look bulletproof, he was rather sure he could throw himself through it if necessary. There was no way to know how high up he was, but he guessed he would survive that fall. However, there was also a rather big chance that the area just outside was under surveillance. Everything else would just be naive. So he probably would not get very far. Still, if they pushed him, he would take his chances.

"I asked Andrew to come to the Playground out of very specific reasons," Coulson began in a slow and carefully measured voice. "Yesterday, you told me that you suspected that the mind drug would make you compliant to me. We took another blood sample and..."

"Seriously?" Ward interrupted him, voice deadly quiet. "Are you fucking kidding me? I told you that confidentially and I had your word that this would stay among us. Does keeping your word really mean nothing to you? You guys are really unbelievable. You're a secret organization, for fuck's sake, you should know how to keep things to yourself! If Hydra agents had gone blabbering out every fucking secret someone told them it would've probably never gone farther than the first two people before being found out."

"Which would've been a good thing, right?" Garner butted in innocently enough.

Ward narrowed his eyes at him and bit out through gritted teeth, "Not the point."

"Are you done?" Coulson asked him with an almost fatherly patience. "Because I got my reasons, the question just is if you want to hear them."

Ward glared at them for a moment longer, before he finally reined in his temper and gave a short nod. There was no point in throwing a tantrum now, the damage was already done.

"Thank you," the director said evenly. "As I said, we had your blood tested again, because you suspected lasting after-effects of the serum in your system." Coulson paused shortly, before he continued, "The testing came back negative. There's not even a trace of the serum in your body anymore. You're completely clean."

Ward stared, while his mind tried to process what he had just heard. It could not be! He had been so very sure about this. How could it be that he felt like a mindless slave as soon as he heard an order from Coulson's mouth if not as a result of brainwashing? This made no sense, no sense at all.

"I... I don't understand," he finally choked out, still staring at Coulson. "Maybe something's wrong with the method of testing."

"Simmons talked to Maggie Bates yesterday evening," the director replied. His eyes were shining in a peculiar way that was hard to describe. Like all of this was really important and that he cared about the outcome. Without warning, Ward felt his throat tighten painfully. "The result of your blood test corresponds with what Bates told us about the ingredients of the serum. Not a trace of which is in your system anymore, Ward."

Swallowing heavily, Ward replied, "But it can't be. I know what I experienced. What I experience now. It's not pleasant."

"This is where I come in," the psychologist spoke up, fixing Ward with kind eyes. "I can very well understand that this feeling of compliance and obedience is unpleasant for you. However, it's not a physiological or pharmaceutical issue. It's a psychological issue."

Again, Ward could not do much more than stare. Maybe pinching himself would help...? This was one hell of a strange dream.

"Phil gave me your files, both the official material and the information Skye dug up in the last few days," Garner continued evenly. "As far as I can see, John Garrett submitted you to extensive and long-term psychological indoctrination, which made you heavily dependent on him. It's also colloquially called 'brainwashing', so if someone asks – yes, you've been brainwashed. Just not the way you thought you were."

"It's not what happened," Ward denied tonelessly, though it sounded weak even to his own ears. "He was the only one who cared about me."

"Maybe he did," Garner conceded, folding his hands together. "People sometimes do terrible things to the ones they care about. But it doesn't change the fact that he systematically shaped you after his wishes and made you reliant on his orders. It's why you thought your life was meaningless in the first few weeks and months after his death. Three suicide attempts – that's pretty drastic."

Even though the whole thing became more and more surreal to Ward, he did not miss the reproachful look Garner shot Coulson or the way Coulson winced and averted his eyes.

"You would've needed help back then," the psychologist continued, sternness and kindness equally mixed. "Since you didn't get it, you tried to cope with everything in another way – by repressing every thought about your role of dependency when it comes to Garrett. You tried to tell yourself that you've always been on top of each and every decision you made. It's not true. And I think that the serum brought up not only your memories, but also your old patterns and your deeply ingrained need for guidance. Since Phil here comes closest to Garrett of all the people on the base and he's the one in charge, you latched onto him."

"Look," Ward intervened, trying to get on top of the whole situation again. Even though he was shaking internally at what he heard, he used every trick he knew to appear unflappable. "I see that you're a very clever guy and that you gave my 'case' much thought. Still, I don't think that's what happened. Maybe the serum still had influence over me even though it couldn't be detected in my blood anymore, who knows. Weirder things have happened – for example aliens invading New York. As long as you tell me it'll pass, I'll be happy."

Garner gave him a rather sad smile. "That's exactly the thing: it won't pass. Not until we start analyzing and working on what happened to you."

The silence that followed was heavy. Ward somehow had a hard time to bring his surroundings into focus. Could it be true...? Could he be so messed up that he craved orders? That thought alone was enough to wake an urge to smash that stupid head of his repeatedly against the concrete wall. Maybe this would help him chase away that ridiculous notions.

"Ward," Coulson began slowly. "I thought long and hard about this and I want to make you an offer. You helped us out for quite a while now. Though you haven't exactly been a model guest since you've been brought to the Playground, I can still see that you mean me and my team no harm. I also see that you regret what you've done. This is why I want you to stay and work for your redemption. I'm sure we could work out terms that are agreeable to you." He paused and let the words sink in, before he continued more sternly, "However, regular sessions with Andrew are mandatory, I can tell you that already. So is wearing a tracker, at least for the next few months. I talked with Simmons about that and even though she spent the better half of an hour to convince me to send you away instead, she finally told me that the best way is to have you wear the tracker as an implant. It would only be a small procedure and it would make sure you wouldn't be able to get rid of it as easily as you did with the bracelet."

Ward let the words wash over him, almost too numb to actually comprehend their meaning. What was he even supposed to do? He chose to stay silent, which prompted Coulson to continue.

"It's a second chance," the director added meaningfully, trying to catch Ward's gaze. "To do good, make things right. What do you say?"

Clearing his throat, Ward replied hoarsely, "I don't know. I'm not sure this is a good idea."

His answer made Coulson smile slightly. "Sure it's a good idea, after all, I came up with it, right? Give it a try."

Ward hesitated. Everything happened too fast, he needed more time to mull this over, he needed...

"Simmons is already waiting for you with the tracker implant," Coulson suddenly continued, his voice taking on a final quality. "This is important, because I still want to protect the team. I know that you want to protect the team, too, because that's what you've been doing in the last few months whenever you were helping us out. However, you better take Skye with you when you're going to get the tracker implanted, because Simmons still refuses to be alone with you. It'll be a hard road, to get back into the good graces of the team."

And just like that, Ward suddenly knew what he had to do. Like being stopped abruptly by a rope after a long fall, his surroundings all at once stopped turning madly and finally slowed down enough for him to catch up with what was happening around him. All of a sudden, the path lay before him, clear as day.

He took a deep breath and then gave a determined nod. "Okay, let's do that."

Coulson gave him a brilliant smile, then got up and walked over to shake his hand.

"Very good. I'm happy you decided to take that chance. I'm sure you do the right thing here," the director said, then added after a short pause, "It's best when you let the tracker be implanted right now and we'll discuss the details later on, alright?"

"Yes, sir," Ward answered dutifully and then turned to leave.

"I'll see you around then, Mister Ward," Garner said to him before he reached the door and when Ward turned around again, he saw a slightly suspicious look on the psychologist's face.

"Sure, doc," he replied with a tiny smile and a nod.

A moment later, the door opened and Skye stepped in. Together they left the office and it took only a few seconds before Skye started talking to him.

"I'm very happy you took this chance," she told him earnestly, shooting him a short glance from under her bangs. "I only realized in the last few days that I was wrong to just hate you, without asking for any reasons that might have explained your actions. Seeing you under the effects of the serum... it made me question things. And when Coulson asked me to dig up information about you, I slowly started to see the whole picture. You deserve a second chance, Ward. I just can't understand why you kept quiet about what happened to you for such a long time. It might've changed... things."

Ward swallowed heavily, forcing himself to meet her gaze.

"I wished you hadn't seen me like that," he replied honestly. "And I tried telling you about my past, remember? Didn't work out back then. You weren't ready to listen." He stopped himself because he realized his tone was turning bitter, which was why he added evenly, "Whatever, it doesn't matter. It's all in the past now."

Skye gave him another long look, before she said with a slight undertone of humor, "Oh, you have no idea. Andrew isn't going to let you off the hook that easily, you know?"

He ground his teeth, but smiled at her anyway.

They had reached the stairs that led down to the lab, when Ward suddenly halted.

"I need to fetch something from my bunk first," he told her.

Skye raised her eyebrows, then asked him, "Yeah? I didn't notice you storing much personal stuff in your bunk. Don't tell me Super Spy wants to stall the procedure because he is afraid of needles."

"Well, I still need to make a stop at my bunk," he told her with a small smile. "You'll just have to wait and see."

"Okay," she finally acquiesced, but still gave him a quizzical look.

When they reached his bunk, he opened the door, then motioned for her to step in first.

"After you," he told her grandly, which earned him a smile.

"Always the gentleman," Skye commented as she stepped into the room. "If I had known that before..."

The rest was lost, because as soon as she had turned her back to him, Ward lunged for the ICEr she had stuffed into the back of her pants. The look of shock on her face – eyes wide and mouth open for a scream – lasted only for a second, before he pulled the trigger. The round hit her side and a few seconds later, her face and whole body went slack.

He easily caught her as she slumped against him and he carried her over to his bed. Her warm body felt good against his, but he forbid himself to touch her a moment longer than was necessary. Everything else would have been just wrong.

"I'm sorry," he whispered to her as he laid her out on the mattress, arranging the pillow carefully under her head. "You'll be mightily pissed at me when you wake up. But I can't do this. Not yet. Not now. Not like this. I'm sorry."

He brushed a fleeting kiss onto her forehead, then he turned around, stuffed the ICEr into the back of his pants and left the room.

It was not like he had spent his time on the Playground completely idle. He knew that there were only two exits he could take to leave the building and he knew he had to use the one that was lesser frequented than the main entrance in the hangar. Luckily enough, he encountered no one in the hallway and he was able to make his way swiftly to the door at the end of a long and deserted corridor. Without hesitation, he reached for the handle only to find the door locked.

"Fuck," he whispered to himself and only then noticed the small and unobtrusive keypad to the left of the door. He would need a code to get out. Damn it. He had reckoned to need a code to get inside, but he had not thought about the possibility to need one to get out.

His luck seemed to have run out, because he heard soft footsteps in the corridor behind him. With a sigh of resignation, he turned around. Only to come face to face with Kara.

"It's 5283," she told him quietly and without a greeting. "The code for opening the door."

Ward raised an eyebrow at that. For one moment, he was tempted to just enter the numbers and be gone from here without another word, but then he decided against it.

"Why telling me that?" he asked her, cocking his head slightly to the side.

"A peace offering?" she replied and gave him a sad smile. "A service of a good friend? Giving you a choice even though you never gave me one when you left me here? Take your pick."

He winced slightly at that. "I always did what I thought was best for you, Kara."

"Yeah, so did I," she answered quietly. "I'm sad to see that your way to a better life is obviously not my way to a better life or you wouldn't be sneaking out of here like a thief in the night."

"I can't stay," Ward tried to explain. "It's all a bit too much. Coulson offered me to work for him again. He also wants a shrink to pick my brain. I can't do that right now, Kara."

"Why not?" Kara asked, studying him with sad eyes.

He heaved a sigh, then tried to explain, "If I stay here, it'll be exactly the way it was with Garrett. The serum tore me down and now Coulson is ready to build me up again, the way he wants me to be. He wants to tag me, Kara, so he'll be able to trace my every step. And you know what? Something in me rejoices at the idea to have someone around who tells me what to do, where to go, when to kill people, when to spare lives. It'd be Garrett all over again. I can't let that happen. I need to sort things out first and I better do this far away from Coulson and the team. After that, maybe I can think about joining forces with them again. But not now. I feel too... vulnerable right now. There's no trust left, on either side."

And there was this feeling in his chest that told him to get away from here, to run. He was not ready to be met with scorn whenever he passed a member of his old team on the hallway. Yeah, Skye had started to warm up to him again. But what about Fitz? May? And Simmons? Maybe he was a coward, running away from his problems. Maybe he was just human and the notion of so many people hating him made it impossible for him to stay.

"I trust you, Grant" Kara replied evenly. "With my life."

Ward heaved a small sigh, then reached out a hand to touch her shoulder. "Thank you. This means a lot to me."

"So this is it?" she prompted, lips trembling slightly until she bit down on them. "Our goodbye?"

"Not forever," he answered, evenly meeting her eyes. "Just for now. You still got my number, the one I gave you in secret. I'll be there for you, if you need me." He hesitated, then finally added slowly, "I won't be responding to any of S.H.I.E.L.D. calls in the near future. But if there's a real emergency and one of Coulson's people is in danger, let me know, alright?"

"Okay," she whispered, then moved in to hug him. Ward held her tightly and pressed a kiss onto the top of her hair.

"Go," she finally told him and started to disentangle herself from his arms. "I'll keep watch for a few minutes, to make sure you get a head start."

"Thank you, Kara," he replied, then started to type in the code she had given him earlier on. The door swung open.

Without looking back, he left the Playground and S.H.I.E.L.D. behind him.

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-The End-

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Thoughts? Happy with how the story ended? Unhappy? I'd love to hear your opinion.