**A/N: Here we are! Part 3 :)

To everyone who just clicked on this story; yes, this is a three-part story thusfar. And yeah, you can try and start with this story, but it probably won't make much sense. The other stories are long, but at least you'll have something to keep you busy? A bonus for actually starting my stories is that I do update every single week. I'm dedicated and will not abandon my story at the peak of battle. I probably won't abandon my story unless everyone is happy.

To everyone who is returning; WELCOME. As you'll notice, this story begins the same as the other two. With a flashforward. Which means you get a little sneak peak into Bethany and Steve's lives during the Age of Ultron plot. While it'll be a while until I actually begin to write that, there is a lot of my own plot to develop in the meantime.

Also, for everyone who loves Bucky, I'm happy to report that we will be seeing him quite often in this story. The entire first part of Broken Strings will continually feature him, as well as Kiley, as they embark across Europe to try and find Bucky's past.

The entire Jen/Jacob debacle will come to a close before the events of Age of Ultron and that's a promise.

Chapter 1- Made to Be Broken

"I don't want the world to see me, 'cause I don't think that they'd understand. When everything's made to be broken, I just want you to know who I am."

~ Iris, Goo Goo Dolls

The room was eerily quiet. The only sound besides the whispers of their breath was the ceiling fan, a rhythmic whoosh, whoosh filling their ears. Steve and Bethany had barely said two words to each other since they decided that Jamie would sleep in between them, safe from any harm. This situation wasn't like the others. They couldn't rely on the top of line security system, and the first line of defense. They couldn't rely on someone to alert them if anything was out of the ordinary. JARVIS was gone. And along with him, any semblance of security that the couple had built through those past few months. The Tower still stood tall and strong, and despite being one of, if not the safest building in the world without the Intelligence, it didn't change the uneasiness they were both suffering. But that wasn't the only thing on their minds.

"Are you asleep?" Bethany finally asked, turning her head to look at her husband. It was a moment before he finally responded. "Are you mad?" Was her next question. She had already asked him this before, but after the team meeting, she needed reassurance. His silence said a lot to her, and he had barely said anything.

"No," Steve said with a sigh. "I'm… I'm disappointed."

"That we did it? Or that we didn't tell you? Or because I didn't tell you?" Bethany asked, a heavy weight pressing against her soul, knowing that Steve was disappointed at their actions. At her actions.

"Everything," Steve whispered. "Beth, why didn't you say something?"
"Because we knew… I knew that you wouldn't agree," Bethany admitted freely. "We didn't have time to debate this. We did it because we knew this would be our only chance."

Steve was silent, quietly processing this information. "So even though you knew I wouldn't approve, you still went ahead and did it anyways?" He had understood earlier, or so he said. But now wasn't about just calming her down and getting to the bottom of the issue. Now was about understanding every little aspect.

"Just because you're a righteous man, Steve, doesn't mean you're always right," She pointed out. "You heard what Tony said. We need this."

"But in the process, we created an even bigger problem at hand."

"Yes, but if it worked… Steve, imagine if it worked. If Ultron woke up and immediately went to work on keeping peace. On transforming the world into one that we would actually be proud to raise Jamie in."

"But that's not what happened."

"But that's why I did this. Why we all did this. You may be content spending the rest of your days in that damned suit, but that's not all there is to life. Okay? When I agreed to help, all I could see was our dream. The one where it's us, growing old, with our children in a big, beautiful house and the last thing on our minds is the dangers of the world. Do you remember that dream Steve? What happened to that dream?"

"It's… unrealistic," Steve whispered. "I don't know if we can get that."

Bethany's jaw clenched as she tried to keep back her own disappointment at Steve's words. Because despite the world they lived in now, getting worse by the minute opposed to their attempts to make it better, that dream was the only reason she continued to push forward. And she thought that was the reason Steve was fighting as well. "You don't know if we can get it, or you don't want that?"

"What does that mean?" Steve asked, hurt by her words. "Of course I want a home, a real home with you and Jamie. But I also know that with HYDRA, no SHIELD and everything that happened with Jen and Theo this year, not to mention you, Banner and Tony keeping secrets-"

"Don't spin this on us," Bethany snapped. "Steve, I don't really know anymore if you would be okay with settling down. In theory, you think it's nice, but you don't-"

"I want that," Steve promised. "I just… I'm tired of expecting something and getting my hopes up. I'd rather look at this realistically. Besides, I thought you were happy. I thought we'd finally found a balance between family and work."

"You know why I fight. You know why I've always fought. But that doesn't change the fact that I want Jamie to grow up without having to worry like we do. For him to live his own life, and not have to live in your impossibly big shadow. I want us to have more kids, and watch them grow up and be individuals, contributing to society."

"Everytime you say you're going to hang up the suit," Steve began, clearly growing frustrated with their conversation. "You put it back on. Every single time. So, I'm sorry if I don't necessarily believe you when you say that you'd give it up permanently."

"Well, neither would you," Bethany spat in return.

"Does that mean you'll help us?" Steve asked. "You'll go after Ultron with us? I'm not going to ask you to stay here if you need to go out there. We've prepared for this. Prepared to leave Jamie here while we right the wrongs, but only if you're doing it for the right reasons."

"I just told you why I'm fighting," Bethany reminded him, but then realizing that she hadn't exactly laid it out clearly. "Look, I made a mistake. I always make mistakes. And not ones that only affect myself. They affect others, they hurt others. This is possibly the biggest mistake I've ever made. I'll take full responsibility for my bad judgement."

"Well, that's good to hear," Steve replied, reaching across Jamie and taking Bethany's hand.

"I need to right my wrong," Bethany continued.

"And then? When this is all over? What do we do from then?" Bethany looked at Steve, her eyes long ago adjusting to the darkness. She could see the worry etched into his face on what was about to happen. For the first time, she could see the weariness taking its toll, but he didn't, for a second, allow that to take control of him.

She knew that Steve loved Jamie. That Steve loved her. God, he loved her. And she loved both her boys in return. But she knew who she married. She knew who Steve was. She knew who she was. They were both fighters. And he was ultimately right. As much as she wanted to be solely a mother and a wife, she knew she couldn't when the rest of her family was out there, fighting the fight that needed to be fought. If Steve put down the shield for good, giving up fighting would be a hell of a lot easier for her. That was the only reason she was able to stay away from the hells of the world right before and after Jamie was born. But all that was changing.

She wasn't sure if they could achieve that normalness they once wanted. That normalness that once seemed so simple. And when SHIELD was still around, it did seem possible. But now, Bethany couldn't disagree with her husband. It didn't mean that she didn't want to raise a family, and actually live their lives together. She wanted that. And she knew that Steve wanted that. But they would never stop fighting. That seemed to be the real issue at hand. No matter how badly she wanted to end it, she knew Steve would never step away, and therefore, she wouldn't either.

"Beth?" Steve asked again. "What happens when this is all over?"

She let out a soft sigh, squeezing his hand. "I don't know. But I do hope we can untangle ourselves from the strings that are weighing us down. The ones that keep bringing us here. The ones that keep us from moving forward. I'm tired, Steve. I'm tired of fighting. I'm tired of worrying."

"We'll get through this," Steve promised. "We always do."

"Until we don't," Bethany pointed out with a whisper. "What if this time we don't? What if this time, we lose someone?"

Steve sat up, Bethany following him. He quickly brought her into his arms, kissing her temple. She instantly felt better, comforted by his embrace. "We'll get through that too," he vowed. "I'm sorry that this is our life. You deserve better."

"Shhh," Bethany replied, her hands rubbing his smooth back rhythmically. "What I have now? This is more than I ever thought I would get. And I'm grateful. Living on the edge used to be fun. Now, it's a full time job. But I'm grateful for you. For Jamie. For the life we have together, no matter what. But that won't stop me from wanting us to just live happily ever after."

"We'll get through this," Steve repeated, as if unsure of what else to say. "We always do." Bethany nodded softly, pressing a kiss to his neck. She knew if she said anything else, Steve would be able to tell that she wasn't exactly sure if they would.

Five and a half months earlier...

Steve carefully opened the door to Bethany's hospital room, balancing a tray of mac and cheese in one hand and his phone in the other. He had yet another text message from Jackson. They had reached an understanding. Steve wanted to be with Theo and Jamie, both of whom were only suffering more as the days went on, but right now, it wasn't possible. Jackson was sending him hourly updates, and while they only made the situation harder for Steve, ironically, there was less guilt because at least he was invested.

He quietly moved next to Bethany's bed. It had been a week since the explosion, and while she had been awake for the last few days, there were still burns on her body. She was frustrated with being confined to the bed, but due to Steve's continual begging paired with an untameable exhaustion, Bethany hadn't left the room. Putting the tray on the bedside table, Steve sat beside his wife and carefully touched her sleeping face.

"Beth," he whispered. Typically, he would let her sleep. But it had been hours since she last ate and he wanted to see if she had made any progress.

Her eyelashes fluttered open, smiling when she saw him. "Hey Handsome."

"Hi Beautiful," he smiled, taking her hand and giving it a squeeze. "You hungry?"

"Yeah," Bethany nodded, sitting up, wincing slightly.

"What? Do you feel pain?" Steve asked, a little excited and silently cursing himself.

"No," Bethany promised. "Just a little stiff from being in this damn bed."

"Oh. Well, they said they'll let you leave tomorrow," he explained, handing her the tray of food. He watched as she began her lunch, thinking back to everything that had happened that past week.

As soon as Bethany opened her eyes and smiled at him, Steve felt the broken pieces of his soul stitch themselves back together. He felt whole again and felt like everything would be okay. His entire world was shattered once again, however, when the first thing Bethany asked when she was allowed to talk was where Loki was.

"Wha-What do you mean?" Steve asked, sitting down next to her as the doctors left the room. "Beth, he's dead. Or-or did you see him before the explosion?"

"Explosion?" Bethany questioned, brows furrowed. "What explosion? I thought I was hit over the head."

Steve could see the confusion in her eyes, knowing that his hopes of everything working out were premature. "What's the last thing you remember, Beth?"

"Being in Stuttgart," she replied immediately, her voice still a little hoarse from the breathing tube, but showing no indication that she was in any pain. "Under Loki's… influence." Steve let out a heartbreaking sigh, this alone giving Bethany enough information to know that time had passed. "Your hair… and clothes… Steve? What year is it?"

"It's… it's 2014, Beth," he told her quietly, watching as she registered this. At first, she looked horrified, but the emotion was fleeting. The entire demeanour was dropped and she looked like she was at a business meeting, or mission briefing. She looked indifferent.

"How did I get here?" She asked, her voice strong, as if trying to piece together her forgotten path.

"There was an explosion at Jen's apartment," Steve explained carefully. He tried to hold back all the pain he felt in that moment. Bucky had forgotten his life with Steve. Peggy was forgetting that life as well. Everyone else he knew from his past was gone. And while Bethany remembered the war and their life together then, she forgot the years that meant the most to Steve—their marriage and the birth of their son.

"Are they okay?"

"Jen… Jen's out of the country. Theo has been staying with us. Well, right now he's staying with Tony. He's a little banged up, but he's doing okay physically."

"Not… not emotionally?" Bethany asked, confused.

"He saw you," Steve whispered. "You… you weren't exactly breathing when you were brought out of the building. Your burns were pretty serious. It-it kind of frightened him. And rightfully so."

Bethany looked down to her arm where it was covered in bandages. Steve said nothing as she began to tear them off, looking at the healing marks on her skin. "Why didn't I heal right away? Why aren't these healed?"

"A lot has happened over the last two years," Steve began slowly, watching as she carefully poked her skin, but made no sign towards being in pain. "We were trying to start our life together, and you-you wanted to age with me. You wanted to grow old with me and with your kids. Our kids. In order to start the aging, we had to stop the healing."

"Is it permanent?" Bethany asked next.

"It's supposed to wear off if you don't continually take the injection," Steve explained. "And it seems to be true, it's just taking a little longer than anyone expected."

"It doesn't hurt," Bethany told him, looking up at him. "There's no pain. Is that normal?"

"No," Steve admitted, frowning. "No, that's not. Maybe you'll feel again when you heal completely."

"Yeah. Maybe," Bethany whispered, balling up the bandages and throwing them across the room. Steve watched as the perfect arch fell into the waste bin in the corner. "What else should I know? About the last two years?"

Steve opened his mouth, but struggled. "Let's just focus on you getting better, okay? Your memories will come back and then I won't have to tell you." He took both of her hands and gave them a loving squeeze. "Just worry about you right now, okay? Everyone is outside, waiting to hear how you are, but if you're not ready-"

"Is that a ring?" Bethany asked carefully, her eyes focused on the wedding band on Steve's finger. She slowly pulled her hands away from his, another round of panic flooding through her body. Steve panicked. In no circumstance had he wanted to tell Bethany, this Bethany that they were married for this exact reason. She may have accepted his proposal without batting her eyes, but the Bethany sitting in front of him… she hadn't even said that she loved him yet. It was a huge step.

"Beth-"

"I don't want to know," She said immediately, looking up at him. "Either way-"

"Either way?" Steve asked confused. "Wait? You mean… You think I'd marry someone other than you? No, Beth, of course it's you. I know this is all… confusing and overwhelming, but it's been two years. A lot has changed. We've gone through a lot. And yeah, we got married. And it was beautiful."

Despite trying to calm her down, Bethany only looked more worried. "Beth, I'm not expecting you to be anyone who you aren't," he promised her quickly. "I'm not going to push you into being a wife. I know how much you value your freedom."

"Being married doesn't mean I'm not free," Bethany spoke assuredly, alarming Steve. He hadn't been expecting that in the least. "I just- I haven't said…"

"Well, you have," Steve said with a soft smile. "You just don't remember."

"That doesn't make it any easier saying it now," Bethany pointed out.

"I know," Steve promised. "Doll, I just want you to get better. Physically and mentally. One step at a time. You can ask questions, but you need to be prepared for not liking the answer."

"If you don't think I'm not going to like it, don't tell me," Bethany requested. "It may drive me crazy, wanting to know, but right now… Right now I guess I'm just happy that Loki is dead and presumably the world isn't complete shit?"

"It still needs work," Steve nodded, remembering just how much this Bethany swore. "But a lot has happened in two years."

"Give it a week," Bethany suggested. "If I don't remember things by then, then tell me. A week of ignorance might do me some good. And I promise I'll listen to you. Eat, sleep, rest. No work, no nothing."

"I'm just happy you're awake," Steve confessed, moving in to kiss her forehead. "I was terrified I had lost you. The one person in this entire world I'm not supposed to lose, and we've called it close too many times."

"Well, I'm here," Bethany reminded him with a small smile. "I may not be in the best shape, but I feel good. And… I'm happy."

"I sense a but…" Steve teased.

"Your hair," Bethany explained, lifting a hand up to touch the blonde. "It's… different."

"You don't like it?" Steve asked confused. The Other Bethany had loved it because of what it stood for; moving on.

"It'll take some getting used to," Bethany replied, leaning her head back into her pillow. "It makes you look different. Before you were this sweet innocent soul. A real gentleman. Now it's… well, frankly, sexy-as-hell."

Steve couldn't help but chuckle, feeling every muscle in his body relax for a moment. "I was so afraid I had lost you. And to have you now, in no pain and making jokes? God, I love you."

Bethany gave a closed-mouth smile while her eyelashes fluttered shut. "And I adore you."

A week was quickly sneaking up on them. Steve wasn't ready to tell Bethany about the last two years. Tell her about the heartbreak of SHIELD falling would probably be the hardest on her. But he also knew the entire Bucky ordeal, paired with the knowledge that the Winter Soldier most likely killed her brother… it would be a real toss-up. He figured the truth about Jamie wouldn't be the worst news she received. In fact, he was hoping it would be the best.

"We'll be staying at a hotel," Steve spoke, watching as she happily ate her food. "Just until you get your memories back, or I tell you everything. There's a lot of memories in our apartment."

"Good ones?" Bethany asked curiously.

"Yeah, but just as many bad ones," Steve admitted. "I wish that wasn't the case, but-"

"It's us," Bethany interrupted. "We always find a way to butt heads."

"And then make up," Steve pointed out with a smirk.

"Mmm," Bethany hummed, closing her eyes for a moment. "I don't care how long it's been for this body, my mind is telling me seventy years."

"Listen," Steve began quickly, knowing Bethany well and wanting to steer them out of trouble. The last thing they needed was a nurse walking in on them having sex. Especially since Bethany had been off the birth control since she was in the hospital and they would be starting from scratch. "Tony will be here soon to keep you company. I have to do some things. Some errands. Get food and clothes for the hotel. I won't be gone long."

"Take your time," Bethany assured. "I'm a big girl. I can take care of myself."

"See, I don't doubt that, but here we are. With you in a hospital bed," he pointed out. "I'll be back before visiting hours are up."

"And spend another night on the cot?" Bethany asked, her nose cringed with disgust. "Steve, just crawl into bed with me. I like sleeping with you. Even if it's just in your arms. Maybe it'll fight off the nightmares.

Steve studied her for a moment, weighing his options. She had yet to get a night of no nightmares. It was always a mix of things, and even sometimes she would wake up terrified but completely forget from what. But what unsettled her the most was the dreams of Loki that had seemed to be thrust at her on full force. To her mind, she hadn't gotten the closure she had with the last two years.

"Alright," he finally allowed. "But only because I love you as much as I do."

"I know, I know," Bethany teased with an adorable smile. "I feel so young again. With you here. So carefree. I have this dark past tied around me, but whenever you're in the room… I feel so much better. Was I? Before the explosion?"

"You were," Steve promised. "You stopped letting your past dictate your future. You let yourself be happy and believe you deserved it."

"Sounds nice," Bethany confessed.

"You'll get there," Steve assured.

"I don't get it," Bethany spoke with some skepticism. "You seem… upbeat. Chipper, even. I can't remember our marriage."

Steve leaned back in his chair, giving her a smile. "Doll Face, I'm just happy you're awake. We've been through more than lost memories." His words were the truth. While there was a heavy weight on her not remembering Jamie, of all things, the possibility of her mind never healing, and more importantly, having to eventually tell her, he kept reminding himself that at least she was there. At least she was awake. He hadn't lost her like he thought he would. She was there, right in front of him, living. And for now, that was more than enough.

Kiley was bored out of her mind. The only source of entertainment she had at the moment was her forefinger pulling down her lower lip and letting it slip out, making a soft pop sound. While it felt like Bucky had left their tent hours ago, it had only been minutes. She was regretting this decision.

Not that she hated camping. She loved it. As a child, she would always set up a tent in the backyard with her friends when the weather was nice enough, and always treasured the rare times her family actually packed up the truck and went deep into the forests. But then, it wasn't like now. Her father would build the fire and there were kids around the camp to play with. Her mother would cook food that they brought from home and there was always marshmallows. Camping with Bucky didn't contain any of that.

Well, they did have a fire. That was the first thing Bucky did when they picked a spot. But other than that, they were failing. The camping spot was only temporary. Bucky remembered forests, or at the very least, trees, and even though he wasn't sure where the memory spiked, he was hoping the surroundings would reignite some sort of memory. Kiley, however, could do nothing more than play with her lips, trying to get the rhythm of the Jeopardy theme.

Hearing a rustle from outside, she sat up and waited as Bucky crawled back into the tent. "Anything?"

"Quick flashes," Bucky nodded, settling on the ground across from her. "But I don't know from when and just as soon as they come, they flee."

"Ugh, I get dreams like that," Kiley sympathized. "Couldn't imagine how much that would suck, being your life and all. What do you want to do next?"

"Germany?" He suggested. "I know I want to go to Italy and Russia, too."

"Are you trying to remember who you were before the fall, or who you became?" Kiley questioned carefully. "Or are you just hoping you'll remember something in general."

"As much as I don't want to remember my time with HYDRA, I need to know what they did to me. I need to understand."

"You'll probably not like the answers," Kiley pointed out.

"No, but revenge won't help me," Bucky spoke softly. "I had the chance to kill one of them, and I hesitated. The world would be so much better without him. Without them all. But I just let him go."

"Because you're not a killer," Kiley said strongly. "You're a good man. You saved Theo and Bethany. If you weren't there, weren't brave enough… you didn't even hesitate to go in, did you? The apartment could have been empty. It had been over the weeks. You saved your best friend's wife, and you didn't even know she was in there. You're a hero."

She could tell that he didn't agree, but she figured that the more she assured him of this, then one day he'd accept it as fact. Even if this plan of hers failed, there was no harm. "Quick question," she began suddenly. "Will we be camping in Germany?"

"I figured we should have our money," Bucky explained. "Your money."

"There's lots," Kiley promised. "And when we run out, we'll make our own money. I've always wanted to live on the edge, you know. Working for the Avengers, and Bethany in particular these last months, hearing all of their adventures? I got jealous. I wanted one of my own. To look back one day and be proud that I did something dangerous."

"You don't regret this, then?" Bucky asked carefully.

Kiley stalled for a moment. "I'm a little bored," She admitted with a chuckle. "But that's 'cause there's nothing to do. What is your plan exactly? Just wander around Germany?"

Bucky took something out of his heavy jacket and passed it over to Kiley. It was a pamphlet from the Smithsonian highlighting all the raids that Captain America and his team of Howling Commandos conquered during the war. "Figured this was a good place to start. Going to these locations. Ask some questions and do some investigating. Try and find some answers. Anything, at this point."

"Like Sherlock and Watson?" Kiley asked, growing excited. "That would be so much more enjoyable than camping. Not that camping isn't fun but-"

"It's boring," Bucky concluded. "Come out. We'll go exploring. See some animals. But make sure you bundle up. It's getting cold, quickly."

"Okay," Kiley nodded, pulling on a heavy winter coat. "Should we go back into town tonight? Since it'll probably be freezing?"

"Nah, if it gets too cold, we'll just take our clothes off," Bucky said seriously. Kiley froze, not knowing whether he was serious or not, watching as a smile slowly moved across his face and he started laughing. "Is the idea really that bad?"

"It was sudden," Kiley chuckled, zipping up the jacket and pulling on her boots.

"Skin on skin creates heat," Bucky reminded her.

"Well, I know that. But it's never innocent," Kiley explained, not making eye contact. She couldn't bring herself to look at his eyes right now. There was a new emotion in them she had yet to see in person, but had seen many times in the black and white photos in Jamie's nursery.

"It was for Bethany and Steve," Bucky said without thinking, Kiley looking up as his eyes had a glaze over them for a moment.

"Another memory?" Kiley asked, hopefully.

"I-I didn't even remember it until I did. If that makes sense," he whispered.

"Subconsciously you remember," Kiley began. "Like when you saved Steve from the Potomac. You didn't fully remember him, but you remembered something. It was buried in your subconscious. Tell me more. About the memory. Maybe it'll spark another."

"Umm…" Bucky started, digging deep. His brow was furrowed with concentration, as if his life depended on this. "She was cold. I don't know where we were or why she was so cold, but Steve tried to warm her up. So they took their clothes off. She laid there in his arms all night, basking in his heat. Nothing more happened. It was only a little time afterwards that they spent the night together, but for real."

"It must have been mind boggling, someone like Steve readily giving into sex," Kiley continued, trying to keep the conversation flowing, hoping that more memories would surface.

"He loved her. He still does," Bucky whispered. "He'd do basically anything she'd ask him. Although, I think he was afraid they wouldn't get their chance again if he passed it up. Bethany's reputation was well known, despite her being fairly conservative at that particular time. She wanted to be a better person. For him."

"That's nice," Kiley commented. "Having a love like that. Wanting to be a better person, not only wanting to do something for the other person, but being able to do it. People are selfish now. It's hard to do something for someone else without expecting anything in return."

"You're here. Now, with me," Bucky reminded her. "That's selfless."

"No, I wanted to be here. Not just for you, but for me," Kiley added. "And it's different in a lot of circumstances. We're not Bethany and Steve. We're not head over heels in love."

"No, but that's definitely the end goal, isn't it?" Bucky asked, eliciting a confused expression from Kiley. "To find love like that. Someone who makes you want to be the best version of yourself, and more than that, you can actually be that person for them."

Kiley nodded softly, watching as Bucky exited the tent, holding the flap open for her to crawl out. She had to agree. Whether someone wanted marriage and kids, people couldn't deny the need to have someone, especially someone who made them a better person. It was a psychological need to have someone else. Love could very well be a myth, but this Kiley knew as a fact.

She didn't really know what the best version of herself was. She did know that there were two sides of her. The work savvy and professional one and the laid back girl from the country who had an unhealthy obsession with tea. She wasn't sure which side was better, but she was definitely curious.

A quick and fleeting voice reminded her that there was only person who had been able to pull out the latter personality, and that was Bucky.

Arriving back at the Tower, Steve spent a moment surveying the room from the elevator. For the most part, the apartment was clean, but that was the last of Steve's concerns. It felt foreign, and he wondered whether that was because Bethany wasn't there or because some other reason all together. He could hear Jamie crying from his nursery so he decided he would do that first. Then talk to Theo. Then shower. And then sleep.

He had been showering and sleeping at the hospital. Natasha brought him a duffel with his necessities and he had been living from only the bag for the past week. The only time he left Bethany's room or the area surrounding it was when he was getting them food. Food, Steve thought as he made his way to the nursery. While he was at the Tower, he might as well eat something. Bethany could stand the hospital food, but he was getting tired of it. He was in the mood for pancakes, and while Bethany made the best pancakes in the world, he would settle for his mediocre batch.

"Hey," Steve spoke, startling a frazzled Jackson who looked instantly relieved to see the soldier. His hair was standing up straight and his eyes were heavily bagged with lack of sleep. It only made Steve feel even worse.

"Someone missed you," he grumbled, Steve accepting his son immediately and rocking him.

"I'll be here for a few hours," Steve promised. "Go ahead and get some rest. Look, I owe you big time."

"It's my job," Jackson reminded him, but stretching out his back. "But I'll definitely take those promised few hours to sleep."

"Of course," Steve nodded, watching as the nanny left. Steve continued to rock Jamie, hearing a faintness of Bethany's singing from the recording he gave Jackson. "I'll have to get her to sing a new one," he spoke out loud, mostly to himself however.

Steve watched as Jamie began to calm down as soon as he saw that he was in his father's arms. It physically pained him, as a lot was doing lately, to know that Jamie was aware of when his parents weren't around. He always assumed that Bethany held him a certain way, or it was some odd mother-son bonding factor which explained Jamie's almost instant settling down on usual occasions. But Jamie seemed to know who his parents were and had created real feelings. He didn't know if this was normal for a baby, or if his son was just a genius. Although Steve had a feeling it was both.

"I'm here," Steve promised Jamie, kissing his head lightly. "I'm here little man." His little wet face pushed up against Steve's neck, his lips gracing against his father's skin lightly. He stroked Jamie's head, not stopping from his light bouncing until Jamie's hiccups from his crying calmed down and his breathing was back to normal.

Looking down to his shirt, he saw that Jamie had a handful of it in his fist, yet with each moment, his grip loosened, signaling that he was falling asleep. With one thing on his to do list completed, he decided to tackle the second task.

"Theo?' Steve called out when he left Jamie's room. He got no response in return, but he noted that the kid's bedroom door was closed. Jackson had warned Steve that Theo hadn't been faring well, but Steve assumed that once he returned, he'd be able to assure Theo of Bethany's recovery. "Theo?" He asked again after popping a head into Theo's room.

"I'm busy," the kid whispered, slowly playing with two of his action figures.

"Can we just talk for a moment?" Steve asked. "I wanted to apologize for not being here."

"You had to be with Bethany," Theo replied softly. Steve let out a deep breath, happy that the kid understood where Steve was and why he was there. "She needed you."

"Yeah, but you needed me too. And so did Jamie," Steve explained. "I shouldn't have picked Bethany over you two. I should have split my time fairly. And I'm sorry about that. She's doing good though. You'll be able to see her soon."

"I don't want too," Theo whispered.

Steve flinched at his words before quickly recovering and moving to sit next to Theo carefully, making sure not to jostle Jamie from his sleep. "Why not?"

"'Cause she's scary," Theo cried quietly.

"Wha-" Steve began before realization hit him. "Theo, because of her burns?" Theo said nothing, his eyes focused on the action figure in his hand, but his head nodded slightly. Steve couldn't blame the kid. Everytime he closed his eye, he could see his wife's charred skin, peeling and bleeding. It was a terrifying sight.

"The burns are almost gone," Steve promised. "And she doesn't feel any of the pain. Soon she'll be as good as new. Okay? But listen, Theo. Bethany lost some of her memories."

"How many?" Theo asked, finally looking up to Steve. His eyes were watering, and Steve could tell that the kid was exhausted as if sleep hadn't been his friend in months.

"A lot," Steve admitted. "She doesn't remember anything after the Battle of New York."

"She doesn't remember Jamie?" Theo asked slowly.

"No, she doesn't," Steve replied, looking down to the sleeping baby. "But she does remember you. So when she comes back, you need to make sure that you're a strong little kid for her. Okay?"

"Okay," Theo agreed.

"And Theo? You know you can talk to me, right? I don't want you to be afraid of Bethany. Or what happened. You're safe now. This entire ordeal has only made us see that we need to start taking the threats more seriously again. When Jamie was born, we all took a break and it's lasted a little too long. But I promise you that you're safe, okay?"

Theo nodded, saying nothing else, but turning back to his game. Steve let out a soft sigh, deciding that for the day, this was the best he could do. But he would need to go and try again until Theo returned to the fun-loving adorable kid that he had grown to love and accept as a son.

Steve's was quickly realizing how many people he needed to help return to a state where they were happy. Bucky was caught between two lives he didn't understand. Bethany had reverted to someone who still needed growth. And Theo, a kid who was full of love and innocence, was now terrified of someone he had once respected and loved. And Steve couldn't help but notice a familiar pattern. All of these people had one person to blame; HYDRA.

When Steve said that they weren't going to sit back and watch any longer, he knew this was fact. They had to suit up and go out and take down the enemy. Staying home with the family wasn't keeping them safe, as proven. If anything, they were being torn apart. HYDRA had taken almost everything from Steve and planned on taking more. They brought out the very worst of Steve's emotions. Pure anger and hatred bubbled through his veins, thinking about everything they had ever done. It was like they had a personal vendetta with the soldier, and it was time Steve fought back. It was time Steve won.

**A/N: The picture for this story, after much debate, is simply Bethany holding balloon strings. I thought it was symbolic and shit. I could be wrong. I probably am.