Hello everyone! This is my second story, my first Jax. Inspiration struck one night when I couldn't sleep, so I figured I'd get to writing :) This story is gonna have its ups and downs, but it's going to be a bit darker and dramatic than my other story. It mainly follows the story line of the show, but somethings are changed, and those'll be explained throughout the chapters. Also, it's rated M for language and later chapters. Let me know what you think, good or bad! Enjoy :)

Chapter 1

Wake Up Call

Jax POV

I woke up in the hospital with the biggest fucking headache of my life. What the actual fuck? A fucking semi truck couldn't fucking kill me?! I wanted to be dead. I wasn't good for anybody anymore. My boys deserved better, so did my club. Wendy, Nero. Everyone. My wife was dead. My mother who killed her was dead. My dad was dead. My step-dad who killed him was dead. My best friend was dead. My little brother was long gone. What the fuck else did I have? I wasn't gonna go back to the club, and even if they found out I was alive... Would they take me back or go through with Mayhem? Fuck.

My left leg was elevated and in a huge, white cast. My right wrist was stuck in the plaster, too. Slowly, I felt my face. I had cuts all over. Even slower, I touched my head and felt the bandages. A sudden feeling of nauseousness hit me like the fucking semi. I tried to get up, but went right back down on the bed when I got dizzy and weak. Fuck, I must've lost a shit load of blood.

I grabbed the bed pan and puked this nasty yellowish green shit up. It hurt, tasted bad, and pissed me off. Why the hell couldn't I have died?! I'd be with Tara, maybe. Maybe Heaven was real. I'd be with her, then. Be with everyone I needed in my life.

The feeling of emptiness I got when I found Tara's bloody body came into my body again. I punched the uncomfortable hospital mattress and began to cry just as a bunch of heart monitors began beeping like crazy. Fuck this.

A few nurses stopped outside my door and shouted for some person named Scar. I was confused as to why none of them were helping me, until, finally, the mystery person stepped into my room.

She was a woman full of smiles. She had hazel eyes with this dyed, dark purpleish hair that was so dark you'd think it was brown in certain lighting. She continued to grin as she shut off the monitors.

"You doing okay, Jackson?" Her eyes were wide with concern. It kinda had me worried, too. "You went through a bad accident. Been out for almost three days now. Do you remember any of it?" Scar sat down in a chair that was near my bed. I eyed her when she tried to comfort me by touching my hand with her own.

I sat up a bit as I nodded. "Yeah, actually," I informed with a laugh. "I remember it all. Why aren't I handcuffed to this bed or somethin'? Weren't there cops chasing me?" My eyes were wide now. Well fuck, if I was alive, I didn't wanna spend my years in lock up.

Scar tilted her head before shaking it. "No, no cops," she laughed lightly. She stood up and rounded the bed to get to the foot of it to grab my chart. "Your brain could possibly be producing a scenario that didn't happen. It occurs sometimes in patients with severe head trauma. We'll have to monitor you for a while, but I think it'll go away in time." She smiled brightly again and, even though it killed me to think this when I was so close to being with Tara, she was beautiful.

She was beautiful in a nonconventional way, though. The way her hair fell out of her messy bun on top of her head and the way wearing no makeup looked great on her were getting to me. "So, uh, are you my doctor?" I wondered, wanting to get my mind off of her appearance.

After raising an eyebrow, Scar nodded while walking back to the chair. "That'd be me, Dr. Morrison," she sighed and crossed her legs. The scrubs even made her look nice. "I hate the whole last name thing, it feels so formal. I like to try and build a better relationship than that. Feel free to call me Dr. Scarlett, Dr. Scar, or just Scar. Whatever works for you." Scarlett. I liked that. That fit her.

"Morrison, huh? Like Jim?" I raised an eyebrow and hoped she'd get the reference. I felt like a tool with the whole still being alive thing, so I had to mask it somehow...

Scarlett chuckled loudly. Her laugh was annoying yet lovable at the same damn time. She caught her breath and replied, "No, no relation. I wish though!" After a few more laughs from the both of us, her face began to get serious. "Okay, Jackson, on a serious note, what were you doing out there? The way the truck hit, it looked intentional. I'm gonna need you to be honest with me. It'll make your treatment a lot easier on the both of us, trust me. I won't share this information with anyone you don't want me to." Her hand touched mine again, and I stared at it for a few moments, relishing in the comfort it actually did give me.

The way she was speaking to me made me feel like I was some dying kid who just got diagnosed with cancer. I didn't know if I should appreciate her being so careful with me, or be pissed off for the same reason. "It's just Jax, Scar," I smirked nonchalantly. She raised both her eyebrows quickly and smirked back before her face got professional again. "Yeah. I tried to kill myself. Got nothin' to live for, which you probably know." I looked at her suspiciously. I knew I was in St. Thomas from the looks of it, so she had to know about the club, about Tara, about me.

Surprisingly, she shook her head with a shrug. "Actually, Jax, I'm fairly new here. Didn't really get involved in all the town drama quite yet." Scar smirked once more and I had to look away. Having these thoughts about girls at Diosa was one thing, but another normal woman all together? Especially another doctor? How could I do that to Tara? "I'm gonna be treating you for a while, but you're gonna need to see a psychologist, as well. Procedure calls for it, no matter why you did what you did. I'll send one of the nurses in to test your memory, then explain where we're gonna go from here. We'll get you back to normal, sweetheart." She stood and patted my shoulder.

"Shit, I'll never be normal. Thanks, though, darlin'," I quietly said with a small nod. She returned the gesture and left me alone. Alone. Like I was always gonna be.

I dreamt of Tara that night. When those woke me up with tears, I fell back asleep only to get woken up by dreams of the semi hitting me again. Great. I was even more fucked up.

One of the dreams had me screaming. Scarlett rushed in with a concerned face. "Everything okay in here?!" She inquired bewilderedly. I knew it was only because she was my doctor, but her caring for me gave me a warm feeling inside. "Are you in pain?" Scar got close to me and I froze up. I didn't know what to do. "Anybody home?" She smiled, and I was brought back into the moment.

Quickly, I nodded. "Sorry, yeah, I'm fine," I stuttered hastily. "Just a bad dream. You're still here this late?" I raised an eyebrow at her hoping to change the subject. I didn't wanna discuss my shit.

She smiled sweetly again as she shrugged and told me, "Yeah, I am. I don't have anything else to do, and I love my patients, so I work." She took a seat next to my bed. "I'm one of those super weird crazy people who actually love their job." I noticed how tired she looked when she laughed a bit and touched the chain around her neck. I couldn't see what was at the end of the necklace, but it intrigued me, just like she did. There was something different about her. Something that made her so invested in what she did; something I wanted to find out about.

I laughed with her for a bit. "I used to love my job, too," I quietly admitted. I didn't even know if some people would call my fucked up way of earning a living a job, but it felt like one. "That was before, though." I let my gaze drift to my folded hands. It hurt to even think of the good times.

Scar cleared her throat and muttered, "Before you lost your wife?" My eyes shot to her with both surprise and a small amount of anger. "I'm sorry. After our talk earlier, I checked you out, Jax Teller. I'm a curious person. You went through some fucked up shit." I chuckled once as she shook her head. The curse words sounded so adorable coming out of her doctoral mouth.

"Have... Have you told anyone I'm alive?" I questioned with a gulp. I didn't want the club to find out yet. I didn't want Wendy or Nero knowing, either. I'd yet to think about what I was gonna do about the club, and even worse, I didn't know what I was gonna do about my boys.

Giving me a sympathetic smile, Scarlett shook her head. "The only thing the paper and news reported was that there was a bad accident, and that it was unclear if any deaths had occurred," she informed me in a soft voice. I let out a huge breath of relief. I had more time. "I'll deny it if you ever repeat this, but, I get why you did what you did."

Our eyes locked for a second, and I realized I couldn't read her. I couldn't tell if she was just trying to build that close relationship she talked about with me or if she was serious. I looked away before closing my eyes. "I doubt that," I whispered back, almost inaudibly.

When my eyes opened again I could see Scarlett was taken aback by my response at first. She quickly straightened herself out and said, "You wanted to give everyone a fresh start. Your kids, your motorcycle club, your friends... You wanted them to move on from you." The soft voice she'd used just a few minutes before was replaced by this hard, clean tone that made me see her in yet another new light. Her smile was gone; her face was nothing but truthful. "You wanted to let everyone start over. Everyone but yourself."

My eyes widened slightly at her bluntness. She had me pegged. "It was my only way out. I had to get away... Let everybody live without me," I pathetically replied. Saying all of this out loud made me feel like a piece of shit. I'd tried to leave so many people behind without even thinking of how they'd see it. My brothers knew it was what I wanted and needed, so they didn't dare try to stop me, no matter how upset it made them. Nero was hurt, but understood. Wendy didn't really know, and all the boys would be told was that their daddy had to go away. What the fuck was wrong with me?

I let my small tears turn into sobs, something I hadn't let happen since I found Tara. I didn't even cry this hard when I killed Gemma. Scarlett grabbed my hand in both of hers and attempted to hush me. "It's gonna be okay, Jax. You're gonna be able to fix this all somehow. You're gonna be alright." Her voice was soft again, and it was comforting. It reminded me of both my wife and mother, which was a dangerous combination. "I'm gonna help you through this. I promise."

Scarlett POV

The morning after my very personal talk with my newest patient I was a complete mess. I got home around four in the morning and was up until about six. Having to be up again by nine, it wasn't my best of nights. I was used to no sleep, I was a doctor, for Christ's sake, but that night was different. The sleep I got was far from rejuvenating. I could only think, well, worry, about Jax.

I didn't tell him every thing I knew, but I guessed he assumed I knew a lot. Every person I spoke to about him told me to keep my relationship with him minimal, to treat him and get out with my life. I couldn't, though. I had to know his side of the story. I had to know him.

Smiling at a few of my coworkers, I made myself a coffee in the break room. I noticed a pair of nurses watching me as they whispered to each other. I wasn't in the mood for that bullshit. "Can I help you?" I wondered loudly when I got close to them. They both froze. "Are you guys in high school? Gossiping from afar? C'mon, tell me what's so interesting that you had to stalk me while I got myself some caffeine." My hands went to my hips and a sarcastic smile grew on my face.

The nurses exchanged a look before one cleared her throat and admitted, "We were talking about your new patient, Jax Teller. We don't think you should treat him, Scar." They both were fearful, and I felt slightly proud of myself. I was too nice to not at least be a little intimidating.

"Are you gonna tell me why you think this?" I rolled my eyes at having to ask. I knew I was one of the best doctors in this place, that's why I was hired, and why I was assigned to be Jax's doctor in the first place.

Nurse two looked down. "It's nothing against you," she quietly argued. "It's just... You create such a great relationship with your patients. That's a good thing... In most cases. We only care about you, Scarlett! Anybody who has a 'good relationship' with Jax Teller gets hurt. He ended up marrying the last doctor he got close with, and we all know how that ended!" They nodded in unison and watched for my reaction with wide, eager eyes. They actually thought I'd take their advice.

I grinned and put a hand on each of their shoulders. "I've heard it all already, ladies," I sighed, trying to remain polite. I'd never drop a patient. Not unless it was the absolute best choice for their sake. "He's a fragile man right now, and he doesn't scare me. Nothing that comes with treating him does. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to make my rounds." I patted their shoulders and walked away before I said what I was really thinking.

After going through the adorable Mr. Humphrey's breathing exercises with him, I entered Jax's room with a smile. He was chuckling at something on TV, and it was refreshing to see.

He shut the TV off and grinned. "Mornin', Doc!" He cheered. His whole attitude was bright today. It made me feel nice. "I feel great today, thanks for askin'." Jax's grin morphed into that little smirk I caught him doing a few times before. I felt myself start to blush, so I turned to grab his chart.

I took his vitals, and when the flushing of my face subsided, I faced him again. "I gotta check your head today, bud," I regretfully told him. I giggled when he scowled in response. "It's gonna be unpleasant for both of us, trust me. It's gonna be nasty." I flashed him my smile that got all of my older male patients to take their meds, and he was the one turning red.

Leaning over him, I undid Jax's bandages. He stiffened underneath me, and I felt like an idiot for involuntarily shoving my boobs in his face. I chose to ignore it all as I inspected his bald head and immense amount of stitches. Everything looked good, luckily. There was still nothing as nasty as a large recovering head wound, though.

After mentally composing myself, I stepped back and smiled at my patient. "You're healing great, Jax. You might be outta here faster than we thought," I joked in an attempt to lighten the mood. "How's everything else? Any severe pain?" I quirked an eyebrow at him and scribbled his progress down on the chart

Jax slowly shook his head. His eyes were downcast. "I'm alright," he lied through gritted teeth. He had only complained of pain once so far. With what he went through, there was no way he was 'alright.'

I sat down in my usual spot to the left of the bed and informed him, "You don't have to act tough here. You're in a damn hospital! I know it hurts." His eyes gradually moved up to meet mine as I touched his hand softly like I had before. I knew it comforted him from the way he reacted. "I'll get you more medicine. All you have to do is ask me. I'm at your beck and call." I winked and squeezed his hand. I was relieved when he laughed again.

"Thank you," Jax breathed. "For last night. And now. It's helping me cope, I guess. I'm glad you're my doctor." Something in his eyes changed when the words left his mouth. Something that made me both elated and scared.

Not able to rid myself of the smile I had, I looked down to avoid his gaze. "Yeah, me, too," I nodded. It was the truth. Despite everyone's warnings, I was happy I was the one working on him. "You know, if you ever wanna talk about what happened, or anything, I'm here. You don't have to keep it bottled up anymore." I allowed myself to glance at him once more as I offered a sympathetic smile. He was still watching me when I stood up.

Our eyes were on each other until I turned to leave. I was stopped, though, when Jax called after me. "How do you know me so well without even talking to me?" He questioned. His tone wasn't accusatory. It was more curious and amused.

I turned back to him with the same smile I had when I entered the room. "Let's just say we have more in common than most people would think."