Author's Note! Whooh! This chapter will be a SUPER game changer! Haha XD

Disclaimer Notice! I disclaim the franchise Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, they belong to its respective owner. What I do own on the other hand, was the story twist I made. That's all.

BLAMES, TEARS, AND REGRETS

A Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Fan Fiction

Chapter Nine

Almost

It was brutal - the kind of brutally that would surely haunt him in his sleeps. Raphael had never seen this side of his brother - the very brother who always scold him of being rash and 'violent'. He wanted to laugh - or perhaps giggle - at how ironic it had been.

Leonardo, the once quiet and calm turtle, is now the impatient one who wanted to rip his opponent simply because he had wasted precious five minute of his life.

It was a good thing that it was finally over. Leo had found out the device that made the enemy looked similar to their master. Donnie didn't seem even a bit disturbed when their fake master had turned into a human. As Raph had remembered it, only he and his little brother had literally hanged their mouth open when they saw it transformed. Ah, his appearance was worse when his true figure had been revealed. At one part, you could literally see the bone which was so close on piercing through the skin.

The man was soaked in his own blood and the open wounds that adore his skin that oozed with endless stream of blood like a broken faucet where the ones Leo made recently.

"Stop..."

The words were barely heard. The man almost rasped the words, as if he was having difficulty in speaking, which in Donnie's point of view, was the same as what he was feeling.

"I'll...I'll tell..." He spoke the next words in the same manner.

'Oh, so Leo only needs to let him bleed so he can talk? Ah, such effects a torture can give...' He could not deny the fear he felt when he saw his brother torture someone first hand; but, he had already let some of his childish antics go when they first started their training.

Leo's monster - he doesn't want to believe that they were the same person - had vanished upon hearing the rat - er - human agreed to his terms. He dropped his katana to the ground and instantly gripped the enemy's shoulders, threatening to twist and break whatever bones he had left if he ever decided to go against his rules.

"Tell me, in detail, whatever it is that you injected to my brothers," Leo hissed as he ask the first question that came on his mind. He deemed it the outmost priority, after all his brothers' life were in the line if it was something poisonous.

"A...a serum" the man said, barely breathing. Leo gripped his shoulders. Donnie heard a loud crack muffled together with the man's scream. "What serum?!" Leo was becoming more and more desperate.

"S-serum... For...ghosts.." Leo swallowed whatever it is that he was going to bicker back. He knew he had to be patient, for there was something more beyond the man's words.

"See...can't see...or hear..." Donnie saw the man's once sharp eyes slowing turning dull. 'Just a little bit more...' Donnie thought as he felt the rush of panic streaming down his nerves.

"Read...thoughts...can't see...but they are – there" his words slurred as he became more delusional.

Leo hesitated if he should grab the man's shoulder tighter to jolt his mind or simply wait for him to speak the next words.

'But he won't hear the end of it' his mind screamed - no - begged for him to just do it.

"Plan...greater...plan...bigger," the man's words slurred as his head swayed from side to side.

"Leo" Donnie spoke his brother's name, hoping that he could warn him. According to what his sight had caught, the man was nearing his limit. He would only last a few more minutes.

Even without his warning, Leo knew that his time was limited; but he wasn't certain on what to ask. Thousand questions still lingers in his head.

Raph growled as he stares at his brother's confused daze. He was standing before him, while Donnie was on his side and Mike, well, Donnie took him to Master Splinter when he saw the change in Leo's eyes. Mikey was too young to see those things.

Well, they all are.

"Leo! Damn it! Ask!" He screamed even though both he and Donnie knew that it won't reach his brother's ears.

"Tell me. Was there a cure?" Leo finally asked, his voice surprisingly calm. The man seemed to think for a moment.

He slowly turned his gaze towards Leo and stare deep within his eyes. He would have nodded if he had the strength.

"Lab...lair..." The spoken words gave them hope. All of them. Leo's eyes seemed to brighten. "How many?" He asked, trying to be sure; but the man had his eyes already closed the moment the question poured out of his mouth. Leo stared in horror as the body became limp and cold in his arms. The blood of his victim stained his hands.

He had killed.

He killed this man.

With his words.

With his hands.

Oh, what would Master Splinter say?

What would his brothers say?

His throat went dry as he quickly dropped the figure on the ground. The body fell with a thud.

With his head still faze from the horror he had to face, he scrambled to the kitchen hoping to erase whatever evidence placed on his hand.

He opened the faucet with such force it would have broken in half. His hands shivered as the flowing water took its curse around his bloody hands. He clenched his teeth, hoping that it would stop the tears that slowly formed at the corner of his eyes.

He desperately scrubbed his hands, hoping that it would wash off whatever sin he had committed. 'Get off...' He begged as he scrubbed his hands clean. But, whenever he stared at his hands, he could still see it red.

Whenever he opened his eyes, he could still see the blood that greatly reminds him of his deed.

I had killed.

Nothing can change that fact.

Tears were flowing at his cheeks like a river streaming in the forest - unstoppable. No, he had to remove it. He had to remove whatever it is that proves his sin. But, why? Why can't the blood be washed by the water?

The memories came rushing back at him - the look of his enemy, his swords piercing him, slowly delivering him to the death's door. It was his fault, his entire fault.

Donnie immediately went to Casey once they deemed that the enemy was dead. "Casey..." He called on his brother's friend as he tends to his wound. "It wasn't deep. You're fortunate," he spoke his observation loud enough for Casey to hear. Casey nodded at his direction. "You. How are you? I mean, the IV was cut right?" Casey asked. Even though his face was calm, it wasn't enough to mask the worry he felt inside.

"I don't feel anything strange..." Donnie replied, a hint of confusion was evident on his tone. "Mikey?" Casey asked. Donnie shook his head.

"And Raph?" He doesn't want to sound like he favors any of them, but he can't deny that he was more worried for the turtle he deemed as his best friend.

Donnie's eyes turned grim. Casey expects the worst.

As if on cue, Mikey appeared, heavily breathing. "What happened?!" Casey doesn't like to sound so demanding, but in a state of panic, he doesn't really have much control over his body.

"Please. Help Leo" Mikey said. His eyes were red and there are traces of tears on his cheeks. Casey gulped and stood up, he eased Splinter's head on the floor. He eyed Donnie as if asking him to take over. Donnie merely nodded in return; one could see the worry etched in his eyes.

Casey looked up to see Mikey almost dragging him towards the kitchen. As he went closer, he could see Raph standing by the doorway, screaming for Leo to stop whatever he is doing, even though both of them knew that none of his words, no matter how loud he voiced it out, would reach the ears of his brother.

Casey clenched his fist. He hissed as he went to Leo's side.

He saw Leo on his broken state. Leo's cheeks were wet with tears he can't control. His eyes were fixed on removing some invisible stain he saw covering both of his hands. Casey grabbed one of his arms and stared at him. Leo's eyes were wide, disbelief was evident on his face, as if he doesn't believe Casey exists at all.

Mikey didn't know if he should be glad that Leo had gotten some information out of the rat or should he be…disappoint of how Leo had obtain that information. Whatever emotion he should feel will come later after they made a decision on what action should they take next.

'So…they had Master Splinter?' They didn't need to look at their brother to see the fear in his eyes. Even his thoughts are quivering with fear. He looked over at Donnie, who is busy staring at the corpse and extracting out any further information he could harvest, and to Ralph, whose gaze is solemnly focused on the ground. Mikey sighed. 'What should we do now?' he thought.

They saw Leo walked towards the kitchen to watch his hands - his bloody hands. Even from a distance, Mikey could see that Leo was shaking. Then they heard a sniff. Is Leo…crying?

All three of them are hesitant. Should they go and try to comfort their leader?

Casey and Leo eased Splinter's body on the other make-shift bed just beside Michaelangelo's. Leo couldn't help but to steal glances on his brothers' lifeless body.

Failure. Why do I kept on failing them?

Even with Casey's assurance, Leo couldn't shrug the thought, the blame, the guilt he felt for what had happened to his family.

Why am I such a messed up leader?

"Leo," Casey called the blue-banded turtle. Leo looked back. "Yes?" he asked with a wearily voiced. "Leo, you should rest," Casey said, slowly pushing Leo out of the laboratory. "Come on, you deserve a break. I-I'll call April and ask her to come, so we would have an extra hand to take care of your family" Casey said with a soft smile. Leo merely stared at Casey. He seemed a lot calmer than he is, as if the possibility of his best friend – Raph – not waking up were not as dim as Leo saw it to be. Leo felt a twitched of anger swirled inside him; but he quickly pushed it away, finding it quite illogical to do so – and Leo is a very logical person.

Leo nodded and went into the sofa. Before he could lie down and settle himself on it, Casey grabbed him by his arm. "Leo, you should rest in your room where it is much comfortable," Casey suggested. Leo looked at him like he had grown a second head. "I mean, you would surely wake up stiff if you—"

"I need to be close to my brothers, as much as possible," Leo butted in. Casey looked a lost for a second before reasoning with him. "I would call for you if any changes were to happen. I promise" Casey said, stealing a glance behind Leo. Leo noticed this and his eyes turned to slit. "Are you Casey?" he asked. Casey could feel the anger radiating from the turtle. "O-of course I am!" he reasoned out. Leo reached for his katana. Casey panicked.

"Look Leo! Raph doesn't want you to stress yourself! As well as Mikey and Don! They said your body experiences serious fatigue that would fell the moment you close your eyes and took a deep breath!" Casey blurted out, shielding himself from the wrath of Leo. Leo stared at him. He knew that what Casey said was true. His body felt so numb. He was physically and emotionally distressed. He felt like his body would shut down any moment. But what he couldn't grasp were the words, they said, what is Casey saying?

Leo shook his head, feeling the fatigue over-controlling his body. He softly made his way upstairs, stealing one more glance at Casey whose eyes were still fixed on the place where he once stood. Without much thought, he opened his door and lie down on his body. True to Casey's words, the moment he closed his eyes, his body shut down.

Casey let out a breath he was holding. "God! I thought my body would be split in a half back there!"

Raph let out a chuckle. He was standing beside Casey. "He was really close on cutting you, you know" Raph said with a chuckle. Mikey joined the laugh as well. Donnie, who was standing beside Leo at that time, held a gaze of understanding. "You slipped back then," he pointed out. Immediately the three stopped laughing. Casey looked down, somewhat feeling ashamed. He scratched his head. "Yes, I guess I did"

"But why did Leo still—"

"Mikey, Leo's tired. His mind isn't functioning properly at that time" Donnie defended.

"Yeah, but he sure did noticed, right?" Mikey said, hope was evident in his voice. Raph nodded and crossed his hands. "I'm sure he did" Raph said.

"Oh right! Excuse me for a moment," Casey said all of a sudden. Three pairs of eyes watched him as he pulled out his phone from his pocket and dialed his girlfriend.

"Oh! Hey April!"

Author's Note! April comes in to play. How would the game turn out? Is Leo's side having the advantage? Or is it just a ploy Shedder made? Leave a review!