Warning: This story contains Mature Content.

My eldest daughter introduced me to the Ranma 1/2 video series one weekend when she returned home from college. The first season captivated me, but the rest was definitely not to my tastes. So, I decided to buy the manga.

Now then, one must justify such an indulgence in one way or another, so I decided that I wanted to learn the Japanese language and culture. I purchased all thirty-eight volumes of the Japanese language tankoban. These open the opposite of western books and magazines, because Japanese is traditionally read from top to bottom and right to left. Then I purchased several Japanese language dictionaries, grammar books and other complex tomes so I could become acquainted with Takahashi's work in her own language.

It was not until later that I found English interpretations of the Ranma 1/2 story online. I was shocked by the differences, even though perhaps I should not have been. The Japanese have very different attitudes about everything than we here in the west have, but they are especially different on matters of sex and sexuality. They are not nearly as prudish as we Americans are-or even the majority of Europeans.

The English interpretations I found on the web render Ranma Saotome and his cohorts as being very conformist and very polite Japanese. This is not what comes across in the Japanese language manga. Ranma is very nearly an American in his overall attitude and approach to life. He never uses any of the built-in niceties of the Japanese language. His dialogue is always as coarse and rude as it can be.

One must also understand that there are two different versions of the Japanese language. One, the very formal and polite version is spoken by the women. The other more coarse and less polite version is spoken by men, but Ranma never bothers with the polite forms that even the men use, even when he is in his female form. This dichotomy in the Japanese is a very large part of the humor in the Ranma 1/2 story, and the humour falls completely flat once it is rendered in English. I have attempted to make up for that in these interpretations of mine.

The Tendo's, by contrast, are very conformist, or as conformist as they can be, given their family situation, but even they are rather offbeat compared to the blandly polite nature of Japanese society as a whole. They and the Saotome defy nearly every convention of Japanese behavior which, I suppose, is what Takahashi-sensei wanted. What author in her right mind wants bland, colorless characters dominating their stories?

For instance, Genma and his wife, Nodoka, are the typical dysfunctional married couple in Japan. Nodoka loathes Genma, and Genma feels honor bound to do right by Nodoka, but cannot bear to be around her long enough to do his duty. Neither character is portrayed as being particularly sane. The remainder of the cast is equally extreme and are satiric stereotypes of typical Japanese people.

While reading this you should bear in mind that this is not a direct word-for-word translation of a text. The Ranma 1/2 story is a comic, and is told mainly in pictures. What little text exists in the story, is written in Japanese and the culture of the Japanese is so different from our own, that it is sometimes a complete mystery to all westerners.

This is my interpretation of what I have seen and read in the Japanese language comics. It is also a reflection of my knowledge of Japanese culture. I have done my best to put this story into a Japanese context, which VIZ never dreamed of doing. I do not blame them for that decision. This story is in a comic book or managa format. There is no room for such niceties.

There will be many who have read the bowdlerized English versions of the story, who will hotly dispute these interpretations of mine. So be it. I am not Japanese and I am unable to speak Japanese. Rather than smoothly translate Japanese into English, I struggle to decode it. Everything here is based on what I have been able to glean from travelogues and the descriptions of Japan and the Japanese that I have been able to find in books and on the world wide web. Hang on to your hats! This is going to be a wild ride.

Ranma 1/2, The Gritty Version: Volume 1 Part 1
Ranma Arrives

The sign read "Tendou School of Unrestricted Fighting," which is rather non-lyrical on top of being an uncomfortable mouthful, so we'll say it is the "Tendou School of Anything Goes Martial Arts." That is still rather a mouthful, but at least this revised version has a little better euphony. The Japanese are rather picky about euphony.

What the sign does not say, but all of the locals automatically understood, is that it implied that this astonishingly upscale residence is also the center for an asset recovery service, and that its owner, Soun Tendo, very often goes around with merchants, plumbers, electricians and general contractors for a fee when they are collecting their debts. Normally, all Soun needs to do on such occasions is to wear his dark-colored gi and look menacing-something that Soun was very accomplished at. He made the bulk of his money from these kinds of operations. He was so intimidating that when he ran for a seat on the Nerima city council, no one would run against him.

Soun had three daughters living with him. The eldest was named Kasumi. She took over for her mother after Soun's wife died. She has been going out of her way to be virtuous, and to make a good example for her two younger sisters, largely to no avail. At nineteen, she is very nearly a spinster by Japanese standards.

The middle girl, Nabiki, has a great deal of her mother in her. She is always on the lookout for the next yen, and will do almost anything to make money-except having sex with a guy. Having sex with guys is a very risky business, but having sex with other willing girls is an entirely different thing.

The youngest girl, Akane, fancies herself to be a martial artist, like her father. She works at it very hard. She runs five miles every day in the early morning. She grabs a quick bath when she returns home and then eats breakfast. She and Nabiki then go to school at Furinkan High School several blocks away from their house, Tendo-ke. They take forty-five minutes to get to school on foot, mostly because Nabiki does not like to walk fast and get sweaty, and Akane is still tired from her long morning run.

But this is Saturday and it is not, a school day. Saturday classes were canceled for inclement weather, but the approaching typhoon turned away from Tokyo at the very last minute, spinning into the land down the coast from the big city. It did, however, give Nerima a good soaking rain. Well, a series of thunderstorms, really, but who's worrying about something so minor? Certainly not the mailman. He delivered the mail to Tendou-ke right on time-just before Akane returned from her long run that morning. Soun was surprised to find a postcard from China in his mailbox. He was even more surprised to see that it was from his old friend and partner in minor crime, Genma Saotome.

Interpreted into English it read, "Have been on a training trip in China. Am returning to Tokyo with Ranma. Will be there soon. Genma."

This brought tears to Soun's eyes, admittedly it took very little to bring tears to the eyes of Soun Tendou since the death of his wife, but this was an especially emotional moment for him. The promises would finally be realized at last. Genma's son would marry one of Soun's daughters, and the he and Saotome would have a nice long lazy future to look forward to. Surely the boy, being young and vital, could take over the combined schools and do well for all of them. Soun and Genma would take only advisory roles in the family business. It would be all sunshine and shogi (Japanese chess) from now on-and Kasumi's cooking. Mustn't forget that.

Soun jumped to his feet and called out in an excited voice, "Akane!"

There was no answer, so he ran and stuck his head into the kitchen. "Kasumi!"

Kasumi was in the middle of cutting up vegetables for supper and was startled half out of her wits. She very nearly nipped her finger with the sentoku she was cutting the vegetables with.

She looked up from her cutting board with widened eyes and asked, "Father?"

Soun was too excited to pay attention to what he had just nearly done to his eldest daughter. He ran up the stairs and shouted, "Nabiki!"

Nabiki was stretched out on her bed reading a clothing catalog and was working on a frozen fruit treat on a stick when her father shouted her name.

"Mmm?" She grunted too late. Soun ran back down the stairs shouting Akane's name.

"Where can that girl be?" Soun demanded to no one in particular. "She's never around when I want her."

Knowing that Akane should be returning from her daily run and would most likely go out to the dojou, Nabiki went downstairs after her father to see what he wanted. It came as a shock. Kasumi was standing in the main room drying her hands with a dish towel, while her father was running from room to room calling out Akane's name.

"What's going on, Sis?" Nabiki asked.

"Father said something about an omiai," Kasumi said with a blush. "I'm not sure when it is to take place, but apparently, all three of us need to attend."

[Note: An omiai is a special meeting between prospective wedding partners, typically arranged by a paid matchmaker. The man usually picks up the tab for any expenditures along with the matchmaker's fee.]

This brought Nabiki up short. "All three of us? What are we supposed to be? Brood mares?"

"Well, you know father. That is how he thinks of us."

"Akane!" Soun shouted. "Where is that girl?" The rain insisted on muffling the Tendou patriarch's shouts.

"Oh, this is going to be fun," Nabiki said in a wry voice. "Aren't you looking forward to meeting our new beaus?"

"I just hope there's an older man among them," Kasumi said. "Boys need to be raised, and I think I have had enough of raising children."

"You stay here, Sis," Nabiki said with an evil grin. "I'll go fetch Akane."

"Oh, I do hope she'll be tolerant. She is such a fussbudget."

"Especially when it comes to boys, huh?" Nabiki said over her shoulder as she strolled out to the dojou. Kasumi shuddered.

Why her father never looked in the dojou to find Akane was something of a mystery to Nabiki. Akane was seldom anywhere else in Tendo-ke. She spent whole days on end in the dojo doing kata and other martial arts related exercise. Sure enough, Nabiki strolled in just as Akane finished off a pile of helpless hadite blocks.

"There you go again, working out your frustrations on innocent cinder blocks. No wonder all the boys at school think you're queer."

"I don't care, Nabiki," Akane said in her preternaturally sharp voice. "For some of us, the whole world does not revolve around boys."

"No?" Nabiki asked in a nonchalant tone of voice as she placed both hands on the back of her head, thus forcing her breasts into very notable prominence. Nabiki then turned her back on her younger sister and said, "Then I don't suppose that this would interest you." Nabiki strolled back into the house and left Akane in the dojou, expectind Akane's curiosity to do the rest.

Nabiki's trick worked. The three of them sat down on one side of the dinner table while their father sat on the other-alone. Nabiki was amused by the entire thing, and fully intended to play it for every last laugh she could get out of it. She was the family bookkeeper and knew full well how her father's business was conducted. She also knew that her younger sister's efforts were for naught. Akane would never be able to step into her father's shoes. Japan was a patriarchy and would remain so for the foreseeable future. Akane would die of old age before society would respect her the way it did Soun Tendo.

Tough smart women realized the nature of Japanese society and adopted their own rules for survival. A great many of them in Kasumi's generation and younger were refusing to marry, living at home with their parents. Akane, on the other hand, seemed bound and determined to live in defiance the rules. She was doing her best to become a male. Biology was getting in her way, of course, but Akane never let something like reality bother her or force her to deviate from what she wanted. Nope. The girl was determined to get what she wanted in the exact fashion she wanted to get it. Nabiki had tried several times to convince her younger sister to become more adaptable, but to no avail. Once Akane made up her mind about something, it was nearly impossible to persuade her that she was wrong.

Not that it mattered, of course. Nabiki had her own plans for the poor hapless schmucks about to be delivered into her needle sharp claws. They would get no where with any of them, if Nabiki had any say in the matter. She knew and understood how desperate to get away Kasumi was, even though a casual observer would think that Kasumi was perfectly content. Akane seemed to really and truly hate boys, but she was secretly turned on by them, and was at war with herself over it. Nabiki pretended to like boys, but actually preferred their money to them. Their money would never get her pregnant, while the boys could if she let them. She did have sexual urges, but took that out on the girls who were willing, at Furinkan and other high schools in the Nerima district. Her father's pitch on behalf of their upcoming omiai was laughable and lame, just as she had expected.

"He is the son of a very good friend of mine. His name is Ranma Saotome. He'll be here later today. If one of you three were to marry him, then this dojou's future wold be secure."

Nabiki stifled a laugh as her two sisters became both outraged and alarmed. There three Tendou girls, yet her oaf of a father had the gall to bring in only one guy. What frikkin' laugh! Her inner voice screamed.

"Wait just a damned minute," Akane shouted. Her voice was loud enough to drown out the steady rain. "Don't we get some say in who we marry?"

"Akane's right, Father," Kasumi chimed in. "We've never even met this-Ranma-before."

"That shortcoming is easily overcome," Soun said with unruffled calm. "He will be here today."

END OF FIRST SCENE

Out on the far western fringe of Nerima, Genma Saotome was having a difficult time with his suddenly recalcitrant son. Well, to be truthful the boy was a girl at that particular moment because they had been caught out in the rain. Genma was not himself either, but was instead in his panda form. The onlookers, quite understandably, had no clue about what was actually happening. As far as they could tell, a cute red headed oriental girl, that's right, red headed and oriental, she even had blue eyes beneath her epicanthal folds, was fighting off a panda. To their astonishment, the girl seemed to have the upper hand with the panda.

Genma could care less about what the crowd of onlookers thought. His focus was on his feminine son. He was desperate to get the boy to Tendou-ke so that the boy could meet one of Soun's three daughters. Ranma had just turned sixteen. The boy's testicles had finally dropped. They might have descended sooner, but Genma had kept his son on short rations for the whole of their ten year training trip. He had not known that food and body weight had a lot to do with the onset of puberty with both boys and girls.

In fact, Ranma had not shown any interest in girls as girls until he had fallen into that spring at Jusenkyou. Now the boy was determined to find a cure for his curse, and wanted to return to China. Genma knew that they had already worn out their welcome in that huge country. It was communistic; they were rowdy Japanese low-lifes. There was no way they could go back anytime soon. The fact that they had roamed across the whole of China being pursued by a fanatical member of the Amazon tribe had stirred up so much trouble for them, that Genma doubted that they would be able to safely return for at least a decade.

His son, on the other, hand, did not have a clue about how the real world worked. He just wanted to be rid of his curse, and seemed willing to kill Genma if it became necessary for him to do so. Fortunately, old age and treachery were more than a match for youth and enthusiasm.

Shortly after Onna-Ranma [Note: Onna is Japanese for woman.] threw his panda form father to the ground and announced that he had not time for fiancées, which the onlooking mob found puzzling because Ranma was in his female form when he said it, and that he was going back to China and that Genma could suck on it if he did not like it. Ranma proceeded to put on his heavy pack and started marching off, when Genma spied a nearby traffic sign that he could pull out of the ground easily. He grabbed the sign in his right paw, pulled it out of the ground and whacked the back of Onna-Ranma's head with it. This had the satisfying result of rendering the unsuspecting Onna-Ranma unconscious without so much as a whimper.

Genma picked his son up and threw him over his shoulder as though the boy were a sack of potatoes. The crowd looked as though they might try to interfere with him, so he roared at them. They all backed away immediately. He grabbed their two heavy packs and made his way toward Tendo-ke, disappearing into the curtains of rain.

Damn! I hope Soun is having better luck with his girls than I am with this hard headed boy of mine. Oh, hell! It doesn't really matter. The boy's nuts have dropped, and Soun's youngest is sixteen by now. They are all in their prime breeding years. Ranma's not bad looking, so if we can just keep them together for a while, nature will take its course-I hope. This crazy curse complicates things no end.

Back at Tendo-ke, Nabiki was being overly enthusiastic, while her two sisters were blatantly reluctant. Nabiki had her father right where she wanted him. She could smell-no-taste!-the money she was going to claw out of him. They had been living off of the last big score he had made, right before he married their mother. He had been very active as a husband and provider up until her mother died. Now all father did was to take light duty work that came in from the locals. It was all small time stuff, and Nabiki wanted more. Life around Tendo-ke was boring her out of her skull.

"My old friend Genma and his son, Ranma, have spent the last ten years yamagomori [NOTE: Yamagomori is wandering about living off the land while getting in as much martial arts training as can be done.]. At the very end, they crossed over into China," Soun announced in pompous tones.

"China?" Nabiki asked as though that really tripped her out. 9China at that time was still very much a backwater unless one was speaking of Shanghai or Hong Kong. The rest of China was basically just fly-over country to be avoided by people who preferred the comforts of civilization.) "That's so, neat!"

Kasumi, the eldest remained unimpressed. "How old is he, Father?"

Akane was even less impressed. "Hmph! What's so great about walking to China? It's just walking. Anybody can walk."

The falling rain filled the ensuing silence with tiny pattering sounds as though a herd of kittens were playing on the roof of the house.

Nabiki fought off the urge to tell her younger sister that China was on the other side of the Sea of Japan, and that there was no walking to China, but managed to restrain herself for the sake of wry amusement. Their father seemed rather perturbed by the reactions of his youngest and eldest daughters. He seemed encouraged by his middle daughter's reactions though, and that was exactly what Nabiki wanted. She had plans for this Ranma and his father-and herself, of course.

"What kind of man is this Ranma, Father?" Kasumi asked.

"Yeah, is he good looking?" Nabiki asked. Akane snorted and turned her head as though she were completely disinterested, but Nabiki knew better. She knew that Akane's nipples were so hard that they ached.

"I have no idea," Soun said. "I have yet to meet him."

"No idea?" Nabiki and Kasumi chorused. Nabiki was secretly amused and not the least bit surprised, but Kasumi was beside herself with shock and embarrassment. Akane merely rolled her eyes and continued to feign disinterest.

Akane whips every boy Furinkan has on its roles on a daily basis, so she probably thinks that this Ranma guy will be a pushover, Nabiki thought. I'm betting that he is a lot better than she is. It's going to be fun watching her get her comeuppance for a change. I must protect Kasumi, though. She's the obvious choice among the three of us. He might choose her and they will both be miserable for the rest of their lives. Oh, the sacrifices I make for my family.

About that time, they all heard a loud ruckus at the front door. Nabiki gasped.

An unfamiliar, but high pitched voice howled in language that only a Japanese male would use, "Getcher nasty paws offa me you doofy bastard!"

"That must be them!" Nabiki exclaimed. She got to her feet and thrust her breasts forward as she ran for the front door. Soun fell in behind is middle daughter.

Kasumi slowly rose to her feet and fiddled with her hair. "I do so hope he's older. Younger men bore me."

Akane got to her feet with a sigh and then muttered, "How depressing. Boys! I hate them!"

Nabiki was shocked by what she saw at the door when her father opened it. There was a panda and a red headed waif fighting tooth and nail on the doorstep. The panda picked the waif up and threw it over its shoulder. The waif began pounding the panda's back while screeching the longest string of curses that Nabiki had ever heard. This apparition panicked her and her father. They turned together and thundered back down the hall towards the tatami room as fast as they could run, with the panda and the red headed waif in close pursuit.

"Ah, come on, Shit-daddy! Put me down. Look at what yer doin', wouldja? Yer scarin' 'em spit-less! They got no idea of who you are, you ignorant ass!"

Nabiki stared as the panda set the waif on its feet in front of them. Nabiki could not tell at first whether the waif was male of female. All she could tell was that it needed a bath very badly. The panda stank as well. There were literally caked with road grime and sweat. The waif seemed deeply embarrassed-as well it should.

"I'm Ranma Saotome," the waif said in a contrite voice. "I am very sorry about this."

That was the most polite thing that Nabiki had heard coming from the waif's mouth.

"Father, is this your friend?" Kasumi asked in a frightened voice.

Soun vigorously shook his head no, making his long hair flail about like the tail of a horse harried by flies.

"Oh, so this panda just dropped this waif off!" Nabiki shouted sarcastically. "Happens all the time! Why should we be surprised?"

Nabiki suddenly remembered her game plan. The waif had introduced itself as Ranma Saotome. So, where is his father? Why did a panda carry him in here over its shoulder?

Soun broke into tears, as he was to prone to do. "You're-you're Ranma?"

The waif nodded his head. Soun was overcome with joy and seized him by the upper arms, and then pulled him into a bear hug. That was when Nabiki saw the alarms in her father's head go off. It was like watching his head explode. He pushed the foul smelling waif back and then proceeded to work his hands over its hour glass figure.

Wait a minute! Hourglass figure? Why would a boy have an hourglass figure? Nabiki thought. Surely he's not a girl? How could Daddy be so confused about his old friend's kid?

Nabiki waited for an opening, ran up to Ranma an poked at a bulbous projection on "his" chest. It was very soft and the nipple was puckered from the cold.

The waif was clearly made uncomfortable by Nabiki's attention said in a soft voice, "Hang on a minute. Please stop doing that."

Nabiki turned her head so that everyone would hear her and shouted, "He's a she!"

All that could be heard for a prolonged stretch of time was the pattering of the falling rain. Soun fell on his back in a dead faint, banging his head on the tatami [NOTE: Tatami are mats made of rice straw and they are used to cover the formal rooms of Japanese homes.] Kasumi fetched a pillow while Akane raised her father's head and then lowered it gently to the pillow that Kasumi had brought. Everyone, including the panda and the waif, sat around staring at the inert Tendo patriarch. Nabiki could only just barely contain herself when Kasumi started bathing his brow with cool water. A short gust of wind howled outside, blowing rain against the outer walls for a few seconds. A little wind blown mist made its way into the tatami room, licking all their faces as though a clowder of ghostly cats passed through. Soun moaned and groaned. Nabiki forced herself to hold in her giggles for later.

"Poor Daddy," Kasumi said in her normally polite way, "He was so disappointed that he passed out."

"Disappointed?" Nabiki shouted. "He's disappointed? He got us a girl for a fiancé! What do you make of that?"

"Oh, knock it off, Sis!" Akane all but shouted. "He-I mean she's our guest."

Nabiki noticed that the waif was staring hard at the tatami as though it might well be given a pop quiz on what a rice mat looked like. Her pose screamed, I'm embarrassed beyond all belief, which hit Nabiki's rather sadistic funny bone. She took it out on her father, of course.

"This is all your fault, Dad!" Nabiki shouted. "How could you have made such a silly mistake?"

"Genma told me that his wife had a boy, not a girl!" Soun suddenly spoke up in his own defense, but Nabiki was in the mood to needle him.

She seized the waif's left breast and gave it a squeeze. "This is a girl's, you know!" She gave Ranma's breast another hard squeeze just to feel her nipple stiffen again. "You'll never find one of 'em on a guy!"

"Please stop, doing that," Ranma managed to get out in an embarrassed croak.

Nabiki gave it yet one more squeeze just to make certain how the girl was reacting. She was definitely being turned on despite herself.

Akane suddenly rose to her feet and asked the blushing Onna-Ranma, "Would you like to have a look at our dojou?"

Nabiki watched Ranma give Akane a grateful stare.

"My name is Akane. Would you like to be friends?"

That melted Ranma like butter sitting on the stove, Nabiki thought. She must have led a long lonely life so far. She has enough muscle to be a guy, under all that feminine good looks. Even though it is all hidden under several weeks of travel grime. I wonder where her father is? It doesn't matter. He's a she and the party is over now. I think I'll go back upstairs. I have a lot of wishing left to do.

Nabiki went back upstairs leaving Kasumi to look after their useless father and their newly acquired pet panda, as Akane led Ranma out to her prized dojou. Nabiki found herself trying to suppress a derisive snort. Good luck, Akane. You have just met your match. That girl is worth ten of your feathery butt.

END OF SECOND SCENE

Akane had been longing to have another girl to test herself against. Soun had long ago stopped training her seriously. All he would do was guide her through the family school's kata. There were twelve of them, and Akane practiced them all everyday, but it was not the same as having a well-practiced opponent to test oneself against.

The two of them stopped at the door to the dojou and bowed to the kamidana [NOTE: Kamidana literally means "God-shelf," which is a small shrine hung on a wall in each and very Japanese dojo.] in unison.

Formalities finished the two of them entered the sacred space. Ranma looked around casually as though she were deeply impressed. Akane found herself preening over that. "You've been studying kempo [NOTE:Kenpo is Chinese self-defense.], yes?"

"A little," Ranma replied in a modest voice. She sounded timid To Akane.

Good, Akane thought. She's intimidated. I may as well have a go at her now. It will be my best shot at winning against her. Daddy has never taken me yamagomori and her father has-for ten years! She must know a hell of a lot more about the art than I do.

Thunder rumbled in the near distance as Akane adopted her favorite ready stance from the first kata.

"Why don't we have a little match, then?" She asked Ranma.

All signs of timidity vanished from Ranma's cute face. She suddenly looked confident-too confident for Akane's liking.

"Don't worry," Akane said in a voice that sounded brave, but she knew that she was quivering from the top of her scalp to the very soles of her bare feet. "I'll go easy on you."

Ranma grinned. "Really?"

Then, to Akane's fear and utter fury, Ranma stood watching her keenly with her hands behind her back. Akane pulled in a deep breath through her nose and launched the first punch she had learned in the first kata [NOTE: Kata is the Japanese word for form. Each school of martial arts has its own unique kata, even though many of them are so similar that they are difficult for a layman to distinguish. Oh, and Japanese nouns do not have plural forms.]. Ranma slipped it easily with a wan smile on her face. That angered Akane even more. She was determined to make this girl respect her skills.

Akane worked her way through all twelve of the kata, throwing everything she knew at the odd girl, but Ranma easily stepped to one side, hopped over her attacks or simply slipped her punches with a minimum of effort.

Is she reading my moves? Akane wondered. I've got to try harder.

She started mixing up the moves she had learned in the kata, but Ranma seem to see exactly what she was going to do in advance. She may as well have handed the girl her entire game plan written out on a piece of paper. No, that was not right. This girl was good and had hours and hours of practice. Akane tried to speed up her moves, but to no avail. Ranma just kept dancing and dodging out of Akane's way. Akane could not touch the red headed girl. It made Akane furious.

She began to tire after about twenty minutes, and she misjudged one of her punches. Ranma leapt straight up into the air as Akane's fist slammed into the wall behind her and broke through it. It was as though the wood of the wall was paper.

This seemed to mildly impress Ranma, as she landed behind Akane. Akane was trying to extricate her hand without driving any splinters into her arm and wrist. Ranma poked the back of Akane's head with the tip of her index finger and let out a very feminine giggle. She sounded as though she were embarrassed.

Akane laughed out loud. Here she was, her hand caught in a wall and helpless, but the girl was satisfied to touch the back, of her head with a gentle poke. Ranma hastened to help Akane free her hand even as they laughed.

"That is about as decisive as I could ever ask for!" Akane said in an admiring voice. "You won!"

Ranma shyly gave Akane a sad little smile in return. It seemed as though she regretted her easy victory. Akane rushed ahead with what she wanted to say next anyway. "I'm just glad that you are not a boy. I would hate losing to a boy." Akane shuddered. "I don't know what I would do if that ever happened."

Ranma seemed to be deeply disturbed by this, but said nothing. They took their time cooling down in the dojo with light exercise for the next few minutes with the sound of the incessant rain outside as their only accompaniment.

END OF THIRD SCENE

Back in the house, Genma had scrubbed down and was getting a hot bath, which changed him back into his natural form. Soun recognized him as soon as he stepped out of the furoba.

They went back to the tatami room and sat down for a long tearful conversation about the Saotomes' prolonged yamagomori. It was a long sad story, not all that unusual for a trouble prone man like Genma. They were sitting in tearful silence across from one another. The rain had finally dropped to a mere sprinkle, and the atmosphere quickly became muggy. The engawa door was wide open and an oscillating fan was moving as much air as it possibly could.

Nabiki strolled by the tatami room on her way to the kitchen saying nothing, but took note of the stranger sitting opposite of her father. She made her way into the kitchen and asked Kasumi about him, "Who's that old man sitting in there with, Daddy, Kasumi?"

"I have no idea," Kasumi answered in her usually calm voice. "Would you see to it that the furo [NOTE:Furo is Japanese for hot tub. Nearly every Japanese domicile has on in some form or another, many of them are ingenious owing to the small size of most Japanese houses. Where possible, the toilet(s) is in a room of its own.] is hot for Akane and Ranma, please?"

"Sure, Sis," Nabiki said cheerfully. "I'll go check it right now.

Being the one who actually wrote out the checks to pay the bills, Nabiki was eager to make certain that they economized in every way possible. It cost a great deal of money to heat enough water to fill a furo. She had been after Soun to buy an on demand heater for it for months to no avail. He wanted fresh water to soak in. Nabiki did not care about second or third uses of hot water, provided they did not have to spend a fortune on both water and gas, but her old fashioned father did not agree with her.

Nabiki walked into the furoba [NOTE: a furoba is a two part room for bathing. One part is for soaping up and scrubbing, often with only cold water, the other half will usually contain the furo, or hot tub, for soaking.]. She cast her eye around the small steamy room and spied some coarse black and white hairs on the floor drain in the wash area. With a shrug, she stuck her hand in the furo. She decided that the water needed to be warmed a little for the waif and her sister, so she drained a few inches of water out and then replaced it with fresh hot water. It was then that she spotted yet more black and white hair clinging to the side of the furo.

She worried that it would gross Akane out so she scooped it up and walked out of the furoba. She turned and went upstairs without saying anything to her father and the chunky middle aged man sitting across from him. She shook her head. Both of the men had tears streaming down their faces and the fading sunlight glinted off the shining trails running down their cheeks. The chunky man with the old fashioned glasses and battered gi looked for all the world like a Crying Buddha, which caused Nabiki to shiver involuntarily.

END OF FOURTH SCENE

Kasumi finished up the vegetables and went to see about her younger guest. Ranma was sitting on the engawa with her legs dangling over the edge, staring morosely at a spot on the distant garden wall.

"The bath is ready, Ranma-chan," Kasumi said to the red headed waif.

"No-No, I don't really need to bathe, right now," Ranma said.

Kasumi sniffed. "What are you talking about? You've been working out, and you needed a bath when you arrived this morning. Now, go get a bath. Dinner will be ready soon."

Ranma looked sheepish and nodded her fiery head as she accepted the towel Kasumi had offered her. She trudged off toward the furo as though she were about to attend her own execution.

Kasumi watched Ranma's back as she left the engawa, shaking her head with disapproval. More trouble, Kasumi thought. This is the karma my father has brought upon his family for his sins. Buddha give me patience. Life is so hard when you have a family like mine. It is nearly impossible to make up for their sins.

Ranma realized that Kasumi had been right as he pealed off his clothing. He really was dirty and smelly. His heavy breasts, which he hated with a passion, flopped around uncomfortably as he dragged one of the plastic bathing stools out into the scrubbing area of the furoba. He sat down on it and soaped up with genuine relief. He was in dire need of a bath, sure enough, and it felt good to be washing himself clean, even if he was in his cursed form. Once he was thoroughly scrubbed and rinsed, he climbed into the furo for a nice hot soak, for which his muscles seemed to have been crying out for days without him having noticed their condition.

It felt tremendously good to sit down in a large tub of hot water. He transformed into his natural form as his feet touched the steaming hot water, but he had expected that. It felt good to be male and warming up at the same time.

Shit! What am I going to tell that Akane girl? She thinks that I'm a girl just like her-well-not just like her. She's bound to know that I'm a better fighter than she is, but she's confused about my sex and with good reason. The change is complete every time I get hit with cold water. Damn you, Shit-daddy! This is yet another fine mess you have gotten me into. One more thing and I swear I'm gonna leave your lazy ass here and go looking for a cure to this curse.

END OF FIFTH SCENE

As Akane stepped up onto the engawa, Nabiki reached the bottom of the stairs.

"There's hot water in the furo, Akane!" Nabiki said as she headed for the kitchen. "Better get bathed. Dinner's almost ready."

"Thank you, Nabiki. I need a bath pretty badly."

Akane walked into the dressing part of the furoba and saw Ranma's clothes lying on top of the overloaded hamper.

"I guess we can bathe together," Akane said aloud as she stripped off her sticky gi. It had turned yellow over the years from having been soaked repeatedly in her sweat. She had really worked it hard, but Ranma had defeated her almost out of hand. Akane was eager to have another talk with the strange red head.

Oh, well, at least Ranma's a girl, Akane thought. I won't have to worry about her getting any ideas about me the way I would have to worry about a boy wanting to take me right after he defeated me.

With that thought still running through her head, Akane picked up a towel and held it in front of herself for the sake of polite modesty. She was shocked witless by what she saw as she stepped into the bathing room. There was this lean, but muscular boy clambering out of the furo. His belly was rippled and his shoulders were broad and square. He was deeply tanned as though he had been outside a great deal with a minimum of clothing. In other words, he was the most gorgeous specimen of a young male that Akane had ever laid her eyes on.

He had just stepped on the edge of the furo with his right foot when she walked in. Her eyes followed the contours of his body down to his hairy crotch, where his prick was rapidly swelling and lengthening. In mere seconds it was as long as half his thigh, as big around as a soda can; it started throbbing with tiny little jerks. Akane had never been so thrilled by the sight of anything in her entire life. Her nipples stood up as her labia moistened and started puffing out, and her eyes got as wide as dinner plates.

Then a question ran through her head. Who is this guy and what is he doing in our furoba? Her arousal vanished as quickly as it had manifested itself when her fear started stabbing her heart. She dropped her towel, stepped back into the dressing room, put on the top of her gi. Thus partially dressed, she stepped out into the engawa. There, she put her back to the door, sucked in a deep, deep breath, and then started screeching at the top of her voice.

"Chikan! There's a masher in our furoba! She sprinted down the engawa until she reached the open sliding doors and ran out into the yard. She then pushed the cap off of the stone lantern in the yard and seized its body and heaved it up off its pedestal.

"I'll pin that low life stripper to the bottom of the furo with this heavy weight!" Akane screamed.

By now, everyone in the house had their attention on her, but Nabiki was the first to ask an intelligent question, "What's going on, Akane? Why are you picking up that heavy rock?

"There's a perverted boy in the furo! I'm going to drop this heavy-assed lamp on him!" Akane shouted in answer.

"Why didn't you just use your martial arts on him?" Nabiki asked.

"Because he startled me out of my wits, okay?" Akane shouted back.

Kasumi was suddenly horrified. "Oh, my! Ranma-chan was in there. I hope he didn't assault her!"

At that moment, Ranma in his naturally masculine form stepped out of the furoba into the engawa and said, "Well, uh..."

"Who is he?" Nabiki asked. She was very much taken with the boy's general appearance.

Kasumi exclaimed, "Oh, my darling!" She was completely mesmerized.

Akane simply stared in hostile silence. She had already gotten more than two eyeballs full of the young man now fully dressed in clean clothes and standing in the engawa.

"Ranma Saotome, here. Sorry about all this," Ranma said in a very contrite yet very masculine voice. He was clearly embarrassed by the current situation.

Akane, who had seen him naked and fully tumescent, was horrified. Her older sisters were simply captivated by his appearance and were so busy undressing him in their imaginations that they never gave the idea that he claimed to have the same name as the red headed waif a second thought."

Akane suddenly remembered what she was holding, and put the large stone body of the lamp back on its pedestal. Soun managed to calm things down and herded them all into the tatami room. After everyone was seated in seiza, the typical formal sitting position traditional with the Japanese, as well as being reasonably calm, Soun cleared his throat and said, "Allow me reintroduce our guests. This is my old friend and his son."

Genma spoke up and his voice rumbled like large rocks in an avalanche, "Saotome Genma here, and this is my son..."

"Ranma," the very male Ranma said, finishing Genma's sentence. Unlike the girl they had met earlier, This Ranma's hair was as black and straight as any Japanese, but it had reddish highlights and his eyes were a stormy grey-blue.

Genma, on the other hand, was wearing a white rag on his head and was clad in an ancient white gi that had seen better days. His glasses lacked earpieces, but had elastic bands looped behind his ears. He had stubborn stubble on his chin that had resisted Soun's razor and he looked much like two large pieces of rounded stone heaped one on top of the other. He was burned deep brown by prolonged exposure to the sun, just as Ranma was. They looked as though they might be from another race, compared to the other men the girls had seen.

END OF LAST SCENE OF PART 1 VOLUME 1

Those of you who have read the manga in conjunction with this interpretation will realize that I have added some thoughts and dialogue that is not in the original story. As soon as you make an attempt to convert any comic to prose, I'm sure that you will understand why this is the case. Things that are obvious from pictures are not obvious in prose. Further, I made an effort to put this story into what I believe is its proper cultural context and have relied on interviews of Takahashi-sensei about the Ranma 1/2 story.