Big Girls Don't Cry

It was very loud outside her room. The almost nine year old drew her knees up into arms, flashlight loosely hanging from her fingers. She didn't like all those people in her home. There were dozens of agents stationed all throughout the tower and they wouldn't leave her alone. Every couple of minutes the door to her room would creak open and after a few covert mumbles into a transmitter they would close the door. This time, they found her sitting up, giving them a half-hearted wave. The agent wasn't even phased; with a moments paused, they closed the door slowly. She sighed. She didn't really know why she didn't like them. She just felt uneasy. She wished her family was home. She wished her dad would just come back already.

A light snore drew her attention to the side where her 7 year old cousin slept on the makeshift cot, clutching a plushy version of the Hulk. Elijah loved the attention. All these agents meant more people to play with him and try out some of his 'inventions.' The same guy who kept trying to play hide-and-seek with her, wore a strainer with wires attached on his head for two hours just to appease her younger cousin. She was less enthused with all the attention. It wasn't the agent's fault- it wasn't even that strainer-hat guy's fault-they all seemed nice enough. Still whenever they were there, it meant all of her family wasn't. She couldn't shake the feeling that something very bad could happen. Sleep was impossible. She tossed the flashlight from hand-to-hand, feeling antsier by the minute. Eventually she knew she had to get up. Quietly, she slipped on her furry panda bear slippers and headed to the door. Her hand stopped short of the handle; her cousin was still fast asleep. She didn't want him to be left alone. Rather than waking up the world's crabbiest kid, she nestled the flashlight next to him, just to make sure he wouldn't be scared if he woke to find her gone. Satisfied, she opened the door, leaving it ajar, and stepped into the busy living room. She would be quick-grab some milk, maybe a few graham crackers and then hurry off to her room again.

Peering around the hallway corner, she saw her living room bustling with agents and their monitoring equipment. If they took notice of the little girl, they didn't say anything. Evy hoped to keep it that way. Scurrying across the perimeter of the wall, she made her way to the dimly lit kitchen. Just to her luck that same weird agent was sitting at the kitchen table. She dropped to the floor, thinking she might be able to crawl her way under the table and to the fridge; she had just barely made it under the table when the cloth was lifted up.
"What are you doing down there little lady?" the weird agent guy asked. At least he wasn't wearing the strainer on his head anymore which definitely made it easier to talk to him without starring. After all, her dad told her starring wasn't very nice.
"Pretty late to be playing, isn't it?"
"I'm not," she mumbled "I was going to get a glass of milk." She got up from her knees to address the towering agent.
"Are you allowed to have milk so late?"
"Sometimes," she responded. "When I can't sleep or my stomach is queasy, dad'll bring me some milk." The agent nodded and retrieved a glass from the cupboard.
"Are you sick to your stomach?"
"Kinda, but not 'sick' sick. Just nervous sick." Evy withdrew the carton, reveling in the biting chill that escaped from the fridge. She closed the door upon hearing the clink of a glass being set upon the table. She let the agent pour the milk and he gestured for her to take a seat next to him. She sipped the milk as he watched the monitors, falling into an easy, nearly boring silence. Still, she couldn't relax. If anything, the cold milk made her stomach churn even more. That's when she felt the first tear roll down her cheek. A fat one rolled down the other side, landing in her milk, and suddenly she was fighting back the sobs. She didn't want to cry. She didn't like crying and she didn't want to cry in front of someone. That's what babies did! And Evelyn Rogers was no baby!

"Agent Cartwright? I can take it from here. Why don't you check on Elijah?" Evy could barely see Uncle Phil through her tear-blurred vision. Agent Cartwright squeezed the redhead's shoulder and left her to the care of her uncle.
Phil Coulson took Agent Cartwright's seat.
"What's wrong munchkin?"
"My stomach hurts Uncle Phil," she told him, eyes squinted, willing the tears to stop. The older man knew better than to comment on the child's tears. Instead, he picked up the empty glass.
"Cold milk doesn't really help, does it?"
"No…dad usually warms it, but I forgot ta," she answered, wiping her teary eyes. Sniffling and keeping her head down she kept the sobs at bay. "When's dad gonna come home?" She tried to ask casually, as though every thought in her head wasn't consumed with the whereabouts of her family.
"Soon. They're all going to come home soon."
"Is everybody else going to go soon?"
"Still don't like the agents? I think agent Cartwright was hoping he'd finally be in your good graces."
"He's okay, I guess. I just want dad to come back. I want them all to come back," she ended her sentence barely above a whisper. "Are you gonna leave Uncle Phil?"
"No. I'm not going to leave until your dad gets here himself."
"Promise?"
"Promise."

There were few things Phil Coulson regretted, but that day five years ago would always haunt his nightmares. This time, he handpicked the agents that were the tower's acting sentries. None of these men or women would be compromised. He would ensure that. Regardless, he would never leave her alone with just agents again. If he left, she was coming with him. It didn't matter if he was going headfirst into battle, he wasn't leaving without those two children by his side. He would never make that mistake again. But that didn't save the little girl from living with his mistake throughout the beginning of her life. It got to him; no matter how many agents he could fill the tower with, no matter how long he stayed and no matter how many years after the fact, she still didn't feel safe. She was still scared. Straightening his shoulders, he knew he had to do something-anything to keep her from feeling afraid.
"Your birthday is right around the corner," he started. "Do you know what you want?" Her little form tensed as she nervously avoided the agent's gaze.
"What is it?" Uncle Phil asked with a knowing smile.
"I-"she began. "I really want…" She stayed quiet, wringing her hands. Oh she knew what she wanted. She had known for a long time, but she knew better than to ask. She'd first seen them when she was very young-still allowed to leave the tower with dad on errands. It was in the winter and dad would bundle her up and carry her through the snow. She would stop her dad every time she saw them. He'd let her watch them for a bit, but dad never did like the cold. Now, what she wanted could never happen.
"I didn't catch that."
"Ice skates…"
"Ice skates?" the agent asked and the little girl nodded quickly.
"Just ice skates. No ice to skate on?"
"Well, I thought they kinda went together," she spoke meekly.
"Do you know how to ice skate?"
"Uh well no, but maybe I can learn?" Agent Coulson sat back in his chair, brushing back his graying hairs with his hand."I'd try really hard to learn, Uncle Phil. I promise." She added softly.

Somehow he couldn't deny the redhead her one birthday wish. It would mean a lot of paperwork, coordination of agents, and extra security checks, but if he had to buy out the entire rink to fill it with agents, then that's what he would do. Maybe Phil Coulson couldn't erase her nightmares of the past, but he would make sure she could have a chance at her dreams.
"I'll tell you what," he began. "You read me one of the stories from your reading list and tomorrow I might look into a few of the local rinks-maybe we'll start with an ice show." Her eyes lit up and she jumped into the agent's arms. He would do anything, of course, for his goddaughter.
"Agent Coulson?" Cartwright had appeared at the door, wearing the colander again and looking miffed. To his side, little Elijah Stark stood with arms crossed as he scolded the agent.
"Now we've gotta do it all over again. The data is bad. Now I gotta wait even more!"

AN: I wasn't going to post this one-shot next, but since last week, I'm looking at this chapter a little differently now.