The Art of Throwing Goblets

Merlin walked grumpily through the hallway, carrying the Prat's armor while trying to ignore the ache at the back of his head where the clotpole threw a goblet at. He suddenly stopped in the middle of the hallway as a thought occurred to him.

Had Arthur ever thrown objects at his previous servants? Or was he the only one?

He shrugged, feeling the need to rub the bump that was sure to be on his head, but the stupid armor preventing him from doing it. Maybe he should ask them . . . Or maybe not.

Merlin kept on going, deep in thought as he finally approached his and Gaius's chambers. He looked around, trying to find a certain physician. He grinned when he noticed that Gaius wasn't there, so he quickly went up to his small room, dumping the armor down on the floor. He muttered a couple words and soon enough, the armor started to wash itself, and in a couple minutes it looked as good as new.

He grinned once more and went out to find Arthur's previous servants (see the plural? Rumor has it that Arthur used to fire his servants every couple weeks or so, until Merlin came along. If your lucky, you'd have the job for a month, at least until now).

Merlin peeked his head through the doorway of Morris's (Arthur's previous servant) quarters, who looked slightly annoyed to find Merlin there (he did steal his job). Merlin simply grinned and let himself in.

"What do you want?" Morris grumbled to the cheery manservant.

"I was just wondering . . ." Merlin nervously fiddled around with his fingers.

"Yes?"

"Did Arthur ever throw things at you?"

Morris frowned, "No."

Merlin's shoulders sagged. "I thought not." He said and walked right out the door.

Merlin knocked on Edmund's door (Arthur's servant before Morris) and waited until a scraggly haired man opened it for him. Edmund narrowed his eyes at Merlin, trying to figure out who he was.

"Who are you?" He asked.

"Hi, I'm Merlin. I'm the prince's manservant." Merlin said with his trademark grin.

Recognition dawned on his face.

"I'm just here to ask a question." Merlin continued. "Did Arthur ever throw anything at you?"

Edmund shook his head.

"Of course not." Merlin huffed and walked away.

Merlin was about to knock on the door, when it swung open to reveal a very skinny and frail, brown haired man. Merlin was surprised that the wind hadn't picked the man up and carried him away, he was /that thin. "Uh, hi. I'm Merlin."

The man just raised his eyebrows. "The prince's manservant?"

Merlin nodded.

"I'm Alvin." Alvin said as he shook his hands.

"Nice to meet you Alvin. You see, I'm just here to ask a simple question." Merlin began.

"What is it?"

"Did Arthur throw any objects at you?" Merlin quickly asked.

"No . . ."

"The prat." Merlin muttered angrily and spun on his heels to stomp his way to Arthur's next manservant.

Merlin walked through the lower town, making his way to a certain tavern. He was told that the next unfortunate soul spent his time in the tavern all day (he can understand why Arthur would want to fire him).

Merlin looked around, he approached the first person he saw and asked where a man called Ewart was. The man he asked widened his eyes and pointed a shaky finger toward a very bulky man in the corner who was currently throwing someone in the air.

Merlin gulped and took slow steps toward the man. As he got closer he noticed that the giant man had many warts on his face, which made him look scarier and definitely more ugly.

Ewart's steely eyes found his, and Merlin knew right away that Arthur would /never throw anything at a man like that. So Merlin pretty much scampered out of the tavern in fear and was met with a very angry Arthur (more like, bumped into).

After spending some time in the stocks (curtesy of Arthur), Merlin finally made his way to his chambers. He quickly cleaned himself and basically dumped himself on his cot. Merlin grumbled something about 'inconsiderate prats' and promised to himself that he will continue questioning Arthur's other manservants, 'cause surely, he can't be the only one who gets things thrown at.

Merlin walked through the lower town once more, looking around for a certain house where a manservant called Monet lived. He stopped when he found it and knocked on the door. The door immediately swung open to reveal a pretty blond haired lady.

"Hi, how can I help you?" She asked sounding bored.

"Uh, I'm looking for somebody named Monet?" Merlin asked nervously.

"I'm Monet."

Merlin blinked once, then twice, and thrice. "Um, I think I have the wrong person. I'm was looking for the prince's previous manservant and I was told that his name was Monet."

Monet glared at him. "I was the prince's maidservant." She said with an angry note to her voice.

Merlin stared dumbfounded at her. "Oh." He said still trying to make sense of it. "But . . . um . . . I thought . . . um . . ." Merlin kept muttering nonsense while still trying to figure out why a woman was Arthur's manservant, sorry maidservant.

"I know what you are thinking, but really, it was going to be a temporary thing anyway. And you can imagine why Arthur would want me, won't you?" She then gave him a flirtatious wink, which made Merlin almost gag. Yup, he definitely got why Arthur chose her.

Merlin felt bad in his stomach and he quickly excused himself, then he basically ran to his chambers. Later on he would realize that he forgot to ask the question, but then again, Arthur would never throw anything at a girl.

Merlin walked through the forest, looking for a small hut where the ex-manservant, Harold, lived. He couldn't fathom why anybody would want to live in the forest. Finally, after walking for another half-an-hour, he found the hut.

As soon as Merlin knocked on the door, a puff of purple smoke made its way to the doorway. Sorcery! Merlin stumbled back, while trying to prevent his magic from bursting out. When the smoke disappeared, he was met with a man, probably a little older than him, with grayish-green eyes and ebony hair. The man dramatically stood with his chin up, and one hand on his hip while the other held a very dramatic staff. His cloak/cape billowed in the wind behind him (not that Merlin could feel the wind, probably magic).

"I am Harold, the Great and Powerful!" He said dramatically. "And you have trespassed into my territory!"

"Oh, uh, sorry. I just came here to ask a question. If you're not okay with it, I can just leave." Merlin said, while slowly inching away from the overly dramatic man.

"Halt!" He said, while making a halting motion with his hand. "What have you come to ask the Great and Powerful Harold?"

"Okay, um, were you really Prince Arthur's manservant?" Merlin asked, sounding a bit skeptical (he was a sorcerer after all).

At the mention of Arthur's name, Harold's eyes darkened in anger. "Yes, I was. I was only in his service for two days, and he executed most of my family members, but luckily I managed to escape."

Merlin looked at him with pity. "I'm really sorry about that, you must miss your family a lot."

"Yes," Harold said, with a sinister smile on his face. "I shall get my revenge on him."

Merlin widened his eyes. "Oh, no, no. You shouldn't, revenge isn't the answer."

"What would you know? You're just a boy." He snarled, then muttered a few words and disappeared in a puff of purple smoke.

Merlin just stood there, dumbfounded. "Great! Another sorcerer out to destroy Arthur." He muttered angrily under his breath and walked back to Camelot. "I should really learn how to do a teleportation spell . . ." He trailed off, deep in thought.

A day later, Harold (the Great and Powerful, Ha!) attacked Arthur and once again Merlin had to save the day.

"Has Arthur ever thrown anything at you?" Merlin asked, right before doing the the killing blow.

"Other than arrows, no." Harold said.

Merlin huffed in anger and destroyed the latest threat once and for all.

Later on that week (during the night, might I add), Merlin grumpily did his chores (like making Arthur's bed). He went through ten more of Arthur's manservants and each had very strange talents. Like that Oswald guy, he can put carrots into his nose. There's that other guy, Perry, who was a secret assassin. Or that other one, Fred, his voice is so high pitched and he talks a hundred miles an hour. Then there's Puck, don't even ask, he's the weirdest one of all.

But there are also those that are actually kinda normal, they got fired for the most weirdest things (like for wearing a red shirt). The important thing is, that Arthur never threw anything at them. Which made Merlin angrier and angrier, trust me, you don't want to talk to an angry Merlin.

"Merlin, what the hell is wrong with you?" The Royal prat demanded.

"Nothing, sire." Merlin called back while picking up a shirt that was sprawled on the floor.

"You didn't even say anything the whole day."

"Shouldn't that make you happy?" Merlin shot back.

"You should be blabbering about nonsense by now. This is not you. Who are you and what did you do to Merlin?" Arthur said while narrowing his eyes at his strangely quiet manservant.

Merlin just shrugged and picked up another trouser on the floor. Merlin's back was facing Arthur, so he didn't notice him taking a goblet in his hands and throwing it at the unsuspecting manservant.

The goblet hit his shoulder, Merlin stopped mid stride to the cabinet. He kept on walking and just threw the trouser in the cabinet. Then he turned his gaze at the prince.

Arthur would never admit it, but Merlin looked scary at that moment. And when he saw Merlin grab that goblet he just threw, he knew that things were getting serious.

A/N: This story is just a plot bunny that came up to me in the middle of the night. I just had to write the idea, even if it isn't really that interesting. Anyways, thanks for reading! Please review and tell me what you think of it! Thank You!