As much as he cherishes this letter of Shouyou's, Gintoki doesn't read it every year— more like once every few. God no, not every year. Reopening that wound so often would be too much. This year has proven to be a particularly trying one though. So here he is, slicing down that big, ugly scar with a rusty blade for the second time. People may call him a sadist, but deep down, he's really a masochist.

He folds the pages into fourths and tucks them in his shirt. He'll give the letter back to Otose tomorrow to keep with the schoolbook and sword. She's the only person he'll ever trust with those things.

"GIN-CHAN, YOU RAUNCHY OLD FART!" Kagura charges into the office like a bull seeing red, hurdles over his desk, and plows into him and his chair. "DON'T LOOK!"

"OI! YOU CRAZY BRAT! THAT FUCKING HURT!"

Her small hands shoot to cover his mouth, nose, and eyes. He's going to suffocating to death as this little monster chitters away on top of him without a care in the world. Over the blood pounding in his ears, he can just make out her squeaky voice reporting, "Shinpachi and Zura told me to distract you while they get everything ready!"

"Kagura! That's not distracting Gin-san! That's spilling the beans to him!"

"Leader, no! It's not Zura; it's Katsura!"

"Oops. Sorry."

Kagura removes her hands, and Gintoki wheezes a breath in only to cough it back out violently. Damn! His head had slammed into the floor, and he's pretty sure he has a mild concussion— everything's spinning. He shakily hauls himself up by his desk to see Shinpachi and Katsura on the other side of it. They both have stupid birthday hats on, and each is supporting a half of a cake on a tray. He then turns to look at Kagura who's chewing on the end a noisemaker. She meets his eyes and blows it his face with an obnoxious toot.

"Happy twenty-something birthday, Gin-chan!"

"Happy twenty-something birthday!" Shinpachi and Katsura parrot.

"Oh, and Gin-chan! The old hag, the sex robot, and the illegal immigrant are all closing up shop right now! They should be here real soon!"

So these assholes had remembered! He thought they had forgotten! Admittedly, he was playing mind games this morning by pretending it was only another day... but who cares! They had really been planning something for him all along!

His chest starts to swell, and he flashes a happy, crooked grin. However, the other three people in the room seem apprehensive at his smile. Gintoki quickly bites it back, forcing himself to scowl.

He follows through with his dour act. Walking around the desk, and snagging Kagura on the way by the wrist, he snaps, "Those useless broads better be bringing me some damn good booze and plenty of it too. You two virgins put down that cake somewhere."

He watches in muted glee as Shinpachi and Katsura seethe over with rage. In perfect sync, they swing the cake back to slingshot at his face.

"Ey! Don't you dare! It's my birthday, and that means I can verbally abuse you shits as much as I want to today!" He snatches the cake away from them. "And don't waste a perfectly good sweet, you brutes!"

He sets the white cake with its multicolored assortment of candles on the coffee table and admires its charming simplicity. All sweets are beautiful to him, but hmm… there's… twenty-five candles on the cake?

"Twenty-five? You always put twenty-five candles on Gin-san's cake. He may seem eternally young and strapping, but his balls sag each year like any other mortal man."

"Actually Gin-san, we just go with twenty-five because it's a catchall number. We only know that you're in your twenties. Not even Katsura-san knows your real age. You should tell us it so we can get the number of candles right."

"Yeah, Gin-chan! Not even Zura knows how old you are! How freakin' dumb do you have to be to not know your own age? Oi, Shinpachi! He's gotta be older than his twenties. He's already going senile!"

"It's not Zura; it's Katsura."

Gintoki initially cackles at his kids' discontent, but it's Katsura peace that kills his laughter. It's not so much the statement or Katsura's tone of voice that unnerves him, but rather it's the look in his eyes.

"That's right, Gintoki. Even when we were children, your age would change every few years. I still don't know whether you're truly younger or older than me."

He's at a loss as Katsura's hazel eyes flash with a piercing awareness. His heart drops into his stomach and everything churns. Has Zura finally figured it out?

"No matter," Katsura swiftly retracts, appearing pleased with himself. "A wish is to be made! Who has the matches?"

Gintoki pounces on this generous exit. Whatever had just happened, it's a conversation for another day. "Yeah, you gaggle 'a ugly songbirds! I want to hear some decent squawkin' coming outta your loud beaks."

His arm is around Shinpachi, and Katsura has his hands on Kagura's shoulders as they all—very badly—sing him happy birthday. (The three other broads are late. Eh, okay. Gintoki's being impatient because there's cake.) Never has he ever been worried about so much before, but then again, his life isn't just his alone anymore. It's something that's to be enjoyed, to be shared with everyone else, and he wouldn't have it any other way.

End Notes: I know I took my headcanons and ran with them, but I really hope you enjoyed reading this! I loved writing it!