Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own anything.

AN1: So this started as an idea about Alex Cabot and Rafael Barba being old friends, I had many different ideas and then this one came to be.

This has past and potentially future Alex/Olivia but the focus is the friendship, the history and the relationship between Alex Cabot and Rafael Barba.

I'm on chapter seven and there is at least one flashback a chapter so far, though in recent chapters that has gone up to two so if there is any events that you want to see let me know and I'll try to work them in.

"Are you sure you have to go already?" Olivia asks Barba about an hour after the two of them, Lucy, Fin, Rollins, Amaro, and Carisi toasted to family.

"Yeah, there's something I have to do." Barba responds as he puts on his coat.

"Is everything okay?" Olivia asks, not being able to help but being concerned as until he looked at his phone it seemed like Barba was having a good time.

"Of course. I'll see you later, Olivia." Barba says before leaving.

"See you later." Olivia asks as the door closes behind Barba, not being able to help but feel that something else is going on.

Five minutes later Barba is in a cab on the way to near the apartment where his best friend, the person who is basically his sister, Alex Cabot, is hiding out.

Eighteen months ago Barba received call from Alex. The call was the first time Barba had heard from his best friend in about a year, since after he started working as SVU's ADA. It was about six months before the last time they spoke that Alex said that she needed a fresh start, one of her own choosing, and left New York. As soon as Barba heard Alex's voice he knew that something was horribly wrong, something which was confirmed when he went to Philadelphia to see her.

Memory; Philadelphia, 18 months earlier (November 30th 2013)

After he got a call from Alex Barba has drove out to Philadelphia to meet Alex at a diner. When he arrived at the diner Barba spotted Alex and he walked over to her and even though he was worried about what he would find during the drive nothing could have prepared him for what he saw.

"Lexie." Barba said shocked as he saw Alex covered in fresh cuts and bruises, "What happened?" he asked as he slid into the booth across from her.

"Hey, Rafi, thanks for coming." Alex responded having noticeably tensed as Barba approached.

"You don't have to thank me, Lexie. What happened?" Barba asked his voice serious as he could have guessed what happened, but he wanted Alex to admit it.

"I thought things were okay." Alex admitted, "I was doing okay and I finally started to see someone. I thought they were a good person. His name is Felix Torres, I thought he was a good man, I thought that he was perfect for me. For a while I truly believed that maybe we could have a future together" Alex explained. Even though Barba wanted to interrupt her he didn't as his experience with SVU told him not, it told him to just let Alex talk, "After we had been dating a few weeks things started to change. He wanted to know where I was all the time, what I was doing, who I was talking to." Alex explained.

"Is that why you stopped returning my calls?" Barba asked, feeling guilt about that as he felt like he should have known that something was wrong when Alex stopped returning his calls, but he just thought that Alex was finally getting settled within her new life, that she needed a clean break; something that he understood considering everything Alex had been through.

"Yes, he didn't like it when I talked to someone other than him. He wanted to control everything, especially me" Alex admitted, not looking Barba in the eye on purpose.

"When did he start hurting you?" Barba asked, as he had no question as to what happened, not that he had much of one to begin with, having done his best to keep the fury that he was feeling out of his voice.

"Physically, after we moved in together; about six months ago." Alex explained.

"You moved in together?" Barba asks surprised by that as the Alex he's known since they were eighteen wouldn't have moved in with someone so controlling, and he knew enough to know that Alex only mentioning physically hurting means that there was other kinds of hurting that started earlier.

"Yeah, he convinced me, I thought we were in love, and I had another reason." Alex said, having been vague on purpose, "At first it was just a few hits; some minor bruises and cuts."

"But it got worse."

"It was never as bad as this, just some minor injuries, and he always apologised after." Alex said.

"They always do. You know that." Barba said, having done his best to sound calm and comforting even though he was angry and upset about his best friend being hurt.

"This morning when he was leaving to go on a ten day business trip he found that I'm supposed to be spending most of the next week working with another lawyer. Guess he didn't want that." Alex admitted, having continued to avoid looking at Barba in the eyes, as she knew that the reason why Felix left visible marks for the first time was to try force her not to go into work.

"Have you called the police?"

"No. and I can't."

"Lexie you have to, for yourself. You've worked SVU you know that once someone does something like this they only escalate, you could, and likely will, end up dead, Lexie." Barba said being harsh and serious, though supportive, as he wanted Alex to understand, because he couldn't see how she wouldn't call the police after everything she's seen, everything she knows.

"I know." Alex said, "I'm not staying with him Rafi, but I can't call the police and I definitely can't tell Olivia, she has enough going on without adding this to what she is dealing with." Alex said, having suspected that Barba was going to suggest that next, which he was, and knowing about the Lewis trial as even in Philadelphia it had been on the news.

"Why can't you go to the police?"

"Because I'm seven months pregnant." Alex said to Barba's surprise, as the table and jacket she was wearing hid her stomach, "If I go to the police he will fight for his parental rights, even if it's just to hurt me, and he has the resources and connections to win; not just a custody battle, but everything. I don't want my child to have anything to do with this bastard." Alex explains as that is the biggest reason why she doesn't want to go to the police, though she does have other reasons.

"That's, wow." Barba said, having not been sure what else to say.

"I need help Rafi, but I'm not going to the police." Alex said, her stubbornness having shown itself "I would understand if you didn't want to help because of that."

"Of course I'm going to help Lexie, don't even start" Barba said, as there was never a question about whether he would have helped, "I'm guessing that along with Olivia you don't want Fin, Cragen or Munch to know either." He realised.

"No I don't."

"Okay, then they won't hear anything from me." Barba promised, "Even though you don't want to call the police we should take pictures of everything he did. So that you have proof if needed." Barba said and Alex looked very hesitant "It's an insurance policy Lexie, for your own protection, you know that."

"Okay, we'll take pictures." Alex said, having thought of something else that she wanted to get Barba's opinion on once they were somewhere safe.

"Good." Barba said, "Have you eaten?" he asked and Alex shook her head in response.

"Then we're going to have lunch, then you're going to go write me a list off everything you want from the apartment and where to find it all and I'll go get it. While I'm doing that how would you feel about staying at a hotel?"

"I'd be okay with that." Alex said, a nervousness to her voice, as even though she knew that he was out of town Alex couldn't help but worry that Torres would find her.

"Good. It will be okay, Lexie." Barba said as he reached out and grabbed Alex's hand, an action which she tensed at. As he saw the look of fear on Alex's face Barba decided to wait until after lunch to convince Alex to go to a doctor.

About half an hour after he left Olivia's apartment Barba gets the cab to pull over so that he can walk the last few blocks to where Alex is.

After being as careful as possible to make sure that he was followed, including putting his phone on airplane mode and turning off GPS, Barba arrives at the building is and he is surprised when he sees who the door person is.

"Isn't it a bit early for you, Louise." Barba can't help but comment as the doorperson is the usual night person and its several hours before Louise usually starts.

"Yeah, Donavon got sick. He had to go home." Louise a tall dark haired woman says.

"Does that mean that the door was unattended?" Barba asks, not being able to help his worry about what that could mean.

"Yeah, I just got here it was unintended for about an hour." Louise responds, and before she can even say any more Barba is running upstairs.

Deciding to skip the elevator Barba runs up the stairs and as he does he can't help but worry about what could have happened to Alex with no door person. As soon as he reaches the hallway where Alex's apartment is Barba's worry is confirmed when he sees Alex's apartment door wide open, something which it never is as Alex always has the door locked, and most of the time she has at least one chain on as well.

"LEXIE." Barba calls worried as he rushes into the apartment. Even with his fears, everything he has seen in the job and the way Alex was when he first saw her eighteen months ago nothing could have prepared Barba for the sight that greats him.

Alex is lying in the middle of the living room, with no bottoms on and ripped shirt and bra, bruised and bloody, her glasses lying broken on the ground, a bloody knife lying next to her, a trashed apartment and blood, all around her, a window open, with a tarp next to it, and a toddler girl right next to her crying and having some blood on her.

"Tío Rafi." The toddler says as she sees him.

"Lexie, Ella." Barba says rushing over to Alex and the little girl. Once he is next to her the first thing Barba does is check to make sure that Alex is still alive which to Barba's complete relief she is, and the second thing he does is picks up the little girl while he pulls out his phone, turns airplane mode back on an re activates GPS, and dials 911 while he tries to do something to comfort the crying sixteen month old. "This is Assistant District Attorney Rafael Barba, I need a bus. A woman has been attacked, she's bleeding, has a head wound, is unconscious, and has been left partially naked and has possibly been raped." Barba says, panic clear in his voice.

"What's the address?" The operator asks and Barba gives it, "The paramedics and police are on their way." The operator responds.

"Good." Barba says before hanging up, "Hold on Lexie, please hold on." Barba almost begs as he dials Olivia's number.

"Mommy." Ella says as Barba continues to try and comfort the scared and upset toddler that he is holding, having no idea whether what he is doing is helping.

"So how does it feel now that things are official?" Rollins asks Olivia curious.

"Amazing." Olivia says with a grin as her phone starts to ring, "Really, you just left." Olivia says annoyed before she answers her phone, "Hello."

"Liv. I should have realised that something like this would happen, I knew there was a chance. I should have convinced her to go the police, to go to you, but she refused and I couldn't get her to change her mind. This would have never happened if I could have convinced her to report it." Barba says, speaking so fast that Olivia can barely understand what he is saying.

"Barba, slow down. What wouldn't have happened?" Olivia asks confused, "Who's she? What's going on?" she asks, causing everyone to look at her.

"Lexie, she's been attacked…" Barba says, but before he can say anymore Olivia has cut him office.

"What! Alex? Where are you?" Olivia asks, not being able to help her panic as she knows that for Barba to seem as rattled as he is then things must be bad, "Is that a baby?" Olivia asks shocked as he hears cries.

"Yeah, Lexie. It's bad." Barba says before giving Olivia the address, "And yes, that's Ella, Lexie's daughter."

"I'll be right there." Olivia says before hanging up, forcing herself not to focus on the fact that Alex has a daughter as it seems like there is a bigger problem.

"Cabot?" Fin asks as there is only one Alex that he knows of that could cause Olivia to be so rattled.

"Yeah." Olivia answers, it being clear that she is worried, "Do you mind watching Noah?" she asks Lucy.

"Not at all." Lucy says as Olivia hands her son over giving her son a kiss on the head.

"Since when do Barba and Cabot know each other?" Fin asks confused as he never knew that.

"Since College. They went to College together and were roommates in Law School and for a time after." Olivia explains, too everyone except for Carisi's surprise, as she puts her jacket on.

"And how long have you known that for?" Fin asks surprised as Olivia has given no indication that she knew that Barba and Alex had history, there was no indication that they had a history, although now that he thinks about it Fin realises that Alex used to always talk about 'her best friend Rafi.' But because she never said more than that about who he was he didn't put it together when Barba started working with them.

"Fourteen years, give or take." Olivia says as she hurries out of the apartment. Rollins, Amaro, Fin and Carisi right behind her.

Fifteen minutes later Olivia, Fin, Carisi, Rollins and Amaro are on their way to the address that Barba gave, Olivia and Fin are in one car while Carisi, Rollins and Amaro is in another.

"Did you know Cabot was back?" Fin asks Olivia from the passenger seat as they speed through the streets with the car's lights and sirens on.

"No. As far as I knew she was still gone." Olivia admits.

"So the last time you saw each other was when you said goodbye before she left?" Fin asks curious as after Alex's last case with the unit the 'old' squad, including Huang who was still in town at his conference, went out together to say goodbye to Alex before she left, and goodbye to Huang before he went back to Oklahoma.

"When she said she needed a fresh start, yeah." Olivia confirms, as after spending several hours with Fin, Munch, Cragen, Huang, and Melinda she and Alex said goodbye privately, parting on good terms, "We've talked a couple of times though." Olivia admits as when Alex first left they talked regularly but within six months they lost touch, "You're going to have to run point on this." Olivia says, knowing that whatever happened is their case as she already got the call from dispatch, "I can't, not with our history."

"I know." Fin says, "What can I tell Rollins, Amaro and Carisi?" Fin asks.

"Tell them the truth, the might need to know."

"You got it." Fin says.

Not even fifteen minutes later they arrive at the address that Barba gave and as they did the see Alex being loaded into an ambulance and Barba rushing right next to her holding a little, blond, girl.

"Barba, how bad is it?" Olivia ask as she and the others rush over to him.

"Bad. She was unconscious when I found her, all her clothes were either ripped or missing. Blood was everywhere, her glasses were broken, and she's got a head wound." Barba explains as he tries to comfort the toddler he is holding, honestly being not sure what to do.

"Mommy." Ella repeats, "Tío Rafi, Mommy?" Ella says, repeating the only three words she has been saying since Barba picked her up.

"The girl needs to be checked out too." One of the EMT's tells Barba.

"I know." Barba says, "It's okay, Pequeña. it's okay, Ella." Barba says as he climbs into the ambulance.

"If anyone else is riding with us then you should get in, we have to go." One of the EMT's says.

"I'll come." Olivia says, "Check the scene, talk to witness, the usual. Once you're done there, Rollins come to the hospital and take Barba's statement because I can't." Olivia explains.

"Why not?" Rollins asks confused.

"History. Fin will explain." Olivia says as she too climbs into the ambulance.

"History? What does that mean?" Amaro asks Fin, curious, figuring that if anyone knows then it would be Fin.

"I'll explain when there are fewer people around." Fin says, "Come on." He says heading towards the building and Rollins, Carisi and Amaro follow behind.

"Is she hurt?" Olivia asks as she is sitting right next to Barba who is still holding a crying toddler, who is clutching a small brown bear.

"I don't think so." Barba admits, "But she won't calm down, she probably saw the whole thing, saw everything that he did to her." Barba explains, completely out of his depth on what to do to calm Ella down as even though, after Alex, he is the person who has spent the most time with Ella he still isn't the greatest with kids.

"Do you mind if I try?" Olivia asks, being able to see how out of his depth Barba is.

"Not at all." Barba says as he hands Ella to Olivia.

"Hey, Ella?" Olivia asks, wanting to get her name right and Barba nods, "Shhh. It's okay, Ella. It's okay sweetie." Olivia says, doing her best to comfort the toddler.

"There are three locks on the door, and a chain." Amaro notices, "That's a bit much for this neighbourhood. Cabot was obviously scared of someone." He says.

"Are they in tack?" Rollins asks.

"Nope all broken." Amaro says with a frown as he balances on his crutches.

"I don't get it, whose place is this?" Carisi asks confused as they inspect the apartment.

"Alex Cabot. She used to be our ADA." Fin explains.

"What happened?" Carisi asks, "Why isn't she your ADA anymore?"

"That, is a very long story." Fin says as honestly it really is.

"Wait. Is this the Alex Cabot? Aka the ADA who had to go into witness protection because of her determination to prosecute a drug lord?" Carisi says shocked as he thought the name sounded familiar as he's heard about Alex Cabot in his law classes.

"Cabot was in Witness Protection?" Rollins asks shocked as she never knew that.

"Yes she was." Fin confirms, not surprised that Rollins didn't know that as it wasn't mentioned when Alex was working with them, "She was shot during a case, it was an attempted hit. For a while almost everyone thought she was dead." He explains.

"Wow." Amaro comments, "What's the history that prevents Liv from taking Barba's statement?" he asks curious.

Looking around the room Fin realises that one of the bedrooms seems to be empty.

"With me." Fin says and Rollins, Amaro and Carisi follows him inside, exchanging looks as they do, where all four of them are in the room Fin closes the door behind them, "What I'm about to say stays in this room unless it comes up during the investigation." He informs everyone giving them all a stern look before he continues, "From a couple of months after Alex was assigned as SVU's ADA to when Alex went into witness protection and when Alex was once more assigned as SVU's ADA years later, both times, Alex and Olivia were together." Fin explains.

"They were a couple?" Amaro asks shocked.

"Yes, and very much in love." Fin confirms to the three junior detective's shock.

Twenty minutes after they left Alex's apartment the ambulance that Barba and Olivia are in with Alex arrives at the hospital.

"What have we got?" The nurses and doctors ask.

"Alexandra Cabot, forty two year old female, attacked in her apartment, beaten, possibility sexually assaulted." One of the paramedics says, "Vitals are low and there are multiple injuries."

"Her sixteen month old daughter was also present it's unclear if she has been hurt." The other paramedic says.

"Is this her?" One of the nurses asks Barba.

"Yeah." Barba says as the nurse takes Ella and places her on another stretcher.

"What's her name and date of birth?" The nurse who took Ella asks, "What's her medical history?"

"Rafaela Oliva Cabot, born January 14th 2014." Barba answers to Olivia's shock, "She is up to date on all immunisations and checks ups; she also has a clear medical history with the exception of a broken rib that she suffered in-utero when her mother was attacked while pregnant." Barba answers, once more surprising Olivia who has a feeling that what happened today was only the tip of the ice burg. Even though Alex was moving constantly she made sure that Ella got the medical care she needed, even if she couldn't take her herself.

"And you are?" The nurse asks.

"Family friend. I have guardianship over Ella while her mother is unable to look after her, and I have the legal power and authority to make medical decisions for the both of them while they can't." Barba informs the medical personnel as that was something that he and Alex arranged as soon as they got back to New York after they left Philadelphia.

"Okay. Then you should come with us. It will help Ella to have familiar face." The nurse says, causing Barba to look at Alex who is being pushed on a different stretcher.

"I'll stay with Alex, Ella needs you." Olivia promises as she would be happy to stay with Ella, but she is a stranger. It would be better for her to have Barba. Barba nods in response and he follows Ella in one direction while Olivia follows Alex who goes in another, both Olivia and Barba hoping more than anything that both Cabot's will be okay.