Wave inn

I am looking forward to meeting. When did I started to think like that? Maybe when I was still young, cute child. Every single things such as waiting for the mother who is not coming for me, or meeting unfamiliar people holding my sister's hand have fluttered my heart.

And when did I gave up all the expectations like that? Maybe when I got into elementary school, or when my mother stopped reading me fairy tales, which I had just few of them. Only that I ambiguously realized when I grew up, that actually nobody cared about me at all. I didn't realized the fact that I am nothing more than lonely island because I was too young. Loneliness in the crowds, alone in the family. I have never wanted it, and no one excluded me in intension. I myself was just an entity like a lonely island, which keep waiting for someone to come for me.

I cannot say there was no visitors at all. There were morons who merely swiped through me on their boat, or those who tried to hurt me shooting their cannons. Unlike them, there were also kind people who attempted to anchor their ship in my tiny harbor. And there was one traveler, who actually stayed in my island and protected me.

I felt my heart is thrilling. Although I am not sure that sentence can express my actual feeling perfectly. This thrill was also a fear to me, unlike other ordinary fluttering that comes with happiness. I always misunderstood the true intension of people, as I use to rely on and expected on others, like a fool. That's why I cannot just enjoy this happiness, since he, the one who I am just about to meet again, is also use to do the same.

"… phew."

The inside of airport was little chill, to be a winter. Winter here was not as cold as one of japan, yet I am a kind of person who is sensitive on coldness. I found an empty seat nearby and sit on it while rubbing hands together, exhaling white steam. I think I was not as sensitive on temperature as this at the past. It was after I become 20 years old, when I arrived this London, I began to feel it more severely. Perhaps it was because I am lonely, I thought.

It does not requires much care on makeups and fashions here, where everyone respects others private life. So I may got here with my usual comfortable clothes and light sneakers, but not today. I felt an unfamiliar uncomfortableness from the winter one-piece dress and heeled boots. Did I wore something too much? Will he say I am pretty? My thoughts are wondering as I fidgeting with muffler around my neck.

Noisy sounds of the wheels of carrier bags and busy foots were coming from the gate. I took a deep breath and stand up, tensed up. The gate was throwing out people slowly. I approached to it making ticking sound from my shoes.

"hey-"

As I was looking around to search him, a voice that is rough yet not too loud came from my side. I see Hikigaya, waving his hand to me when I turn to the direction. Then I started to walk towards him, fast enough. Am I walking too indecent? I twisted foots as I came to think such things. I slowly approached to him, my arms crossed and glaring into his eyes to hide my embarrassment.

He looks different from the past, as he stares me unfriendly without smile. Although it has been only two years, he got taller than before. Maybe he even have wider shoulders and build up his body a bit. Definitely he as just as tall as me last time we met. Perhaps I got irritated to that facts. I spoked to him, who should be tired of travel, with icy coldness.

"oh, it was Hikigaya. I thought it was some huge, disgusting pest waving its legs."

"I am not mister Zamza in Germany. I should have cried out if I heard such scorn from Komachi."

"…It is unexpected that you even read such unexpected kind of books."

He laid down a bag from his shoulder as he grumbling like, why you are saying 'unexpected' twice. I wondered what kind of stuff he brought, as the bag looks so heavy. He moved his eyes to my foot, after briefly glimpse through my face which was probably looks like absent-minded.

"You are wearing heeled boots? It must be far to get here. Isn't it painful?"

"… I, I had other business to do before this, which required it. It wasn't you who made me wear this."

"But that sounds like you put that on because of me, ouch, hey, stop, stop stepping on my feet. Sorry, I'm sorry."

Then I stopped trampling on his shoes with my heel. It was so much cold, yet my face became burning red. He certainly became quick-witted and quite sly compare to the past, which I often realized when we talk on the phone sometimes.

I started to walk ahead after gave him a look. He approached and start walking next to me, although I could hear his grumbling from the back. I supposed he was not used to walk next to someone. But now, he was moaning under heavy bag, staying next to me naturally.

By the way, he should have brought more bags or carrier if he supposed to stay about a week here. I asked indifferently without looking at him.

"You don't have much load. You already sent other packages to your place?"

"…No, this is all."

"What? I thought you said you are going to stay a week."

"That's what I said."

I pressed my forehead softly as I started to feel little headache. I could not believe that be brought such a simple stuffs even though he have not been the place to stay… I guess that's because it is the first time he went abroad. I glared at him. He was staring at me, somehow smiling, and averted his eyes from mine as if he don't know anything. I chased that eyes and kept asking.

"Where are you going to stay?"

"I haven't decided yet."

"…Are you going to sleep on the pavement?"

"I am too sensitive to do that… I thought there must be some place."

He said that after making few intended coughs, which seems that he is implying something indirectly. I had to evade from his eyes, which make mw too embarrassed. But, that caused me to twist my foot once again. Hikigaya softly hold my arms as he sighed.

"…Thank you."

"You can rely more on me. So why did you chose that boots… "

He was grumbling and staring straight to the front, as if he is doing nothing while holding my arms firmly. Yet I could see his face became a bit stiffed, which is probably because of embarrassment. How mean you are, that I am the one who should be embarrassed with such act you do to me.

Stepping inside through the opened door. I took off my shoes and put them on the rack at the side, before ordering him who was wandering, don't know what to do with his shoes on. I took out slippers which I usually use, and gave him another pair I recently bought for male. He shyly shook his head and put on those slippers. Then he stepped inside of the house, looking around here and there.

"….Ohh, I thought foreign people always were their shoes in house. The floor is even warm here."

"I sought for this kind of particular house. Other houses around this are probably same. It is not that close to the downtown, so the ambient is nice as well."

"Then it should be Zone 4, as it was quite far from the city center."

He murmured at admiration. The area is divided into 6 zones around the downtown, so Zone 2 and 3 was the ideal place to go to the school I attend. It requires me to buy expensive public transit pass in this Zone 4 to get to school. I ask him how he has knowledge about the division of areas.

"…You knows it quite well,"

"Ah? … well, I do. That kind of things are common sense to this Hiki-pedia."

I sit down on couch, glaring at him who is saying disgusting things. Despite of my calm responses and talk, I was actually tensed. It is certainly heart pounding to meet someone who I loved after 2 years of gap, and that he is going to stay in my house for a week. I feel shamed as he look around every places of my house, as my embarrassing parts are being revealed. He is still checking inside of the house, muttering.

"What a rich girl. How come did your parents decided to leave their daughter to stay this kind of huge house, alone?"

"…They wanted me to go to school residence at first. I insisted to come to this house, which was my intension. And actually, this one is smaller than other houses around here."

"It's too broad for one person to live. Like, how would you do your cleanings?"

"… I don't know. Can you please stop asking weird things? This country guarantees our right of privacy, which means I can call the police for what you just said."

Hikigaya showed astonished face to me for a moment and made his way to the room I assigned him. He must be unpacking his stuffs. There is no problem for it, since this house has plenty enough vacant room for him to sleep. What bothered me was the situation that I have to live with him for a week, and his attitude which is too natural. It seems like he was preparing everything for this, as if he knew it beforehand.

As I said, it has been 2 years since I met him last time because I went to England right after I graduated High school. I was forced to study abroad, by my mother who did not preferred relationships around me. She didn't like me to get along with Yuigahama and Hikigaya. I still cannot understand why, but I just assume she hated me to become uncontrollable as she want.

It was part of my resistance that I refused to go into school residence and to have servants or any other people in my family with me. I wanted to have freedom to contact with them, although I cannot meet them. It was possible for me to stay in this house thanks to my father, while my mother hold out obstinately against it. Often some members of my family visits here and ask how am I doing, yet they does not restrict my action or observed me as they also understands my situation with my mother.

Suddenly Hikigaya threw himself into the couch, he seems to finish unpacking his bags. I shirked a bit, wondering my shoulder might touch his. He laid back on the coach, his eyes closed and saying nothing. He should have been tired during long flight.

I stare at his face calmly. Skin got a bit harsher, and eyes are spoiled as usual. But his cheek and shape of the face became more masculine, which were once fresh as boy. His hands are now so big and thick, that his palm may be able to cover my whole hand. I thought his voice have not changed since I kept hearing it through our frequent phone call, but actual voice became much more gentle and soft. All those small changes make my heart pumping, while it is resentful to see him became so handsome.

My hand unconsciously touched his face. It was rough as I could see, but still I can feel softness. It was comfortable, as I haven't felt other person's skin for a long time. His lip flinched a bit, like he noticed my touch but he didn't open his eyes. He must be pretending he didn't realized it. I could not help myself to jump into his arms, thinking I will be like a baby as much I want since he behaves like he didn't care.

Longing voice and the scenes kept ringing in my head. It feels like I can touch the warmth of that person, which I use to do in Japan. The memory of that day, when I cried in the arms of Yuigahama and Hikigaya is also lingering in my mine. Those voices of them, of that day, kept tickled my ears like I am dreaming. Am I dreaming now? Probably not. Because the warmth I feel from my side is the heat of person, not from a blanket.

"Um… Ahh.."

A low moan came from the side. The shoulders I have been resting in flinched a bit. I also turned little with that movement. I just rubbed into his arms for the drowsy warmth and the heart, forgetting that I was already in his arms.

"….Umm, Lets, just get up now."

I could not even realized my state until he spoke out his words in sentence. Why is he moving. I want him to hug me more. I squeezed my arms around him, following such emotions. That make his arms to wriggle around. Then I noticed that I was holding him to tight, so he cannot move a bit. I opened my eyes, staring at him. He was still pretending indifference, glancing me with narrow eyes. It made me much more embarrassed as he pretended like just awake from sleep, yawning intentionally.

I quickly got off from him and sat straightly on the couch. He smiled brightly after the stood up with big stretch, looking over me.

"…Well, Yukinoshita. Let me look around here."

"Are you sure you are fine with this place? There are much better places for you to visit in this England for sightseeing."

"No, thanks. Maybe later. It is enough for today."

He answered with refreshing smile. The street of Wood Green was quite as it was weekdays. It use to have traffics that going to Tottenham, although it location itself is not on the busy place. Under the heavily clouded sky, we walked through dozen streets which were sparsely placed. After about ten minutes of walk, we arrived at a big park.

"It's different from the parks of japan. The grass is somewhat soft, and not many people around."

"…Because it is morning of weekdays. There is another bigger park down there, but this one is what I prefer. There are too many people there."

"I am also getting to like this place."

I approached and took out a lunchbox to him, who was sitting on the soft grass.

"When did you prepared it? I could not see you are making it while ago."

"…before I meet you in airport. Th, the food out there is only imbalanced and not tasty. You should enjoy this kind of rare opportunity to travel abroad."

Hikigaya opened the box and started to try this and that, showing slight admiration. I also started to eat mine, staring the thin, gray clouds above. It was the first time for me to come to this park with someone else. Once, one of my family's member who came to my place asked me to visit here together, but I refused to. I thought over that words, 'first time', which made me blush again.

My eyes met with his, when I glanced at his side. I averted my sight to the box and pretended to keep eating the foods, but I could feel he was still gazing at me. Is he really still staring at me? As I slightly glimpsed at him, wondering things like that, I could see he was looking at me with blushed face. I turned my face away again, hearing his sly voice.

"…You can just look at me. We already know each other's mind."

"N,No I don't. I have never said anything yet."

"…Then you want to hear the record of our phone call?"

"You, you want to be accused for violating privacy? I never thought you were recording calls of a person. Police will not forgive you this time."

"It was call with me… When did your memory of conversation with me became your dark memory?"

Humph. I turned my back to him. He started to poke on my back as if he was confused, but I didn't turn back. I didn't want to show him my face, which probably out of my normal, burning red. It reminds me the day I canceled date with him due to the freckles under my eyes, as I could not sleep the night before with the tension. So my face now must be as bad as that day…

Speaking over the phone with him was the happiness of my day during the lonely life in this foreign land. I never wanted to have close relationship with anyone, as I was sick of this forced exile. So I relied on him, keeping contact. A desperate thought that we may not be able to see each other again made me confess everything, including my love towards him and even dirtiest emotions I had. All the true feelings and thoughts suppressed by shyness at the past flooded out from my heart, as the ardent feeling of him being too far away from me broke my brake of mind at that time.

He also pelted his honest feelings to me, guess he was as lonely as I did. I was able to hear every impression, disgust, love, painfulness of being helpless, and repulsive emotions he had on me. We were too young to get over the temptation and deepening felling between us. Our conversation got more frequent, from once a month to once a week, 4 days. We have relied on each other, being dependent as illness. I thought that relationship was composed with discharging painful, dirty, and dark desires only.

That kind of thoughts about our relationship, which made me depressed and frustrated, have changed at the end-of semester party last year. At the moment when one of my classmate came to my, saying 'you have such an honest smile.' I was reminded conversations with Hikigaya. I thought maybe this unfortunate relationship, which seemed expanding our agony, can be our first step towards a 'relationship we share our belief' which will bring us back to our normal life. As I heard his life was also changed positively like mine, I was so happy.

"Hey, why are you angry on the things we already talked about everything? What, like I am kind of returning student after he took a time off, who get bothered on every minor things?"

"… Ye, Yes. That time was just that times. Isn't it natural to begin everything again as we meet again?"

That's why I become so embarrassed dealing with him, who is being so confident. Because I have started that relationship from the desperate sadness, that I cannot see him ever again. I even felt slight fear when he decided to visit here, all of a sudden. My brain was bombarded at that days, by the excitement of meeting again and the fear that our relationship based on our separation might be scattered away.

He looked at me, frowned.

"That means I have to begin with saying 'I love you' all the way back… OK, I have a favor. Tell me you love me."

"What a direct pervert. No. You, you was the one who said that first when we were on the phone. So you do it first."

"I always keep my belief, so lady first."

Although he kept on saying silly things like 'what about deciding it by dual!', my ears almost didn't catch them. Because one of my wishes I have desired for long time, just have been granted.

Hikigaya went to bed right after we finished our dinner. He should have hang along with me despite of the tiredness from the long trip. I let him sleep in my room, which has better bed, from the sense of sorry. Yet, I was ashamed when he lied on my bed without any hesitation. But I would never forget the relief and strange happiness when I saw his sleeping face.

I took a sip from the black tea I brewed for him. Its eight p.m. now. My heart is getting calm from the excitement of reunion. My mind that was floating away returned to the rational stability. However, the very thought came into my mind then I let down the cup on the table was that, another desperate feeling saying 'I want to be with him forever'. I cannot let this sweetness and rapture from it. I want him to be with me. Or at least one day, we should be together again. I wish I could dedicate my remaining life to him after I go back to Japan, finishing my study here.

The empty cup was the only thing in my eyes, when I finished my thoughts like that. I approached to the small calendar after I cleaned up the dishes. I wrote 「D-Day -6」 in small letters, under the box of tomorrow. Then I sighed heavily, as I was facing a final battle, and returned to my room without further hesitation. I slowly lied down on the bed next to him. I was able to fall in sleep earlier than I thought, despite of the heart that was pumping severely.

"I think I will go out alone, and maybe come back late."

I could feel someone is petting on my head, as I was tangled in sleepiness. He kept talking as he confirmed I am awake.

"…Until when?"

"During this whole week."

"…I can guide you to the travel, I have enough time."

"Maybe next time. I can go by myself this time."

When is that next time you are saying? I did not let that question out. I was afraid he will ignore me and destroy such a decisive mind.

Just as he said, Hikigaya went out in early morning and didn't came back until late night. All I could do was waiting him in my home, occupied by concerns.

[I'm going back now. In about ten minutes.]

I hung up the call from him. He never answered my question asking where he have been whole day, but just saying he will come back soon. That was the only point I could be relieved, which he will definitely come back to this place. I just feel happiness from the fact that I can see his face again.

I imagined the future, of him and me, during that ten minutes of happy waiting. Should we go back to the days we just talked through the phone after this one week? Will we able to have a lovely daylife as we have whispered, after we meet again after this? I wish I could tell him everything, my true thoughts. That I want him to be with me from now on. If that is not possible, I will tell him to stay with me after my study is finished.

He came back, seems tired, with the sound of doorbell. I grabbed him who was going straight to him room to take a rest, and dragged him to my bed, laid him on it. I chanted the words I had in my mind as I pet his hair, sitting beside him.

"Hikigaya, I want to be with you."

"…what, that's a confession, right?"

"n,nope. I didn't say I love you… that's a minor point anyway. So, do you want to be with me?"

My throat choked a bit as I say. But his eyes avoided my eyes, having a miserable color in them.

"Of course I do…but that is difficult."

"…during these days, after I met you, I think I cannot hold myself without you since mere phone call is not enough now. Though we cannot be together now, but maybe after I finish…"

"Impossible."

He said, as staring into my eyes straightly. He words was flat, as it does not have any lie in it.

"Your mother, is not as indulgent as allowing or failing to notice such situation. She will try her best to separate us even after you finish your study."

"…it's not that harsh"

"You know, she contacted to me and Yuigahama, asking us to stay away from you. Especially to me… I don't know why, but I am sure that is not end of her action."

"…I can renounce, or there are still other ways. I am not as helpless as that times."

"You will lose too many things. Look, even this house itself is supported by your parents, and you cannot be independent right after you finish your study. I don't want to push you, to be confront such a harsh reality."

He turned his back towards me. I knew what you said. But… I opened my mouth with a blaming voice to his back.

"…then, you are going to give up on me?"

"…"

"I, I am…"

"Please wait till next time. I will do my best."

I could not say anything further. I could not spit the question outside, that when is that next time is. I stared at his back for a long time after that, and I fall into sleep next to him.

He went out early in the morning and came back late every day. I met my friends or went to library to spent time, as I fall into heartbreaking feelings when I was waiting for him alone. I already handed him spare key for my house, expecting him sitting on the couch when I returned to home, but there was nobody. All I could wish was the night I can sleep beside him, who came back late in night. I scratched [D-Day 2] on the tomorrow's day of the calendar before went to bed.

"I want you to stay with me whole day, at least last day."

I held on him at the morning, who was trying to sneak out without waking me up. Hikigaya shut his mouth a minute, staring his arms held by me. After all, he have gone out of the door, saying such a contradictory words; I cannot promise, but I definitely will.

It was sunny day today. There were few white, pretty clouds on the sky. It is normal for London to have gray clouds and rain all four seasons, so it was pretty lucky. The park I have been with Hikigaya was also more crowded that it use to be. I could see families with their children, as it was weekends. Couples holding their hands together and walking, guys throwing Frisbees to each other. Although I do not like crowds, but I enjoy watching the park with liveness.

I sat on the mat at the great place. I opened a book which has worn cover. I use to bring recent novels, but it was a classic literature today. [Wuthering Heights] by Emily Bronte. It was the first book I red after arrived in England. I still feel the excitement I could feel from the sentences, as I use to read translated version.

I liked that desperateness in this book. I loved an intensity and pervading emotions in the sentences, that even makes such a tragic ending could be felt as happy one. But as I think about it now, I did not have a feeling called desperation at the time I read it. I could have had such emotion, a desperate missing and longing towards someone after I spent a year here.

I failed to focus on the text, as every sentences started to poke into my heart and tear it. It reminds me his sad face, revive my desperate feelings toward Hikigaya more I read it. Images of him saying 'impossible' firmly, the face with resignation rather than earnest. I am not sure I can hold myself without seeing him, even until I finish my study. I have a desperate desire that I want to spend my whole life with him. Yet, it seems that he does not have it. That echoing thought attempted to tear my heart into pieces with the sentences.

In the night, Hikigaya called me. He said he cannot spend much time with me on the last day, which is tomorrow, with dozens of excuses. But all that I could hear was the very first word he spoke.

[I'm Sorry.]

That was all that I could keep think about, alone on the bed. I dwelled on it until the bitterness it was, but it just inscribed that words into my head which was much hurtful than the separation 2 years ago.

D-Day -1. I wrote that on the calendar, in to today's box after I woke up in late afternoon. It is the last day. He will leave tomorrow, when the number becomes 0. Yet he have not returned to home now, as the sun is falling down. I brewed black tea for my own, and picked up the fiction of Emily Bronte that I haven't finished yesterday.

I always felt pain as the story approaches to the climax. My emotion was beaten up by the death of Catherine, and thwarted cry of Heathcliff. Her cry saying that his soul is myself, and his cry saying that stay with himself does not matter being harassed, all of them stabbed my heart stronger than I ever felt. Finally, I just closed the book before the end. I just could not like the felling from the word 'ending'. Like the story is getting closer to the end, maybe my love towards you was ended in your mind. It was painful. I wanted to ignore the fact that my belief was false, that I thought we had a resonance we can understand everything.

Extreme loneness attacked me right after I let the book down on the table. It was the solitude I felt in the days I never expected anything from anyone. I can feel myself left alone like a deserted island. It seems that the only person I thought would anchor in my small harbor is going to leave again. And I know nobody will stay next to me again after he left.

The sky is already getting dark, and there are only 3 hours left until 'today' is gone. I did not even want that 3 hours to pass away, at the moment Hikigaya came back with the key I gave him. I did not want to lose him, who will go to bed directly.

Such twisted mind was expressed with an odd way, as I started crying loud when he came into the living room.

"…I hate you, soo much."

Her crying face is swimming in my mind. You can say it is mean, but I just felt that face too lovely. She became mature with a fresh, girlish cuteness during 2 years. I probably get fainted if I met her accidently without much determination I had.

Yukinoshita stared me with her empty eyes, around of her eyes became red. She demanded further explanation with the eyes of confusion that haven't understood that just happened. But I already said everything I have to, nothing more.

"…that's what it is."

I raised my shoulders. Her hands were stiffed with holding few papers in it. Yukinoshita rubbed her pretty eyes with cloth and said between her tears.

"… It was language training, not a travel?"

"As you see."

Her eyes got widened as skimming through the visa I get for the working holiday. It was tough to get it, while the acceptance of visa is getting decreased and attending the same university she attend was hard. She will stay in this country for 2 more years for her study. So it was the best choice for me to get a tourism-working visa that will allow me to stay here 2 years and do the study as well.

"…Why, why…?"

She said, staring my eyes with inflamed hers.

"Why… well, I want to be with you, as somebody said?"

"…It is ridiculous. You didn't need to do such."

Yukinoshita shut her mouth firmly after saying that. I guess she understood the reason why I clanged to it, at least partly. I have heard few news of the Yukinoshita family from Miss Haruno. It seems that a guy who will get engaged with Yukinoshita after her study. Every procedures aiming to removing her from the priority of the family business and send her away in marriage, took place without any difficulties. Even Haruno cannot do anything about it, since it was too big issue for her as well. She said there were many discussions underground, without noticing to Yukinoshita in abroad.

There were not much things I could do about it in japan, as my heart was already stoles by her. All choices I had then was to fly straight to her place and emigrate, or planned for some ways to resist against that dictatorship. The problem got too huge for me to protect her, with mere phone call.

"…then why you lied to me as if it was just travel?"

"Um, just, a surprise? Ouch, hey, don't throw that book. That's heavy."

She started to throw dozen books to me, with red burning face. She was crying and dripping tears, like her anger is not controllable or sorrow she had during all the days is flowing back. I wanted to make her surprised, but the actual reason was the anxiety I had. I was not sure how strict her family is watching over her. And there were some problems in procedures as my application was made too hurry. I also had many things to research, since I have applied out of the normal application period.

"…Then was it the same surprise you came back late every day?"

She asked me without wiping her tear, but with angry face.

"Well, that's one of the reasons, but I had so much things to make sure and research. And I just wanted to see around alone, you know, it is rare for me to go travel."

"…was lonely. I was, I was lonely severely…"

Her cry was becoming to get louder. She wept as she covered her face with pretty two hands.

"I said, I want to be with you whole day, at least this last day…"

I hugged her over, who was crying on the floor crouched. She pushed my chest with her hands while relying her crying face on my shoulder. Unlike the scene a moment ago, I did not want to see such face of crying baby. It was not cute, but too sad and pitiful.

Once she told me, that she wondered she may never had anyone's interest or love at all. As like every other people are interacting with each other on the ground, she alone was like an island far from the land. While few people visited there, I was the only one stayed on and protected it.

"…It's not the last day today. I said I stay longer than a week."

"…"

"Then I can promise now. I will stay with you all day, on the last day."

Yukinoshita just rubbed her face on me instead of her answer. Hands that pushed me before is just hitting on my chest softly now.

"once, you said you are island, and I was the only visitor stayed on it."

"…"

"But I don't think so. I was not something like a visitor."

She looked above to me with red eyes. That make me embarrassed since the words I am going to say itself is.

"…so, I am the wave, not just a visitor. The wave that covers around your island, and stays with."

"…"

"I will be with you all the time. So do not feel yourself lonely."

"…fine. Keep surging upon me."

"By the way, when is the last day you are talking about?"

"ekk, should I really say that? You know it vaguely as well."

"…I don't know. I don't, although I know. So tell me."

"No, I don't. I feel like an women voice actor would tell me to pick what to do with carefulness if I say that."

"I cannot understand what you are talking about… Fine, then will you do the proof of oath with that patronizing mouth?"

"…Of course, I will."