It was oddly intimate, the way Sam was sitting there with Josh in his dorm room. She sat on his bed, back resting against the cheap headboard, and he laid beside her, his head resting in her lap. His arm was draped across her legs, and she idly played with his dark locks of hair.

He had called her that afternoon, wanting some company. They had barely exchanged words, but when Sam saw him laying on his bed, he didn't need to speak for her to know how he was feeling. It was plain on his face.

It had only been a few months since that awful night. Josh wasn't doing well in his classes; Sam had decided to put college off altogether. And here they were. It was surreal. Not that Sam had never been interested in Josh before, but she had taken him out of consideration when she started dating his sister.

Pushing back tears, Sam let out a breath. Josh looked up at her, his chocolate eyes bleary and bloodshot. She gave him a weak smile and squeezed his shoulder.

"Hey," she said quietly, "why don't we go do something?"

"What do you have in mind?" Josh asked, his deep voice causing vibrations along her thigh.

"We could get something to eat. Have you eaten today?" He didn't answer, but looked away. "I haven't either," she said. "Come on. It'll be good for both of us to get out."

After a pause, Josh sighed and sat up, leaving her lap cold. "Where do you want to go?" he asked, mustering enthusiasm.

"I think Rocky's Diner is open," she suggested.

"No," he responded quickly. "Not there."

Sam winced. Of course, that had been Beth and Hannah's favorite restaurant. "We can't avoid these places forever," she said, gently placing a hand on his shoulder.

He shrugged her off and stood. "You sound like my therapist," he said with a shake of his head.

An idea struck Sam. "I know where we can go," she said, getting to her feet.

"Where's that?" Josh asked as Sam picked up her purse.

"It's a surprise," she said with a smile. Looping her arm through his, she said, "I promise you'll like this one."

Sam wasn't a vegetarian, but she wouldn't call herself a meat lover. Not in the way Hannah had been, anyway. But they had both fallen in love with this hole-in-the-wall barbeque place they had found thirty miles outside of town during one of their mini road trip adventures. It was the kind of place one could get an obscene amount of meat on the cheap, smoked and slathered in tangy home-made sauce. The two girls had made the pilgrimage to this restaurant on special occasions, such as a birthday or their three-month anniversary.

Neither of them told anyone about this place, even after they had broken up. It was their special secret. But she was gone now, and Josh shared his sister's love for tasty animals, so she figured this would be a good place to take him.

They were both quiet on the drive. Sam let the radio play, but Josh kept fiddling with it, turning the station at every commercial until he finally turned it off altogether.

"So, was this food idea just a clever rouse to kidnap me?" Josh asked. Sam smiled.

"You've caught on to my plan!" she joked along. "It's too late for you now. I've got you in my clutches!"

Finally he cracked a smile, even if it was just an upturn of his lips. "I guess there are worse people to be kidnapped by."

"Thanks, I think," Sam said with a light laugh. She pulled into the small strip mall and cruised past a couple of outlet stores before parking in front of the restaurant...only to find it closed down.

She stared in silence as she looked at the space where the sign once read "Ziggy's BBQ and Grill", the outline still visible. Brown paper covered the windows that once looked into a bustling business, and the picnic-style tables that furnished the patio were long gone.

"Not terribly appetizing," Josh teased.

Sam broke down.

She had cried a lot since Hannah and Beth went missing, but Sam always kept it together when she was with Josh. He always had such a profound and muting sadness to him that Sam had to be a source of stability and strength for the both of them. It was a role she had come to find comfort in, as it was a way she could help.

But now, seeing her and Hannah's special place all but gone made the reality that she was gone all too real, and Sam couldn't help the tears that spilled from her eyes nor the sobs that ripped from her throat.

Suddenly she was in Josh's arms, but on her left side. She hadn't realized that Josh had gotten out of the car, went around and opened her door just to hug her fully. She welcomed his embrace, throwing her arms around his back and burying her face in his chest.

They held each other for several minutes, but it felt like hours. When at last Sam could calm down enough to get ahold of herself, she met Josh's watery gaze.

"It's okay," he said quietly, "I was pretty distraught when the Chipotle by my place closed down."

Smiling through her tears, she pinched his arm lightly. She took several breaths before she said, "Hannah and I...we used to come here."

His expression darkened, and he moved away from her. Sam got to her feet as he turned away from her. "She never told me about it," he said, looking at the blank facade.

"It was kind of our special thing," Sam explained. "After we broke up, I came here alone. It helped me."

Leaning against the car, Josh met her gaze. "I went home today. It was too quiet. My parents are in California. It was empty." Sam nodded her understanding. That was why he had called her.

"Josh," she said, feeling tears well up in her eyes again. She fought them back. "I'm sorry. I'm so...so sorry."

He shook his head. "At least you were conscious," he mumbled.

"Josh," Sam started, but he cut her off.

"Come on," he said, then opened the back passenger door and crawled in, laying down across the seats. Sam looked in at him quizzically, and he waved her in.

She was hesitant, but she crawled in with him, laying herself on top of him. She let him position her body into a more comfortable place, both of their legs dangling out the open door.

She laid her head on his chest and heard his quickened heartbeat, and she felt his strong arms around her waist. She was once again struck by how oddly intimate they had become, and she could hardly understand her own feelings about it.

"This is weird, isn't it?" he asked, echoing her thoughts.

"I'll be honest, it is," she said.

"That's what I like about you, Sammy," he said, feeling her palm lightly. "You're always honest. No mind games. No manipulation. That's what Hannah liked about you too."

Sam swallowed back a sob and remained quiet.

He let out a long sigh. "What are we going to do with ourselves?" he wondered.

"We'll have to learn to move on," Sam replied. "We live in a new reality now. It's going to be very, very hard. But it'll be okay one day."

"I don't think I can see that happening," he admitted.

Sam squeezed his hand lightly. "That's what you've got me for."

"New reality, huh?" he said, his tone a little more hopeful. "That's going to take some getting used to."

"We can do it," Sam said.

"We have do, don't we?"