It was never meant to come out. Drew had promised herself after the battle that she would never lose anyone again. Everyone she had loved was ripped from her like the stitches pulled from a wound too soon, and now she was scared of losing again.

It had started with Lee.

Drew had never meant to be a fighter; it wasn't one of her natural talents. Her hands, while perfectly manicured, were not fast enough to handle a dagger like Piper or Annabeth, and she was too afraid to use a sword after nearly impaling herself on her first day at camp.

She was not a fighter. She had long ago accepted her place as a pretty girl just like so many of her sisters. She didn't want to fight, she didn't want to watch as the people she loved were struck down, broken and forsaken by the parents they fought for.

Everything began her first summer at Camp Half-Blood. She was the newest addition to Cabin 10, surrounded by equally gorgeous siblings, most of whom could not care less about her as long as she didn't use their makeup. Silena was the exception. It had been Silena's first year as the counselor after their brother, Val, had gone off to college, and the older girl was determined to be an involved sibling.

Silena had shown her the ropes, taught her about how the camp worked, who most of the people were, who their mom was, etc. After the tour of the grounds, Silena had stopped in front a small, shed-like building, full of ancient and deadly defenses. When they had gone inside to get Drew a weapon, she had knocked over a suit of armor, accidentally crushing another newbie. His name was Lee.

He had scrambled up from under the armor and started cursing her out. Drew liked that. He wasn't like most twelve-year-olds, he wasn't afraid of using things worse than damn.

Still, Drew didn't like being yelled at, something she had learned from her life with her father before he dumped her on his parents. As soon as Lee had crossed into her personal space, she had shouted "Stop!" Lee and Silena both froze. Drew had laughed her ass off looking at the bewildered and slightly terrified look on Lee's face when she first discovered her charmspeak. It's something she still cherishes in those moments when her walls go down.

Throughout that first summer, Lee and Drew formed a close friendship. They would sneak out at night, either avoiding the harpies or persuading them to leave them alone. They spent many nights on Zeus' fist, staring skyward, pointing out all of the constellations and talking about how incestuous the whole Greek side of the family was.

At the end of the summer, she had kissed him during the celebration of Percy's successful quest. Her hands, tickled by his short honey-colored hair, had pulled his head close until his chapped lips met her apple-glossed ones.

As Drew soon found, long distance relationships don't work well. Lee had gone back to South Carolina while she stayed at the camp. She would have been alone save the dozen campers who either had nowhere to go, or who stayed at camp for their own safety. Over the school year, she grew more and more irritable, especially when know-it-all Annabeth Chase would teach the history classes, but still no word from Lee. She tried so hard to be faithful to Lee, but he didn't try quite as hard.

When she had Iris Messaged him in March, she was less than pleased to find him sucking face with some mortal. After that, Drew didn't talk to him for a year. When he came back in June, she had changed her whole look and she used her voice in a way that didn't please Silena, but Drew just refused to care. Her sneakers and t-shirts traded in for blouses and stilettos, her lip gloss traded for a shade of red lipstick that would make the Ares's eyes jealous. Gone was her modesty, replaced by oozing sensuousness and flirtation.

Silena had worried over the change, but she had failed to persuade Drew to stop.

That summer was spent with a lot of glares from Drew and many attempts at apology from Lee. She ignored every last one, often telling him to go jump in the lake. Once the naiads got fed up with him, Lee had stopped, just letting Drew have her space.

She knew he had seen her break countless hearts, but she was too busy being spiteful to realize that with every heart she broke just broke both of theirs more.

The next year, Lee had become the counselor of the Apollo Cabin, and Drew had mostly stopped breaking hearts, but for most of the summer, they continued their cold war. Shortly before the Battle of the Labyrinth, they had started talking again.

Drew thinks it was Silena's doing that the two of them ended up on stable duties at the same time, but she'll never know. After Lee accidentally got some muck on her shoes, Drew had not so accidentally thrown some muck at his face.

When they had both been covered in the grime, they started laughing, so hard that Drew can still feel the echoes of it in her ribcage. After washing themselves thoroughly, they went on a date to Zeus' Fist where Lee laid out a bunch of flower petals and brought a fancy bottle of (smuggled) sparkling apple cider. They had spent the night laying on the sun-patterned blanket Lee stole from his brother, Will, and talking about their thoughts on Luke's army, how they thought the di Angelo kid was, and Percy Jackson, the Poseidon kid who was missing, and maybe dead. But most of all they talked about their lives since their fight.

Drew mentioned her grandmother's passing. Lee talked about his mom getting divorced again. Drew talked about her plans to be a fashion designer, and Lee talked about his dream of participating in the Olympics. They caught each other up on everything they had missed in their feud. Lee had apologized again, and Drew finally accepted.

They feel asleep with their hands intertwined, smiles on their faces.

They got to be together for barely a week when the battle came to them. From their special place, Zeus' Fist, came hordes of enemies, swarming like roaches to crumbs.

Drew hadn't known what to do, her fingers had trembled around her dagger, and her voice had shaken every time she ordered the enemy to disarm themselves, but the giants had come, hulking, scaly monsters that made her voice die in her throat.

Just as one of the giants was about to crush her, everything slowed down. She could see, in the corner of her eye, that Lee was running toward her. Every muscle in her body had tensed, but it was too late. Lee slammed into her, pushing her out of the way, and she was forced to watch. She saw the exact moment the cursed green giant's fists came down, shattering his skull.

She had hit the ground, numb in shock. He couldn't be dead. He wasn't allowed, she didn't give him permission, but there she was, splattered in his blood, his limp arm draped across her ankles.

Then she had screamed. She screamed and cried, startling the giant. There she was, a fourteen-year-old Aphrodite girl who couldn't even put her oversized armor on right, an ill-balanced sword dropped to the grass beside her, what could she possibly do? But when the giant moved to step on Lee's body, she grew up. Her fears were suppressed by her rage, her hands were steady as she rose to her feet, and her kaleidoscope eyes flashed like lightning in a clear sky.

"Stop," she barked, making the giant and the five enemy demigods around them freeze. With her eyes as unrelenting and unforgiving as titanium, she ordered the giant to kill himself. He stared in horror as his body fought him, his arms rising, slowly, jerkily to his neck. Once his hands were there, she had commanded him to do it, relishing the snapping of his neck before he turned to dust and drifted over the bodies of the rogue demigods who had done the same.

Once the battle was over, Drew had collapsed into Silena's arms, not aware of her treachery, tooconcerned with her grief over Lee.

She had cursed her mother. Said awful, though not untrue, things. She had given her meal offerings to Hades, praying for Lee's spirit. She had cut her hair off, the crazed glint in her eyes terrifying Silena.

She trained in secret, honing her charmspeak, her only weapon against the cruel and degrading world.

For the next year, when she was still fragile and healing, Silena had comforted and supported her, becoming Drew's best friend and confidant. But then she lost Silena.

Her sister had snuck off to battle, dying while Drew had still been guarding the camp. It was only after Silena had died that Drew learned of her deal with Kronos. But because she hadn't fought in the Battle of Manhattan, she learned of Silena's actions in the letter she left.

In it were apologies to everyone she had betrayed, talking about how she had fallen into Luke's control. Drew had been frozen in shock as she read her older sister's letter. Her consoler had been part of the enemy, and it felt like Drew's splintered heart was shattered anew.

In the note, Silena asked Drew to forgive her, and give her apologies to everyone else should she not return from battle, but Drew couldn't bear it.

She had burned the letter, not letting Silena's words reach anyone else. She also stopped showing that she cared about anyone other than herself when she was thrust into the role of cabin counselor. She thought it was ironic that her mother was the goddess of love, and yet she felt like she could no longer love anything.

For months after she took over, she ruled the cabin tyrannically, being a bitch so she wouldn't get too close to someone she could lose. She refused to allow any of her siblings on quests, claiming it was a disgrace to their mother's image, but really she just wanted to keep them alive as long as possible.

Her siblings were innocent, several of them children who could barely survive capture the flag. She knew that if they went out, they would not return.

Then Piper had showed up. A tomboy like Drew had once been, and Drew hated her instantly. She could feel that this girl was different, she was strong and defiant, chaotic and wild. Drew couldn't protect someone like that, they would never listen, and they would threaten everything Drew had worked for.

Piper was everything Silena had preached about Aphrodite. She believed in true love, and that beauty was more than just skin deep. She saw the power and danger that came with love. Drew knew that Piper was her sister even before she was claimed.

That's why Drew had volunteered for her first quest. She let Piper think it was because of the son of Zeus; it was better that way. No one needed to know she cared.

She had used her charmspeak, trying to convince the camp that she should go on the quest to save Hera. She couldn't let any of her siblings be put in danger, and if that meant she would get battered and bruised in their, place, so be it.

But Piper had defied her, her charmspeak as potent as Drew's. Piper had been claimed with a make-over, the same way everyone in Cabin 10 had been, and it was decided that she would go on the quest.

Drew had tried to distance herself from Piper, trying not to care about her so that she wouldn't be hurt if the girl were never to come back.

When Piper had returned from the quest, battered and exhausted, but still alive, Drew had let out a sigh of relief. However, when Piper challenged her for control of the cabin, Drew's internal relief had quickly turned to seething indignation.

Now, months after the end of the Giant War, Piper was about to embark on another quest, this one a sure death sentence.

When they had argued before Piper's departure, her sister had shouted, "Why do you even care if I do this quest? Don't you want me to die so you can take over again!?"

Drew had felt tears welling in her eyes, snapping back, "Of course I don't want that!"

Piper had seemed taken aback by Drew's exclamation, but Drew wasn't done.

"Because I care! Because I don't want to lose another person who I love! Why can't you just let me protect you!"

Drew was shaking, tears flowing now, her hand over her mouth. Why had she said that? She had promised herself that she would never let anyone know that she cared, never break character, no matter how much it pained her. So why? Why had those words slipped out, unbidden and unwanted?

Piper walked over slowly, her expression unreadable. Finally, she reached out, grabbing Drew's hands firmly.

"Drew, you don't need to protect me, I can protect myself. You can't expect demigods to have an easy life, so we need to know how to take care of ourselves. You can watch over and guide us, but you shouldn't try to stop us." Piper gave her older sister a sad smile. "We don't need to be here to be safe. We need to learn and live, but you can teach us. You can care about us the way our mother is too busy to, you can be our support, but you cannot protect us all. That's too big a task to take on alone; it will tear you apart, and then you can't help anyone."

Drew turned away, hating the way Piper's words stuck. It felt like everything was falling apart, including her walls of self-defense.

Piper pulled her into a hug, surprising Drew. "Don't worry, I'll come home. I promise."

A/N: Thank you for reading! Please check out my other PJO/HoO stories, and be sure to review!