Apologies about the screwy formatting, let's try this again...
"Hey, Ronnie, you got any primer in your pack?"
Veronica speared one of the gecko steaks and flipped it over, nudging it closer to the flames. "Yeah. It's in a gray bag, probably toward the bottom."
Cass made a noise of acknowledgement and crouched near Veronica's backpack. She whistled through her teeth as she undid the clasp, then glanced up as the courier approached.
"Smells good," the man said, a grin on his face as he strolled over to the fire and settled beside Veronica. "How much longer you think it'll be?"
"A few minutes, maybe." Veronica shrugged and leaned back on her hands. The break from the constant heat on her face was pleasant and she closed her eyes and let the breeze cool her skin.
"The fuck?" Cass muttered from behind them.
"Can't you find it?" Veronica called with a roll of her eyes.
"Why the hell are you wastin' space with a teddy bear?" Cass laughed at the find and pulled the bear out of Veronica's bag. She examined it and paraded it through the air, still chuckling. "Jesus, you could be carryin' extra ammo or stimpaks or something!"
Veronica jerked around and felt her blood run cold at the sight of the redhead carelessly toying with the teddy bear. "Put him back." Heat rose up her neck when Cass didn't move, and Veronica scrambled over to the cowgirl. She plucked the bear from Cass' hands and returned it to her bag carefully, biting her tongue to ease the emotions whirling in her brain.
Cass rolled her eyes and started to snark at the scribe, but Veronica shot her a glare and shook her head. The cowgirl frowned, lifted her hands in surrender, and took the primer Veronica shoved at her with a muttered "thanks".
The scribe didn't answer and walked back over to the fire. She sat down with a barely-restrained huff and stared into the fire.
"A teddy bear? Aren't you… a little old for that?" Six ventured, his eyes twinkling.
"Don't make me drop your dinner in the fire." Veronica avoided his gaze and poked the steaks again. "I'm not going to talk about it."
The courier shrugged and set to work opening a can of beans. "That's fine. Cass probably isn't gonna let you live it down, though."
Veronica pulled the gecko steaks off the fire and put them on plates, pretending she didn't know Six was right.
Dinner was a quiet affair, though Cass and Six finally broke the silence by discussing travel plans for the next day. Veronica retired to bed early, curling up on her bedroll and staring up at the stars. She reached over and dipped her hand into her bag, her fingers searching out the worn fur of the teddy bear. Knowing it was still there and safely tucked away soothed the knot of tension in Veronica's chest, and she closed the bag and rolled over onto her side to sleep.
=====:=====
Just as Six had predicted, Cass began teasing her about the teddy bear whenever she got a chance. Veronica did her best to ignore it and not rise to the bait, but a few times she snapped at the cowgirl and Six had to step in to defuse the situation.
Cass' attention waned when the group picked up a new member on the way back into Vegas, and she took to spending her time trying to convince Arcade Gannon that she could be his bisexual exception. The doctor was not amused.
Veronica was grateful for the respite, but the redhead's prying into her life had raised a few unpleasant memories. Nightmares that she hadn't had since Christine left began plaguing her, but Veronica did her best to ignore them.
One night, she jerked awake and barely managed to contain a scream. Her whole body shook violently and her throat constricted with tears. Veronica did her best to fend off the emotional breakdown, but she knew there was no use. Still trembling, she slid out of her bed and fumbled in her bag for the teddy bear.
With the bear firmly in her grasp, Veronica crept out of the bedroom and closed the door behind herself. She made it halfway across the foyer before she sank down against the wall by the elevator and buried her face in the teddy bear's stomach and cried.
The images from her nightmares began to fade, but the despair didn't, and it felt like she was seventeen and Christine had just left her. Her anger had long since faded, and it was all Veronica could do to keep breathing.
The master bedroom door opened with a quiet creak, and Veronica screwed her eyes shut and forced herself to be silent.
Six walked across the foyer and sat beside her wordlessly, resting his head against the wall. He glanced over at her in the darkness and studied her for a few seconds. "Everything okay?" he murmured.
Veronica nodded, hoping it was dark enough that he couldn't see the tear tracks on her face. She looked down at the bear and smoothed out its fur gently, and memories of a smaller, paler arm curled around the bear choked her up all over again.
Six wrapped an arm around her shoulders and pulled her to him, letting the scribe sag against his shoulder and cry herself out. He rocked her gently, but didn't say anything.
Veronica played with the bear's arms as she began to calm down, still sniffling when Six gave her a gentle squeeze.
"Better?" he asked softly.
The scribe nodded. "Sorry for waking you up. I just… had some nightmares." She shivered and hugged the teddy bear close again. She didn't have to look up to know Six was eyeing her and the bear. "He helps," she mumbled defensively.
Rather than give her a snarky retort, the courier just smiled. "Yeah? That's good. What's his name?"
Veronica wiped her eyes on the shoulder of her shirt and managed a shaky grin. "George. I know, it's ridiculous. I'm almost thirty and I've got a teddy bear. I just… he was Christine's."
Six made a quiet noise of understanding and gave her another squeeze.
Veronica smiled and buried her face in the bear's stomach again, inhaling deeply. She always hoped that if she tried hard enough, she'd still be able to smell Christine. Even though she knew it was impossible, the thought still helped to comfort her.
"This is all I have left of her," the brunette murmured after a few moments. "I was so angry when she left… I threw out almost everything she ever gave me. I spent like three days crying, and then… I found him under my bed." She played with one of the bear's ears gently. "I couldn't get rid of him. He's… God, sometimes he's the only thing that keeps me sane."
The courier nodded and studied the bear seriously, then reached over and shook its paw. "I had a bear when I was a kid," he admitted. "I think my big sister stole it from a caravan. But I took that thing everywhere, until it fell apart. I had a little funeral and everything. It was rough."
Veronica laughed softly and leaned against her friend. "How old were you?"
Six shrugged. "My memory's a little off ever since Benny shot me. Seems like I wasn't very tall, so probably like ten or so? I don't really remember. Come to think of it, it might have been a pet gecko instead, but I'm pretty sure it was a teddy bear."
The scribe grinned and hugged her teddy bear to her chest. "That's right up there with saying the Brotherhood has eye lasers."
The man laughed. "Think there's actually people that believe that?"
"I've met some," Veronica admitted, shaking her head in disbelief.
They grinned at each other in the dark, and let the conversation dwindle to silence. Veronica's eyelids began to droop after a while, and she rested her head on the courier's shoulder. "Thanks, Six."
His response was little more than a soft rumble in her ear, and Veronica dragged herself to her feet and bid him goodnight before returning to bed. She curled up underneath her covers, the bear still in her arms, and drifted off into a much more peaceful sleep.
When she woke the next morning, Cass had already gotten up, and Veronica prepared herself for a fresh round of teasing as she hid the teddy bear away again. Instead, Cass and Six greeted her with a cup of coffee and a plan to travel to Jacobstown.
The courier promised that he'd participate in a snowball fight if they found enough snow, then got up to make sure he had a good coat. Cass drained her coffee and stared at the empty cup, then eyed the scribe critically.
"I'll leave some room in my bag for extra supplies," she offered after a few moments. "So you don't crush your bear."
Veronica waited for a snarky addition, but it never came. She realized Six must have explained about the teddy bear and wasn't sure if she should be embarrassed or not, but she offered the cowgirl a hesitant smile. "Thanks, Cass."
The redhead smiled and got to her feet. "Think we can find a way to dump snow down Six's shirt? I betcha ten caps he squeals like a baby gecko."
Veronica laughed at the mental image. "Let's do it."
The group spent the morning getting ready for their trip, and before they left, Veronica made sure the teddy bear was tucked safely in her bag. She smiled to herself, then shouldered her bag and headed for the elevator.
No one ever teased her about the bear again.