By the time Sheldon was brought up on deck, Penny had ordered a plank to be lashed in place, the long end dangling out over the ocean swells. Sheldon looked from her face to the bared sword in her hand to the plank. The crew mates had begun to gather, silent witness to the spectacle. He paled and swayed a little on his feet. "What is all this about?" he managed.

"You lied to me," she hissed. She shoved him toward the plank, and he was forced to step up onto it to avoid being impaled by the sharp point of her sword. "Or should I say, you lied to me, your majesty?"

A shocked murmur ran among the crew. All of them seemed to have assembled amidships, waiting to see what Penny was going to do.

"No, the correct term would be your highness, if I wanted to go back to that life, which I do not. You may find it hard to believe, but I never cared for rank or privilege. All I wanted was the freedom to be able to carry out my research, unencumbered by the onerous duty of court appearances or the pressure to marry some suitable young lady."

Penny snarled and poked at him with her cutlass, forcing him further out onto the plank. "I'm no lady-never will be-and I'm about as far as you could get from suitable. Did it amuse you to make me fall in love with you?"

He met her gaze squarely. "No, but the feelings I have for you were so utterly outside my previous experience that it took me some time to realize that I am just as much in love with you."

Her jaw dropped, and for a moment, there was complete silence. A slight figure edged closer to her. It was Stuart who, in a barely audible voice, murmured, "Cap'n, look to your men."
She wrenched her gaze away from the one whom she thought had betrayed her and scanned the faces of her crew. To a man, they were tense, wary and quiet as a dead calm. The silence should have tipped her off, and would have, had she not been so focused on punishing Sheldon for making her look foolish. The tip of her sword wavered, and then she slowly lowered her arm to her side. The only sound was the lapping of the waves against the hull and the creak of rope and canvas.
"I hear you were once pardoned by a king," she said in a loud voice. "You must have the devil's own luck, for I find myself willing to offer you a reprieve as well."
He turned and faced her. He stood tall and proud, looking supremely self-assured and yes, handsome too, despite the fact that he was standing there with his hands bound behind his back. It reminded her of the day they met, when he had claimed to be a simple scholar. He walked toward her, and it was clear he had gained his sea legs as he neither flinched nor looked down as he balanced on the narrow plank.
"Do you also require an oath of loyalty from me?" he asked as he hopped lightly down from the gangplank. For the first time, his balance failed him, and he swayed. She lunged at him before he could fall and found that she was now clinging to him like a limpet. Her chin lifted, and she tried to tell herself it was for pride, rather than just so she could see into his stormy blue eyes.
"What oath of yours could I trust?" she asked warily.
"A two-fold one: First, I will join your crew as first mate..."
Her eyes widened. Was he insane? She already had a first mate, one who could probably break him in two.
"...which ought to counteract any putative authority I would have as your husband," he finished.
"Husband?" she whispered in shock.
One side of his mouth lifted in a rare smile. "Is that a yes?"
She continued to stare at him as he said, "The reason all those cold fish blue bloods never appealed to me was that I had yet to meet my equal. I had to travel halfway around the world to find her, my pirate queen of the Caribbean.
She dropped her hands and stepped back. There was one flaw in his plan, something he may have overlooked in his arrogance, but that she never could if she hoped to retain the respect of her crew.
"I already have a first mate," she said. "Were you planning on having him take your place on the plank?"
He took another step toward her, so close she could feel the heat of his body. He leaned over and whispered in her ear, "I love you, even when you are being a silly, stubborn wench." Then he straightened and said in a louder voice, "I will give up my share of the gold and any future gains to help you purchase a second ship, which Kurt would captain under your command. You will build your own fleet and become the pirate queen in truth. Just say the word, your majesty," he declared, sweeping her a decent approximation of a courtly bow, despite the fact that his hands were still tied behind his back.
She admired his cunning, the way he made it seem like it was all up to her even as he was manipulating the situation to his favor. Well, two could play at that game. She grinned and turned to her crew, almost spoiling the moment by laughing at the look of naked ambition on Kurt's face. Yes, it was time he was off her ship.
She hopped up on a crate and yelled, "What say you, me hearties?" Their deafening cheers split the air. She waved her arms, urging them on. It was this sort of power that she loved. Finally, she cut Sheldon free and pulled him up beside her.
"Kurt, it shall be your first official duty as captain to marry us," she called out. "But as I'm a lawless wench, I have no intention of waiting for my wedding night!" She pulled Sheldon's face down to meet hers in a long passionate kiss, to a chorus of wolf whistles and lewd suggestions from the crew.
"A double round of grog for everyone!" she cried, laughing as Sheldon jumped off the crate and pulled her into his arms. This time, he was the one who took her breath away with his kisses as his nimble fingers began working at the knots at the back of her bodice. They stumbled back to her cabin and slammed and bolted the door behind them.

A few days later, the Queen of the Seas dropped anchor in a bustling Caribbean port. Now that Kurt had pledged a portion of his loot to her for the next five years, Penny had no problem putting up her share of the gold to buy another ship. Raj and Howard had also contributed their gold, each confessing privately to her that their families were already rich enough. All three of Sheldon's friends chartered passage on a heavily-armed brigantine bound for Paris. Eventually, they would make their way back to the university in Berlin. All three would swear to Sheldon's family that he had been killed in the initial attack on the merchant ship.

Sheldon stood by Penny's side with his arm around her waist. Sunlight glittered on a new gold hoop in his left ear as he solemnly waved goodbye to his friends. (He had fainted when the piercing was done, but Penny had been the only witness. He knew she would keep his secrets… all of them.)

Leonard, Howard and Raj waved back before climbing in the waiting carriage.

"Last chance to change your mind," Penny said softly. "Are you sure you won't regret staying?"

He leaned down and captured her lips with his before he answered, "Never. It's the pirate life for me."

A/N: And now that song is stuck in your head. You're welcome. Seriously, big thanks to all my readers for waiting patiently for the end of the story. Hope it was worth the wait!