It began with a question.

Chapter 1: It began with a text.

Past.

What an ugly word. Just the mere mentioning of it makes me want to cower over and die in embarrassment, memories of that time of my life came rushing back and I found it hard to not visibly wince in the middle of the light novel I was reading. Just like turning the page of a book, or in my case, a novel, you leave the previous page behind, moving forward using the words from before to understand the story in the current page. That's how it should be.

Constantly turning back to reread is an insult to the author! Pay more attention to the story and appreciate it!

Am I getting out of track?

Where was I?

Oh, that's right. The past.

The past is where mistakes live and where bad memories originate from.

Source: me.

I can attest to that too, mind you. Every mistake I have ever done is in the past, and so is every bad memory of mine. See? Case closed. Proof: solid.

The past is nothing but a holding cell for regret, questions and answers that maybe should/shouldn't have been asked or answered. That is the cruel truth.

But, just like most cruel truths, people have the tendency to flat out reject the truth about the past the moment it rears its ugly head in.

Where am I going with this? Well, my stance on liars, cheats and superficial-types has been made obviously clear in the past, but…

Those that look to the past for fond memories or times of success are as two-dimensional as they are egotistical, only bothering to remember times they did well or when life was good, but the moment something embarrassing comes along they'll try their hardest to repress and later forget the mistake or, even worse, laugh it off as something that'll make a nice, funny story for the next social gathering, or whatever.

Bastards.

My past has been full of failures and embarrassment; I'm more than aware about that. But unlike the majority of the population, I look to the past in search of my mistakes to learn from them. Yes, I, Hikigaya Hachiman, loner extraordinaire, purposely put myself in the painful position of digging through my past in search of every mistake I have made to develop into a better person. No longer will I misinterpret an innocent act of kindness into something more than what it truly is! No longer will I be picked up by the actions of a nice girl! No longer will I make brash comments about a woman's age…! Maybe.

I'm still learning in some aspects, obviously, but the effort is there! That counts for something, right?

Right.

Yes, while others shrink away from their past and make the same mistakes over and over, I'll be living the easy life having the knowledge of my past as a guide into the future to minimize any and all mistakes! I'll be self-reliable, just like I am now, and won't have to rely on anybody like those that wish to ignore their past and be completely caught off guard when they mess up for the nth amount of time.

Look to the past normalfags, learn from it and grow to be better like me! Don't casually ignore the bad and take only the good! Take in the bad and forget about the good and grow!

I turned the page to the light novel I was reading, fully aware that I simply put on the notion that I was reading when I was completely focused on my inner monologue. Now this page is hard to follow with a torrent of new names and previously unmentioned locations that were more than likely mentioned in the page before this one.

No matter, I'll just turn back a page and read up on what I missed.

…

Now it makes sense.

Now I know that it looks like I contradicted myself with turning back to read a page when I should have been paying attention, especially since I made it clear how I feel about that kind of thing, but just hear me out for a second.

I got careless and missed one, one, page from this novel I've given my undivided attention to for the past couple of days, nothing too serious. Surely the author of this novel would understand, just this once.

…

I was so distracted with my own inner monologue I didn't notice how quiet the clubroom was until just now. Well, quieter than usual, at least. The Service Club was on what you would call a dry spell, meaning we haven't gotten any requests or visitors – Isshiki aside – for the better part of two weeks now. Which was fine by me.

The prospect of having to work is hellish as it is, but having to work for the troubles of others?

Yeah, no.

If it could stay like this forever, then I would be more than okay with that.

I glance up from my novel to see what my fellow service club members were doing. Yuigahama was doing what she was always doing when she wasn't talking to Yukinoshita, texting. The soft taps of her fingers hitting her phone's buttons in an incredible speed could faintly be heard, but at this point I've probably just gotten used to them to the point where I just drone them out when I'm not paying attention.

Next to her sat Yukinoshita, the Ice Queen herself, calmly and almost regally read from a book – in English perhaps - in her possession.

Sensing an insult coming my way, I instinctively set my eyes on my cup of tea before me just as she glanced away from her book. Did you sense me looking at you, woman? Are these eyes that vile?! It seemed to have worked considering I still had my entire HP left and the fact that the room remained quiet.

See? It pays to remember your mistakes! If I hadn't bothered to learn from all the times a simple glance has gotten me insulted I would have suffered the same fate here today! Still, there's an almost disappointed-type feeling in the clubroom from this event that didn't happen.

Wait, does that mean I was meant to be insulted today?! Ugh…

How… depressing.

I bring the cup of tea closer to my mouth and blow several times before taking a small, experimental sip. Pleased that I didn't burn my sensitive tongue this time around, I take a bigger sip of the already cooled tea and relish the taste before going back to my novel.

This is what it means to understand your mistakes and to grow from them! This is what growth and development mean! My past has served its purpose, which means I can now cast it and the horrible, embarrassing memories it brings away!

I'd like to say that.

My eyes wandered from the novel that was recommended to me and fell upon the windows above and behind Yukinoshita. While the novel was a fine read and an even better recommendation, I just didn't have it in me right now to continue reading.

To say I was troubled would be an exaggeration, but not a lie. To say nothing was bothering me would be a lie, but not an exaggeration.

There were two sayings that have been floating around my head for some time. "Let bygones be bygones" and "Those who fail to learn from history are doomed to repeat it." What triggered my monologue about the past stemmed from what put these sayings in my mind in the first place. The former is more or less around the lines of forgive and forget, so the stains of the past won't taint the future, per se. The latter is more defensive and what my entire monologue was based around, which leads to my current dilemma.

Well, maybe dilemma is too big a word.

Presented with a mistake I made years ago, I may or may not have made the wisest decision towards dealing with said mistake. The events of that day may have also contributed to the sense of unease in the clubroom I've expertly been ignoring.

The nervous glances Yuigahama has been shooting me.

The colder than usual glares Yukinoshita pierces me with.

This unpleasant silence.

If I would have followed my earlier words, this sense of unease, Yuigahama's nervous glances, Yukinoshita's colder glares and this unpleasant silence wouldn't be present right now. And that's what irks me. For all the talking I do about my logical point of view and my ways that I supposedly stick to, I had done the opposite of what I "would have" done.

I lost my way for that short moment.

Chin on hand, elbow on table, I stared at nothing.

"Uh, Hikki?" I hear Yuigahama call me. "Are you okay?"

I turned to her and saw that she had put her phone down. "Yeah." I reply. "Why?"

"Oh, uh, it's just that you looked a little down, that's all." She tries her best to play it off, but even I know how hard it is to break such a heavy silence. Kudos for her.

"I agree." Yukinoshita adds. "You happen to look twenty percent more pathetic than usual."

Urk…

"That so? Tell me; at what percentage am I normally at?"

"In terms of how pathetic you are?" She asks.

I nod.

"One hundred percent."

So I'm 120% pathetic right now?! How cruel! I grimaced visibly.

"Is something bothering you, Hikki?" Yuigahama asks, her tone more confident from the usual atmosphere the clubroom has.

I'm not sure, to be honest. Not knowing if it bothers me or not is what's bothering me, is that a fair response? I answer truthfully.

"No, not really." If it bothered me, truly bothered me, I wouldn't have to wonder if it did or not. Then again, if it didn't bother me, truly didn't bother me, wouldn't I know right off the bat? How troublesome.

"Really?" Yukinoshita starts and I brace myself. "Not your horrid personality, dead fish eyes, or barbaric posture? Surely one of those has to bother you, Hikigaya-kun."

Critical hit, woman! Are you trying to make me faint?!

"Eh, Yukinon…!"

"Hitting all targets, are you? How cruel." I scowl.

We share a small smile before the clubroom goes silent once more. I didn't have to check the time to know that it was close for us to go home for the day; the sun did all that for me.

Seeing that the rest of the club was going to be spent in silence, we all go back to what we were doing. Yuigahama picked up her phone to reply to the several hundred (presumably) texts she got while her phone was down, Yukinoshita drinks from her cup of tea before going back to her book while I look back down to the novel to continue where I left off.

It was only minutes later when it sounded off.

The distinctive sound of a phone vibrating in someone's pocket somehow filled the room, garnering the attention of all those present. Yuigahama holds her phone in place but her fingers stopped and she looks at me nervously, Yukinoshita looks at me and suddenly it feels a little colder. I retract my right arm back and fish for my smartphone in my front pants' pocket.

I open my device and see that it was a text. My phone was one of the earlier models, maybe three generations old now. Not that it meant much, considering a new model pops up every year, adding only aesthetic changes or new confusing updates to the layout.

No thank you, I like my phone the way it is. It did have some problems, though. For example, in its simplicity, my smartphone's notification tab highlights that I received a text, but not from whom, meaning I need to open the text app to see who it was from, which shouldn't be that big of a problem if I hadn't placed the neglected app deep within the phone itself, not as a widget on the front screen. I also can't press the text notification on the notification tab to launch the app instead of looking for it.

Maybe it's time for an upgrade.

"Who is it, Hikki?" I hear Yuigahama ask, but I can't decipher her tone. "Komachi?"

No, it couldn't have been Komachi. She accidentally dropped her phone and cracked the screen several days ago. My little sister is clumsy when it comes to technology.

"No. Her phone is busted right now." I explain, kind of, as I continued my search through all the apps I have. Doing this every time I get a text… I need to change it soon.

"O-oh." She mutters out, almost despondently.

"Now I'm curious as to whom it is." Yukinoshita begins. "For someone other than your blood related sister to communicate with you must be a glutton for punishment. I worry for them."

Hey, hey…

"Does it matter who it is?" I ask, irritated at the questioning and insults being thrown my way. "You and I never ask Yuigahama who she texts. Why ask me?" I found the app, finally.

Yukinoshita prepares herself, but Yuigahama interrupts her.

"It's just that… It's rare to see you get messages, Hikki!" She… she tried to diffuse the situation, but now I feel like crying.

"Yuigahama-san…" Yukinoshita palms her forehead. "Please try to be more considerate in the future."

You're one to talk, Ice Queen! And just because I don't get texts during club doesn't mean I never get texts! I've been texting quite a bit lately, too…

"Eh?" Yuigahama notices my forlorn expression and registers Yukinoshita's words before a blush manifests on her face. "That's-! That's not what I-!" She doesn't know who to apologize to first so she turns from me to Yukinoshita over and over.

I recover soon enough and bring my smartphone to eye level.

I see who sent the text and my eyes slightly narrow before a small sigh escapes my lips.

I close the novel I was reading and quickly place it in my bag, phone still on hand. It was time to go.

I glance at my fellow clubmates and they're both giving me a look I can't decipher. They're concerned, but they don't know why, that's for sure. They want to know for some reason, they want to know who it is, but I shouldn't be the one to tell them. It shouldn't be that hard to guess who it is either, I mean, they were there when it happened.

A part of me considered the possibility that they knew who it was and it was because they knew who it was that they were concerned, but I refused to believe that. They didn't know anything about my past so they shouldn't be concerned over this. But that doesn't change the fact that they know who it was, they had to know; she was the reason why we fell into this uncomfortable state in the first place.

And maybe that was why they were concerned.

I betrayed my words and my opinion on the past in front of them, and maybe they took it the wrong way. Maybe they saw it as a weakness in my character, something they didn't expect. I'm aware of who I am and how I am, just as much as I'm aware of Yukinoshita and Yuigahama's characters too. Seeing a sudden change in someone you think you know causes problems.

Even if they aren't your friends.

How will I react if Yukinoshita or Yuigahama did something so out of character in front of me? Probably not well… It had to do with trust, and whatever amount they had in me was damaged that day.

I may not be their friend, but I am close to them. That can't be ignored or denied.

With that being said, they shouldn't have to worry about that happening again. I was caught off guard that time, it won't happen again.

I can't bring myself to say that to them as it was morbidly embarrassing to even try, but I can't leave things the way they are now.

"It's nothing." I try to shake the heavy atmosphere away as I stand up from my chair, bag on hand. My cellphone goes into my pocket as they stand as well.

The action seems to have a positive effect seeing as Yuigahama and Yukinoshita calm down, relieved expressions appear on their faces.

I make my way to the door as Yukinoshita and Yuigahama begin to clean up as they always do.

"…see you tomorrow." I wave goodbye before I open the door.

"Y-yeah, bye Hikki!"

"Goodbye, Hikigaya-kun."

I felt the atmosphere change before I walked out, it felt nostalgic.

Maybe things would go back to normal soon between us. I would like that.

…

I take out my phone and read the message once more as I walk the empty halls towards the exit. The past presented itself to me recently. The past is where mistakes live and where bad memories originate from. I know this. I know this might be another mistake and I should have stopped this the day the messages started coming, but…

-.-.-

From: Orimoto

Subject: Coffee

Hikigaya~, are we still going to that café after you get out of your club? Text me when you can!

-.-.-

My fingers move and form the reply.

That day, it began with a question.

-.-.-

To: Orimoto

Subject: Re: Coffee

Sure. On my way.

-.-.-

But today, it began with a text.

End

Because this site needs Orimoto x Hikigaya stories desperately.

I plan on making drabbles of this pairing, so give me some suggestions!

These drabbles may or may not be tied together, meaning what happens in one chapter might not necessarily transfer over to the next chapter. That is, unless I mention that it is. Some chapters may be shorter than others, so don't always expect a huge chapter like this with every update.

This is my first Oregairu fic, so I need to know: How did I do? This is a far different style than anything I've ever written so I need feedback. Good AND bad! Props to Loner-kun for giving me the idea to write this!

Please let me know what you think with a review! It helps me get better and motivates me to type!

Thank you for reading, and as always, have a good day!