Ranma ½ - Everything Goes Martial Arts
A Ranma ½ Fanfic
Written By : Noaki ([email protected])
Disclaimer : I use many stories that don't belong to me in this fan fic. I have neither obtained, nor asked for permission. If the owners of the various stories contact me, I will be happy to remove all mention of their property from this story. Of course those sections will be replaced with propaganda that rubs the fact you wouldn't let me use your story in your face.
Conversation Key :
[" "]=Thoughts
" " =Speaking
(" ")=Panda Signs
{" "}=Chinese
Prolog
History does NOT repeat itself.
+----------------------------------------------------------+
Genma woke up in a cold sweat. His dream he just escaped from was HORRIBLE! He knew he had one chance to make the rest of his life pleasant, and even then he might not live. What currently awaited him was a fate much worse than death though, so even he was willing to risk his life. ["The old master will NEVER have any control over my son. It will make his training that much harder, but only for him. I'll do it."] Genma thought as he rolled back over in his sleep. He would tell his son of his new plans tomorrow. For now a more pleasant dreamland awaited.
-=Next Morning=-
"Now then Ranma, our plans have changed slightly. I see now that if I taught you my school of Anything Goes Martial Arts, eventually my old master would win some authority over you. I will not allow that to happen. This means that I can't directly teach you anything. We shall travel to different dojo, some of your choice, and you will learn what they have to teach. After that you will fight me, sometimes using a style I tell you to, sometimes using whatever style you want, and sometimes using a mixture of different styles. Eventually you will create a style of your own. I will never be able to make you into a man like your mother wants, but it is a risk you will have to take for me. Do you understand son?" Genma explained.
A foul stench filled the air as Genma looked at his smiling child.
"I guess you need another diaper change..." Genma muttered as he set about changing little Ranma's soiled diaper.
-=A few years later=-
"RANMAAAAA!" Genma roared as he found his son doing something that would get them killed in the future.
Ranma was standing next to a grill, cooking okonomiyaki.
"I told you to do your best to learn martial arts, not marital arts!" Genma shouted as he charged as his son.
Ranma simply swung the oversized spatula his friend Ucchan had let him borrow to make lunch. The broad face of the weapon caught Genma in the his own face, knocking the larger man flat on his rear.
"See Pops? We won't starve, and I can still beat the crap out of you!" Ranma said happily, then went back to cooking.
Sitting in the shade of a nearby tree a father and his daughter, both wearing okonomiyaki seller's outfits, laughed at the sight before them. That and with a new wonder chef helping, their small business was doing better than ever! Too bad Ranma wasn't all that interested in marriage. Who would have thought a five year old would prevent his father from arranging a marriage for him?
-=One year later=-
"I can't teach you that style Ranma." Genma sighed as he tried to calm his excited son.
"Why not? I want to learn it!" Ranma said again as he bounced around like a caffinated grasshopper.
"Remember? I can't teach you anything, only spar with you. You have to create your own style." Genma said as he stood up and walked off, 'accidentally' dropping the training manual he had found on his way into his tent. ["I can't teach you, but if I forget to put away the manual..."] he thought to himself with a grin.
Ranma was about to wander off pouting, when he noticed a small booklet lying in the dirt near the entrance to his father's tent. He walked over and picked it up. Ranma had quickly learned to read, he had to teach himself from scrolls after all, and read the title of the book to himself as he brushed grass and dirt off of the cover. ["Neko-ken Training Manual - How to Teach the Dreaded Cat-Fist."] Ranma chuckled to himself, he knew Genma left it out on purpose. He would put himself through the training... even if it did involve throwing himself into a pit of starving cats. If he didn't think he could learn this neko-ken, he would just stop the training and move onto something else.
-=Yet Another Year Later=-
"What do you think I have to teach to you?" the old man asked.
"That nifty disguise trick you are using right now for one." Six year old Ranma said happily.
"What makes you think I have a disguise on?" the man asked, eyes showing only a hint of surprise.
"Well for one, you smell like a girl. Two, I can see that your hips are feminine. Three, your wig is on backwards."
"Oh. Well then, follow me young one. You have much to learn of the art of disguise." the young woman dressed as an old man said as she readjusted her wig.
In the background a crazy Italian ran by screaming, "I'M GONNA BE A MASTER OF DISGUISE! I'M GONNA BE A MASTER OF DISGUISE! I'M GONNA BE..."
-=Only Six Months Later=-
"Ranma! Wake up! You asked me to teach you and when I try to you fall asleep!" the woman shouted as she threw an eraser at Ranma, who appeared to be sleeping at a desk. The eraser passed harmlessly thought his head, then Ranma seemed to phase out of sight. "What the?"
"Cool! It worked!" Ranma said from his position behind his teacher.
"How did you pick up the image projection technique so quick?" the lady asked.
"You talk in your sleep."
-=Six Months Later (Is this getting old?)=-
"Ranma! How dare you leave your father like that? Have I failed to teach you to respect your elders?" Genma shouted as Ranma walked into camp.
Ranma looked up with a cat-like grin. "Actually Pops, you still haven't taught me anything."
-=Three Years Later=-
"Go forth Ranma, and make our clan proud. I never expected anyone to be able to pick up our style on ninjitsu as you have, one day you shall truly be a master of the arts." a man wrapped head to toe in black strips of cloth.
"Thank you master." Ranma said as he bowed low to the ninja. The ninja's sword came crashing down to where Ranma was bowing only moments before. Ranma currently occupied the space on top of the ninja's head, so the sword was not an issue.
As Ranma hopped off the ninja laughed and waved goodbye to his student, and best friend.
-=At This Rate Ranma Will Grow Old Fast (One Year Later)=-
"Alright Ranma, this might sting a bit." a large black man said as he sat down at a huge computer system and slipped a small disk into a drive slot.
Ranma's world blurred and he suddenly found himself inside of a dojo.
"Attack me Ranma." a man said from the other side of the room.
Ranma happily obliged. A few seconds later the beating was over.
As the real world came back into focus Ranma was breathing heavily.
The same man, minus all injuries suffered in the battle, walked up to Ranma and took the strange metal device off the boy's head. "How do you feel?" he asked.
"I know kung-fu." Ranma said to Neo.
-=11 Year Old Ranma=-
"So you see Ranma, the more mass that displaces space there is, the more gravity and time will effect them when their balance is taken." a red headed scientist explained.
"Washuu? Why don't you just say 'The bigger they are, the harder they fall' and be done with it?" Ranma asked nonchalantly.
Washuu face-faulted.
-=Four Years Later=-
"So let's see... I trained with the American Navy SEALS and Army Rangers. Then we swam to England, where I learned with the SAS. After another short swim to Germany the GSG-9 taught me all they could. In India I learned a few interesting meditations and stuff. Then running to China was a good exercise. Now tell me Pops? Out of all the places we could have spared, why the hell did you choose the one with curses?" a busty red head asked a giant panda.
("Shut up and pray that your mother never finds out about this.") Genma-panda's sign read.
-=A Few Days Later=-
"Sirs, you very lucky customers! Amazons have tournament today. After battles there is great feast in honor of the winner. Err... young sir... mam, where did panda go?" the travel guide asked Ranma-chan.
Ranma-chan pointed towards a large table of food, and sure enough, there was a large panda eating everything in sight.
"Mam, that is table for..." the guide started, before being cut off.
"I know, that is the first prize for the feast. I haven't spent almost a year and a half in China without picking up the language you know." Ranma-chan said, before walking over to challenge the young woman that was ready to brain her father.
{"You girl! This your panda?"} the purple haired girl shouted as she saw Ranma-chan approach.
"Nah, you can gut him." she said with a snort.
("Ranma! You can't be serious.") the sign Genma-panda help up read.
{"Aww, crap... looks like this one knows me. I guess I'll just have to challenge you to a fight for the prize then."} Ranma-chan said, as she acted like she was sulking.
{"Very well then. Shampoo, get back on the log. It seems there is one more fight for you today."} and old woman hopping around on a staff said. {"You, foreigner. Do not underestimate Shampoo. You may have challenged her, but it would be a shame to see blood spilt today."}
"I'll be careful. I won't hurt her too bad." Ranma-chan said with a grin.
----------
The two warriors both hopped on top of a log that was suspended in midair. It was quite large, and provided a long and narrow space to fight.
Shampoo took out her bonbori and got into a loose stance. {"Great grandmother Cologne, I will not let you down."} she whispered under her breath.
One of Ranma-chan's ears twitched when she heard this. One of the side effects of the neko-ken was enhanced senses. The recent shape shifting magic of Jusenkyo seems to have some strange effects when mixed with the neko-ken. The fact that she had cat ears and a tail supported this theory. It also seemed to make her senses even more powerful. She grinned as she heard Shampoo's statement.
Shampoo decided not to give her opponent time to begin an offensive. She rushed forward in a blur of movement, swinging her bonbori in a wide arch towards her opponent's head.
Ranma-chan grinned even wider when she saw such a forward attack being used. ["I'll give that old woman something to worry about."] she thought happily.
Shampoo hoped the foreign girl would move soon, it was too late to halt her attack. Much to her, and everyone else around, dismay her challenger made no movement. The mace smashed into the side of the red haired girl's head, sending blood, teeth, and small pieces of shattered skull flying.
Cologne sat there wide eyed. She could not believe what just happened. Shampoo was not ready to deal with the guilt of taking a life, and there was no way to survive a blow such as that.
Shampoo faltered and nearly dropped her weapons. She felt her stomach heave a few times, but she managed not to embarrass herself by spewing lunch onto the crowds. She nearly had broken into tears when she noticed that the body that had fallen off the log had vanished as it hit the ground, and the blood on her maces seemed to fade from sight.
{"You should see the look on your great grandmother's face."} a voice from behind said.
Shampoo turned around to see Ranma-chan standing there, pointing at Cologne.
Cologne was more than a little surprised. ["What kind of creature is this? Could it be a demon?"] she thought as she reappraised Ranma-chan.
Ranma-chan grinned then walked over to the stunned Shampoo. With one finger to the forehead she poked Shampoo.
Shampoo flailed about for a second then yelped as she fell towards the ground below. She was caught in the strong arms of the red-head. As she was set to the floor she knew what she had to do. She reached up and took the red-head's face in her hands and tried to place a kiss on her cheek.
Ranma-chan noticed Shampoo attempting to kiss her on the cheek. ["Time to cause some confusion."] she thought with a smirk. At the last moment she suddenly twisted her head and caught Shampoo's lips with her own.
This was NOT how things were supposed to happen. The kiss of death had turned into a rather passionate lip lock, complete with tongue on Ranma-chan's part. Shampoo found herself strangely drawn into the kiss, as she put her own tongue into play. A few seconds later reality hit her like Ryoga on a sugar high. She fell to the ground when her knees would no longer support her weight. ["Such a good kisser..."] she thought before she passed out from shock.
Cologne pogoed on her staff next to Ranma-chan and Shampoo. Her scan of the girl's aura reported that she was indeed human.
{"I'm Ranma Saotome, sorry bout this."} Ranma-chan said with a blush. ["Wow, Shampoo there gives a mean kiss!"]
{"What did you do to my great granddaughter?"} Cologne asked suspiciously. After all, there were evil humans out there.
{"Probably gave her the best kiss of her life. And she started it."} Ranma-chan replied with a giggle.
{"Very well, but how did you pull that trick on the log? I saw you get hit by her attack?"} Cologne pressed.
{"It's a simple image projection. I thought it would be fun. I guess I let it get a bit out of hand though. Sorry bout that."} Ranma-chan said, blushing and scratching the back of her head with her hand while laughing.
Shampoo regained her senses and looked up. Ranma-chan's breast were bouncing quite actively with her current pose and her laughing. Shampoo felt some unfamiliar feelings build up, then passed out again... with a nosebleed.
Cologne looked down at Shampoo. She had a nose bleed, was drooling, pretending to squeeze something in her hands, and giggling like an idiot. ["This doesn't happen every day."] she thought as she looked back at Ranma-chan. {"What would you think of a trade between us? I will teach you some Amazon techniques, and in turn you teach us some of your techniques."} she said to Ranma-chan.
{"What? No outsiders must die thing? I expected at least that much. And I'd be glad to show you some stuff, but many things I cannot. Some are secrets that I may only pass along to my heir in time."} Ranma-chan said.
{"Well, Shampoo was going to give you the kiss of death for defeating her. But I think she has other plans now. I think you can stay for a while and trade moves."} Cologne said while pointing down at Shampoo.
Ranma-chan followed Cologne's finger and saw Shampoo on the floor. Shampoo chose that moment to giggle some more and pretend to squeeze two round objects in her hands. Ranma-chan looked down at her shirt. She looked back up at Cologne, face BRIGHT red. {"No problem, can I get some hot water first?"}
-=One Year Later=-
{"We're going to Japan now honey?"} Shampoo asked eagerly.
"Yes, and stop calling me honey. You should start practicing your Japanese now too." Ranma-chan said.
"Shampoo still have trouble with strange language. It make Shampoo sound like idiot." Shampoo pouted.
"None the less, Shampoo, Ranma is right. I have the feeling we will be spending quite some time in Japan. I wish I knew why your father is suddenly so adamant about going to Japan now Ranma. Something doesn't seem right." Cologne said.
"I must take the boy to visit an old friend. If we get the chance we might even visit the boy's mother." Genma said.
Suddenly a war cry came out from above. The group looked up to see a man in a large white robe falling towards them.
Ranma-chan stepped to the side and the man landed where she was standing moments before. "What do you want Mousse?" Ranma-chan asked as Mousse jumped up.
"For corrupting Shampoo I shall kill you!" Mousse shouted.
"No fair! Mousse speak Japanese better than Shampoo!" Shampoo complained as she lazily threw a rock at Mousse.
The rock bounce off Mousse's head, doing little damage to his thick skull. "Prepare to DIE!" Mousse shouted as he threw 36 daggers, 18 throwing stars, 4 short swords, 2 yo-yos, and his mother's attempt at cooking lunch at Ranma-chan.
Ranma-chan brought up a hand and a tower shield suddenly appeared in it. She tossed the shield - now emended with 36 daggers, 18 throwing stars, 4 short swords, and a large hole where Mousse's mother's cooking ate through - to the ground, and picked up the two yo-yos. She managed to walk the dog with one on each hand. She was considering trying to create rock the twins, when Mousse threw a pepper bomb at her. She was able to smell it coming and ducked under, then whipped both of the yo-yos out. Each one impacted directly with a lens of Mousse's glasses.
Mousse wandered off shredding trees and bushes as he tried to kill Ranma-chan.
"Well, that was anti-climatic." Genma said.
"Indeed, It seems that Ranma has mastered Hidden Weapons as well as the blind idiot Mousse has. Quite the addition to the tribe." Cologne said from on top of her staff.
"Ranma saved Shampoo from stupid blind boy! Shampoo give Ranma endurance training after Ranma give Shampoo Japanese lesson tonight." Shampoo said with a silly grin on her face. "What you teach tonight Ranma?"
"Honorifics." Ranma-chan said as she looked for a rock to hide under. Shampoo's idea of endurance training involved two girls, little clothing, and lots of wrestling. ["I'm pretty much used to it, but does she have to try EVERY night?"]
+----------------------------------------------------------+
This story came to me one night driving home. I had almost received a concussion, and the story joined the ringing in my ears. I had to let it loose when I got home. So I wrote the first 8 kilobytes of this fic. Over the next few days it evolved into what it is now.
Note, most of the characters will be OOC in one way or another.
[email protected]
A Ranma ½ Fanfic
Written By : Noaki ([email protected])
Disclaimer : I use many stories that don't belong to me in this fan fic. I have neither obtained, nor asked for permission. If the owners of the various stories contact me, I will be happy to remove all mention of their property from this story. Of course those sections will be replaced with propaganda that rubs the fact you wouldn't let me use your story in your face.
Conversation Key :
[" "]=Thoughts
" " =Speaking
(" ")=Panda Signs
{" "}=Chinese
Prolog
History does NOT repeat itself.
+----------------------------------------------------------+
Genma woke up in a cold sweat. His dream he just escaped from was HORRIBLE! He knew he had one chance to make the rest of his life pleasant, and even then he might not live. What currently awaited him was a fate much worse than death though, so even he was willing to risk his life. ["The old master will NEVER have any control over my son. It will make his training that much harder, but only for him. I'll do it."] Genma thought as he rolled back over in his sleep. He would tell his son of his new plans tomorrow. For now a more pleasant dreamland awaited.
-=Next Morning=-
"Now then Ranma, our plans have changed slightly. I see now that if I taught you my school of Anything Goes Martial Arts, eventually my old master would win some authority over you. I will not allow that to happen. This means that I can't directly teach you anything. We shall travel to different dojo, some of your choice, and you will learn what they have to teach. After that you will fight me, sometimes using a style I tell you to, sometimes using whatever style you want, and sometimes using a mixture of different styles. Eventually you will create a style of your own. I will never be able to make you into a man like your mother wants, but it is a risk you will have to take for me. Do you understand son?" Genma explained.
A foul stench filled the air as Genma looked at his smiling child.
"I guess you need another diaper change..." Genma muttered as he set about changing little Ranma's soiled diaper.
-=A few years later=-
"RANMAAAAA!" Genma roared as he found his son doing something that would get them killed in the future.
Ranma was standing next to a grill, cooking okonomiyaki.
"I told you to do your best to learn martial arts, not marital arts!" Genma shouted as he charged as his son.
Ranma simply swung the oversized spatula his friend Ucchan had let him borrow to make lunch. The broad face of the weapon caught Genma in the his own face, knocking the larger man flat on his rear.
"See Pops? We won't starve, and I can still beat the crap out of you!" Ranma said happily, then went back to cooking.
Sitting in the shade of a nearby tree a father and his daughter, both wearing okonomiyaki seller's outfits, laughed at the sight before them. That and with a new wonder chef helping, their small business was doing better than ever! Too bad Ranma wasn't all that interested in marriage. Who would have thought a five year old would prevent his father from arranging a marriage for him?
-=One year later=-
"I can't teach you that style Ranma." Genma sighed as he tried to calm his excited son.
"Why not? I want to learn it!" Ranma said again as he bounced around like a caffinated grasshopper.
"Remember? I can't teach you anything, only spar with you. You have to create your own style." Genma said as he stood up and walked off, 'accidentally' dropping the training manual he had found on his way into his tent. ["I can't teach you, but if I forget to put away the manual..."] he thought to himself with a grin.
Ranma was about to wander off pouting, when he noticed a small booklet lying in the dirt near the entrance to his father's tent. He walked over and picked it up. Ranma had quickly learned to read, he had to teach himself from scrolls after all, and read the title of the book to himself as he brushed grass and dirt off of the cover. ["Neko-ken Training Manual - How to Teach the Dreaded Cat-Fist."] Ranma chuckled to himself, he knew Genma left it out on purpose. He would put himself through the training... even if it did involve throwing himself into a pit of starving cats. If he didn't think he could learn this neko-ken, he would just stop the training and move onto something else.
-=Yet Another Year Later=-
"What do you think I have to teach to you?" the old man asked.
"That nifty disguise trick you are using right now for one." Six year old Ranma said happily.
"What makes you think I have a disguise on?" the man asked, eyes showing only a hint of surprise.
"Well for one, you smell like a girl. Two, I can see that your hips are feminine. Three, your wig is on backwards."
"Oh. Well then, follow me young one. You have much to learn of the art of disguise." the young woman dressed as an old man said as she readjusted her wig.
In the background a crazy Italian ran by screaming, "I'M GONNA BE A MASTER OF DISGUISE! I'M GONNA BE A MASTER OF DISGUISE! I'M GONNA BE..."
-=Only Six Months Later=-
"Ranma! Wake up! You asked me to teach you and when I try to you fall asleep!" the woman shouted as she threw an eraser at Ranma, who appeared to be sleeping at a desk. The eraser passed harmlessly thought his head, then Ranma seemed to phase out of sight. "What the?"
"Cool! It worked!" Ranma said from his position behind his teacher.
"How did you pick up the image projection technique so quick?" the lady asked.
"You talk in your sleep."
-=Six Months Later (Is this getting old?)=-
"Ranma! How dare you leave your father like that? Have I failed to teach you to respect your elders?" Genma shouted as Ranma walked into camp.
Ranma looked up with a cat-like grin. "Actually Pops, you still haven't taught me anything."
-=Three Years Later=-
"Go forth Ranma, and make our clan proud. I never expected anyone to be able to pick up our style on ninjitsu as you have, one day you shall truly be a master of the arts." a man wrapped head to toe in black strips of cloth.
"Thank you master." Ranma said as he bowed low to the ninja. The ninja's sword came crashing down to where Ranma was bowing only moments before. Ranma currently occupied the space on top of the ninja's head, so the sword was not an issue.
As Ranma hopped off the ninja laughed and waved goodbye to his student, and best friend.
-=At This Rate Ranma Will Grow Old Fast (One Year Later)=-
"Alright Ranma, this might sting a bit." a large black man said as he sat down at a huge computer system and slipped a small disk into a drive slot.
Ranma's world blurred and he suddenly found himself inside of a dojo.
"Attack me Ranma." a man said from the other side of the room.
Ranma happily obliged. A few seconds later the beating was over.
As the real world came back into focus Ranma was breathing heavily.
The same man, minus all injuries suffered in the battle, walked up to Ranma and took the strange metal device off the boy's head. "How do you feel?" he asked.
"I know kung-fu." Ranma said to Neo.
-=11 Year Old Ranma=-
"So you see Ranma, the more mass that displaces space there is, the more gravity and time will effect them when their balance is taken." a red headed scientist explained.
"Washuu? Why don't you just say 'The bigger they are, the harder they fall' and be done with it?" Ranma asked nonchalantly.
Washuu face-faulted.
-=Four Years Later=-
"So let's see... I trained with the American Navy SEALS and Army Rangers. Then we swam to England, where I learned with the SAS. After another short swim to Germany the GSG-9 taught me all they could. In India I learned a few interesting meditations and stuff. Then running to China was a good exercise. Now tell me Pops? Out of all the places we could have spared, why the hell did you choose the one with curses?" a busty red head asked a giant panda.
("Shut up and pray that your mother never finds out about this.") Genma-panda's sign read.
-=A Few Days Later=-
"Sirs, you very lucky customers! Amazons have tournament today. After battles there is great feast in honor of the winner. Err... young sir... mam, where did panda go?" the travel guide asked Ranma-chan.
Ranma-chan pointed towards a large table of food, and sure enough, there was a large panda eating everything in sight.
"Mam, that is table for..." the guide started, before being cut off.
"I know, that is the first prize for the feast. I haven't spent almost a year and a half in China without picking up the language you know." Ranma-chan said, before walking over to challenge the young woman that was ready to brain her father.
{"You girl! This your panda?"} the purple haired girl shouted as she saw Ranma-chan approach.
"Nah, you can gut him." she said with a snort.
("Ranma! You can't be serious.") the sign Genma-panda help up read.
{"Aww, crap... looks like this one knows me. I guess I'll just have to challenge you to a fight for the prize then."} Ranma-chan said, as she acted like she was sulking.
{"Very well then. Shampoo, get back on the log. It seems there is one more fight for you today."} and old woman hopping around on a staff said. {"You, foreigner. Do not underestimate Shampoo. You may have challenged her, but it would be a shame to see blood spilt today."}
"I'll be careful. I won't hurt her too bad." Ranma-chan said with a grin.
----------
The two warriors both hopped on top of a log that was suspended in midair. It was quite large, and provided a long and narrow space to fight.
Shampoo took out her bonbori and got into a loose stance. {"Great grandmother Cologne, I will not let you down."} she whispered under her breath.
One of Ranma-chan's ears twitched when she heard this. One of the side effects of the neko-ken was enhanced senses. The recent shape shifting magic of Jusenkyo seems to have some strange effects when mixed with the neko-ken. The fact that she had cat ears and a tail supported this theory. It also seemed to make her senses even more powerful. She grinned as she heard Shampoo's statement.
Shampoo decided not to give her opponent time to begin an offensive. She rushed forward in a blur of movement, swinging her bonbori in a wide arch towards her opponent's head.
Ranma-chan grinned even wider when she saw such a forward attack being used. ["I'll give that old woman something to worry about."] she thought happily.
Shampoo hoped the foreign girl would move soon, it was too late to halt her attack. Much to her, and everyone else around, dismay her challenger made no movement. The mace smashed into the side of the red haired girl's head, sending blood, teeth, and small pieces of shattered skull flying.
Cologne sat there wide eyed. She could not believe what just happened. Shampoo was not ready to deal with the guilt of taking a life, and there was no way to survive a blow such as that.
Shampoo faltered and nearly dropped her weapons. She felt her stomach heave a few times, but she managed not to embarrass herself by spewing lunch onto the crowds. She nearly had broken into tears when she noticed that the body that had fallen off the log had vanished as it hit the ground, and the blood on her maces seemed to fade from sight.
{"You should see the look on your great grandmother's face."} a voice from behind said.
Shampoo turned around to see Ranma-chan standing there, pointing at Cologne.
Cologne was more than a little surprised. ["What kind of creature is this? Could it be a demon?"] she thought as she reappraised Ranma-chan.
Ranma-chan grinned then walked over to the stunned Shampoo. With one finger to the forehead she poked Shampoo.
Shampoo flailed about for a second then yelped as she fell towards the ground below. She was caught in the strong arms of the red-head. As she was set to the floor she knew what she had to do. She reached up and took the red-head's face in her hands and tried to place a kiss on her cheek.
Ranma-chan noticed Shampoo attempting to kiss her on the cheek. ["Time to cause some confusion."] she thought with a smirk. At the last moment she suddenly twisted her head and caught Shampoo's lips with her own.
This was NOT how things were supposed to happen. The kiss of death had turned into a rather passionate lip lock, complete with tongue on Ranma-chan's part. Shampoo found herself strangely drawn into the kiss, as she put her own tongue into play. A few seconds later reality hit her like Ryoga on a sugar high. She fell to the ground when her knees would no longer support her weight. ["Such a good kisser..."] she thought before she passed out from shock.
Cologne pogoed on her staff next to Ranma-chan and Shampoo. Her scan of the girl's aura reported that she was indeed human.
{"I'm Ranma Saotome, sorry bout this."} Ranma-chan said with a blush. ["Wow, Shampoo there gives a mean kiss!"]
{"What did you do to my great granddaughter?"} Cologne asked suspiciously. After all, there were evil humans out there.
{"Probably gave her the best kiss of her life. And she started it."} Ranma-chan replied with a giggle.
{"Very well, but how did you pull that trick on the log? I saw you get hit by her attack?"} Cologne pressed.
{"It's a simple image projection. I thought it would be fun. I guess I let it get a bit out of hand though. Sorry bout that."} Ranma-chan said, blushing and scratching the back of her head with her hand while laughing.
Shampoo regained her senses and looked up. Ranma-chan's breast were bouncing quite actively with her current pose and her laughing. Shampoo felt some unfamiliar feelings build up, then passed out again... with a nosebleed.
Cologne looked down at Shampoo. She had a nose bleed, was drooling, pretending to squeeze something in her hands, and giggling like an idiot. ["This doesn't happen every day."] she thought as she looked back at Ranma-chan. {"What would you think of a trade between us? I will teach you some Amazon techniques, and in turn you teach us some of your techniques."} she said to Ranma-chan.
{"What? No outsiders must die thing? I expected at least that much. And I'd be glad to show you some stuff, but many things I cannot. Some are secrets that I may only pass along to my heir in time."} Ranma-chan said.
{"Well, Shampoo was going to give you the kiss of death for defeating her. But I think she has other plans now. I think you can stay for a while and trade moves."} Cologne said while pointing down at Shampoo.
Ranma-chan followed Cologne's finger and saw Shampoo on the floor. Shampoo chose that moment to giggle some more and pretend to squeeze two round objects in her hands. Ranma-chan looked down at her shirt. She looked back up at Cologne, face BRIGHT red. {"No problem, can I get some hot water first?"}
-=One Year Later=-
{"We're going to Japan now honey?"} Shampoo asked eagerly.
"Yes, and stop calling me honey. You should start practicing your Japanese now too." Ranma-chan said.
"Shampoo still have trouble with strange language. It make Shampoo sound like idiot." Shampoo pouted.
"None the less, Shampoo, Ranma is right. I have the feeling we will be spending quite some time in Japan. I wish I knew why your father is suddenly so adamant about going to Japan now Ranma. Something doesn't seem right." Cologne said.
"I must take the boy to visit an old friend. If we get the chance we might even visit the boy's mother." Genma said.
Suddenly a war cry came out from above. The group looked up to see a man in a large white robe falling towards them.
Ranma-chan stepped to the side and the man landed where she was standing moments before. "What do you want Mousse?" Ranma-chan asked as Mousse jumped up.
"For corrupting Shampoo I shall kill you!" Mousse shouted.
"No fair! Mousse speak Japanese better than Shampoo!" Shampoo complained as she lazily threw a rock at Mousse.
The rock bounce off Mousse's head, doing little damage to his thick skull. "Prepare to DIE!" Mousse shouted as he threw 36 daggers, 18 throwing stars, 4 short swords, 2 yo-yos, and his mother's attempt at cooking lunch at Ranma-chan.
Ranma-chan brought up a hand and a tower shield suddenly appeared in it. She tossed the shield - now emended with 36 daggers, 18 throwing stars, 4 short swords, and a large hole where Mousse's mother's cooking ate through - to the ground, and picked up the two yo-yos. She managed to walk the dog with one on each hand. She was considering trying to create rock the twins, when Mousse threw a pepper bomb at her. She was able to smell it coming and ducked under, then whipped both of the yo-yos out. Each one impacted directly with a lens of Mousse's glasses.
Mousse wandered off shredding trees and bushes as he tried to kill Ranma-chan.
"Well, that was anti-climatic." Genma said.
"Indeed, It seems that Ranma has mastered Hidden Weapons as well as the blind idiot Mousse has. Quite the addition to the tribe." Cologne said from on top of her staff.
"Ranma saved Shampoo from stupid blind boy! Shampoo give Ranma endurance training after Ranma give Shampoo Japanese lesson tonight." Shampoo said with a silly grin on her face. "What you teach tonight Ranma?"
"Honorifics." Ranma-chan said as she looked for a rock to hide under. Shampoo's idea of endurance training involved two girls, little clothing, and lots of wrestling. ["I'm pretty much used to it, but does she have to try EVERY night?"]
+----------------------------------------------------------+
This story came to me one night driving home. I had almost received a concussion, and the story joined the ringing in my ears. I had to let it loose when I got home. So I wrote the first 8 kilobytes of this fic. Over the next few days it evolved into what it is now.
Note, most of the characters will be OOC in one way or another.
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