Issues by digthewriter

Summary: Taking the step from being friends to wanting to become lovers is hard, especially when the parties involved are nearly always drunk when they hang out.

Notes: This is a series of drabbles with 9 parts that equate to a 1000 words written when the author was predominantly intoxicated. I hope you enjoy all the angst.

Chapter 1

"Potter, I'm drunk."

Harry laughed at the statement. It wasn't the first time he'd heard it, and it wouldn't have been the last. Malfoy just had this habit of announcing his intoxicated level before he'd come on to Harry. Who knows why? Maybe if Malfoy hit on Harry when he was drunk, he'd think that it didn't really mean it.

Because if Harry were sober and Malfoy were sober, it would mean something.

"Time to call the Knight Bus, I suppose," Harry commented, as he always did. They were drunk. Malfoy, was drunk, and it was time to go home.

Chapter 2

"Your place or mine?" Malfoy asked.

"You'll go to yours, and I'll go to mine," Harry said, as they always did. Because that was the ritual. They were drunk and that was all. Even if Harry wanted to press Malfoy against the side of the building, nudge his knee in between Malfoy's sexy, thin legs and just writhe against him. Right then and there.

"You are never any fun," Malfoy complained.

"Yet you keep insisting on seeing me," Harry teased and pulled Malfoy away from the pub, the crowd, to a quiet corner and they waited for the Knight Bus.

Chapter 3

"I keep insisting on seeing you because..." Malfoy hiccuped, "...because... maybe I was trying to tell you..."

Harry chuckled. "Whatever it is, Malfoy, it'll have to wait until morning."

"No!" Malfoy seemed rather resolute. "I need to tell you this now, Potter, because you just don't seem to get it. You don't seem to understand what it is I'm trying to say-"

"I love you." Harry caught himself blurting out. "Wait...what? No..." Did he just say all of that outloud?

"I'm sorry," Malfoy said, stumbling as he approached Harry and then the Knight Bus pulled up.

"Come on, then."

Chapter 4

The Knight Bus driver looked as though he were on the last of his nerve. Malfoy stood there staring at Harry, and Harry was shocked that he'd actually been dumb enough, drunk enough, to somewhat confess to Malfoy about his feelings.

There was so much more he wanted to say. He wanted to say that he cared for Malfoy and didn't want to be a drunk shag. He didn't want to be disregarded in the morning as Malfoy would think that it had been a mistake. Instead, he's just uttered the three words that would just now, end their friendship.

Chapter 5

They finally got on the Bus and it took off. Damn, Harry should have taken a sobering up potion because the way the bus moved, he was sure he was going to vomit on Malfoy.

"Did you mean it like a friend?" Malfoy asked when Harry finally settled in.

"What?"

Malfoy looked slightly disappointed. "You love me, like a friend. That's why you didn't want to come to my place?"

"Right, of course," Harry said more to himself, and then Malfoy stiffened next to him. Well, Harry. It's now or never. "I meant it more than a friend," he added.

Chapter 6

"I don't want to come to your place because you only invite me over when you're drunk—"

Malfoy opened his mouth to say something, but Harry cut him off.

"And before you say that it's only because you only get the courage to invite me when you're drunk, well, that isn't exactly reassuring, either."

"How come you don't invite me…places?" Malfoy asked, sounding confused, and still very drunk.

Harry chuckled. "I invite you all the time, Malfoy. Most of the times, you bring your friends, they spend half their time insulting me, and you spend the time getting drunk."

Chapter 7

Malfoy look as though he'd been stunned silent. Of course, he was drunk, drunker than Harry, so Harry figured it would just take him longer to process what he'd said and realise the meaning.

"You… Those were dates?"

Harry laughed. "No, but I'd hoped after one invitation, I'd ask you out on a proper date and of course, that never happened."

The bus came to a screeching halt; it was time for Harry to get out.

"Well, I'll see you then, Malfoy." Without a glance backwards, Harry stepped out of the Knight Bus and started to walk his way home.

Chapter 8

The silence of the night was finally becoming too much. Harry had no idea when and where his life took a turn and he was no longer in control of it. He went from the boy that was cherished to the boy that no one ever wanted.

It was all too much. What he required of people in a relationship was all too much. He was doomed.

Doomed to be alone. Forever.

What was it about him that just made men run the other way? He was too much. Too much to handle. Too much to love.

Yeah. Doomed, alright.

Chapter 9

Disappointed at how the night had turned out, and at his own actions to outing himself to Malfoy, Harry stripped off his clothes and crashed on the bed.

His dreams weren't any better. He constantly dreamt of chasing after a train, a car, or a bus, and missing it.

Harry woke up with a bad headache and a heart that hurt. Merlin, he really needed to snap out of it. This wasn't his first rejection, but this one had hurt because it'd been Malfoy.

He was glad it was a Saturday and he could just relax; not think about how much he'd fucked up. He made his way to the front door to grab Saturday's edition of the Prophet. His wards were secure and he'd restricted communication via Floo so the paper was delivered to his doorstep.

Much to his surprise, when Harry bent down to grab the paper, he saw a set of limbs walk up to him. His gaze followed from the shiny shoes, to the finely pressed trousers, to hands that held two cups of coffee.

The hands of course, belonged to Malfoy. Was he still asleep? Was this another nightmare?

"Potter, fancy a coffee?" Malfoy said.

Closing Notes: This is it for now. The story will continue in November.