BRINGING BACK MEMORIES

AUTHOR'S NOTE/DISCLAIMER

This is my take on what Herrmann's thoughts were when he heard about Gabby losing the baby in "Your Day Is Coming". Chicago Fire belongs to Dick Wolf and NBC.

Christopher Herrmann felt like he had been punched in the gut when he heard the news. She had lost the baby. Gabby had lost her baby. It was hands down the most horrible news in the world. Unable to help himself, the man's mind went back.

Cindy sobbed when she heard the news. She had lost her baby. She had lost her chance. Christopher just stared. It couldn't be real.

"Doc, are you sure?" he asked, his voice desperate.

"I am. And I'm so sorry. I wish I could tell you different," their doctor-Matthew Fairbanks-responded. Cindy just sobbed. She couldn't believe this was happening. What did I do wrong? I followed all of their instructions, she thought.

"Thank you, Doctor," Christopher stated as he pulled his wife close to him. "I'm right here, Baby," he murmured. He wasn't going anywhere.

With a heavy sigh, the man forced the memories away. That had been a horrible time, but fortunately, it hadn't lasted and now he and Cindy had five beautiful children. That didn't mean that he didn't wonder every once in a while about the little girl that they had nearly had. What would she have been like? Would she have been all girly? Or would she have been a tomboy? Would she have grown up to be a lawyer or a doctor? Or would she have decided to be a homemaker like Cindy had? Yes, even now he still wondered about that occasionally. And now Gabby and Matt would always be wondering about this particular child. And there was nothing he could do except be there for them. But he just wasn't sure what to say. There wasn't anything he could say. Nothing would make this better, he knew that. He wanted to take away the crappy feeling that they both had, but he knew that he couldn't. And that sucked. That really sucked…

AUTHOR'S NOTE 2

I have no experience in losing a child, so I really hope my take on it was in good taste. I tried to get into Herrmann's head and what he may have been feeling in this moment, and if I failed in that, let me know please. To those who have lost a child, I'm sorry for your loss and I hope that this didn't bring up any bad memories.