Time was...

Time wasn't time when one stood by the gate.

It had to be that way. There were over a hundred souls lost a minute in the world rotting above her? How was she expected to keep up with the demand when it was never as simple to judge a soul as it was to kill one? No, if time passed as it was meant, then she'd still be seeing innocents with boils and open wounds, preaching about a god who didn't save them from the sickness.

At the memory, the more humane part of the immortal could've wept. The plague had brought such horrid, oozing wounds… a bitter smell… children… woman… no one was spared.

But just as quickly as the moment came, that more humane part was gone.

Vera wandered aimlessly yet with purpose, barely taking note of the sobbing humans waiting their turn. It wasn't until she passed a child that she paused, blinking down at small features and blurred blue eyes. "Why do you cry, little one," she wondered. "Are you frightened?"

The child, a perfect aryan daughter, sniffed and wiped a hand down her face. "I w'nt my mama," she murmured in a thick accent, perhaps in a new language altogether, but to the immortal it meant nothing. It all sounded the same to her ears. "I do not know… where has she gone?"

The order of judgment was important in a way most could not fathom – so all Vera could do was lean down, taking the child's hand in her own and giving a tight squeeze. "Oh? Do you remember where you last saw your mama?" she questioned softly, trying not to react when the youngling practically leapt forward, clinging to her flesh with all her weakened might.

There was lace around her chest, and the child blinked stunning blue eyes up at her through it. "Yes, miss, we were on the bus," she shrugged, nuzzling her face closer still. "We were travelling to town. Mama needed to go to the market."

"Yes… the bus…" a male whispered beside her, frowning as though he was struggling to remember something. "I was on my way to the bank."

It took only a quick look around to take note of the others surrounding the child, to notice the similar features and colorations, and how they all seemed… surprised, shocked, stoically still. There was something about seeing people… about seeing them before they understood, seeing them still trying to come to terms with where they were, and what had happened.

There was something about it that hurt?

Vera blinked hard at the confusion thrumming around her, straightening up and looking down at the child. "The bus…" she whispered, swallowing the feeling of anguish growing in her chest. It was the first time she'd felt such a sting while looking at tear soaked features. Vera was not meant to care about those she judged. "Your mama was on the bus… but you can't find her now?"

The pain of losing a child would be pure agony, Vera imagined. It was more than life, it was a life you created inside your own person. It would be like losing a limb, like losing your soul mate, like losing your own mind. Yet, if this child's mother was not among the ones here then…

"Maybe… maybe your mama is at the market?" Vera offered weakly, smiling at the child. "You'll be there soon too. Just walk a little further."

It was a blatant lie, and the words hung thick in her throat and in the air around her lips – yet the child grew hopeful, perking up and glancing around as though she could catch a glimpse of the promise. It was unknown when the child would see her mama again, but if she was not here, then she'd survived whatever crash had occurred above. If she was not here, then she was alive.

Vera could not bare to look at the child much longer, her eyes somehow tearing themselves away without her permission. It wasn't ideal, being affected by loss – being affected by her own domain – but in the back of her mind, she was almost pleased.

It had been years now, decades, centuries… she'd lost count… but finally, she could look someone in the eye and understand.

Understand their agony.

The line was long and tedious, apparently without end, but she knew that she only had to keep walking. It wasn't like her feet would tire from the journey. It wasn't like her mind would begin to wander without something to keep her attention. It wasn't like she cared to waste time with idle wandering. It wasn't like she had other places to be.

Vera blinked at that, curious when she felt breath ghosting along her nape. It seemed she was not alone. "You should not stray from the path, my – " The air behind her was empty, and the line of humanity unmoved. "… my child?"

How peculiar.

Vera studied the space around her curiously, one hand coming up to wipe the back of her neck. If she concentrated, she could still feel the warmth on the skin there, could feel the moisture that gathered when someone exhaled too close to glass or skin. "Odd…" she murmured, forcing her hand back to her side. It wouldn't do to linger on the occurrence. "Very odd."

Beginning her absent journey once again, she couldn't help but feel as though someone was beside her as she walked – someone constantly in her presence, without being there at all. It was like she had a companion… a friendly ghost…

The gate seemed pleased to see her in its own odd way. Vera had created it, so maybe it thought of her as one would think of their mother? The thought didn't throw her much, and absently she wondered if the gate would be the only child she'd ever have. It was unlikely she'd find anyone above to love her in the way she'd demand, and even less likely she'd find someone below.

In the world above there was only humans and arrogant, murderous monsters. In the world below there was only death.

Vera doubted anyone would love a being that represented their worst nightmare.

It didn't matter anyway, she realized, taking her place beside the gate. This was her world, where she ruled from a throne made of shadows and wore a crown made of thorns. It wouldn't do to have a distraction from her duties. It wouldn't do to have to create space for someone not meant to exist beside her – not worth changing the way it was meant to be.

Death settled into her throne. "Step forward," she cooed softly, watching as a young boy hobbled towards them. It took only a second to read him, to flick through the pages of his life and find the measures to judge. "Young soldier, do you understand what has happened?"

Blood.

Battlefield.

Bullets.

He can't have been more than twenty-five, his eyes still not quite fitting into his features. "I'm dead, aren't I?" he realized, speaking more to himself than to his judge. "This is hell then?"

Death felt her lips curl up into a smile. "Oh no, this is the beginning," she announced, both hands out at her sides. There was something sparking energy within her, something making her feel alive almost. "You fought in the war. Why?"

The boys chin lifted. "My father was a soldier like me. He was proud when I enlisted," he informed her, smug he knew the man while she didn't. "Died on the battlefield a few years back. I followed him into that war and looks like I followed him out."

Blood on his hands.

Battlefield he added too

Bullets he aimed into others

Death screwed up her pretty features, almost annoyed at her creations input. That was the gates downfall, was it not? It couldn't see past crime and into reason and emotion. It saw murder, not revenge on the rapist who ruined someone's life. It saw adultery, not a loveless marriage.

"You obeyed your superiors and they let you die," Death mocked, tilting her head this way and that. "I believe betrayal is punishment enough. You may move on. Next," she waved the soul onwards with a hand, not caring much for the way he smiled. It wasn't her duty to make people happy, but to keep the balance of black and white. It didn't matter to her if he wanted to go to hell or not.

At the words however, the gate flared to life in argument. Wrong, it simpered childishly, wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong –

Death held up a clenched fist. "My judgement is not questioned," she barked out, feeling long nails bite into her palms. The pain it caused was odd, and with a sharp exhale, she gingerly touched the four bloody crescent moons in her palm. "Now I - Now I do believe we are done here. Next."

Why did that hurt?

Why was she bleeding?

The breath hit the back of her neck again, and struggling to calm her beating heart, she raised a hand to her skin. It was wet with condensation once more, like someone was standing to close. Death took back her hand, swallowing as she struggled to understand why it felt like –

Blood. There was blood on her hands.

"What's happening?" a small voice questioned, and – shocked it wasn't her own that had asked – Death looked up from her bloodied hands. It was a young child, one with eyes far too big for his features, and her chest tightened at the sight. How many children did she judge every day? How had she never noticed they were different from the older people? The boy looked around with confusion painted on his face. "Where am I? Who are you? Where's my dad?"

Death felt her mouth open to answer, felt her hands slickly rub against each other, felt her neck drip with what she now knew as blood. "I do not…" she started, swallowing hard when her voice broke. "You are dead, child."

Large brown eyes welled up with tears, not so much understanding, as fearful. "What does that mean?"

God, her neck was burning? Death rubbed at it again, knowing she shouldn't but trying hard to ease the sting. "It means you are dead, I don't know what – " Brown eyes. Brown eyes. Brown eyes. "I don't know what…"

As though sensing her distraction, the gate moved to take control, judging the child before allowing him through to the afterlife. It was the right decision – no child could sin with purpose – and absently she praised it, feeling warmth surround her as her own creation tried to sooth her fears. It was more than she expected from the gate, but still not right?

There was warmth from magic, not from arms wrapped around her in an awkward embrace. There was some form of sympathy, or at least what she assumed was sympathy from the gate but not genuine concern. There was only the duty in the gates magic not love, not her Se –

Vera felt her eyes snap open, not even sure when she'd closed them.

"Seth!"

Seth had listened when they told him to let go of her body, to let them take it away from his sight. He had listened when they told him she wasn't gone, she was still alive, she was still with him, just not physically. He had listened when they told him to get in the car and go home.

He just wasn't listening now, and they could suck it.

"Seth, please open the door? You've been in there for hours…" Leah sounded almost desperate, knuckles banging against the bathroom door. It was easy enough to slink under the bath water, to muffle her words until they made no sense to his ears. "Come on, can you at least eat something? You haven't even touched the dinner mum made us. It's your favorite."

Staring at the ceiling, feeling the water buck up against his ears and flick onto his face, the boy didn't listen. It was his time now – his time to go over the past eight hours, his time to work through this new reality.

Vera couldn't die, he knew that, but she did.

Vera said she wouldn't leave him, but she did.

Vera should have come back by now but…

Where was she?

Seth blinked almost lazily, floating in both mind and body. "I'll eat later…" he yelled absently, knowing his sister would still somewhat struggle to hear the words through the walls. That was one of the many benefits to living in an old house – the walls were thick wood, and the bathtub was an old and gaudy ceramic, large enough for his thickening frame. "Go away."

Leah sighed dramatically, then stormed back down the stairs, finally leaving him alone after hours of demanding attention.

Once everything was silent, Seth grabbed the edges of the tub, not really caring when the old thing creaked and his knuckles turned white. It was getting harder and harder to smother down the part of him that was angry. The part that wasn't so much grieving as it was fuming – ready to raise hell the minute his imprint was back in sight and within reach, because she said she wouldn't leave and she lied.

Vera had made the promise seriously enough, had claimed to understand the finer workings of how imprinting worked, but he felt stupid for believing her so easily. He felt stupid because he'd believed her, and now, where was she?

Underneath the earth with that stupid three headed dog? Chilling at the gates of hell with a pitchfork and horns?

Seth growled audibly before dunking his head under the water, letting the sound come out as bubbles instead – wrecking the surface with messy ripples. It blurred his view, hid the dirty white walls and blinding décor scattered about, but it didn't hide the figure now looming over him. It made whoever it was harder to see, the shape of a tall lean body contorted and coherently wrong, but it didn't make him blind.

Bursting out of the water with a splash, the youth was ready to rip a new one into whoever the hell had tried to – "Vera?" he realized, only now recognizing the lean shape. It didn't take long after that, however, for the shock to drift into more dangerous territory. It didn't take long for that small humming relief to turn into a furious scream. Seth carefully leant back in the water, placing a burning smile on his face. "You're back, huh?"

Back from when you left me.

Back from the lie you told.

Vera either didn't pick up on the darker tone or chose to ignore it as shock colored her features. "You're naked," she stated dumbly, blinking slowly for a few seconds before hurrying to look at the ceiling instead. "I apologize. I didn't check, I – I didn't think to check where you were or – I apologize."

Seth nodded absently, strangely unworried about his naked body and the clear water covering it. "You didn't check what?" he wondered, swallowing down more irritation. "Didn't check on me? Didn't check on me when you died, or maybe even during the eight or so hours after that?"

The immortal seemed even more startled now. "I… I apologize, but I… but there – "

"You scared the shit out of me, Vee!" Seth exploded both in tone and body, ripping his way out and up. It made the woman start back in shock, made the embodiment of death widen her eyes in panic. It was almost satisfying to see, and any other day he might've laughed. Here was Death, running to hide from a teenage boy in an overly cramped bathroom. "You died? You died, you left me."

Her back hit the basin with a crack, and the immortal gave a wince. "I apologize, Seth but calm down please, I am back," she soothed loudly, reaching out one hand to brush it across his cheek. "I tried to come back as quickly as I could… but it is difficult…"

Seth turned his head into her touch. "Difficult?" he bit out, eyes still hard. "That seems like a good word to explain my day."

Vera wasn't stupid, slowly taking her hand back and keeping her head to the side. It was the same way to confront a vicious wolf – bare your neck and appear as small as possible – and part of him was almost pleased she was finally treating him like the threat he could be. "I am never meant to leave below, do you understand this? I struggle to remember reasons why I should… I forget and…"

The youth knew it was a valid excuse, knew he should understand that she had logic and reason on her side but… "You. Left."

Finally taking her weight away from the sink, the immortal dared to come closer, hushing him softly. "Perhaps I did, but know it was not by choice," she murmured gently, holding up both arms almost obnoxiously before settling them around his shoulders. It took him a few seconds to sink into her body, to smell the silken scent attached to her hair and neck. "But by choice, I am back. I am sorry it took me so long."

Seth groaned and wrapped his arms around her body, almost sobbing into the curve of her neck. "Never do that to me again," he commanded weakly, forcing himself to pull back and meet her eyes. Silver swirled back to him, humming almost audibly. "You do not leave me."

Vera gave a sigh. "Love, you know I cannot promise that," she whispered. "I do not want to leave you again but…"

It was hard to force his eyes open but when he managed, he blinked up at his imprint, tears burning the back of his throat. Seth knew she couldn't promise something like that – she was an immortal being who ruled the underworld – but god, he wanted to hear the words so badly. He didn't want to know that he might have too… that he might have too…

Jesus, it had hurt enough today, living without knowing when she'd come back to him. It wasn't something he could do again, especially not with how their bond grew stronger with every passing minute – not when he didn't know when she'd come home.

Vera pressed the first kiss to his lips so gently he almost didn't feel it. It was a comforting touch, he realized that much, the immortal trying to take care of him in a way she knew would work.

It was comforting.

But it wasn't enough.

Seth slammed their lips together, not caring much when the immortal stumbled against him with a muffled sound of surprise. It was nice to hold her weight, to feel the full form in his arms while he felt soft lips against his own. It let him feel like he was the one taking care of her, rather than the other way around – let him feel like she relied on him for safety and protection, rather than the other way around.

Let him feel like he was needed…

Twin hands cupped his cheeks, forcing their lips apart, and he almost whined at the loss. "Seth," she breathed, tipping his chin up and meeting his eyes. "I missed you too, but perhaps you ought to get out of the bathtub and get dressed? I don't think your mother would be comfortable with this and neither would you, if it weren't for your overload of emotions."

Her pupils were dilated.

That – that's what happened when someone was – Seth swallowed audibly, tightening his grip on her shirt. Dilated pupils meant, well, interest, right? It meant she was more than happy to kiss him. "Are you comfortable with this?" he wondered quietly.

Vera's eyes flashed, suddenly and completely gold for a beat of her heart. "Define the question," she asked softly, tracing his lower lip with her thumb. It made another sound build in his throat, something torn between a whine and a growl, and she chuckled at the reaction, leaning closer to rest her forehead against his. "I enjoy… intimacy with you, Seth, if that's what you're asking. Touching you is no task to me."

It ain't a fucking task for me either…

Seth could almost feel the heat slowly coiling in his stomach, feel how it spread down his hips and into the part of him… the part… the part that was insistently pressed against the curve of her waist. "Um, that's uh, that's just… it's…"

"Intimacy?" Gold eyes were bright and teasing. "Youth?"

Now the heat was in his cheeks, burning up his face until he could almost feel the embarrassment. Where was the courage he'd felt five seconds ago? The strength that had coursed through him when he'd smashed their bodies together? Seth swallowed hard, slowly correcting his grip until he held the firm skin above her ass. "Interest," he offered tightly, forcing calm unto his voice. Everything in his gut told him to angle his hips away from her to ease the awkward situation, but instead he pressed them close still. "Interest in you."

Vera's brow lifted. "Interest, hm? You may have all the interest you want, but it is against your laws to act on them," she reminded him, already tugging away from his grip. "Now, let's get you dressed and in bed. You look exhausted."

No.

Not yet.

Seth shook his head, easily holding her still. "No, a little longer," he commanded idly, pressing another kiss to her jawline. "Please?" It was almost funny he'd even added the begging word onto the end, when it was clear that – immortal or not – she was struggling against his strength. "Just let me hold you, kay?"

Vera breathed out a sigh, slumping against him before awkwardly wriggling about, apparently remembering that; "You're still naked…"

"I was having a bath," he argued, mind already thinking up probably the stupidest idea he'd ever had. It would only be bonding time, making up for the vacation they'd lost to the fight. "Did you, uh…" The water was still warm, steam swirling up from it. "Did you wanna join me?"

The immortal apparently thought he was teasing, letting out a tinkling laugh until she noticed he was edging towards the bath. "Seth…" she warned, eyes flashing to molten. It made electricity shoot down his spine, a breathless grin commanding his features. "I strongly recommend you do not continue with what you're thinking. I do not take to water while clothed."

Seth slowly sat down on the edge of the bathtub, still grinning as he peered up into gold eyes. "Don't be clothed then?"

Vera's brow danced down for a split second, confusion and panic littering her features. "I do not think that's wise…" she whispered, closing her eyes before attempting to pull away. "I have promised to let you hit the right age before I… before we…"

"Hey, nothing needs to happen?" Seth hurried to sooth her fraying nerves. "I'm not asking for that, I promise. I just wanna have some quiet time with you. Look why don't you wear my shirt," he offered, scooping up the material and pressing it to her chest. "You can wear your… um, your undergarments, if you feel more comfortable and I can put on mine but…"

Vera hushed him with a quiet smile, the edges of her lips quivering nervously. "Some time with you sounds nice, but," she frowned, biting her lip before looking at the door. "Sue would not approve."

"Nothing needs to happen, nothing will happen," Seth promised. "I just need some time. I lost you today and…"

The immortal nodded, letting out a slow breath. "I lost you as well," Vera agreed, cupping his cheeks with the most mournful expression he'd ever seen on her beautiful face. "I think this would be good for both of us – as long as we take measures to ensure your purity," she added quickly, not seeming to care when he choked at the word. "I think… I think it would be okay to lay with you in the water."

Seth started to argue – purity, what the fuck – before the soft shift of fabric sounded, stealing his voice away before he could say a word. Vera didn't seem to care, gently folding her shirt and placing it on the basin before moving to unbuckle thick pants.

Holy fucking shit.

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I'm not gonna bother saying guess who's back or I have an excuse. I don't really? I do work full time now, but that doesn't mean I can't update more regularly, so I'm sorry I keep you guys waiting all the time.

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