A/N: So, I participated in a Ron/Hermione fest over on Tumblr recently, with a max word count of 2,000. You can check it out by Googling "romionesmut tumblr." Tons of stories went up for ten different prompts, all posted anonymously, and the masses voted for their favorites. When the prompt options went up, I immediately lost my mind and decided to write one fic that included all ten prompts. I opened a doc and spent the next hour or so typing this mess out, then editing down to precisely 2,000 words. I honestly didn't even know if I would submit it, because it was mostly for my own personal amusement... But then I decided it could fit into the prompt that concludes the fic, so I submitted.
The craziest part about this fic is that it is literally a sequel to a fic I have only written in my own personal drafts. So, at some point, it is likely that I will post a prequel to this fic, that was actually written prior to it... Are you blinking at me?
Here are the ten prompts, all of which you will find in this clustercuss of a story!
Prefect's bathroom, backseat of a car, bedroom in new flat, St. Mungo's, Quidditch stadium, library, kitchen counter, lift, desk at work, Hermione's childhood bedroom.
Thank you to Jes / jesrod82 for solo hosting this fest - great job on your first one!
I think posting this fic right now is me forcing myself to reinstate "fic Friday," which I was doing so well with for a minute... posting some amount of fic every Friday. Hey, it's still Friday somewhere right now!
"I swear I'll never drink anything George gives me, ever again!"
Hermione gasped and sat up straight, staring across the Prefect's bath as Ron panted, hands on his knees, by the door.
"What-" she started, soap sliding off her naked breasts. His eyes flicked down before he shook himself and straightened, jogging over to her.
"Ron, what- how are you here right now?!"
"I'm sorry," he cringed, stopping by the side of the tub. "Had to see you."
Her widened eyes softened, and no matter the reason, she was thrilled to see him, too. It had been a month since Christmas, and she'd bloody missed him. A smile flickered across her face before she furrowed her brow.
"Ron, why-"
"Remember the first time we, uh… shagged? That sodding potion you accidentally drank in your tea at George's?"
She swallowed, blushing at the memory.
"Of course…"
"Well, he's fucking done it again."
Everything suddenly made sense. George had once spiked her tea, to test a new product in his adult line… a potion that sent you apparating to random locations every few minutes, until you had sex.
"Oh, God…"
"Yeah..."
"How long ago did you drink it?" she asked, already climbing out of the tub. His eyes glazed over as her naked body emerged from the water. "Ron! Pay attention!"
"Shit, sorry... Shit! Alright, it's been-" he glanced at his watch "-twenty minutes. Came here the second I realised what was happening-"
"Okay, stop talking," she said, grabbing ahold of his wrist, "and start unzipping."
"Blimey…" He licked his lips, looking her over again. A grin spread across his face. "Fuck, it's good to see you."
She couldn't help but grin back.
"You should put some clothes on," he added, "in case we end up apparating in the middle of a cafe, or something."
She groaned and closed her eyes.
"After you shag me, we're going to kill George."
"Deal."
She reached for her skirt and vest, and he helped her dress quickly, leaving her bra and knickers behind. But suddenly, an often recited line from Hogwarts: A History occurred to her.
"Wait-" but he read her mind.
"Yeah, George told me, as I was escaping his flat, that if I came here, to Hogwarts, where we can't apparate in or out, then the potion won't expire. Which means we have to go off the grounds for it to start."
"Ron, I love your brother, but I also really, really hate him."
"Same."
"Right. Let's go."
They walked briskly across the moonlit grounds, approaching the gates.
"It's been half an hour," Ron said. "Bet it'll take us as soon as we cross over."
She held his hand tightly, and they stepped through...
...instantly apparating, against their will, directly into the backseat of a car, parked in a dark garage. Ron grunted as they toppled onto the seats, attempting to hold his weight off Hermione as she flattened to her back.
"Well, this is cozy," he smirked.
"At least we're alone. Better hurry."
She licked her lips as he pushed up onto his knees, between her legs, grasping her waist in both hands, sliding his thumbs up under the sides of her vest. She reached quickly for the crotch of his jeans, unzipping and running her fingers feather lightly across the prominent bulge in his cotton pants.
"Well, I'm ready," he swallowed, trembling. "You?"
She laughed as he grinned and lowered himself over her, crushing her body just enough with a measured portion of his weight, angling his open mouth to hers as she closed her eyes. His tongue slid across her bottom lip, and she clenched her thighs around his hips. She tangled one hand into his hair as she clutched his back with the other, forcing him closer. But he separated from her lips and arched slightly away, awkwardly sliding down on his knees until his face was level with her breasts. Puffing out a quick breath, he ducked and fastened his teeth to her hardened nipple, through her thin vest. Her nails raked across his scalp before her fist tightened in his hair.
"Missed you, so much," she sighed.
His left hand slid up the outside of her thigh, baring her leg as he pushed her skirt up. He imprinted her sensitive skin with his long fingers, curling against her flesh. He'd just closed his mouth completely around her nipple, sucking gently, when she felt it.
"Ron!"
They disapparated, his hand clutching her thigh much tighter, as he felt it, too.
With a thud, they landed directly on top of a bed, a dim glow of candlelight flickering nearby.
"What the hell!" someone shouted roughly.
Ron blinked and lifted his head from Hermione's chest, suddenly face to face with-
"Harry?!"
Harry's perfectly round, bespectacled eyes blinked back.
"Get out!" Hermione shouted at Harry, breathless.
Harry's eyes darted between them, bewildered.
"What the bloody-"
"Harry," Ron interrupted, trapped between Hermione's legs, "I'll owe you big, but you've gotta leave, mate."
Frozen in place, Harry made no signs of comprehension.
"It's George," Ron sighed, frustratedly. "He's spiked my tea, and I've gotta shag Hermione, immediately-"
"Enough!" Harry shouted, suddenly coming to and leaping off the bed. "Explain later! Ugh."
He bolted from the room, and Hermione pressed her lips tight together.
"Where were we?" Ron asked quickly, releasing her thigh to roll her nipple between his perfect fingers... before slipping his hand down between her legs. "Thought Harry might have ruined the mood," he teased, as she blushed.
"So embarrassing..."
"He'll forgive us."
He slid a long finger slowly inside her, his lips parting as she moaned with pleasure.
"God, you're gorgeous."
"Wait!" she suddenly shouted. "We can get his invisibility-"
They disapparated with an echoing crack, arriving on a landing just outside the third floor of St. Mungo's, judging from the informational card labeling the doorway.
"-cloak," she breathed, defeated.
"At least this stairwell's empty."
She sighed as he lowered his lips to her neck, slowly slipping his finger out of her and adjusting his pants. She tightened her grip on his hips, her legs wrapping more securely around his waist. He shifted over her until she could feel his now bare erection at her opening. She arched her trembling body to press her chest more tightly against his as he nibbled his way up her neck, freezing with his open mouth at her ear as he exhaled hotly against her skin, pushing into her.
Her hand wrapped possessively around the back of his neck as she cried out, clenching her eyes shut from the sudden jolt of pleasure shooting through her whole body.
"Fucking hell," he muttered against her ear, lips and tongue retreating along her jaw until he found her mouth with his.
She shifted underneath him, meeting his motions, pushing him deeper inside her. She reached between their bodies as he pulled his lips away to breathe, skimming her hand down his chest, back up again... fingernails raking over his nipples.
He shuddered and met her eyes with his heavy-lidded ones, clutching her thigh again-
-as they were suddenly transported onto a deserted Quidditch pitch, dead centre.
Ron blinked around at the dark stands, jaw dropping.
"Oh, Jesus," he breathed. "Never knew this was a fantasy of mine til now."
"Flip us over," Hermione instructed, grinning up at his elation.
He did as instructed, and she pressed her weight fully down on top of him, knees digging into the grassy ground on either side of him. They moaned simultaneously, and she bunched the front of his shirt in her fists. He clutched her waist and met her motions with quick thrusts, air escaping her lungs in panting gasps.
"Love... you..." he sighed out, a bit strangled. Her eyes softened as his hands slid up the front of her shirt, covering her breasts with the warmth of his palms. She slid her own hands inside his shirt, copying him. "Bloody hell."
He suddenly dropped his hands from her chest and wrapped an arm around her lower back as he pulled himself up to sit, holding her in his lap. She wasted no time, clutching his face in both hands and snogging him, tongues meeting, teeth gently clashing...
...as oxygen was ripped from them by another apparition.
Ron's grunt of surprise pulled his lips away from hers, and they opened their eyes as his back hit a bookshelf.
A shocked gasp drew their attention immediately to a bewildered woman, staring down at them from a few metres away.
They were in the middle of a public library, halfway down a row of tall shelves. Hermione felt her heart rate double and frantically tried to think of an excuse-
"She fell!" Ron said quickly, skin positively burning from cheeks to neck. "I caught her!"
The woman blinked at them before clucking her tongue in scandalised disapproval and darting away.
"Oh my god, you are the worst liar."
"Shit." His wide eyes darted as he found her gaze. "Bet she's gone to tell somebody."
He moved underneath her, unintentionally, but the motion hit a sensitive spot, deep inside her, and she clenched her eyes shut as he groaned.
"Should you, uh, get off me?" he asked, lips twitching.
A nervous laugh escaped her.
"At least we're hiding what's actually happening, with me on top of you..."
"It's totally not suspicious you sitting on my lap for an extended period of time after... falling."
"Ohh," Hermione whimpered, "when we find George, I'll-"
But her lungs deflated as they were suddenly transported... to George's kitchen. Landing on the floor, her body pressed even further down on top of Ron as he gasped.
Echoing silence rang around them.
"Get up," Ron instructed, and Hermione followed his advice without question. "Let's fuck on his counters. Part one of payback."
She laughed at his devious expression, and they clambered to their feet. He grabbed her waist and quickly lifted her, placing her on top of the nearest counter and leaning into her, gathering her with his arms around her arched back as he slid inside her again.
"Hold me," she panted, as he increased his pace, "so I won't fall when we-"
He had just enough time to reach down and cup her arse in both hands before they were whisked away...
...into a moving, thankfully empty lift. He was suddenly holding her full weight, and he backed her to the wall, slamming into her.
"Ron!" she cried out, clutching his shoulders as he kissed her.
A familiar ding rang in her ears. The lift had stopped. Ron tore his lips away from hers.
"Oh, shit..."
Horrified, she clamped her eyes shut as the lift doors opened. Ron ducked his head to rest atop her shoulder, clearly trying to will himself invisible. Startled voices blurred together behind him...
...and then they were apparating into a silent office, nearly falling over as Ron supported himself with one palm pressing down on top of the desk directly behind Hermione. He lowered her to the desktop and shuddered.
"Almost," she gasped, as he slid out and back into her. "Use your hand."
He nodded, reaching between them to move his fingers over her, just above where they were joined. Pressing her heel into his arse, she drove him deep inside her again and felt a blinding sensation build between her legs.
"Ermynee," he slurred, tightening his grip on her arse as they were whisked away once more, overbalancing as they apparated directly at the foot of Hermione's bed, at her parents' house.
"Ohh," she moaned, and he toppled them over, her back hitting the soft mattress as he came inside her.
She twitched with aftershocks, and he buried his face against the side of her neck, catching his breath.
"Bloody lucky your parents aren't home," he muttered, and she could feel his grin against her sweaty skin.
"Never, ever, have tea with your brother again, you hear me?" she demanded, body going slack. "He's ruined library fantasies forever..."