A/N: Eien, Dragon. This story's existence is ENTIRELY on the two of you. Y'all need to stop giving me crack pairings. STAHP. And a dorky Mard Geer was too funny for me to resist.

Pairing: Mard Geer/Lucy

Prompt: It's snowing where I live, which is the only reason I'm writing this story.

Silver was leaning against the wall, snickering and watching the normally unflappable Underworld King proceed to lose his everloving mind. There was only one reason Mard Geer would have a 'freak out', as his son called it.

That reason was none other than Fairy Tail's Celestial spirit Mage and Mard's girlfriend, Lucy Heartfilia.

Mard had found out that Lucy had fallen ill from a particularly nasty cold, due to not having warm winter clothes and taking a dunking in the freezing water of the canal. Silver had managed to talk him down from bolting out and murdering Lucy's partner, since, as boneheaded as the Fire Dragon was, he was still Lucy's best friend. She wouldn't take too kindly to his 'accidental' death. Even though it was Natsu's fault Lucy managed to fall into said canal.

Now Mard was pacing and fuming. Wendy refused to let anyone near Lucy, in case her cold turned into something worse. It was times like these that reminded Mard the difference between demons and humans. He would not get sick, but his sweetheart could and did on a regular basis. Lamy had told him rather haughtily that 'people do not die of little trifling colds' and that he should calm down and leave her alone.

It didn't help.

Now the King was pacing, wracking his brain to think of a way to cheer Lucy up and help her feel better at the same time. On his thirty-eighth revolution around the throne room, he came to an abrupt halt. His black eyes focused on Silver, a familiar gleam in his eye. Silver sighed. The last time Mard had looked like that, he had managed to convince Jackal that it was a good idea to switch chemicals around in Lamy's lab, simply to see the chaos it caused.

The blonde bomber had barely escaped with his life.

"Silver," Mard said slowly, rubbing his hands together. "What did your son say his girlfriend's name was?"

Mard held out the small package to a bemused Lucy. The girl was bundled up in bed, blankets covering almost every inch of her body. Three weeks later, she was finally getting over her cold that had turned into a nasty lung infection. Wendy had lifted the quarantine and begrudgingly allowed Mard to see her. In regards to her patients, Wendy was growing more and more like the Dragon Granny everyday.

Lucy took the proffered gift, looked at the plain brown wrapping, and raised an eyebrow. "This isn't going to blow up in my face, is it?" A valid point, after a birthday present from Jackal had turned out to be a glitter bomb. She had sparkled for weeks afterword.

Mard scowled. He too remembered Jackal's gift. "I wrapped it myself. Jackal wasn't allowed anywhere near it. Now would you please open it?"

Hiding a smile, the Celestial Mage obliged and opened the gift from her slightly fidgeting boyfriend. Mard was funny about things like gifts. He hadn't understood the whole meaning behind giving gifts, like for birthdays, Christmas, or just for no reason. She had explained that presents were a way of showing affection and that you knew your significant other well enough to know what they liked. Mard had mused on the subject.

And when he mused, plans usually emerged.

Thankfully, he was over the whole 'let's destroy human civilization and the rest of the world because it looks like fun' stage. Over the next three months, random gifts would appear in her apartment; a pair of star shaped earrings, an incredibly rare book on celestial spirits, and Lucy's personal favorite, a framed image of the two of them drawn by Reedus. The Underworld King had a rare, genuine smile on his face as he watched his laughing blonde sweetheart. Now, there was no telling what he was giving her. But whatever it was, it no doubt would be personal and sweet.

Who would have guessed the fearsome Mard Geer would ever be called 'sweet'?

A smile spread over her face as she looked down at the muted pink hat, cowl, and fingerless gloves nestled in the paper. "Oh Mard, they're lovely! Thank you so much!" Lucy picked up the cowl and rubbed it against her cheek. "Ooo, so soft!" Mard lifted one of her hands and pressed a soft kiss to the palm.

"I'm glad you approve, my dear. I managed to fight and defeat the lesser demon that your friend Juvia called a 'crochet hook'. Her patience is truly astounding as is her determination to win the war against the foul creatures. She also mentioned that this shade of pink would suit you well."

Lucy's eyebrows had been sneaking up her forehead as she listened incredulously to Mard. She looked back at the soft, pink wooly item she held. Now that she looked closely, she could tell it was handmade. The fabric wasn't quite even, there were bits that were much wider, and there was a stain that looked suspiciously like blood. "Mard, did you crochet this for me?"

The King's eyes widened. "Do you not like it?" He asked slowly, the slightest hint of apprehension in his voice. Lucy smiled and brushed a hand against his cheek. "I love it," she said firmly. "The color is beautiful and it will keep me warm for the rest of the winter. And you made it for me, instead of buying them, so it makes it even more special."

Mard huffed, looking a little more like his smug self. "I'm glad you approve, my dear. Your friend said that you had been planning on making yourself a set similar in style so I thought you would appreciate a gift like this." He frowned, rubbing one of his hands absently. "However, I do not believe I will continue with that crafting endeavor. Those lesser demons were quite vicious and did not wish to obey my commands. Perhaps I should leave the wielding of such deadly objects to you and your friend." Lucy giggled, still petting her cowl with a soft smile. "So long as you aren't planning on declaring war on all crochet hooks, knitting needles, and wool, I think not continuing is just fine."

Mard flicked his eyes to the side, a look of guilt spreading across his face. Lucy frowned, crossing her arms over her chest. "Mard..."

"Fine, fine!" The King threw up his hands, admitting defeat before the blonde. "I'll tell Silver to call off the attack plan," he grumbled.

Lucy groaned, before giggling. "You're hopeless," she said and tugged her sweetheart down for a kiss. "And thank you for the gift."

A/N: I managed to sneak in a Pride and Prejudice quote. I'm so proud of myself. And knitting and crochet. With all the fiber arts I've been doing the past few days, how could I not include them?! And Mard is such a dork.