Disclaimer: Everything belongs to their respectful owners.

A/N: Let me roll on my bed and think of angsty adrienette

Also, first fic for 2016 ayyyy and to which I'm still getting used to this '6' instead of the '5'.

CHAT FINALLY CALLED LADYBUG 'MY LADY' IN THE ENGLISH DUB I CAN REST IN PIECES

Sometimes, more often than not, there was something comfortable about sitting at an empty bar in the middle of the night.

Sure, she wasn't entirely alone per say, there were a couple of people sitting at a booth, talking quietly despite the numerous shot glass between them. But it was surprising to find the bar almost empty at this time of the day, where usually at two o'clock in the morning there would be at least ten people or so on the month of Halloween. Today was an exception apparently.

Sighing, Marinette checked her watch, before making a sound akin to a groan when she saw the time, and instead of going back to her squeaky floored flat room to brace herself for the next morning, she continued on cradling the beer in her hand, where it was still half full after her half attempt at drinking it.

She was tired, but she didn't want to sleep, and she had that assignment she had to finish another three days, and she hadn't started anything yet.

The nightmares, they kept popping up like a Jack in a box. She thought that once everything was over, after they defeated Hawkmoth and went for their separate ways, that she wouldn't have anything to do with her life as a heroine anymore, since after a traumatic event where she was forced to face with her insecurities and the possibilities that she could have done by only a flash of purple light.

It nagged in her head to this day.

She busied herself with school, where she went into one of the most famous schools any inspired designer would want to go in. Assignments and projects would be the wall for her past, where she would rather work herself out until she was dry and not face that horrific memory again.

It worked of course.

At least, most of the time.

Adrien Agreste brought up some of the nightmares back.

After they defeated Hawkmoth, they decided to reveal themselves to each other, since it was the only possible thing to do after taking down the city's terrorist together after five years of being partners, where they waited for this moment to come as they finally got to know who was really under that mask.

Imagine her surprise when she saw that her long time crush and classmate was also her partner.

He made an appearance when she was tortured mentally with those images, where he was one of the people she loved and adored to scorn her for life, where he was one of them to make her scream and cry as all of them left her behind, where they hate her for who she was and they would rather die than to see her face ever again.

What happened in that nightmare next was that they did die in the end, bodies scattered all over the clearing as eyes stared emptily into the bright sky, where she was kneeling in their blood as she saw every single detail on them that make her sick to the stomach, where she begged for them to come back.

They didn't see each other again after she made a hasty retreat after that day, her heart pounding as blood rushed in her ears when hateful and bloodied faces kept flashing in her minds eye, where it was so easy to avoid him because ever since high school ended, they were occupied with their own lives.

She begged Tikki to erase all of that had happened, pleaded for her to make her mind at peace because she couldn't take it anymore, the nightmare was getting worse by the month.

But Tikki can do as much, and only shook her head sadly.

As if her thoughts had reached her own mind, the kwami poked her head from the inner pocket of her coat, staring at her worriedly.

Marinette gave a smile, before she rested her forehead to feign resting as she talked to Tikki.

"Are you okay?" Tikki asked quietly, her large blue eyes darting all over her wielder's face. "I could feel you fidgeting."

"I'm fine, Tikki," Marinette murmured back. "Just, you know," She gave a tiny shrug. "Thinking."

There was a small sigh, already seeing past her white lie. "I'm sorry I couldn't do anything about it, Marinette."

"You're here with me," Marinette pointed out. "Giving me support and making sure I don't rot in my room for the past few years, I think you've done more than enough."

"But-"

"No buts, I'm just glad you're here with me when I go through all of this." She paused, giving Tikki a soft smile. "I really am, Tikki. Don't worry about it."

Faintly, there was a tinkle of a bell that indicated that someone entered the shop, and Marinette noticed the way Tikki's eyes widen slightly before she burrowed herself deeper into the pocket, hiding herself out of plain sight.

Marinette frowned. "Tikki-?"

"One glass of wine, please."

Her breath hitched, knowing that voice anywhere.

She didn't know why he was here, when she deliberately chose this time of the night to stay up late so that she didn't have to bumped into anyone she knew.

And she was so careful.

There was silence as she heard him took his place beside her damn him. Gritting her teeth, she didn't say anything as the glass clicked when the barista got his drink ready, particularly feeling his body heat that made her skin tingled despite the thick coat she wore for that cold autumn day.

There was a faint thud of glass being set on the counter, before she could hear the barista walking away, leaving the both of them together as she still refused to look at him.

"You can't hide forever, you know."

She tensed. "No harm in trying, can I?"

"I'll always find you in the end, Mari."

Stupid cat.

She lifted her head, her lips thinned into a straight line as she finally faced him, where he was staring at her with his glass in hand.

She remembered how he was, even if it's been four years since she left him alone on the roof of the Louvre when she sprinted away, where he was gaping after her back then.

"By what? Stalking?" She propped her elbow on the surface, giving him a bemused look. "Because stealth wasn't exactly your thing."

He gave a quirk of a smile. "I beg to differ."

She narrowed her eyes. "Try me."

She knew that she was being harsh, she knew that she shouldn't address him as bitingly as she was at the moment when she was the one who abandoned him on that day, where she still remembered vividly how orange the skies were as the wind blew gently onto their skin.

But she couldn't help but let her defensive wall build up the moment she faced him.

When he didn't say anything, just looking at her with this look on his face she couldn't exactly decipher that she was tempted to shift in her seat. She straightened up her back, avoiding his eyes.

"Why are you here, Adrien?" She finally asked quietly, eyes darting to the door where the barista had gone to the back. "It can't be pure coincidence for you to come in a desolate bar in the middle of the night with me in it."

He swirled the contents of his glass. "It could be."

"But it's not."

"How would you know?"

"Because I know you enough," She almost snapped, almost, because the dreams were flashing in her head again, where she felt her chest being pressed steadily as if a boulder decided to rest there. "We were partners. I could almost know what you were thinking before you acted on it."

And apparently, he knew her enough too. "Mari," He began softly, his green eyes filled with concern that she had to look away. "Let me help."

Lie. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"I think you do," He murmured, setting his glass on the counter as he faced her fully. "He still gives you nightmares, doesn't he? And there's something about it had to do with me that you can't bear to look at me in the eye anymore. That's why you ran away, or still running in fact, from me."

There was something in her snapped.

No.

She couldn't do this.

Despite it being years, despite her conscious telling her to leave it all behind when it's been too long for her to carry the weight of it on her shoulders, she still wasn't ready for the words to be finally said, as if she was physically struck with the realisation that she still couldn't do this at the moment, she still couldn't have that conversation about him when he was the one who was laying on the ground at her feet, where over the years, her mind decided to twist her memory of that damned nightmare where instead there were two pairs of empty green eyes stared at her in utter betrayal, at how she couldn't save them all.

She stood up abruptly, causing him to widen his eyes in surprise. "I have to go."

"Marinette-"

She stormed away, thankful that she payed her bill earlier as she pushed the door open, wrapping her arms around herself as she made her way to her flat, ignoring the calls from behind her when the overwhelmed feeling spread around her torso, where it was pushing itself against her sternum that she was afraid she would have another anxiety attack coming up soon.

She tried breathing properly, letting the cold air bite her nose and cheeks, where she couldn't give a second thought to her freezing ears as she hunched up her shoulders, until she felt a hand on her arm.

Whirling around, she saw him standing there, immediately withdrawing his hand when he saw the panicked look on her face, guilt etching on his own features. "I know this is hard for you," He murmured. "But I can't keep doing this if you keep running away from me."

"That's just the thing," She cursed silently when her voiced quivered. "When I see you, I see that thing that's been going on in my head and I hate it, I hate when I can't help but be like this when you're here and I'm sorry for that. I'm sorry that I had to be snappish with you because I just can't bare to be near you without seeing you die right in front of me."

She stared at her shoes, until he spoke quietly that she had to strain herself to listen to him.

"Let me help," He began softly, his hand rising to push back the strand of hair behind her ear but decided against it in the end. He took a deep breath, dropping his hand to his side limply. "I promise to back off if you couldn't handle it, I'll leave you alone as you want it to be but please, I need to know what really happened so that I can understand, so that I know I don't need to feel so hurt the next time you want to cut yourself off from me."

She met his eyes, where desperation started to seep in the longer she stayed quiet, until she slowly nodded her head as she looked down again, her response coming out into nothing but a whisper.

"Okay."

They didn't waste any time when she ushered him inside her flat, where he followed her into her kitchenette as she switched on the pot to boil water.

Tikki got out of her coat and gave her an encouraging smile, before she gave Adrien a pat on the cheek before pulling Plagg out of the room, giving them the privacy they needed.

She was thankful he stayed quiet as she leaned against the counter, where she clutched onto the edge from where she leaned forward as he stood at the other end of the small space, pursing her lips when the sound of the water bubbling filled in the silence for them.

The walk home had calmed her nerves, where she didn't feel like she was going to run anytime soon to get rid of all the negativity that was coursing through her at the moment, and she relished on the moment where the only noises she had to hear was the rhythmic sound of their shoes scruffing against the pavement.

Now, in her small space of a home, she could feel his eyes, expectant and yet patient, familiar on her side and she was brought back to the days when they were only fifteen, where she would look over the city as he would stare at her in curiosity, as if she was this puzzle he needed to solve.

She took a deep breath.

"I'm sorry."

There was a moment of silence.

"There's nothing to forgive."

She let out an empty chuckle, giving him a glance to where he was leaning back on the counter. "You're too modest for your own good, you know that? I left you there on the roof alone after we revealed our identities, making myself scarce for the past few years, and now you're telling me to not ask forgiveness from you?"

He gave a quirk of a smile. "Basically."

She analysed him, letting her eyes roam around his face. "Bullshit."

He let out a bark of laughter. "Come on, Mari, you said you know me enough, look me in the eye and tell me that I resent you for everything you did."

She mimicked his position, crossing her arms across her chest. "But you're hurt."

He smiled. "Yeah I was hurt, but I don't, hate you for that. God Mari," He let out a chuckle, where there was weariness instead of the bitterness she expected. "What do you take me for?"

"I don't know, kitty," She deadpanned, unnerved by his amusement. "What do I take you for?"

He raised an eyebrow. "Why don't you tell me?"

She clamped her mouth shut, looking away. "Because I can't."

"Well, I can tell you what I think of you," He told her lightly, taking a step forward. "You're strong, you're kind, you're amazing," He paused, where she had looked away with her bottom lip being gnawed at. "And I couldn't be more happy to be your partner."

She sighed. "I'm not as spectacular as you made me sound, Adrien. I'm not- I couldn't even protect you when you were beaten up by that akuma, where I was too hopeless to do anything because I was stuck in that stupid nightmare and I have never felt so helpless in my life when you were in pain and bloody-"

"Hey," He whispered, already right in front of her that she didn't noticed when she was busy raving about everything that was crowding her mind for what almost felt like forever. "You took that hit for me," He tentively brushed the back of his fingers on her cheek, and she shut her eyes, willing herself to not let the heat at the back of her eyes spread. "And I will always be grateful for that."

Taking a staggering breath, she clutched onto his jacket as she looked at him again, where he had yet to take it off after they came in. "But you were hurt."

"So were you," He said quietly, resting his forehead onto hers. "And I never did forgive myself when I saw you there screaming, as if you were being teared apart physically from the inside," He exhaled softly, and the small gust of wind tickled her face. "I never forgave myself for what you had to go through."

Wrapping her arms around his waist, she buried her face into his chest as he immediately brought her close. "I'm sorry," She choked out, and he held her tighter. "I'm so sorry."

"And I'm sorry that you had to go through this," He pressed his lips against her hair. "I'm sorry I wasn't there for you."

They stayed like that for a while, where their quiet breathing filled in the silence for them. She closed her eyes again, where she could assure herself that he was here, that she could still feel him alive under her fingers, his own heart beating against her that she took solace on the fact that he was breathing.

"You know," Came a drawl that she snapped her eyes open, feeling the beginnings of a dread starting to sink it. "I'm glad that you're looking out furme."

She groaned, knowing how the moment was ruined but feeling the weight that lifted off her chest. "I thought you'd gotten past that."

She could feel the way his chest rumbled with low laughter as he ducked his head to the side of her head. "I'm sorry, what was that?" Her breath hitched slightly when his breath tickled her ear. "You want mraw?"

She leaned back, shooting him a playful scowl. "No."

He seemed to be surprised at the close approximation, where her nose brush slightly against her as he blinked at her. She realised their situation and stiffen, a streak of pink appearing across her face.

"Marinette," He breathed, his eyes darted to her lips was not unnoticed by her, causing her to blush harder. "You don't suppose that you could at least promise me to not run away from me again?"

She inhaled shakingly. "Maybe," She was glad that she didn't stutter. "Why?"

"Well," He gingerly grazed his lips against the corner of hers that she gulped.

"You wouldn't feel the tail of my love then."

The indignant splutter that threatened to spill was stopped when he pressed their lips together softly, and she deflated completely against him that her eyes immediately closed.

Their kiss was sweet, slow, in content as they lazily tasted each others lips, where her hands had withdrew from his waist and had instead rested them between their bodies, where she held onto the edge of his coat, unbuttoned as he left it the way it was.

He cupped her cheek, the hint of coldness still visible in his bare hands as he brushed a thumb against the swell of her cheek, where she shuddered slightly when he tugged onto her lower lip between his teeth, pressing a brief kiss to her mouth before he trailed them to her the line of her jaw, where he paused at the spot below her ear.

She licked her lips. "Y-You know, that pun was totally unnecessary."

He let out a breath of laughter against her skin that she gripped his front sweater he wore under his coat. "I think it was purrfection."

"Honestly, kitty."

"You have no idea," He whispered suddenly as he then run down his hands down her back, where he rested them on the slope of her body as he brought her closer to him, kissing his way up to her forehead. "No idea at all, at how I was hopping to see you again. And now that I have," He pressed a kiss between her brows that she fluttered her eyes closed. "I just couldn't believe it."

It was her turn to chuckle, feeling the way he nudged his nose with hers. "I missed you."

He planted another kiss on her lips.

"I missed you too."