"Aaaaand…done! Bum-dum-dum-da!"

Steven stood on his knees and held the album proudly in his hands. Front to cover, each plastic page was filled with all 375 of his Guy Trading Cards. He had them listed alphabetically, from Acrobat Guy to Zookeeper Guy. Three years of online shopping, grocery store visits, and collector training had finally paid off in the end.

"Done already?"

Steven turned to Sadie, who was arranging some powder-pink donuts in the display case. Sadie Miller was one of the two teenage employees at Beach City's The Big Donut and was no stranger to Steven's visits to the shop. Steven had come in only a half-hour before with a new album, a roll of stickers, and a black marker to spend time until the Crystal Gems returned home to the Temple.

Steven nodded vigorously and lowered his voice dramatically. "Introducing…STEVEN'S GREAT N' GARGANTUAN GUIDE TO THE GUYS!"

He held the album up like a trophy. The red cloth cover had been scribbled on with marker and decorated with glittering star stickers. The fat black letters spelled out the name, although "TO THE GUYS" had all been messily crammed into the same line so it pretty much read as "TOTHEGUYS".

Sadie nodded and smiled, fluffy blonde hair bouncing as she did so. "Sweet."

Lars, the other employee at The Big Donut, came in from the back then. He scoffed at the album and droned, "Fascinating. A book filled with cards of the dumbest toys ev—ow! What?"

Lars rubbed his sore arm as Sadie shook her head at him. Putting her smile back on, she turned back to Steven. "What IS the deal with Guys, anyway?"

Steven gasped dramatically, as if that were the most absurd thing he'd ever heard. "They're only the coolest toys in the WORLD! There are rare Guys, platinum Guys, limited edition Guys, even Guy food products, like Guy Juice and Guy Candies!"

"Guy Juice?"

"Yeah, it tastes terrible, but it exists!" Steven ran through the pages of the album with stars in his yes. "Every single Guy is my role model."

Lars rolled his eyes. "I thought the Crystal Babes were your role models—Agh! What is your problem?!"

Oblivious to the glare that Sadie was giving Lars, Steven replied, "They are! I have tons of role models. I wish they all had trading cards like these!"

Lars—still holding his arm in pain—sighed and said, "Well, why don't you just make some?"

Steven gasped so loudly that the two teenagers were surprised that he didn't choke. "THAT'S A GREAT IDEA! THANKS, LARS!" He walked to the counter and held up his arms expectantly.

"What are you doing?"

"Waiting for a thank-you hug."

"No."

"I'll get you one day, Lars. Anyway!" Steven scurried back to the table to pick up his stickers and marker. On his way to the door, he called over his shoulder, "See you guys later!" and ran off to the Temple to get the supplies he needed to begin.

Steven and the Crystal Gems lived in an ancient Temple at the very end of the beach. The Temple was gargantuan in size, carved into the side of the cliff, and depicted a magnificent woman with four pairs of arms. The woman had two faces—one staring glaringly over the ocean, and the other smiling serenely down at the ground—and two of her eight hands clutched Steven's 'Room.' Technically, it was more like a house, with a bedroom, kitchen, bathroom, and whatnot, but the Crystal Gems referred to it as a 'room.'

Steven dashed up the stairs to the screen door and threw it open absentmindedly. "Are you guys back y—AGH!"

Steven let out a cry and dropped his album when something suddenly pinned him to the floor. Steven did his best to hold it at arm's length, and opened his eyes just enough to see what it was.

It looked like a giant wasp, with a three-part body colored electric blue. Its legs were like metal, yellow and reflective. Iridescent wings buzzed on its back, and two metallic pincers on its head tried to snap at Steven. Instead of eyes, it had two gaping holes in its head.

Steven had no idea what it was, why it was here, or what he was supposed to do, but he was much more focused on the stinger that was aimed at his belly. Steven thrashed and kicked, but it was no use.

A sudden force knocked the insect off of him, and Steven watched as it flew all the way to the far wall, where it disappeared in a burst of glittering dust on impact.

His savior was small, only a bit taller than him, with bright red skin, downy dark hair with a tie, and a rather stocky build. She was dressed in small boots, long dark pants, and a sleeveless scarlet tank top, not unlike exercise wear. Two gauntlets covered each of her hands.

She turned to Steven just long enough to shout "TAKE COVER!" before running off with a war cry.

Steven just realized that the place was swarming with the things, on every surface, buzzing through the air. He grabbed his album and threw himself under the living room table. He watched from his hiding spot as the small red person smashed and crushed bug after bug, all of them bursting into dust each time.

Watching gave Steven an idea, and he blindly reached to the top of the table, feeling around for paper. He got a sheet, and with his marker, drew a card-size rectangle with another inside for a picture. He spoke to himself as he wrote.

"Ruby. Special Abilities: Strength, Heat, Anger. This Crystal Gem is incredibly strong, but she also gets incredibly angry, so WATCH OUT."

Steven hardly had time to smile at his work when another insect landed right in front of him. He yelped and dove out from the table, but had no idea what to do next. The insect poised as if to leap at him.

"Steven! Get up here!"

Steven wasted no time in frantically dashing up the stairs to his loft. He brushed past a blue blur on the way up, and only looked to see who it was when he was "safe" under the blankets of his bed.

This person was a bit taller, though not by much. Almost everything on her was blue—light blue skin, powder blue hair, baby blue dress. The only exceptions were her black gloves and the black star portrayed on a strip of cloth running down her front. In each hand were knuckledusters, silver clutches with a sharp blue gemstone on each knuckle.

She was incredibly agile, never missing a beat between slashing the creatures with her knuckles. She dodged every strike that came at her as if she knew that it was coming a second prior. One insect dove for her from behind. She didn't spare it a glance a she simply uppercut it.

Steven reached for another piece of paper and his marker.

"Sapphire. Special Abilities: Speed, Concentration, Future Vision. Sapphire doesn't talk much, but she's got a big heart."

Steven was too distracted to notice the group of insects buzzing around him, stingers poised to strike. He did, however, notice when something wrapped around him and pulled him off the bed. He felt his stomach flip-flop as whatever was holding him practically flew through the air and landed with a heavy thump. A moment later, the blankets cocooned around him fell away from his eyes.

Unlike the others, this person was easily ten feet tall at least, and was dressed in a long tunic and leggings. She had light lilac skin and a mane of wild white hair tied back from her face. But those were hardly her most defining features. Other than her towering height, she also had four arms, two of which were holding Steven a few feet off the ground, and the other two holding a great longbow.

Although her hair was frazzled and her eyes were wide, her full lips smiled at Steven as she said, "Maybe you should just stay here for a bit, okay?"

That's all she said before all but stuffing him into a kitchen cupboard. Steven heard her footsteps running away, and had his paper and marker ready as he opened the door just enough to see her in the crack. She moved as gracefully as a dancer, practically swaying to dodge the insects, pulling the string of her bow back to hit her targets precisely.

"Opal. Special Abilities: Agility, Strength, Speed. Opal is the strongest of the Crystal Gems, and is impossible to hit in battle."

"Steven!" Ruby's high-pitched, slightly scratchy voiced called out. "Where are you?!"

"In here!"

"You can come out now!"

Steven threw the door open and carefully climbed onto the counter, then the floor. The insects were gone at last. One by one, the Crystal Gems dismissed the weapons in their hands, disappearing in flashes of light.

"What were those things?" Steven immediately asked.

"Crystal Wasps," was Sapphire's quiet answer. Sapphire hardly ever raised her voice above a monotone, and that, coupled with the bangs that covered half of her face, easily made her the most stoic person that Steven knew. "There must be a nest nearby."

"They didn't leave Gems behind," added Ruby. "So that means there's probably a huge, seriously angry queen nearby. Urgh!" Ruby dug her fingers into her hair with an annoyed groan.

The monsters that the Crystal Gems fought were supposed to leave Gems when they "poof-ed." One of them would encase the Gem in a bubble and send it to the Bubble Room for safekeeping.

"You didn't get stung, did you?" Opal asked worriedly.

"No, I'm fine. But listen!" Steven took out his paper and held it up for them to see. As they leaned forward for a better look, he explained, "I want to make trading cards of you guys!"

Ruby pulled back with an eyebrow raised. "You mean like your Dude toys?"

"Guy toys. And maybe we could do other things, too! Like a Ruby heating pad, or a Sapphire action figure with three whole recorded lines!" He gasped and pressed his hands to his cheeks. "We could even make Opal Juice! It would take like apricots and peaches."

The Crystal Gems glanced at each other—well, Ruby and Sapphire did, since Opal seemed to be contemplating the possibility of Opal Juice—and eventually, Sapphire spoke up, "Steven, we need to look for the nest right now."

"I can help you guys look!"

"No, no, no, no, no." Opal shook her head fervently. "You can't be the one to find a huge nest filled with dozens of Crystal Wasps and their queen."

Steven sighed in disappointed, but raised his paper. Mustering up his infamous puppy dog eyes, he plead, "Can I at least work on the cards of you guys?"

Ruby glared away, as if she just wanted to get to work already, but in truth, was trying to avoid the puppy dog eyes. "Fine. But if we say 'run', you run like crazy."

Steven decided to follow Ruby first, to the storage area underneath the house. He sat on a box underneath the shade of the deck, while Ruby was trying to follow a trail of wing scales from the Crystal Wasps. He had already drawn her picture in, and was now on the backside to write in the Fun Facts.

"What's your favorite food?"

Ruby raised a box over her head with one hand as she replied, "Uh…those sweet potato fries from that boardwalk place aren't bad, I guess."

"What's your favorite past time?"

"Training."

"What's your catchphrase?"

Ruby seemed to not have heard him this time, having been too busy looking for more wing scales. She threw the box back down with a groan. "Ugh!"

"U…G…H…" Steven murmured to himself.

Ruby froze suddenly, inching closer to the wall of dirt and clay beside them. She pressed an ear to it, paused, then turned to Steven with narrowed eyes. "Get ready to run like crazy."

Steven hopped off the box and took a starting position to do just that.

Ruby reared her fist back, her gauntlet appearing on her hand in a pop of red light, and brought it smashing into the wall with a war cry. Dirt and rubble blasted everywhere, and Steven couldn't help but flinch at the pebbles and clods that fell around him.

A moment later, Ruby gave yet another growl of disdain. The sound she'd heard was just the water system moving, and now it was partially exposed.

Steven watched with sudden interest as her gauntlet went bright red all over before disappearing entirely. The scarlet Gem in her hand flickered with light.

"How do you do that?"

Ruby brushed off dust that had landed on her clothes. "Do what?"

"Activate your Weapon."

Ruby paused. The Crystal Gems didn't know for sure, but they had hoped that Steven's Gem—the one in his belly, the one he'd inherited from his mother when she'd given up her physical form for him—would be able to project a Weapon for him. They'd tried asking him to do it, but he just didn't seem aware of what it took yet.

"Well…" Ruby curled her hands into fists as she explained, "First, I pull all my energy together. I build it up inside, direct it into my Gem, and…"

She raised her arms over her head and brought them down in a harsh swing. The gauntlets appeared once again, one on each hand. Ruby crossed her arms over her chest triumphantly. "Like that."

Steven nodded, and when Ruby turned back to keep investigating, he pulled up the hem of his shirt to look at the pink Gem embedded in his belly.

"Hello Steven."

Sapphire hadn't even turned around to look at the boy, though to be fair, did she really need to? She was standing at the shoreline, the salty waves running up to lap at her skirts before receding away. Both of her hands were clasped together at her chest.

"What are you doing?"

"Looking to see where we may be able to find the nest."

"Oh. Uh…can I ask you some questions for the trading cards?"

"Yes, you can."

"What is your favorite food?"

"Gems do not require food to sustain our bodies." She paused. "That being said, I suppose coffee isn't bad."

"Got it. What is your favorite past time?"

"Meditating."

"What would you say is your catchphrase?"

"Hm?"

"Your catchphrase."

Sapphire turned her head to him. "Hm?"

"Something that you say often."

"Hm…"

"Hm?"

"Hm?"

"'Hm'?"

"Oh." She nodded and turned back to the ocean. "Hm."

Steven wrote it down. "H…M…Alright." He tucked the paper underneath his arm, but stayed where he was. "Um…"

"Is there something else you need?"

"I was wondering…How do you summon your Weapon?"

Sapphire finally turned away from the ocean completely and raised her hands to him. The cobalt Gem in her palm glinted in the evening sun. "Summoning your Weapon is like taking a piece of yourself and removing it without actually breaking the connection. You reach into yourself, take that piece, and brandish it."

Her arms went from parallel to crossing, and her knuckledusters appeared in each hand. "Do you understand?"

"Um…yeah."

"…I don't think you do."

"I do!"

"…Hm." She dismissed the knuckledusters back into her Gem, and clasped her hands back together before turning to the ocean again. "If that's all you need, I need to return to processing the future."

"Okay. Um, do you—?"

"She's on top of the cliff."

"Wow."

"Yes. Wow."

"What is your favorite food?"

Opal hummed and put a finger to her chin. On top of the cliff, above the Temple, the high breeze rustled her hair around her. Steven was perched on a rock, ready to document her answer.

"I don't eat often, but I guess cinnamon pizza is pretty good."

"What is your favorite pastime?"

"Dancing. No, walking. No, singing. Wait—"

"I'll just put all three. What is your catchphrase?"

"'You win some, you lose some', I guess. I don't say that often, do I? I wonder where I heard that from. Was it Greg…?" Opal blinked at him slowly. "What were we talking about?"

"Yeah, that one will work." Steven quickly scribbled down What were we talking about? He put the paper away and turned back to Opal. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"How do you summon your Weapon?"

"Well," said Opal. "I have to concentrate, but not completely lose attention to my surroundings, either." One pair of hands rose to cup the solid white Gem in her forehead, the other pair cupping the multicolored Gem in her chest. "I have to move quickly, so I throw all of my concentration into just one second of power and…!"

In a flash of light, her longbow appeared in her hands. It was probably three times Steven's height, maybe two.

"That's how I do it."

Steven glanced down at his Gem. "Oh…Okay." He hopped off his rock. "I guess that's it, then. I'll let you get back to searching."

"Searching for what?"

"The Crystal Wasp nest."

"Oh. Right."

Steven had left the paper and marker on his bed while he stood at the foot of it. He was determined to summon his Weapon like the others. They could do it so easily, so why couldn't he?

He threw his fists down in a burst of energy, but his Gem didn't even flicker. Channeling his energy wouldn't work, apparently.

He crossed his arms over his chest, trying to empty his mind and connect himself with his Gem…or something like that. That didn't work, either.

He tried doing it quickly, going still then suddenly letting out a "HAH!" as he flexed his muscles together. No results for that one, either.

He sighed in defeat and reached for the paper. The three cards for the Crystal Gems were colored and ready to be cut out. Ruby's was red, Sapphire's was blue, and Opal's was light purple. But there was a fourth pink card underneath them, the picture box empty. Steven picked up the paper to read it.

STEVEN – SPECIAL ABILITIES: ?—This Crystal Gem is ?

He looked at the empty card and then down at his Gem. He covered it with his shirt. How could he be like his role models when he couldn't do the easiest trick in the book?

He'd been so busy reading that he hadn't heard the distant buzzing. At first he assumed it was a passing helicopter, but then he realized it was coming closer and closer. He heard distant shouts, and sat up on his bed worriedly.

The front door flew open and hit the wall with a sudden slam. Ruby frantically looked around until she found him on the bed. "STEVEN! STAY IN HERE!" That was all she said before she slammed the door shut.

That command had never compelled Steven before, and it wasn't going to now. He ran down the stairs and stuffed the paper of cards and his marker into his pocket.

On the way down, he heard something thud against the floor. Steven looked behind him, seeing a book from his shelf had toppled over. He figured he must have hit hit in his haste.

Steven ran to and opened the door and all but threw himself against the railing to see what was going on.

The Queen Wasp had finally arrived. She looked similar to the others, electric blue and metallic yellow, but she was easily ten times larger, her pincers and stinger ten times sharper. A white Gem glittered between her two gaping eyes. She buzzed above the Crystal Gems, her huge wings sending gusts of wind down on them.

As Steven watched, the Queen reared her stinger back. The sharp end of it shot out from her, straight for the Gems. They managed to dodge, thankfully, but another stinger appeared in its place and fired again. One after another, in quick succession, until she it was a hailstorm of them. Whenever a Crystal Gem tried to jump up and strike her, she would fly out of their reach. Their only hope was Opal's bow, but she was having a hard time aiming and dodging at the same time.

When Opal tried to turn around the Queen, the barrage of stingers followed her. A line of then went up the ground all the way to the deck of Steven's room. One struck a support beam, shattering it, and Steven yelped in surprise when he felt it give way beneath him. Luckily, he was caught by Opal, who wasted no time in carrying him in her arms.

Ruby ran past them, yelling, "I SAID STAY IN THE HOUSE!"

Although her voice was still monotone, somewhere Sapphire cried, "We can't get near her!"

"WE HAVE TO DISTRACT HER SOMEHOW!" called Opal. "BUT NOW SHE'S SEEN STEVEN, AND SHE WON'T LEAVE HIM ALONE!"

It was a moment before Ruby called back, "SAPPHIRE AND I CAN GROUP TOGETHER SO IT'LL TARGET US. WATCH OVER STEVEN!"

Steven watched the blurry silhouettes of Ruby and Sapphire join together. It seemed to work, as the Queen turned on them. Emphasis on "seem", however. Opal put Steven down and drew back her bowstring at the same time that the Queen suddenly dived for Ruby and Sapphire.

The two managed to dodge, Sapphire on her feet, Ruby skidding on one knee. The Queen brought herself upright and turned to them. Ruby and Sapphire ran towards Opal and Steven as Opal finally fired a bright blue arrow at the Queen.

It would have been a perfect hit, if the seemingly soft blue parts of the Queen's body weren't as armored as the metallic yellow parts. The arrow had no effect other than making her even angrier than before.

"I have to hit her in the face," Opal hissed. She drew her bowstring back again. "You guys make a run for it when I tell you to."

The Queen dove for them, and Steven's mind started racing. What if Opal misfired and the Queen ended up coming for her, anyway? Opal would be defenseless, and when the Queen was done with her, she'd come for Ruby and Sapphire, and then him, and that would be it!

The Queen drew nearer, and Steven's belly suddenly grew warm, and Opal cried "RUN!" and—

BOOM!

Steven opened his eyes, unaware that he had closed them.

Before him, emitting from his Gem like a film projector, a round pink shield stood between the Queen and the Gems. The Queen was shaking, having disoriented herself when he head came crashing straight into it. Behind him, he heard one of the Crystal Gems gasp.

A shield! His Weapon was a shield!

His victory was short-lived when Opal took advantage of the Queen's state and fired an arrow into her head. In a burst of blue and yellow smoke, the Queen disappeared. Steven jumped when it happened, and when he opened his eyes again, the shield was gone.

Sapphire ran over to hold the Gem in a bright blue Bubble. She pressed on it like a button, and it disappeared to the Bubble Room.

Steven tried to summon his Weapon again, hoping to do the same he had done before. Unfortunately, it was useless—his Gem had gone back to being lifeless.

"I'm never going to figure this out."

Opal knelt down to come a little closer to the boy (albeit she still towered over him considerably.) "That was your first time. It takes some getting used to."

"But I'm supposed to be a Crystal Gem! It should be easy for me!"

The Crystal Gems looked at one another for a moment before turning back to him, all smiling. Opal reached out and took the paper and the marker from his pocket. She scribbled something down on it, then passed it to Ruby, who did the same. Sapphire was the last one to write something down before handing it back to Steven.

Steven's card had been filled in. A picture of Steven smiling and surrounded by stars was in the box, and below that, Steven read:

STEVEN – SPECIAL ABILITIES: Fun, Understanding, Determination – This Crystal Gem is the best of them all!

"You are a Crystal Gem, Steven," said Sapphire. She stepped forward and put her gloved hands on his shoulders comfortingly. "You'll figure it out, and we're going to help you."

Ruby nodded fervently, and Opal raised one of her four hands to rustle Steven's curly hair. Steven smiled at them, his eyes lighting up.

Ruby raised her arms to stretch them and started walking back to the stairs leading to Steven's Room. "Now I'm bored. What are we going to do?"

"I know!" Opal bent down to lift Steven into her arms as he excitedly shouted, "Let's make Opal Juice!"

"Do I get to pound the fruit?" Ruby called from inside.

"Sure!"

"I'm in."

"It's going to taste weird," Sapphire said as she quickly flitted up the stairs after Ruby.

"I know," replied Steven, and Opal chuckled as she pulled him closer.