Chapter Seven

"Stay"

The next few days passed in a confused blur of familiar faces and bandage changes. Doc continued to dose 10K with morphine, until the afternoon came when he told them all he had run out. 10K didn't mind too much about that at first... the pain wasn't so bad, anyway. It wasn't until later that evening that the reason for his lack of feeling was made painfully clear, and at that point, he would've given an arm and a leg for another dose of the medication.

By moon rise on the third night, every small bump in the road was sending sharp, hot pains through his chest and down his arms, making it almost impossible for him to move. He hid it well, grinding his teeth together every time it became too much, and shutting his eyes, pretending to be asleep so no one would notice or try to speak to him. But every time they heard his breathing hitch, the others stopped what they were doing to look at him, and Warren would ease up a little on the gas pedal.

Addy was usually there in the back with 10K and Murphy, sponging their faces with cool water in an effort to keep their temperatures down, and making sure their bandages were clean. Warren took most of her shifts at the wheel, until she was too tired to see straight, and then Vasquez would take over. Doc was the most helpful, 10K thought. Addy kept any infection away with her nursing, but Doc had a way of lightening the mood in the truck just by his very presence. Whenever 10K was able, Doc would sit beside him, telling funny stories, and making jokes. For 10K's benefit, he would usually pretend not to notice whenever the pain started to overwhelm his young friend - that was what 10K appreciated the most.

Then there were those silent hours, in the middle of the night, when everyone except Warren or Vasquez was sleeping, and Murphy and 10K were alone in the back. Murphy tried to talk to 10K on several of those occasions, but 10K would feign sleep, not wanting to talk, or think, or feel. Guilt had started building up like heavy bricks in his gut every time he did this. Murphy had saved his life, and he had stopped the stranger from doing whatever he had wanted to do. But somehow, 10K found it harder and harder to accept the idea that Murphy had been there at all. Murphy didn't press it, but 10K often felt the man's eyes on him in the darkness, when most everyone else was sleeping.

The fourth morning since the escape dawned gray and foggy, and the group started waking up in the truck one by one. 10K was already awake; it was hard for him to sleep at all in the bumpy truck since the morphine had run out. He craned his neck to see the front seat, and saw Warren yawn widely at the wheel, giving her head a shake to stave off fatigue, before pressing the brakes and pulling the truck off to the side. The vehicle bumped roughly across the shoulder of the road, and 10K winced, quickly laying flat again.

"Alright, kids," said Warren quietly, turning around in her seat once the truck had come to a stop. She peered over the rows where the others had been sleeping and into the back of the truck, giving 10K and Murphy a thorough once-over. Then she turned to the others, who were starting to sit up in their seats. "That's a town up there. We need more bandages, and antibiotics, gas... and I need back up. We can't take the truck... the last thing we need is to draw in the Z's, with Murphy down for the count."

"I'll go," said Addy immediately, stretching her arms and rubbing the sleep out of her eyes. She put her hand down on the spiked weapon she'd laid by her feet. "But aren't you tired, Warren? You've been driving all night."

"What's new?" said Warren dryly, shaking her head. "No, I'm fine. If we get what we need, I can sleep easier, and one of you can take over for the next hundred miles."

"I'll come with you, too," said Vasquez, sitting up and checking his sidearm. "Where are you thinking we'll find this stuff?"

Warren gazed out the window across the flat, dry landscape, where the first few houses could be seen on the outskirts of town. "I'm hoping a pharmacy will have some left over medicine and gauze, but if not, we'll have to check the hospital. Maybe even a veterinary clinic, or something. Vasquez, will you grab the gas cans? Doc - stay with 10K and Murphy?" Warren tilted her head toward the back of the truck.

Doc gave a bleary nod, still shaking off sleep. "Sure thing."

"There's half a roll of bandages left in the kit. Use it for 10K; Murphy's wound is healing pretty clean."

"You got it, sarge. Murphy's wound needs air now, anyway, at least for a couple hours a day."

With a grateful nod, Warren pushed open her door and hopped down to the ground, pulling her handgun out of its holster as a precaution. "Anything happens, you just drive," she ordered Doc. "We still have to get Murphy to California in one piece." She stuck the keys up under the driver's side visor as Addy and Vasquez exited the truck on the other side.

"We won't be long," said Warren over her shoulder to Doc, before leading the others out across the short stretch of desert.

As soon as the muted sound of their footsteps faded into silence, 10K heard Doc turn in his seat to look back at them. The man didn't say anything, probably not wanting to wake either of them up. There was the squeaking sound of fabric on leather as Doc moved his way forward to the front seat, and a second later, the radio turned on. The static buzzing of empty frequencies was interrupted by short clicks as Doc moved through the stations. He went through the dial several times with no results, before finally giving up with a muttered swear.

10K opened his eyes, and looked over at Murphy. Murphy's eyes were open too, and he appeared to be looking out the window, but he turned his head toward 10K when he saw the boy's movement out of the corner of his eye.

10K looked away, inexplicably embarrassed.

"How you feeling, kid?" came Murphy's gruff voice, loud in the early morning stillness.

"Good. I'm good," he answered quickly, without taking his eyes off the ceiling. A stab of pain laced with guilt made its way through his chest.

"Yeah? Well you look half-dead," said Murphy, not trying to be funny. "You need to drink water when they offer it."

"It's fine, I'm not thirsty." But 10K's voice cracked in his parched throat.

As though Doc had been waiting to hear them awaken, he climbed back over the seats, dragging a canvass bag, and knelt down between the two cots, leaning against the back of the last row of seats. "Didn't know you two were awake," he said, opening the bag and giving them a light smile.

Murphy grunted. "We wouldn't be, if you hadn't gone and turned on that damn radio. When are you gonna give up on that 'Citizen Z' guy?"

"He's still out there," said Doc, unperturbed by Murphy's tone. "What d'you think he's up to, up there at the top of the world?"

"Don't care."

Doc shook his head, turning to 10K. "What about you?" He asked. "You doing alright?"

10K nodded. "I'm fine."

"Good. You're definitely breathing better, and you're talking a hell of a lot better."

10K nodded again, wishing he hadn't stopped pretending to be asleep. Lately, he'd been thankful for Doc's uplifting presence, but not right now.. not when only he, Doc and Murphy were in the truck. Silence would have been better. An uncomfortable, unsettled feeling was creeping through him that had nothing to do with the pain in his chest.

"The others have gone into town for supplies, left me in charge of you two," Doc explained, lifting up the canvass bag. "Have some water, here." He dug a water bottle out of the bag, uncapped it, and stuck in a straw, handing it over toward 10K.

10K was about to refuse, but he thought of what Murphy had said, and rather than evoke another conversation about it, he reached out and reluctantly took the bottle. He didn't have to move his head to drink from the straw, and Doc looked pleased when he took a few sips.

"That's better. I was starting to worry about you, not drinking, not eating, not pissing..."

10K swallowed another sip, then handed the bottle back to Doc. "Thanks," he said quietly, reaching up to wipe his mouth.

Doc took the bottle back. "Don't thank me, kid. Just heal yourself up." He stuffed the water back inside the bag, and drew out a small roll of white bandages. "Speaking of that, let's get those bandages freshened up." He started to unroll a strip of gauze.

"No - no, it's fine," said 10K, suppressing a sudden surge of anxiety. "I don't need it."

Doc paused, and looked up, an unbelieving look on his face. "Have you looked at yourself lately? You're still leaking blood, kid. Anyway, it's Warren's orders. She and the others'll bring back more bandages, maybe even some pills." He went back to unrolling the gauze.

10K swallowed hard around a lump in his throat, throwing a nervous glance over at Murphy without meaning to, before looking back at Doc. "Doc, no... really, I'm fine," he said hoarsely, mentally kicking himself. What was his problem? What was he thinking? He trusted Doc with his life, just like he had ever since meeting him... but he didn't want him changing any bandages. It was a new, wary instinct that he couldn't ignore, despite knowing how unnecessary it was.

"Don't argue with the doctor, kid. Infection's the last thing you need, believe me."

"What about Murphy? You can do his bandages - Addy will be back with more soon, she can do mine herself, she's done it this long..."

"Mine don't need a change," said Murphy, and to both 10K's and Doc's surprise, he sat up on his cot and swung his legs over the side, only grimacing a little. "I'm not even bleeding anymore. But you are, kid."

10K felt a flare of anger, which was immediately replaced by another pang of guilt. "No," he insisted, never-the-less. "I don't need it."

Doc paused again, a deep frown creasing his brow. He stared at 10K in confusion, and glanced over his shoulder at Murphy. "What's the matter, kid?" He finally asked, turning back to 10K.

"Nothing's the matter, I just don't want it, okay?" 10K met Doc's eyes.

Murphy glared across the space between them, looking between Doc and 10K. After a moment, he gave his chest a slight scratch. "I'll do it," he told Doc, standing with what looked like some difficulty, and moving across the aisle between the cots.

"No!" Growled 10K, and it made him cough, sending a few bubbles of blood up through the tube in his chest.

Doc sat back, looking thoroughly bewildered as he watched Murphy kneel beside him, next to 10K's cot.

"No," growled 10K again, shaking his head. "I mean it, I don't need it! Wait till Addy gets back - "

"No," Murphy echoed 10K's growl, and 10K fell silent. "It needs to be changed, so that's what we're going to do. They could be hours in town, so shut your mouth, and let me do it. Got it?" Even though his words were harsh, there was something softer in his eyes, and in the blue lines of his face.

10K didn't say anything, but he didn't try to move away as Murphy took the roll of gauze from Doc and tore off a few long strips.

As Murphy worked, 10K tried to avoid his gaze, but he couldn't help noticing how uncharacteristically gentle the man was being. Even so, the uncomfortable feeling in 10K's gut was building to new heights, so much so that he wanted to crawl out of his skin and burrow under the truck. He hated the feeling...it didn't make any sense, and he couldn't understand it, but he couldn't banish it, either, no matter how hard he tried.

Murphy laid the last strip of gauze around the tubing on 10K's chest, securing it with a length of medical tape, and held up the last few bits of bandage. "There's even some left over."

Doc was still watching them with a mixture of confusion and doubt on his face. When Murphy half-stood, Doc reached out and grabbed his arm. "Hey, Murphy... think you can make it out the back? Some fresh air might do some good."

Murphy opened his mouth to declare his skepticism, but closed it, catching the look in Doc's eye. He glanced back down at 10K, nodding once. "Sure, why not? Holler if you need anything, kid."

10K watched them move to the back and open the door. Doc jumped down and then turned to help Murphy, careful not to let him land too hard. Then, with a last look in at 10K, and a worried smile, he closed the door.

TEN MINUTES LATER, OUTSIDE THE TRUCK...

"Why the hell didn't you say anything about it sooner?!"

"Will you keep your voice down? It wasn't my place to tell anyone, it's his. Anyway, I have a good guess he doesn't want anyone knowing. He won't even look at me, 'cause he knows I know."

"Not your - not your place - you dumb, stubborn, zombie-headed idiot, you can't keep something like that from me!"

"Shut up, Doc! You want him to hear you?"

"You idiot... you idiot, no wonder he won't let us touch him. I can't believe you didn't say anything..." Doc ran a hand down his face, and leaned back against the closed door of the truck, bending down to brace his arms on his knees.

Murphy looked away, searching for words. "I didn't say anything 'cause the last thing he needs is to see it in your eyes that you know what happened," he finally said, looking grimly back at Doc. "He doesn't need to be thinking about it right now. Or hell, ever again - "

Doc stood up and shoved Murphy hard by both shoulders, hard enough that Murphy tripped backward before getting his balance again, gripping at his chest.

"Damn it, Doc, I've been shot! Are you trying to kill me?"

Doc took a few steadying breaths, glaring at Murphy. After a few prolonged minutes of silence, he opened his mouth, shut it, then opened it again. "Damn it..." he muttered, running his hand over his forehead again and leaning back against the truck. "I can't believe it. That sick, depraved... who the hell would go and...?" He stopped, levelling his gaze at Murphy again. "I knew you weren't telling us something. Well, what the hell are we supposed to do?"

"How should I know?"

"You were with him, you could help. You could say something - "

"I've tried a hundred times. He won't listen. He won't even look at me..." It was Murphy's turn to trail off, and for the first time since knowing him, Doc thought the man looked helpless.

"We have to do something," Doc insisted, out of breath. "We can't just ride off into the sunset, him thinking that's okay, thinking that's normal, that someone else might... that one of US might turn on him like that.."

"Trust me, he doesn't think it's okay." Murphy kicked angrily at a stone, sending it skipping across the sandy ground. "But he doesn't trust us. And... I have no idea what to do."

"We have to do something."

"Well, you let me know if you have any bright ideas, will you?" Snapped Murphy, angry now.

"You're the one he's listening to right now. God knows I never thought you had it in you, but there's something between the two of you now, some kind of bond. So do something about it."

INSIDE THE TRUCK...

10K lay still, his jaw clenched and his eyes fixed on the closed back door. He could hear raised voices, and snatches of the conversation from outside. Enough to leave him in no doubt that he was the subject of their discussion, but no matter how hard he listened, he couldn't make out exactly what they were saying. It left him feeling empty, and hollow. His breathing was slow and deliberate, but his mind had gone somewhat blank. He couldn't see a way out of it. Soon, all of them would know what had happened. He didn't mind so much if Addy knew... but the others; Warren, and Vasquez; what would they think of him? Would they treat him differently?

He startled as the back door was pulled open and Doc appeared, with Murphy behind him. Doc's face was shiny and his neck was red; he looked much the worse for wear. 10K didn't say anything as Doc climbed back up into the truck, and pulled Murphy in after him. He didn't say anything as the two of them settled themselves in their former places, Doc leaning against the back row of seats, and Murphy sitting on his makeshift cot. They had left the back door open, and a warm breeze ghosted in, ruffling 10K's hair. He still didn't speak.

Doc and Murphy seemed out of breath, and they were just as silent as 10K. It was easily the most painful silence that 10K had ever experienced, and it seemed to stretch on for an eternity. The tension could have been cut with a knife.

After what seemed like an hour of holding his breath, 10K heard Doc inhale sharply. "Listen, kid..." he started, looking over at 10K and reaching out a hand to the edge of his cot. 10K didn't move or flinch. "What.. what happened to you, well... I won't ever let anything like that happen again."

10K cast around in his thoughts for something to say, for a way to respond, but he could only see Warren, Addy, and Vasquez in his mind's eye. He gave an involuntary shudder.

Doc saw this, and he moved closer, reaching his hand out like he wanted to put it on 10K's shoulder, but he wasn't sure if he should. "You can trust me, 10K. I love you, kid."

At Doc's words, 10K felt a wall crumbling. He tried to hold onto it, tried to keep it in place, but he couldn't. And he didn't even want to. He knew Doc was telling the truth. The backs of his eyes burned with held-back tears. "Don't tell the rest of them," he pleaded, almost in a whisper.

"Okay," said Doc, sounding immensely relieved that 10K had spoken. "Okay, we won't. If you ever want to, you can, but I give you my word, I won't tell them."

10K's eyes flickered over to Murphy, and a tear escaped, sliding down his cheek.

Murphy watched him from across the aisle, his hands clasped tightly in his lap. "I won't tell 'em either," he promised, swallowing. "Hand to God, not a word. But kid... You gotta know. Doc's right. We won't let something like that happen again... you have to trust us."

10K didn't say anything. Instead of the all-consuming, inescapable humiliation he'd been fearing would overwhelm him if anyone ever spoke about what had happened, a sense of calm was draping over him like a blanket. Another tear fell down his cheek and he wiped it away, taking in as deep a breath as he could. The unsettled feeling, the discomfort he'd felt at being alone with Murphy and Doc, was being replaced by calm, tired resignation.

"D'you... d'you want some time alone?" Doc asked cautiously, and 10K saw that the older man's eyes were shining with carefully controlled emotion.

Doc made to stand, but 10K lifted his hand and closed it around Doc's wrist before he even knew what he was doing. "Stay," he said under his breath.

Doc sank back to the floor, and reached over with his other hand to cover 10K's fingers. "Okay," he said, and he didn't say anything else. But he didn't move from that spot, and 10K didn't let go of his arm. They stayed that way until 10K drifted off to sleep, the first real sleep he'd gotten in over two days. His fingers loosened around Doc's wrist, and Doc lifted up the boy's arm, letting it rest on the cot at 10K's side. He stared at the boy's face for a long moment, then reached out, pulling the blanket up to just below 10K's chest, and gently brushing some hair away from his forehead. "You're gonna be okay, kid," he whispered. "You're a survivor."

Behind them, Murphy watched in silence, and ran a hand over his short hair. Doc turned to look at him, his light blue eyes yielding depths of unspeakable worry. "It's up to us then," he told Murphy. "Warren can't fix this, Addy can't... we can't, either. But we're gonna see him through it."

Murphy nodded slowly, looking back down at 10K. "That's the first time he's said anything about it out loud," he said quietly. "He trusts you. I was right to tell you." It was like he was trying to convince himself.

"Yeah, you were. And you're gonna help me deal with it."

Fin

A/N: Thank you to everyone who supported this story! There may be a sequel coming, because you all inspire me so much!