This is my first time writing and publishing Sherlock fanfiction, and I come into this world apprehensive and nervous. I have always been a massive Sherlock fan, but writing him daunts me, as I want to do the fandom justice.

'The' Verses will be a collection of short stories that deal with our favourite boys overcoming and living with struggles such as suicide, self harm, sexual assault, domestic abuse and drug addiction. I imagine they will all be Johnlock.

This song that helped me write this story was Johnny Stimson – Holding On.

The first story in "'The' Verses" series. Anyone who knew Sherlock could never imagine him being in a relationship. However, as John and Sherlock grow closer, John begins to realise his partner's aversion to relationships and sex may not be as he first assumed.

Warnings for mentions of sexual assault (non-explicit), domestic abuse and sexual content.

The Virgin

Anyone who knew Sherlock could never imagine him being in a relationship. It was hard enough to find people who would put up with his personality to be a friend, let alone more. It is not as if he did not have people interested. Women and men had both tried, eliciting no reciprocation from the consulting detective. From the very beginning, John had been told Sherlock was married to his work, and that was the end of any conversations involving relationships. John had assumed Sherlock was not interested in such trivial things. Thinking about it, Sherlock would never be able to find someone on his intellectual level anyway, so what was the point settling with some one "boring". Someone like him, the doctor thought.

The first time John realised he had feelings for the eccentric man was when he had a bomb strapped to his body. Nearly dying has this awful ability of making you realise your deepest feelings, even if you had not even remotely realised they were there in the first place. The look in Sherlock's eyes had haunted John's dreams, because they had almost looked like the detective had felt them same. But no, as soon as they left the swimming pool, Sherlock was acting as nothing had ever happened. Almost daily John had to remind himself that Sherlock was married to his work.

It was a few months later that the unthinkable happened.

John was used to nightmares, they were much less frequent since he moved into Baker Street, but they still happened. Waking up in a cold sweat, the soldier took deep breaths to calm his racing heart. Relaxing again, John heard a scream from downstairs. The doctor shot out of bed, grabbing his gun before creeping down the steps. There was no one in the living room, and more noises from Sherlock's room told him the commotion was coming from in there. He listened closely, but he could only hear Sherlock's low voice. With military precision, John quickly swung open the door and pointed his gun into the room. All John found was a stressed detective in the centre of his bed, alone, and pulling at his sheets desperately. It seemed even the genius had nightmares.

Sherlock screamed again before mumbling nonsense John could not make out. Putting his gun down on the bedside table, John ignored his rational side and leant over to wake the detective, bracing himself for the younger man to lash out as he woke. Instead, as John touched the younger man, Sherlock jolted in a panic and recoiled to the edge of the bed.

"Sherlock?" John asked to see if Sherlock had woken up.

"Don't." Sherlock pleaded in no more than a whisper.

"It's ok Sherlock, it's John. Just John." The doctor said in a soothing manner, trying to calm the detective out of his nightmare.

John slowly sat on the edge of the bed, keeping as far away from Sherlock as possible to give him the space. The detective began to writhe under the sheets again, just as John hoped he was waking up. Learning from his mistake, John did not reach out for the younger man again, but instead repeated "you're ok" and "its just John" in calming tones.

Sherlock's breath finally began to even out, his body relaxing into the bed.

Hoping this was the last of the nightmare and not wanting to wake the detective now he was finally in a peaceful sleep, John quietly eased himself off the bed and crept towards the door.

"Joh-n?" Came a confused, braking voice from behind the doctor. Turning around, John's eyes met with Sherlock's. The usually guarded expression was so breathtakingly full of emotion that it truly shocked John. The soldier felt like he was imposing a private moment, he had never even imagined the detective could look so vulnerable.

"Ugh, I'm sorry, I tried not to wake you." John breathed. Even though Sherlock was now awake, it seemed wrong to speak above a whisper.

Sherlock began to shakily pull himself up in the bed, falling back against headboard with a loud exhale.

"It's quite alright, John." Sherlock stated, his usual mask of indifference falling back into place.

" Do y-, um, do you, maybe, you know, want to talk about it?" John stuttered. The soldier was completely in the deep end. The self-proclaimed sociopath had just displayed over one hundred times the amount of emotion John thought he was ever capable of.

"I wouldn't want to bother you with such trivialities. Thank you for your concern though." Sherlock said with disinterest, however, the younger man's eyes did not meet John's.

"Right." John said, unsure of how to continue the conversation. Somehow it didn't feel right to leave. Sherlock's pulse was still elevated, even though he was trying to cover it up by breathing in small, controlled pants. His eyes were darting around the room, and it looked as if he was holding back tears. Well it would have if John thought Sherlock was capable of such 'sentiment'.

Having had enough of John staring at him across the room, Sherlock shakily pulled himself to the edge of the bed. He was about to make a start for the living room when he realised he was naked.

"Honestly, I'm fine, John. Go back to sleep."

John swallowed, trying not to look at his very naked, very male housemate. Now is not the time, John. He reprimanded himself.

"You don't look very 'fine', Sherlock." John lectured. "Look, you don't need to talk about it, but you do need to go back to sleep. You haven't slept since we got the last case four days ago."

"Irrelevant. I've functioned with a lot less before now." Sherlock stated stubbornly, still sat at the end of the bed, clutching the sheet around him.

"I don't care, I wasn't there to make you sleep then. Come on, lay back down." John pressed. The younger man really did need to sleep. He was as white as a ghost.

Sherlock let out a frustrated sigh. "I'm not going to be able to sleep again now."

John noticed how quiet and soft his voice went, and understood the detective wasn't trying to be difficult. Of all people, John knew the fear of going back to sleep after a nightmare. Not even just the fear, but how difficult it was to let your body relax, to become completely vulnerable when you had just has all the physiological reactions of being in grave danger. He desperately wanted to know what the great Sherlock Holmes could ever fear. But it wasn't his place to push.

"I understand." John started. At this Sherlock's eyes finally darted to the soldiers. "I really do. But it's only going to be worse the next time you sleep if you don't get fully rested now."

Sherlock could see in John's eyes. He really did understand.

"So what do you suggest, Doctor?" Sherlock tried to joke. He desperately hoped John had a way to help him.

John tried to think. The soldier knew what he needed in times like this. The only thing that seemed to work was either a high dose of sleeping tablets, or someone sleeping beside him. The feeling of someone beside him reminded his unconscious self that he wasn't in the setting of his dream. Just the comfort of knowing someone was close to stop the nightmare alone was enough to allow him to relax and fall asleep. And anyway, drugs were out of the question for Sherlock.

"Lay down." John said again, moving to the opposite side of the bed that Sherlock was on, picking up the discarded duvet on the floor.

"I'm not a child, John." Sherlock pouted, eyes widening at the realisation that John was climbing into bed with him.

"Well you sure act like it sometimes." John joked whilst placing the duvet over himself, arranging it so Sherlock could easily slip underneath it too. To save the detectives modesty, John lay on top of the sheet, using just the duvet for warmth.

"I-" Sherlock stuttered. The younger man did not seem to know what to do. He was still sitting on the edge of the bed; shivering slightly due to the fact only a thin sheet covered him.

"I'm not going to touch you again. I'm going to lie on this side and you will lie on that side. But if you have a nightmare again, I can wake you up before it gets to that stage again, ok?" John reassured.

Sherlock couldn't deny that having the soldier beside him would help him relax enough to sleep. Begrudgingly, Sherlock swung his legs back into bed and pulled the warm duvet over his shivering body. He kept wrapped in the sheet, though loosened it slightly so he didn't become too warm.

"Let's just hope Mrs Hudson doesn't walk in." Sherlock said gravely.

John and Sherlock looked at each other for the first time since they climbed into bed together; neither could supress the fit of giggles that erupted between them. After that, the awkwardness was broken, and both men relaxed into comfortable positions. John kept himself awake until he could hear Sherlock's breathing even out.

Seeing Sherlock asleep did nothing to abide John's growing feelings for the detective. If possible, he looked even younger. He was angled towards John, his hands curled under his chin with his elbows hugged into his chest. How the detective was comfortable, John would never know. His black curls were slightly knotted, making them point in random directions, but if anything this made him look more adorable. It was nice to see a version of Sherlock that wasn't completely put together, because in this moment, he looked completely human.

Knowing that Sherlock was peacefully asleep, John let himself fall into a light doze, hyperaware of Sherlock sleeping beside him in case he needed to protect him from his nightmares.

Constructive criticism and advice is much appreciated. I will update every Wednesday.