A/N:: Hey everyone! So I'm very excited about this fic- the idea actually came from another one of mine that I was working on 'to find a way back' when the idea for this took over. At first I was going to transform it and morph it into this fic, but I was worried that it might cause confusion.

So, here we are!

This fic jumps right in, assuming you know the juicy details of their relationship. But don't worry, its going to work its way back, in what I hope, will be a really sweet, angsty story.

This fic is rated M for a reason, so readers with sensitive imaginations, you've been warned!

And as always, reviews are welcome!

Inuyasha squeezed his eyes shut. He could feel the sun beating down on him, the warm rays making him break a sweat.

Or so he assumed. Was he sick? What time was it? It wasn't like him to be asleep during the day.

Reluctantly, he tried to sit up. His clawed hands instantly flew to his head. His body was shaking; his thoughts were spinning.

What was going on? Where the Hell was he?

"You've awoken, Inuyasha?" The voice cut through his pounding headache.

"K-Kikyou?" He asked, cracking an eye open.

They were in the woods, and from what he could tell, they were nowhere near her village. He squinted, trying to determine their location from his surroundings.

How did he get here? Why would he be asleep… with Kikyo nearby? He… he couldn't remember!

"Kikyo…" He started, the pitch of his voice hurting his own ears. "…Whats going on?"

"Tell me, what is the last thing you remember?" she asked, her voice cold and sterile.

He tried to focus. He sifted through his memories, a hazy feeling setting over him.

"I- I think the last thing I remember is-" He looked around. That couldn't be right. "We were at the docks." He blushed slightly.

They had embraced. He had never been bold enough to presume he could lay a hand on her, not one out of kindness anyway. It was beyond his wildest ambitions that he could have held her intimately.

She had stumbled, and out of reflex he had gone to catch her. Kikyo had looked up at him, shy and grateful… and then she wrapped her arms around him, even rested her head against his chest.

He had been so happy he thought his heart would explode.

The last person to treat him without disgust, hell, the last person to hold him, had been his mother. He felt small and anxious, nervous and excited in her embrace.

He knew then that it was the right choice. He would use the jewel to become human, just like she suggested.

If it meant that he could hold her again, he would sell his soul. He wouldn't have to be alone anymore.

But that couldn't be the last thing that happened. They were nowhere near the water. And she-

The hanyou focused his attention on the Miko.

She was-

She was dead.

"K-Ki-Kikyo…." He stumbled on his words. "Wh-What happened?" He breathed out, his words rushed in concern. He stood to his feet, unsteadily making his way towards her. "Why do you smell-"

"Deceased?" She asked bluntly.

"Whats wrong with me? Did the wish go wrong?" He asked worriedly. "Somethings not right." He looked around panicked.

"You are correct, Inuyasha. You are missing a gap of time, but that may be because of the blast. You hit your head."

"My head? Blast? Kikyo, please… explain whats going on? Why do you smell like grave soil?"

She let out a deep sigh.

"Please, sit Inuyasha. I will fill in the holes for you."

He nodded, his eyes wide. He was trying his hardest not to breathe through his nose.

"You and I decided to use the Shikon, to turn you into a human, do you remember that?" She looked at him, observing his reactions. He nodded in affirmation.

"Good. It is quite a complicated story, so I will try to simplify it for you, considering your state. There was a thief that was badly burned, whom I nursed for a period of time. He was in love with me-"

Panic struck the hanyou. Fell in love? With Kikyo? There was a rival for her?

"Yet he also lusted for the jewel. He merged with multiple demons, to gain power. He tried to gain the jewel, and in battle… I was killed."

"Killed…"

So it was true. She was… dead…

"But how-"

"I was brought back by fate, Inuyasha. Our fate. It is our duty to stop the demon that stole the jewel and took my natural life- Naraku. In the battle, the jewel was shattered. We have been piecing it together, you and I."

"This is-"

"It is a lot to handle, we recently fought a demon who had a shard and the resulting blast rendered you unconscious. I believe that caused you to lose bits of your memory."

He looked around him, trying to concentrate. So much had happened. So much that he couldn't remember. Nothing made sense.

But he was here. And he was with Kikyo. He had apparently died… and was somehow brought back to him. It seemed impossible. But he trusted her. Why would she lie?

"My head is killing me." He complained.

"You should rest. I have set a barrier, and you are quite safe."

"I don't like to sleep. Especially during the day." He grunted.

"Do as you please then." She shrugged, sitting next to him.

The hanyou leaned his head against the trunk of the tree, closing his eyes. His ears were trained on the surroundings, but the light felt like daggers.

He felt a nagging in the back of his mind. It was faint and fleeting.

It hurt.

"Inuyasha, you NEED to rest! How can you expect to-"

"Ugh, I don't want to." He complained reflexively.

"Did you say something, Inuyasha?"

His mind felt like a fog was over it. Whatever inner voice that was, it pulled at him.

Painfully.

"No…" He breathed out, shaking his head.

That must have been some Hell of a blast.

~.~

"Do you want to stop back at the village, Kagome?" Sango asked, a sad smile on her face. "We don't mind waiting a few extra days if you want to go back to your home."

Kagome readjusted her bag over her shoulders. In the past few months, she had learned the weight of her modern essentials.

Sure, she had carried the bag on her own. But whenever it started to strain her, even slightly, it was taken from her by the hanyou, as he effortlessly slung it over his shoulder with one hand.

But he was gone. He had been for months.

She tried her best to smile back at the slayer. She was so considerate.

Everyone had been, really. Since the day he left, everyone had been so supportive.

Sango hugged her, telling her she understood if she needed to leave, to go back home for good. Shippo cried. Miroku offered kind words.

In the end, she refused them. The fight with Naraku was just as much hers as it was everyone elses. Just because Inuyasha decided to leave them, didn't mean she would abandon her friends. She could sense the shards, and she would continue to do her job, so long as they would have her.

They had been so thankful, so relieved. They truly had become a family in the years they spent together.

Kagome tried her best to smile brightly.

"Nah, Im fine Sango. Ever since I graduated high school theres really no reason for me to go back as much as I used to, aside from restocking supplies or checking in with Mama."

"Too bad Inuyasha is such an idiot. He wouldn't believe she said that about-"

The fox demon was effectively thumped on the head with Mirokus staff.

"Really guys, I don't know how many times I have to say it." She walked over to Shippo to rub his head. "Im okay. Its okay to talk about him. It wasn't just me he left… it was all of us."

"While that is true Kagome, we are not such fools to know that our relationships are different from what yours was with Inuyasha." The monk said kindly.

"Even still," she said releasing a sigh, "we all loved him. It hurt all of us. Pain is pain, right? I'd rather not avoid talking about him. Im doing much better than I was- really."

"Kagome…" Sango softened her eyes sympathetically.

"He did what he had to. We all knew Kikyo would come for him one day. Im just… Im just thankful she didn't bring him to Hell." She gave a small laugh. "Besides, its not like she dragged him anywhere. He went of his own free will." She tried to steel her voice. "He made his choice."

"Oh Kagome. If we ever come across him, Im going to-"

"If its for my sake, don't." Kagome cut off the slayers violent thoughts. "If we ever run into him… I hope at that time I can wish him the best… and see him happy." She said biting her lower lip, trying to blink back the tears. "If you have something to say to him, of your own feelings, that's different. Don't hold a grudge against him for me. He has been hated enough in his life." She finished gently.

"You're too good, Lady Kagome." Miroku said with a sigh. "I do not know of anyone else who would look at the situation in such a way."

"Yeah, seriously. If it were me, I'd sit him so hard beads would break." Shippo said, crossing his arms.

The fox demon had been badly hurt by Inuyashas departure. For all the fighting they did, the kit had loved him.

"Well, Ive had a few months to think it over. If the feudal era has taught me anything, its tht violence shouldn't be the first response."

"Well said." Miroku nodded in agreement.

"Anyway, I don't need to go back, were good on supplies, and we still have day light ahead of us. Lets go as far as we can, eh?" She asked the group.

Walking at a slower pace then they ever had with the hanyou in tow, the slayer, monk, fox and cat demon made their way, following the rumor of a shard, a strong, heartbroken miko leading them with a planted smile.

~.~

Kikyo smiled to herself. Things were finally going just as she wanted.

It was months ago that she had called Inuyasha too her.

She had found a village, small like the one she had grown up in, with a handful of laughing children, and a kind headsman.

For the first time, she had wanted to stay.

They had been in need of a Miko, and she had been in need of companionship.

When she was alive, she was used to solitude- or so she had thought. She would spend many hours alone, having no one that she could rely on to tell her trouble to.

But she had not realized what an impact the community had played in her life. The children would surround her, take walks and gather herbs. The villagers would stop to chat pleasantries, the elderly would bow to her, the woman would thank her.

She had not realized it, but she was not quite as alone as she had thought.

When she was brought back, recalled from the grave- that was when she had understood true solitude.

She would float from place to place, but sooner or later she would be uncovered.

A nosy villager, a lovers tryst in the woods, a sneaky child, it varied. Sooner or later someone would see her calling to her beasts, surviving on the soul of dead women.

And as expected, she would be chased out.

This village had been special.

It held felt like home.

She hadnt had a desire to plant roots so strongly since she had started walking the Earth again. It felt like she was reliving memories of her past.

Perhaps that's why it hurt so badly when she was cast out.

That's why she needed Inuyasha.

He always came when she called. He did not care if she were dead or living, if she survived on rice or on souls.

He was there.

Sure, he wasn't the chattiest of company, nor her first choice.

But it would be better than the silence. Better than the emptiness.

She had liked him at one point, at a friend at least. Maybe if she spent time with him, she could feel that way once more.

Or so she had thought.

Kikyo had not expected that when he came, he would have done so with lead feet. Every step he took seemed pained, as if it weighed him down.

He did not engage in conversation, nor had she found herself wanting it. He was angry and jittery, constantly on the look out, for demons… for the woman he left behind…

She was no fool. She knew that his presence was only temporary. He could not handle being away from that makeshift group. From her reincarnation.

Kikyo would be damned if it would end that way, letting him leave her.

It had been simple to alter his memories. The correct herbs, the right magic.

It was something she had never did before, only heard of in legends. She was unsure of how long the effects would last, the extent of the memories he would lose. But from all accounts she could recall, the effect had been permanent.

It was a chance for a fresh start. It was a chance to rewrite their history in a way that had a favorable outcome.

Kikyo gave a satisfied sigh.

After all she had endured, she deserved this.