Hobbies

by TiamatisObscure

Every ninja of Konoha was expected to get a hobby, eventually. Most hobbies were pretty obvious and visible. Take Kakashi's reading, or Tsunade's gambling, or Jiraiya's peeping.

Others were less immediately evident. Who ever would have guessed that Ibiki stitched dolls together in his spare time? Or that Shikaku whittled ridiculously elaborate pieces for his shogi sets?

Some hobbies were selected to appeal to that particular hobbyist's abilities. Ibiki's dolls, for example, were often proportional and completed with inner organs and marked nerve clusters. Jiraiya always did claim that his peeping was for the purposes of honing his stealth skills and his escape tactics. Yes, this kind of thing is often the case among the ninja of Konoha.

Ninja are generally high strung; their missions often left them paranoid and restless. So some of them picked up habits that were just the opposite of what they went through in the field. Like Kakashi's books, and Shikaku's whittling.

In every generation, though, there are a few shinobi who develop hobbies that are so out of character that they are passed down in legend.

"Hey, Uchiha! It's your turn for watch!"

"Hn," Itachi grunted. "I will require another minute, Kisame-san." He returned to his notebook, paused, and looked up once more. "Kisame-san?"

"Yeah, kid?" He returned absentmindedly.

"Do you have a spare cloak? And cotton bandages?"

Kisame blinked in surprise, turning to face Itachi. "Sure, you can have 'em, but why do you want 'em?"

Itachi envisioned the mannequin that he kept back at base, the lovely black ruffles on the bodice of it's western-styled ballgown, and the large satin bow that he planned to attach to the back. "I require more material for a specialized project of mine. While it is mostly complete, I need a little extra fabric before Akasuna-san deems it satisfactory."

"Oh. Well, here it is."

"Thank you."

A week after the conversation in the woods, Itachi put the final touches on the pleated skirt.

"It is complete, Akasuna-san"

"Excellent work, right on time." Sasori examined the dress. "It will fit perfectly."

Sasori unsealed the Third Kazekage and eyed the puppet's frame. A few minutes later, and the puppet was wrapped in a froth of lace and black and scarlet fabric, with a set of red dancing shoes rounding out the look. Sasori looked pleased at the disturbing effect. He sealed it into it's scroll.

"I'll be taking him out dancing next Tuesday."

After all, Konoha wasn't the only shinobi village with disturbed ninja, and Sasori always did believe that you could still embarrass people even after death.

The Third Kazekage slammed his head onto the table in the afterlife. All around him, people giggled, smirked, or laughed openly at the image his body made.

"I always knew there was something wrong with that kid." The Third Kazekage sighed and braced himself for the onslaught of teasing.

"Whoever thought that death came with eternal peace was an idiot."