One Year Later

"Dan?" Phil yelled from the kitchen. "I burned the chicken again, come help me!"

I sighed and shut my computer. "Not again!" I laughed and walked down the hallway into the kitchen. "That's the third time! Now I have to go out and buy another one if we want to eat!" I tried to be mad at him but I couldn't help but laugh.

"You shouldn't put me in charge of something as important as dinner!" Phil laughed with me and I kissed him on the forehead.

"I'll go out and get some more chicken," I offered. "Should I pick up some ice cream too or can I trust you to bake cookies or something?"

"You should pick up some ice cream," Phil said without hesitation and we both laughed again. I grabbed my wallet and phone and started to head out the door.

"Maybe while you're out you could make one more stop?" Phil asked.

"Sure what?"

"Maybe….I don't know… the.. cemetary?"

I stopped and sighed. Phil had been trying to convince me to visit Emily's grave since that night but I had refused to go. I've done everything I could to push her out of my mind but every time I looked at Phil all those memories came back.

We were so close to death that night.

I know I said I forgave Emily. And I did. But the next few days after that made it so hard. I got out of the hospital before Phil but I couldn't stay with him at night but during the day all we did was hold hands in silence. We talked a little about youtube and what we were planning on doing about the whole situation because we've been gone from the internet for almost a week and the phandom was already freaking out. I sent out a tweet saying we were ok and we'd be back soon but I knew they were going to need more than that.

But other than that, Phil didn't say much at all. He just laid in my arms and I would play with his hair and kiss him on the forehead once or twice. But just to be together finally was enough for me.

But even though Emily nearly killed him, Phil still did everything he could to convince me to go visit her grave. Cemeteries creep me out already, there was no way in hell I was going in there especially if Emily is buried there.

"Please Dan," Phil begged. "She died thinking that you forgave her and if you don't go see her then she might not believe you were telling the truth."

"She's dead Phil," I told him. "She won't know anything because she's dead."

Phil sighed and kissed me on the cheek. "It's your decision but it's the right thing to do," and he walked out of the room.

I went to the store and bought us some dinner and decided to walk home instead of taking the lift. If it was dark out I wouldn't have but the sun was setting and there was still people wandering here and there so I wasn't too worried.

I planned on heading back to the flat but for some reason I found myself walking down the wrong streets toward the other side of town. I tried to turn around but I always found myself walking toward the same place every time. Walking toward the cemetery.

Soon I found myself outside the gate staring inside at all the gravestones lined up next to each other. It was weird to think about how some of these people could have died from illness, or in a car crash, or there could even be some police officers or firefighters in here who died saving someone.

And then there is Emily.

I walked into the center of the cemetery where Grace, Mia and Leo were buried and Emily right beside them. We couldn't afford a new gravestone for her so we used her old one that claimed she died in 2013.

Because it was basically true.

And then that night we found a red handprint on Emily's shoulder so we assumed that Grace decided to pull her out of hell because she missed her. But that plan didn't go so well.

I stood in front of Emily's grave for what seemed like forever. I didn't know what I was doing or what I was suppose to do. Was I supposed to say something? It's not like I had anything to say. I was so tempted to leave and never come back but I knew I had to do this. For Phil. And for her.

"I think we've finally settled back in," I started. What the hell was I doing? "It took awhile; a lot longer than I thought it would but I think things are finally returning back to normal." I paused and took a breath before continuing. "We decided not to tell our fans about what happened so we just told them we had some personal issues and they're not pressuring us to tell or anything so that's good."

After that it didn't feel weird. It just felt like I was talking to a friend.

"Tyler, Chris and PJ constantly text us making sure we are ok. If we disappear off the internet for more than a few hours they will freak out and they have threatened to come to our house if we don't answer them." I laughed at my own words. I could almost hear her laughing with me.

I didn't know what else to say so I decided to get straight to the point.

"I hope you know that what you did was wrong. And you should know that I didn't really want to come here and talk to you because I'm still hurt from that night. You caused a lot of chaos to my life and Phil's and I hope you know how much pain you caused both of us."

I sighed and felt relieved of finally speaking about that after keeping it in for so long. But then I proceeded to pull something out of my pocket. It was a ring that Louise helped me pick out. It was silver with a very small diamond on it and I had chosen to engrave the date 10-19-09 inside of it just because why not?

I showed it to Emily. "All the same, I'm glad you did it. I'm glad you did what you did. Because if you didn't I probably would have never realized how much I really loved Phil. And I would have never told him or found out that he felt the same. I would have lived my whole life possibly without him because I was too afraid of rejection. I was too afraid to love him. And he could have died that night. We both could have. And then I could have never told him. You are part of the reason why I'm going to ask him tonight. I'm going to ask him if he wants to spend the rest of his life with someone who will love him and care about him more than anything."

I started crying at the thought. Spending the rest of my life with Phil. It sounded amazing.

"So I just wanted to say thank you," I finished. "And I forgive you. I always have. Please never forget that."

I took one last look at her grave and then turned and walked away.

And I never went back.

When I arrived back at the flat it was almost 9pm. I hadn't realized how long it took to get home but Phil was just playing mario cart in the living room. I could tell that he was relieved to see me though.

"Hi," he said.

"Hi," I sat down on the couch and wrapped my arms around his waist. As he was finishing his race I laid my neck on his shoulder and closed my eyes and thought about what would happen if we were going to spend the rest of our lives together. I imagined that we would stay on youtube and accomplish so many things that were bigger than what we had ever done before. We would come out to the fans and they would be happy and support us. We would grow old together and spend our nights cuddling on the couch and watching anime.

It sounded amazing. All I had to do was ask him.

I felt Phil kiss me on my head and I opened my eyes.

"I think you fell asleep," Phil laughed. I smiled and looked up at him and he kissed me again. "It's too late to make the chicken; do you want to just order pizza?"

"Sounds great," I nodded.

Phil got up and started walking out of the room and I decided that if it wasn't now it might be never.

"Phil," I called. He stopped and turned around. I got off the couch and walked over to him and just pulled him into a hug. He didn't say anything but he pulled me tight.

"Thank you," I told him.

I could feel a smile appear on his face. "For what?" he asked.

I pulled away. "For everything. Everything you have ever done for me and others. For saving me in the year I needed you most and being the one person that has always believed in me, accepted me and loved me when no one else did and when no one else ever would. The list of things you have ever done for me is endless but I love you and I thank you for all of them."

Phil smiled. I took a deep breath and pulled out the ring that was still in my back pocket. Phil's eyes widened and he started crying as I got down on one knee.

"Phil Lester, would you please make me the happiest man in the universe and please marry me?"

"Yes," Phil said nearly a half a second after I finished. "Of course it's yes Dan, why did you have to even ask?" He started sobbing and I did too as he kissed me and then hugged me once more as if he never wanted to let me go.

"I love you so much," I said into his shoulder. "I always have and I always will."

"You promise?"

"I promise."

And I never, ever break my promises.

Thank you sooooo much for reading this fanfic! I really enjoyed writing it and it was first ever Dan and Phil fanfic so I'm very proud of it.

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Thank you! :)