Words Don't Come Easy

Azula has to tell her.

She knows that she has to tell her before it is too late, but she has too much pride. It is more than difficult to yield to her feelings. She does not operate like that. She cannot let anyone know that she does feel sometimes, or that she feels strongly about this.

Azula has to tell her she loves her, because Ty Lee is getting married in the morning, and Azula knows that if she could be honest, Ty Lee would break it off and they would be together again.

Why is this so hard? Azula lies awake and curses every single thought that goes through her head.

She should let go and allow Ty Lee to go through with this. There is no decent reason to continue the charade of love. Princess Azula is incapable of love and she wants to keep it that way.

But it's almost morning and Azula cannot sleep. She tosses and turns and burns until she singes her sheets and stands up. Azula tries to make herself look hotter and then walks down the hall to go find the girl staying here until she weds her boyfriend. Zuko thought it would be nicer than a hotel, but Azula is certain that he just did it to torment her.

Ty Lee is sitting awake, staring out of her window.

Azula thinks it is a dream for a moment.

"May I kiss the bride?" Azula asks, and Ty Lee barely shrugs her shoulders. "That was funny. You can laugh."

"It wasn't funny," Ty Lee mumbles.

"Why do you look so pensive?" Azula asks. She should not have done that. Ty Lee did not fall in love with an Azula who tries to play nice. But saying it feels right for some inexplicable reason.

"I'm just nervous. I mean, excited," Ty Lee says. Her voice sounds small, because she is not very good at hiding her feelings.

"You are scared," Azula says in a matter-of-fact fashion. Ty Lee nods. She still does not turn around to look. "I can imagine you would be. You have always been flighty about relationships."

Ty Lee begins to unravel her braid. Azula does not know why it and it puts her on edge.

"What do you want? This is why I told Zuko he didn't need to…"

"Well, you certainly have had plenty of help from him in making yourself a mock royal wedding. Shame he's just some rich boy and not some kind of divine ruler."

"I'm not attracted to money or power."

Azula laughs. "Yes, you are. Who isn't?"

"You don't want me to do this, because you don't want me to be happy."

"No. I don't want you to do this because I want me to be happy."

"Of course. That's why I'm not marrying you. I'm not even thinking about you ever."

"That's a lie."

"How do you know? Do you think about me a lot?"

"I think about us, who we were when we were young and things were easy. I just came to see if you wanted to have sex with me."

"I guessed from the pick-up line." Ty Lee smiles to herself. "You didn't come here to try to get me to have sex with you. You came to ask me not to get married."

"That is wishful thinking, Ty Lee."

The night is briefly silent, until Ty Lee sighs softly.

"This is really your last chance. You're kind of wasting it."

"If you know so well, why do you need me to tell you?"

"Tell me what? You have something on your mind. I don't need an apology, and I don't know what is true with you, so I…" Ty Lee sighs again. "You're usually lying when you say nice things. You want you to be happy pretty bad."

"I love you." That was startlingly easy.

Ty Lee is startled easily, and shocked by the statement. Azula has never said that, ever.

"What?" Ty Lee loudly asks.

"Don't make me say it again," Azula snaps.

"Say it again," Ty Lee whispers, her eyes wide.

"I love you." It is harder the second time, somehow. "I also think that I am the best romantic option for you. I think that you would be so much happier with…" Azula sees Ty Lee slipping away. "I think that I would be so much happier with you."

Ty Lee stands up and sits down on the foot of her bed. She pats next to her and Azula holds back a comment about not being a dog. Azula sits down next to Ty Lee and tries not to think about how their bare knees are gently touching.

"You're pretty desperate for this." Ty Lee has to admit it.

"Yes. I am." Azula tries to look disinterested but it is too late. "I believe that you met this man a few months ago. We have grown together and I have always imagined growing with you even longer. That is how it is supposed to happen. I get what I want and I want to try to make things… bloom between us."

"That's really pretty." Ty Lee is almost crying. But Azula has said really pretty things a thousand times before.

"What if it was just winter? Our relationship was in winter and you ran off to go somewhere sunny and now you don't want to come back for springtime."

"We've had a lot of nasty breakups. And a couple fistfights."

"Winter comes more than once in a lifetime," Azula snaps.

Ty Lee sighs from utter exasperation this time. It is not a soft, sweet sigh. It is tired and angry.

"Stop the metaphor-ing. It's frustrating. I'm gonna lose him because you always know the right thing to say. It's not ever true. You say those words that make me think you're this perfect princess and everything will be good. But it's always just you being smooth or something."

Azula smirks.

"Well, I am smooth," she says. "It is also your fault for believing me so many times. However, I will forgive you because I love you."

"Forgive me for what?" Ty Lee asks loudly, bewildered.

As if it is obvious, Azula says, "For believing my lies and then ruining our relationship by getting upset about it."

Ty Lee rolls her eyes. "You don't grow up. We don't grow together."

"Yes, we do. Well, alright, that was all I had prepared. I just thought if I told you my feelings, maybe you would consider giving springtime a chance. Everyone who said being honest was a liar and I should go find someone like you. Because there are a lot of girls like you in the world."

"There are."

"No, there aren't. I was being sarcastic. You are the only person who I…" Azula squints at her feet. "Good luck, I suppose. I will kill him if he ever hurts you. No one is permitted to break your heart but me."

Ty Lee chews on her lip.

"And you're gonna break my heart a lot if I let you in. You don't change. I know you think you can or that you do, but you don't bloom or whatever your distracting words are this time."

"Ty Lee…" Azula does not know what to do. This was supposed to work. "I was never lying when I said the right things."

Ty Lee is crying, but she forces herself to say what must be said. "Then you were wrong a lot of times. Please, just let me sleep tonight. You were perfect for me once but not anymore."

Azula stands up. She turns to leave and slows down once she reaches the door because she expects Ty Lee to call for her to come back.

She doesn't.