As he pulled his car into the parking lot, he scanned the crowds of people enjoying the sunny afternoon at this popular spot.

Looking past the happy families and laughing children, he spotted who he was looking for. A lone figure, sat on the top of the cliff, off the beaten path, staring out at the ocean.

"Damn you G. You know I hate this place," he grumbled to himself as he grabbed a couple of bottles of water and started the long, slightly treacherous climb to where Callen was sitting.

He stopped panting heavily as he got to the top, and took a moment to enjoy the view of the vast ocean vista, broken only by a lone cargo ship in the distance and a few catamarans enjoying the offshore breeze.

"What do you want?" Callen's voice, almost lost in the breeze jogged him out of his musings.

"Nothing," Sam said as he eased his bulk on the grass beside his partner. "Just walking."

Sam handed Callen a bottle of water, and noted with a slight stab of disappointment that he checked the seal before opening it.

It had been a long time since Callen had stopped doing that with things Sam gave him, and it hurt to think that whatever was going on with his friend, they had gone back to that.

"Weren't you supposed to be spending the day with Michelle and the kids?

Sam shrugged, "Aiden went back to the academy early, Michelle and Kam went to have their nails done, not my thing."

Callen gave a small smirk. "I don't know, a small manny paddy would do you some good."

Sam sighed, but smiled in return, the banter was a good sign; he had worried when he had gotten a call from Hetty earlier, because all she had said was, that Callen had gone off the grid and that he might be in need of his friend.

That was all it had taken for Sam to suggest the nail bar visit to Michelle and Kamran. Having already dropped Aiden off at the bus stop for Military school, he knew exactly where Callen would be, same place he always went when he was feeling low. Point Sur Lighthouse.

"So…" Sam started. "Point Sur, again?"

"I'm fine Sam." Callen snapped.

Sam nodded, not believing that for a moment; he knew his friend too well. Every time Callen felt low this was one of the few spots Sam would find him in.

"Hetty said Jethro was in town." Sam nudged.

"Yep," Callen replied, he still had not turned and looked at Sam yet, and Sam was starting to get worried.

"Did you see him?" Sam asked.

"Yep." Callen said again.

Sam suppressed the urge to shake some sense into his friend.

"Gonna use more than one syllable in a reply?" He asked.

"Nope."

"Okay." Sam waited, taking a few minutes to enjoy the view and just sit there, letting his partner know that he was not alone, but that he was not pushing him.

"I'm ok Sam." Callen said after about five minutes.

Sam knew it was a lie, but he waited to see what Callen would say.

"You don't have to be here Sam." Callen sighed.

"Yes, I do; you need me here," Sam replied. "I don't know what's been going on but I'm worried, this isn't like you. Hetty's worried too."

"What did she tell you?" Callen snapped, finally turning to look at Sam.

His eyes looked tired and the fear on his face, though quickly hidden, did not go unnoticed by his friend.

"G?" Sam's concern was palpable, and Callen flinched at how much he must have revealed.

"It's nothing Sam. I… I had to go and see Marco, let's just say it didn't go so well."

"What happened?"

Callen shook his head, "Nothing… nothing happened."

"So why are you here?"

Callen looked out across the ocean, once again wishing he was anywhere else but where he was.

"Just thinking Sam, it's been a hell of a day."

"Wanna get a drink and talk about it?" Sam asked, hoping to get Callen to move away from the edge of the cliff.

Callen sighed, stood up and wiped his hands down his jeans, "You buying?" He asked with a slight smile.

"If it gets you away from that ledge." Sam snapped.

"What?" Callen stopped and turned, looking at his partner confused.

"Dammit, Sam, I wasn't gonna jump!" Callen frowned and stalked past his partner and headed to the parking lot, leaning on the challenger and waiting for Sam to catch up with him.

"G!" Sam called as he jogged to catch up with him. "I'm sorry man ok? It's just… well, both you and I know what this place is to you."

"I told you that in confidence, it's been a long time since then."

Sam nodded in understanding. "But with all that's been going on I was worried."

"It's been tough, but I'm not suicidal Sam, I just needed to get my head together and figure out my next move."

"Have you?"

Callen did not answer and climbed into the car, then he closed the door, waiting for Sam to join him.

"So… have you?" Sam asked again.

Callen smiled, "Yeah."

Sam started the car and headed out of the parking lot, "So…" He prompted.

"I'm going to get drunk." Callen smirked.

Sam growled he knew he was being stalled. "G?"

"I'm gonna get drunk, box up this whole mess, take a day and then go back to work."

"G you need to sort this out."

Callen shrugged, "There is nothing to work out. I fucked up Sam. I let too much slip, that's on me. He has his new life, Gibbs and a whole backup crew. I'm going back to what I know. I mean, Hetty hasn't fired me. She just told me to take some time, so that is exactly what I am going to do. I figure two days, one to get drunk, one to deal with the hangover and I'm good to go."

Ten minutes later, and for Callen, one double Scotch and half a beer down, Sam finally tried again.

"So, You wanna tell me what's going on?"

"I made a mistake, I lost control. I tried to kill Marco," he stopped and waited while Sam took in what he had said.

"You… what?!"

"I saw red; he killed Alexei, I wanted to hurt him." Callen sighed. "I was wrong, okay? I know this now. I talked to Carter."

"You talked to Carter?" Sam said in surprise.

Callen laughed sourly, "Talk? I couldn't stop; it was like my mouth disconnected from my brain." He admitted.

"Do you feel better for it?" Sam asked.

Callen took a drink of his ice cold beer, he was clearly in no rush to answer Sam's question.

"Yeah, Sam, yeah… I think I do." Callen replied after thinking a few seconds.

Sam smiled, "Well then, why the moping at Point Sur?"

"I wasn't moping," Callen snapped as he turned the beer absent-mindedly in his hand. "I was thinking."

Sam smiled, "Looked like moping to me."

"Yeah, well, you were wrong." Callen was unable to resist the small smile he shot in his partner's direction.

"Me? Wrong… never." Sam smirked at his friend. "You, Grisha Aleksandrovich Nikolaev Callen, were moping."

Callen full out laughed, "You've been dying to do that for a while haven't you?"

Sam nodded, "Of course. I wanted to be the first to, full name you for doing something."

"Well, the honor is all yours." Callen could not resist the chuckle that escaped him as he said it.

"You feeling better?" Sam asked as Callen pushed away his beer.

Callen nodded, "Yeah, I've had enough. It just sucks that I sabotaged myself again and lost a good friend through it."

Sam looked at him worried, but Callen shook his head, "It doesn't matter; life is like that, people come into your life and then they leave. I'll miss him, but Marco needs him more in his life than I do." He mused, not realizing he was talking aloud.

Callen had no need to say who he was talking about; Sam knew it was Gibbs.

"I have two kids G." Sam said quietly.

Callen looked up at him, his head cocked at an angle trying to understand what his partner was talking about.

"I know that Sam." He shrugged.

"I love both of them." Sam stated. "I can be angry at them, but still care. I can support one and still be there for the other one at different times. Even when Kamran needs me more than Aiden, it doesn't mean I don't worry about him or that I won't be there if Aiden needs me."

"You having problems with your kids Sam?" Callen asked concerned. "You and Michelle are great parents, they are good kids."

Callen was worried at the change of tone in his friend, was Sam telling him there was something wrong with the children he thought of as his niece and nephew?

"I'm not a parent, but if you need me to help, maybe talk to Aiden or Kamran…" He offered.

Sam shook his head. "You're missing the point. Gibbs thinks of you and Marco as his kids."

Callen smiled sadly, "No, he doesn't, Marco yeah. He's been with Gibbs for 13 years; Gibbs thinks of him like a son, but I'm just a friend and nothing more than that. Marco needs him right now. Besides, Aiden never tried to kill Kamran."

Sam smirked, "You've never seen them fight, sibling rivalry can sometimes be more dangerous than some of the terrorists we face. Mind you when they are like that I tend to send Michelle in."

"Aiden ever held a knife to Kam's throat?" Callen laughed.

"You're missing the point G." Sam sighed, shaking his head at his friend's failure to be serious. "The point is that Gibbs will not blame you. He probably worries about you as much as he does Marco. Maybe more."

"Why?" Callen failed to believe what Sam was saying.

"Because that's what parents do G." Sam said matter of factly.

"He's not my parent." Callen insisted. "He's my friend, just like you're my friend and not my parent."

Sam laughed, "Yet more than once you've accused me of being your mother, or your brother. Face it G, we are family. You have a family."

Callen glared at his drink, hoping that Sam would stop this line of conversation.

He jumped as two voices joined in the conversation.

"He's right Mr. Callen." Hetty said as she joined them.

"He is right," Gibbs agreed. "We are your family Callen."

"No you're not." Callen argued stubbornly. You are my friends… you were my friends, but we are not family. I have no…"

"STOP!" Gibbs raised his voice enough to make his point, but not enough to make the other patrons at the bar look over at them. "Just stop G. I learned a long time ago that you don't have to be biologically related to someone for them to be family."

Callen looked up at that, "Yes, why are you here? Doesn't he need you actually, don't answer that. Look Gibbs, I know I made a mistake. I walked away, just let me go… please?"

Hetty nearly gasped at the pain in her boy's voice.

"Mr. Callen," She said, worried. "I promised you a long time ago that you could stay with me as long as you wanted, that I would be there for you. Are you planning on leaving us now?"

Callen thought for a moment, what did he want? Did he want to do what his gut was telling him to? Did he want to run? Leave it all behind and start again... Alone? Or did he want to stay with this woman who was like a mother to him, along with the team he had formed as family?

No, he did not want to, that was certain, but he had crossed the line. He had attacked Marco, not the other way around, and worse, he had been the one to break Hetty's rule about using the list. It had been gnawing at him for a while, he had let her down. She in turn had already told him that she would terminate him with extreme prejudice. Could he really be responsible for another Callen death on her conscience knowing that she had suffered for years after the death of his mother.

He looked at her, opening his mouth a few times unsure what to say.

"Truth…" Gibbs prompted, knowing Callen was trying to figure out how to reply.

"I want to go… I don't want to cause you any more pain," He said quietly looking at Hetty. "I know what you have to do, but If I run… if I leave, you won't have to. Maybe they will send someone else."

"Who will send someone else?" Hetty looked at him confused.

"You said… if I used the list…" He found he was unable to verbalize the rest of his thoughts.

Hetty looked guilty, "I said I would terminate you with extreme prejudice. I didn't say I would kill you."

"But…" Callen was surprised, because that was exactly what he thought she had meant.

"I meant that you would no longer be able to work with this team, or as part of a federal agency again, but only if you used it without my knowledge or permission putting yourself in danger again. You didn't do this. You took Anna Kolcheck, you worked as part of a team. My earlier statement did not apply," Hetty clarified. "I would never do anything to hurt you."

Callen cocked his head to one side in amusement, remembering that time when she had actually tasered him.

"Chastisement is one thing," Hetty said "But deliberately hurting you is another thing. It's what a parent does, sometimes you need to learn and you need a firm hand."

"You're not…" Callen started to argue again, but one look from the diminutive woman stopped him in his tracks. True, she was not his mother, but she was the nearest thing he had ever had to one, and to deny that would be an insult to all she had done for him over the years. "I'm sorry." His shoulders slumped and his face crumpled.

Hetty sat one side of him and Sam moved, allowing Gibbs to sit the other side.

"Your family may be unconventional, but it is your family. Even if you mess up we will not walk away from you. Sam, myself and Hetty will always be here for you." Gibbs said.

"Until you're not." Callen sighed.

"Not gonna happen brother," Sam interjected. "You may leave NCIS, I might leave, but we will always be family. You, me, Michelle, the kids, Gibbs and Hetty. You keep being on a downer like this and you'll never get out of that hole you're digging."

Callen looked at the drink in front of him, he knew that he needed to change his way of thinking; Carter had taught him that. Even so, the idea of really being a part of a family, a part of a whole scared him.

A new shadow fell across him and he stopped still, as a light hand covered his.

"We are all family Callen, and we will always be family," Anna's voice breathed in his ear, "We are stronger because you brought us all together. You made us the family that you needed. I am never going anywhere, we have ties together, you and me."

While he had been lost in his own retrospective, Sam had texted Anna and when she had arrived, Gibbs had slipped out to make room for her.

"We have ties?" Callen asked softly, turning to her.

Anna smiled and nodded.

Callen's smiled grew more pronounced, and he pulled her into his arms kissing her deeply.

For now, for a while at least, he would hold onto their secret, but soon he and Anna would share it with his family.

For that is what they were, family, his family. It was unimportant how it had come about, or how it looked. A grizzled old Marine, an African/American ex-Navy Seal, a diminutive ex-spy and a Russian beauty. They were his, and he loved them all.

God help anyone who hurt them, because he would defend them with Extreme Prejudice.